Letting Go (16 page)

Kissing Jagger’s bare chest, I smiled when a low rumble let me know he was waking up.

“The sun is up, Jag, it’s time for you to get up too.”

His free hand lightly fell to my messy hair and trailed down to my bare back. “Tell me I’m not dreaming,” he pleaded, his voice rough and raspy from sleep.

Wiggling out of his grasp, I hovered over him and smiled. “Not dreaming. And as much as I want to spend all morning in this bed with you, I’m covered in black smudges, and so are your sheets.”

A lopsided grin covered his face as his eyes roamed over my naked body. “And they look perfect on you.”

I gave him a droll look then rolled my eyes. “I’m sure. I’m gonna jump in your shower.”

“Don’t be gone long.”

Kissing him quickly, I climbed off him and the bed before he could get me to stay there, and laughed at the way he pouted before lying back down.

As soon as the water was hot enough, I pulled my hair back up into a bun and stepped into the large, open shower. My eyes shut as I enjoyed the hot water spraying all over me, and before I’d even begun trying to de-charcoal myself, Jagger was stepping in behind me.

“Took too long,” he grumbled as he wrapped his arms around me, pulling me back against his chest.

“Three minutes is too long?”

“After last night?” His lips went to my neck, causing me to shiver. “Yeah, it’s too long.”

Jagger

August 14, 2014

I
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my fingers on my knees as I waited for the food I’d ordered. I’d only been away from Grey for fifteen minutes, and I was anxious to get back. I was still struggling with the thought that all this was a dream, and that I would wake up and Grey and I would be exactly where we’d been when I’d dropped her off at her parents’ house the night before. If it was a dream, I wanted to enjoy it as long as possible. If it wasn’t, I wanted to enjoy her every second for the rest of my life.

An order came up, but it wasn’t mine, and I shook my head when I realized how ridiculous I was being. She would be there. We would eat our late breakfast and hang out until she had to go to work—like we usually did. Nothing would be different, and yet everything would. The knowledge that Grey LaRue was finally mine after nine years of waiting was making it impossible to stop smiling.

I felt like such a girl.

Grabbing my wallet, I pulled out the worn and torn piece of paper from behind my license and unfolded it. As I looked over the four words I’d written down almost a decade ago, a strange sense of peace coursed through my body knowing that I was finally going to get the chance to give her this note—that I was finally going to get to ask her what I’d wanted to for far too long.

“Jagger.”

My head shot up as I quickly refolded the note and started putting it back into my wallet, but my fingers froze when I saw LeAnn standing in front of me.

“How are you?” she asked as she sat down next to me.

I looked up to where the orders were coming out and bit back a curse as I slowly finished putting the note in my wallet and my wallet in my back pocket. “I’m good. How are you?”

“I’m really great,” she said excitedly. Her voice softened and she placed her hand on my forearm, causing me to look over at her when she said, “I wanted to talk to you.”

“LeAnn, I already told you—”

“No, I know. I wanted to tell you how sorry I am for how I reacted a couple months ago. I felt so stupid that night after I’d thought about it, but I’ve been too nervous to say anything to you. And then the only times I’ve seen you, you’ve been with Grey, and I didn’t want to make it awkward by apologizing about something like that in front of her.”

“She already knows,” I said with a shrug, and looked around the restaurant again. “I told her awhile ago.”

Her eyebrows shot up. “Oh, you did? Well, that’s embarrassing for me, but it’s good that you two are so open with each other.”

My fingers started drumming faster. I wanted to get away from LeAnn . . . I wanted to get back to Grey.

“So, she’s the lucky girl, huh?”

My hands stilled, and I slowly looked back at LeAnn.

She started talking again as soon as I was looking at her. “I think it’s great, Jagger, really I do. I always knew how you felt about her, that’s why I never liked her in high school—but you two really deserve each other. She deserves someone like you after what happened with Ben, and you deserve the girl who’s always held your heart.” LeAnn smiled shakily and looked away for a second. “I’d always hoped you’d feel that way about me one day, and I think that’s why I was so mad when I saw you in the convenience store the other month, because I finally realized that you never would.”

I didn’t say anything as I continued to stare at her. I didn’t know how to respond to her words, or what she expected me to say. I couldn’t apologize, because I wasn’t sorry for getting away from LeAnn, or for loving Grey. And, honestly, I didn’t know how to deal with the sane LeAnn I’d seen three times now. This was completely unlike the girl I’d known.

“Anyway!” She pointed toward the seating area of the restaurant for a second before shooting me a bright smile. “I should get back to breakfast, I just saw you over here and thought this would be my only chance to apologize.”

I nodded and looked up when my name was called for the order. “Well, I appreciate it, but I’m fine with keeping everything that’s happened in the past,” I said when I stood up and grabbed the bags of food.

“Right. In the past.” LeAnn looked behind her, and I noticed the same guy from the restaurant a few weeks ago watching us. “Anyway, have a good rest of your week. I’ll see you around.”

“Bye, LeAnn.” I turned and walked out of the restaurant with her still watching me, but I refused to look back.

No matter how she was acting now, I would never forget the person she had been. I could keep it in the past, but that didn’t mean I trusted her now, or ever would.

I’d just gotten into my car when my phone started ringing. My brow scrunched together when I saw it was from the LaRues’ house.

“Hello?”

“Mr. Easton, I distinctly remember telling you my daughter was not to stay at your house last night.”

My chest tightened and my head fell back onto the headrest as I prepared for Grey’s dad to yell at me, tell me he wanted me to stay away from his daughter, something bad that would match his pissed-off tone.

“Sir, I’m—”

“And seeing how my daughter took off in the middle of the night, and she’s still not home, I can only guess that she’s with you.”

I waited for a few seconds to see if he would continue, then admitted, “She’s not with me at this exact moment, but she is waiting for me to come back with breakfast.”

“Jagger . . . tell me something. Do my wishes for my daughter mean nothing to you? Do you not care about my demands?”

“No, that—I mean, yes, they all mean something to me. But that’s not what this is. I’m not trying to go against your word. I’m sorry you’re upset with me, I did drop Grey off at home last night, and I had no idea she was coming over until she showed up.”

“So, then why didn’t you do the smart thing and send her back home?”

I sat there staring at the roof of my car as I tried to think of an answer that would make him happy—but there was none. “To be completely honest with you, Mr. LaRue, I would never ask Grey to leave if she came to me. No matter what it was for.”

He sighed heavily and mumbled, “I know you wouldn’t. I’m glad she has you, but you have to understand something. That’s still my—” He cut off abruptly, and all I heard was his broken breathing. “That’s still my little girl, and she’s been through hell. It is my job as her father to protect her until she belongs to someone else.”

“I know she has, I want to protect her too.”

There was a long silence before he cleared his throat and said, “Grey is an adult, and I can’t stop her from doing what she wants to, just the same as I can’t stop my son. But that will never stop me from trying to keep her heart from breaking again. Grey’s heart and well-being are my priority.”

“I’d do anything to make sure I never hurt her. Her heart means everything to me,” I assured him.

“Well then, keep her fed and make sure she comes home safely.”

I smiled for the first time since LeAnn appeared in front of me. “Yes, sir. Mr. LaRue?”

“Hmm?”

“I plan on marrying your daughter one day.”

Another beat of silence, then, “I know that too. And you should know now that I don’t think there’s a better match for her than you. Darcy and I would be happy for our daughter to marry you.”

“Thank you. Thank you—that means a lot to me.”

“Now go on and get my daughter something to eat. If she comes back to us starving, I may have to rethink what I just told you.”

I barked out a laugh and turned on my car. “You don’t have to worry about that. Have a good day, Mr. LaRue.”

As soon as the conversation was over, I pulled out of my spot and started back to the warehouse. The smile that wouldn’t leave me seemed to widen as I replayed the conversation over in my head.

Grey was waiting on one of the couches in nothing but one of my shirts when I returned, and her face lit up as soon as she saw me. “You were gone forever!”

“Felt like it,” I agreed, and set the food down on the counter before walking up to her. Pulling her off the couch, I lifted her in my arms and started walking toward the stairs.

“What about the food?” she asked on a laugh, her arms going around my neck as I climbed the stairs.

“I saw LeAnn, and she apologized for how she reacted back when you were in Seattle, and she said she was happy for us.”

Grey’s eyes widened. “Really, now?”

I rolled my eyes and nodded. “And then your dad called me when I got in my car . . .” I trailed off and laughed when Grey’s face completely fell. “He’s not mad at you, he was unhappy with me. That is, until I reminded him how much you mean to me.”

“Are you serious? What did you say?”

I lowered Grey onto the bed, shrugged slowly, and crawled in after her, taking her shirt off once I was kneeling over her body. “All you need to know is that your dad is fine, and that he threatened me if you came back starving, and that I’m going to love you forever.”

She smiled just before I could press my mouth to hers, and she pushed against my chest so she could slowly inch my shirt up over my head. “Well then, you better let me eat.”

“I will, as soon as I get done showing you how much I love you.”

Chapter 13

Grey

August 16, 2014

I
CALLED OUT
a good-bye to everyone at work and headed out to my car. I was pulling my phone out of my purse to call Jagger to see what he wanted for dinner when I stopped short at the sight of the woman who was standing next to my car. My eyebrows pulled together as I looked closer at the sobbing woman and took another few steps toward her.

“Mrs. Easton?”

She whirled around and wiped quickly at her cheeks when she saw me. “Oh, Grey, I’m so sorry—”

“Did something happen to Jagger?” I asked in a rush, my heart pounding at the thought of losing him.

“No! No, God no. He’s fine, it’s me.”

I took calming breaths as I closed the distance between us and wrapped my arms around her. “I’m sorry, I just—sorry. How are you, and what’s going on that has you crying?”

She wiped at her wet cheeks again when I released her and tried to laugh, but it sounded forced. “I feel so stupid coming to you for this. I need to ask you a
huge
favor.”

“Of course, anything.”

“But you can’t tell Jagger.”

I paused for a second, and she noticed my hesitation.

“Please, Grey, it would kill him if he knew. He would try to do everything to make it better, and I just can’t do that to my son.”

“Okay,” I said warily. “What is it?”

Taking a large breath, she held it for a few seconds and blinked rapidly, like she was trying to stop more tears from coming on. “I need money. I got laid off, and Mike took everything and bailed on me.”

My head jerked back. “What? Oh my God. I’m so sorry. I didn’t even know you had a—wait, who’s Mike?”

She waved her hand dismissively. “He’s gone, it doesn’t matter. But Jagger told me not to date him, he
begged
me not to. He said Mike would do something like this to me, but I didn’t listen to him. I didn’t believe Mike would leave me, and now I have nothing. No money, no car, nothing. I’m going to lose my house . . . I can’t even afford to buy Keith’s food,” she sobbed.

“Mrs. Easton, I’m sorry. I don’t even know what else to say.”

“And I know Jagger. He’ll go after Mike. Mike threatened him every time Jagger stopped by the house, and the last time Jagger was there, he told Mike he’d kill him if he did anything to me. I can’t let my son go to jail because I was too stupid, and I know he’ll go to extremes to make sure I’m okay. He’ll give me everything he has, that’s just how he is. I
can’t
do this to him.”

I stood there in shock. I wanted to know why Jagger hadn’t told me about Mike, but knew that he would do anything to keep me from anything painful. “That’s why Jagger was mad at you,” I mumbled.

Mrs. Easton’s eyes widened. “What?”

“That day we were moving Jagger into the warehouse and you came by, that’s why he was mad. Because of Mike . . . right?”

“Oh, sweet girl. I’m so sorry you had to see that. He was just trying to protect me.”

Of course he was. Because that’s what Jagger did. Protect people. “How much do you need?”

“Two thousand. That will cover the bills until I can find another job.”

“Two thousand?” My jaw dropped, and I scrambled for something to say. “I don’t—I don’t have that kind of money. I just started working and I’m trying to pay off student loans as fast as possible.”

A hard sob burst from Mrs. Easton’s chest, and she covered her mouth to quiet her cries. “Oh God. Oh God.” She turned her body away from me, but I still heard her whisper, “What am I gonna do?”

“I can . . .” I trailed off, and felt sick at the thought. But this was Jagger’s
mom
. I couldn’t let her lose her house. “I can give you a thousand.” The offer came across as a question more than anything. “I’m sorry it’s not enough, but it’s all I have. If I could just tell Jag—”

“No!” she nearly shouted, and turned to face me again. “That’s fine, anything you can afford is fine, but you can’t tell him. If he knew about this, he would give me everything . . . I told you that. He’d give me money even if it meant he wouldn’t be able to pay his own bills.”

I looked around helplessly for a few seconds before nodding. “Okay. I have to write a check, though. I can’t pull all that out at the ATM.”

“Oh, Grey, you’re a lifesaver. I swear, as soon as I get another job I’ll pay you back.”

“I know you will.” I gave her a weak smile as I searched for a pen in my purse and walked over to my car.

Setting the checkbook on the hood, I wrote out a check to her for one thousand dollars. I tried not to think of the fact that I would now only have enough left in my account to pay my cell-phone bill and buy gas. I just swallowed back the sick feeling and continued chanting to myself that this was Jagger’s mom and little brother, and I needed to help them.

“Here you go, Mrs. Easton. I’m so sorry that all this happened to you.”

Pulling me in for a tight hug, she held me for a few seconds as fresh tears began welling up in her eyes. “Thank you, honey. Thank you so much.” Cupping my cheek for a moment, she smiled shakily at me. “You’re such a sweet girl, I’m so glad my Jagger has you.”

I watched as she turned and began walking away. “Do you need a ride home?”

She glanced back and rested her hand over her chest. “No, honey, the walk will give me time to think. Thank you.”

Once she had turned the corner, I got into my car and gave myself a few minutes to gather myself before calling Jagger.

“Hey, I was just getting ready to call you.”

“Sorry.”

There was a long pause, and just when I realized that I hadn’t said anything else, he asked, “You okay?”

“Of course!” I shook off the sick feeling and straightened in my seat. “I’m sorry, it was a long day, and then I got caught up at the end . . . I’m just a little out of it. But what do you want for dinner?”

“I already ordered Chinese so you wouldn’t have to cook or anything since you had to go in on your day off.”

A smile pulled at my lips. “Sounds perfect, I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

After ending the call, I knew I was right in helping his mom and in not telling Jagger. She was right. Even though Mrs. Easton had always been a little flighty, Jagger would do anything to take care of his mom. Just as he had always done for Charlie and me.

I
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Graham’s door a few hours later after spending time with Jagger, and jumped back a little when it immediately opened and a big mass of a guy bear-hugged me.

“Where’ve you been all my life, girl?”

“Can’t breathe,” I choked out, and hit him as hard as I could. “God, Deacon!” I hissed when he released me, and hunched over to pull in quick and uneven breaths as I tried to fill my lungs.

“Don’t be so dramatic, Grey. You’re fine.”

I glared up at him like he’d lost his mind. “Fine? Do you know that it feels like being slammed into a brick wall when you do that?” I tried to hold my anger, but the face he was making made it impossible, and by the time I finished talking, I was smiling.

“See? You’re not even mad at me.”

Pushing at his chest to walk into the house, I shook my head. “I
am
mad at you, you just make it hard to stay mad.”

“When are you going to stop breaking my heart and realize you’re in love with me?” he asked as he slung an arm around my neck, pulling me in close to his side.

I barked out a laugh, then pulled away and skipped ahead of him. “Hmm . . . let me think.”

“Never,” Graham answered for me, and I turned around just in time to be engulfed in his hug.

“Come on, dude,” Deacon complained. “She’s breaking my fucking heart.”

“She’s my fucking sister!”

“And I’m also taken,” I chimed in, and Deacon did a dramatic move like I’d just wounded him. “Don’t act like you’re hurt, how many
different
girls have you been with this week alone, Deacon?”

“Three,” he responded immediately, and a wry smile crossed his face when the doorbell rang. “And that would be number two coming back again.”

“You’re gross, and obviously not brokenhearted.”

Grabbing the back of my head, he landed a loud kiss on my forehead before dodging Graham’s fist and backing up toward the entryway. “I’ll always be brokenhearted when it comes to you, Grey LaRue,” he teased.

“I fucking hate my roommates,” Graham growled once Deacon had disappeared.

Turning to look at him, I raised one eyebrow and walked over to plop down on one of the couches. “No you don’t, and I don’t know why you had me come
here
when you know they’re going to act the way they do.” I looked around for a second before asking, “Speaking of, where’s Knox?”

“Gone. Thank God. I don’t think I’d be able to stop from punching one of them if they were both here.”

“Once again: I don’t know why you had me come here when you know how they always act.”

Knox and Deacon had been Graham’s best friends since middle school, and after years of partying together in a fraternity, they all decided they weren’t ready to settle down or give up the party. They bought a large house in Thatch, and continued to live like frat boys.

Both were handsome in a way that had women of all ages turning to look at them, and they knew it. Their egos as well as Graham’s added up to a recipe for destruction for any girl who entered their lives, and many did. I’d grown up with Knox and Deacon and viewed them as two more obnoxious brothers to deal with, but Graham never seemed to get the memo that we all viewed each other as siblings. Knowing his annoyance at my involvement with Ben and Jagger, both Knox and Deacon had been declaring their “love” for me since I was sixteen just to piss him off, and six years later, it still worked.

Deacon walked back into the living room with a busty, black-haired girl against his side, and shot me a wink as they continued on to the hallway leading to his room.

I gestured toward the hallway they’d disappeared in and whispered to Graham, “At least he’s starting to go for girls outside of Thatch. The three of you have half the female population simultaneously hating you and waiting for another chance to be with you.” Graham laughed, and I slapped at his arm. “It’s not funny. Do you know how often I get asked about one of you, or receive phone numbers from women wanting you to call them again ‘just in case you lost it’? It’s annoying.”

“Come on, you haven’t even been back in Thatch for a total of a month and a half when you take out your trip to Seattle. It can’t be that bad yet.”

I didn’t respond to that, I just gave him a look telling him he was so wrong.

“And I wanted you here because I’m hiding from Mom,” he continued.

“Wait, what? Why?”

“Haven’t you heard her lately? Or have you been too wrapped up in your new relationship.”

I opened my mouth to deny that, and smiled when I realized I couldn’t.

“Exactly.”

“Oh, whatever. Tell me why you’re hiding.”

Graham groaned and got comfortable on the couch. “She wants me to move out of here and get my own place, without a roommate, and she’s trying to get me to settle down. She has a new list of
eligible girls
every time I come over or talk to her.”

“Eligible?” I asked on a laugh. “Oh my God, are you serious?”

He sat up and tried to imitate Mom’s voice. “ ‘They’re single and absolutely
darling
girls. You’d be lucky to be with any one of them; besides, they’re not like the floozies you normally date.’ ”

I laughed harder and had to wait until I could breathe normally before asking, “Floozies? She really says that?”

“Now you see why I’m hiding?”

“A little,” I admitted.

“She acts like I’m in my midthirties or something. She just keeps saying all the good ones will be gone by the time I realize I’m ready to settle down, so she’s trying to help me see what I’m missing. I’m only twenty-four.”

“Or maybe she’s saying that because she’s secretly hoping you’ll stop whoring yourself around.”

Graham’s foot shot out and connected with my knee. “Don’t be a brat, you know I’m not getting paid.” He grinned wickedly and shrugged. “Whatever, I think she just wants me to be like you.”

My eyebrows rose. “Like me?” I asked dully.

“Yeah. Twenty-two and already with the guy of your dreams, or some bullshit like that. You’ve always known exactly what you want when it comes to who you want to be with, there’s never been a question with Ben or—” Graham cut off quickly, his eyes widening when he realized what he was saying.

I waited for a second to see if he would continue or backtrack, but he just sat there staring directly past me, looking like he was kicking himself for saying anything. “With Ben or Jagger?” I offered, and Graham’s eyes flashed back over to mine.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to—”

“Graham, it’s fine. You’re allowed to talk about Ben. Jagger and I talk about him.”

“But it—I don’t know, and then after what’s been happening . . .”

I smiled and squeezed his arm for a second. “But it’s fine. Even with everything that’s happened, I can still talk about him. When all that shit went down, I was struggling, yeah, but only because I was confused and upset. I had a hard time dealing with the stolen vows and the Facebook messages, but none of that made a difference for me with what happened to Ben.”