Learning to Heal (18 page)

Tru spots him first. “There. By Mason and the band’s drummer.” I look their way, Mason winks at me and my face turns ten shades of red. Totally unusual for me. I never get embarrassed unless I’m naked, and I’ve rarely been naked in front of anyone.

“Jazz? Are you blushing like a virgin? Oh my God! You are.” Cory laughs and nudges my shoulder. “How fucking sweets is that? My girl is in love.”

I glance up quickly and eye my friend. Trudy just smiles at me. “I am so so so so not in love. And I wasn’t blushing either. I just got hot.”

“Sure you did. And by hot you mean nipples hard and horny. Then I’ll believe you.” She leans in and whispers before I can argue. “He’s uber lick-o-licious and I think he loves you too.” She backs away while her words just play over in my head like a damn merry-go-round. “Now, bitches, I need to dance.”

Before I know it my thoughts are distracted by my friends lining me up on the dance floor. I keep my hands on my stomach as we make our way through the active crowd. Then I hear the song and squeal. The Wobble has every single girl on the floor shaking their ass. I can’t help but laugh happily and enjoy my birthday. Plus the start to a new year with new friendships. Maybe now I can leave my mistakes behind and enjoy my future family and myself.

After one more song has kicked my ass, I make my way to our table. Before I reach it, however, Lyric gets back on stage and announces we have one minute until midnight. As everyone gets ready for his or her kiss, I look around for Mason. This will be my first New Year’s kiss and I want it to be with the one guy who makes me feel special. The one guy who believes I’m more than a pretty face. The one guy who might just love me. But I don’t see him. Maybe he went to the restroom.

Shrugging my shoulders, I decide to wait before I bust up in the men’s room. Standing by the table, I let my eyes roam over every male, but I still can’t see him in the crowd. Being short sucks sometimes and this is definitely one of those times. I decide to stand in one of the chairs. Probably not the smartest idea with these boots, but desperate times call for desperate measures, right? And this kiss is an emergency dammit! Slowly, I pull myself on the chair and stand to my full height and the added two-inch heels don’t hurt either. Our table is unfortunately in the middle of the bar, so I have to turn in a circle to scan the whole place. I hear the countdown starting and feel like a complete loser with no one to kiss me while everyone is paired up. Even Cory is sitting on the bar beside Chris, ready to kiss into the New Year. Mason is going to get an ass chewing when I find him. Making one more turn, I lose my footing and start to fall. Nobody hears me due to the crowd screaming along with the countdown.

“Five.”
 

“Four.”
 

“Three.”
My heart drops and I hold my baby bump, bracing myself for impact.

“Two.”

It doesn’t come though. Instead I feel strong arms.

“One.”
 

Keeping my eyes squeezed shut, I hold my breath as everyone yells “Happy New Year.” Then I feel soft, warm lips crush against mine. Dumbfounded, I open my eyes and see familiar deep green ones looking into mine. Mason.

Wrapping my arms around his neck, I practically jump into his mouth, rubbing my tongue against his and feeling the moist warmth and smelling his intoxicating scent. Best fucking feeling ever! He loses his balance from my attack and sits in the chair I just fell from. Wanting to crawl under his skin, I straddle his lean body and start to grind against his hard length.

“It’s time to go. I want my birthday wish.” He doesn’t argue and we leave before anyone can stop us or ask questions that I’m not ready to answer. Honestly, I don’t know how to answer them. Leaving his truck at the bar, we take my BMW and haul ass to my apartment. Luckily the drive isn’t awkward like one might think. I keep myself occupied. I’m so hot and ready explode I do something I’ve never done before. Well, actually two things: one is giving a blow job and two is doing it to someone while they drive. When I reach for his crotch, I feel nervous excitement mix with my pheromones. What if I don’t do it right? What if he thinks I really suck at sucking dick?
Only one way to find out.
 

Mason grabs my hand as I reach for his zipper. “What the hell, Jazz?” His voice is breathy and deep. The sound is nothing like the porno movies I watched as a curious teenager. It’s more real and actually sexy. Instead of laughing from the fake acting, I find myself rubbing my face into the crook of his neck and inhaling. Damn! Why does he smell so good?  

Licking under his ear, I love the chills I elicit along his skin. “I need to touch you. Please, Mason!” When his hand lets go of mine, I slowly get to work. He actually helps with the button of his jeans before I dig in like it’s Christmas morning. When the smooth, soft skin over hard muscle is resting in my palm, heat builds deep in my belly and my moan is surprising to both of us. “Let me know if I’m doing something wrong,” I whisper before kissing his pulse and then dive in, eager to get my prize.

“Holy damn, b—baby!”

His hips thrust up with the first contact of my tongue on the tip. The salty taste mixed with his obvious enjoyment is friggin’ amazing and I want more. Wrapping my lips fully around him, I feel his fingers thread through my hair. When I suck in, his grip tightens as he says words that would make a sailor blush. I work my way from base to tip several times, getting him moist, and let my hand grip the base, following my mouth’s lead for more friction. I don’t know how long I’ve been at it or if we’re even at my apartment, but I plan on keeping it up until he comes. I don’t have to wait long after that last thought. Mesmerized by the feel of him actually getting harder and longer, I scrap my teeth lightly on the underside of his dick. Then he explodes and holds me against him as he pumps his hips.

“Fuck, Jasmine! Fuck … fuck … fuck!”

With his last thrust I swallow every last drop before sitting up. Looking into his features shadowed from the streetlights, I see his nostrils flaring with his labored breaths. I smile and try to comb my hair that has gone everywhere while he fixes himself and wonder what’s next. Should I kiss him or ask how I did? I hope he liked it. Maybe he faked it like I have in the past. But I taste come in my mouth, so maybe not. I try not to let these thoughts dampen my newly discovered sex goddess but what if I did suck? What if he decides that he got what he wanted and now wants to leave? Like Ollie. And why the hell am I comparing the two?

“Come here.” I look up just as he grabs my face with both hands along my cheeks before he brings his mouth to mine. This kiss is different. This kiss is gentle, slower, and deeper, not desperate like before. This kiss answers my unspoken questions and confirms Cory’s statement from earlier. Mason Reed loves me. But will he still after he sees the real me? If he learns my secrets? Soon these thoughts vanish with the feel of his mouth on mine while his skilled fingers comb my hair. Now it’s my turn to be breathless, and he does a damn fine job too.

After he’s done giving me a kiss that causes my toes to curl, he continues to hold my cheeks while his eyes take in my whole face almost reverently. His eyebrows arch under his dark shaggy hair like he’s trying to figure me out. I hope he doesn’t see the mistakes I’ve made and my selfishness. I only want him to see how he makes me feel: happy, healthy, and—

“Beautiful,” he whispers, and my whole body feels warm just from that one word that passes his lips.

Wanting to lighten the mood and ease up on some of this seriousness, that I’m definitely not ready for, I wink in his direction. “You’re not so bad yourself.” I know it’s corny and totally not the time, but it does cause him to smile. I kiss his nose because he’s just so dang cute. Then I make myself pull away. “Wanna crash here tonight?”

“Definitely.” He gets out of the car and walks my way to grab my hand. “Is this okay?”

Looking at him I see his worried look. It can’t hurt to hold his hand. Right? I mean it’s not like he just proposed or anything. Besides, I just had his extra appendage in my mouth so holding hands is totally fine. I think. “Um … Sure.”

We’re silent on the way up and while I unlock the door to my messy apartment. “Excuse the mess, but I couldn’t find something that really fit.” I pat my bump and it reminds me of my upcoming doctor’s appointment. “Mason? Would you mind going with me next week to the doctor? I know classes start back up, but I’m supposed to find out the sex of the baby and Trudy will be busy.”

Actually, I never asked Trudy. Mason is my first choice, but if he can’t go I’ll ask her. Or Cory. We sit beside each other on the couch and it feels normal, not weird like I thought. The fire I felt earlier is still simmering, but definitely not overwhelming like before.

“Yeah. I’d love to go but let me make sure I can get a sitter if Mom needs to work.” He puts one arm around me and pulls me close. “Happy Birthday, Jazz.” His lips land on my temple.

I can’t help but smile. Tingles run through my body and a sigh escapes me. “Thank you.” Feeling tired all the sudden, I start to doze off as my body relaxes. All the dancing really did a number on me, topping it off with my first blow job followed by ultimate make out session. Yeah! I’m pooped. Before I know it my brain is swarmed with sweet dreams of Mason.

My dick is straining for release as I pound into Jazz, but no matter how hard I thrust or how deep I go, this fucking hard-on won’t go away. I watch as her perfect breasts bounce with each thrust and I’m scared I might hurt her. But she only smiles at me with the same look she always gives me. Not turned on or hot like I’ve seen lately. Just sweet and friendly like before our first kiss. Maybe I’m doing something wrong. Maybe I’m not enough to please her. What if she is just doing it and really didn’t want to? I probably need to stop, but she feels like heaven under me and I’m not sure I can.

“Jazz. Please, baby.” I don’t know what I’m asking. All I know is she needs to give me something. Anything. Tell me to stop or try a different position. Just give me some reaction dammit! Grunting, I thrust deeper and stay there.

“Mason.” Finally she says my name but her lips don’t move. Maybe I just missed it. “Mason?” Again, her lips remain smiling.

Leaning into her warm body, I’m determined to taste her sweet swollen breasts but I can’t seem to reach them. What the hell? After the third try I finally make contact. But it’s not the warm skin I was expecting. It taste like cloth and invades my entire mouth while absorbing all the saliva and causing it to become dry. Suddenly, I can’t breathe and start to cough. Jazz screams my name right before I feel a sharp-ass sting on my shoulder blade and let out a yell while sitting up. “Shit!”

Looking around in a daze I see a very dressed Jazz in bed beside me under the blankets looking scared to death with wild hair. Glancing down at myself I realize I’m on top of the blankets and also very dressed. And very turned on. My face turns red with embarrassment because she just witnessed me having a wet dream about her and humping her bed. Rubbing my face to gain a few extra moments, I can only hope it wasn’t obvious. Then I hear her muffled giggles and know she definitely heard me. Shit!

With the urge to hide, I get up and go the bathroom, avoiding her smiling expression. Once inside, I splash cold water on my face and just stare at my reflection in the mirror. I take in my flushed skin and glazed dark eyes and wonder if she could ever fall in love with me. Someone who loves to play video games and loves anything technical. If I had a chance of looking confident and cool in her book, I’m positive it’s scratched out and has the word weirdo written in red in its place. I close my eyes and try to disappear. Rushing water hitting the porcelain sink drowns out all the noise in the room. However, I can still hear my heart pounding against my rib cage as the dream replays in my head with my newfound embarrassment closely following its tail. What am I supposed to do now? She knows I was just dreaming of us having sex, but of course the dream was justified. She gave me the best BJ I’ve ever had tonight. So I shouldn’t be embarrassed. It’s not like I jizzed on her sheets or called out her mom’s name.