Lean On Me (Take My Hand) (9 page)

“If
you make me look like Barbie I’ll cut your tits off and shit in the holes.”

“Seriously,
how are we friends?” she joked.

“I
have no fucking idea,” I teased back – though it was the absolute truth.

My
freezing nipples were knocking on someone’s door in Brazil so I slipped a black
hoody over my head before she got started. She did my nails first. Upon my
resolute refusal to wear the shade ‘Candy Sparkles’ she agreed to apply the
black polish from my bedside table.

Next,
she moved on to my face and I found the best way to cope with what was about to
happen was to close my eyes. If I couldn’t see the pink lip-gloss I wouldn’t
hyperventilate.

Holly
told me to open my eyes but it took me a few seconds to summon up the courage
and a further few to lift the 6lb of mascara weighing my lids down. I could’ve
sworn it took her three weeks and two days to complete but when I looked at the
clock it turned out it was only twenty minutes.
Be brave
, I mentally prepped myself.

“Ta
daaaaa!” Holly sang, turning the mirror to face me. Jesus Christ I looked like
a TOWIE reject. My skin would make an orange jealous and you couldn’t see my
eyes through the mass of black shit pencilled around them. “You like it?”

Are you fucking with me?

“Ummm.”

“You
don’t like it,” she muttered dejectedly, slumping her shoulders.

“It’s
not that I don’t like it. I mean this look suits
you
…” Ugh. Why have I always been so shit at sugar-coating? “I just… fuck it I’m sorry, Holly but I
look like Barbie on crack.”

“Well
I think you look cute. I could start again using your own stuff?”

“No!”
I said a little too fervently. “I’m sure it will grow on me. I’m just not used
to it, that’s all.” Hmm, maybe I could sugar-coat after all.

“Right,
let’s get you dressed up for the man of your dreams.”

Kill me now.

No seriously, God… if you’re listening
– just take me.

Like now.

“We
need to keep it simple so you don’t clash with your hair.”

Um, God? Hellooooo? Anyone there?

“Saffy?”

Thank you! I’ll start going to church I
promise.

Maybe.

“In
the bedroom!” I called through to Jared. Holly asked me what ‘saffy’ stood for
and I could only shrug because the twat still wouldn’t tell me.

“What
the hell happened to your face?” he mocked, snorting at me. Yep,
snorting
– like an actual pig.
“Oh, hey,” he tacked on when he noticed Holly.

“This
is Holly – a friend from Uni. Holly, this is Jared – a dipshit from
Kensington.”

“Nice
to meet you, sugar.” Jared smiled his adorable goofy grin at Holly and she
blushed brighter than the shade of red she’d just smeared across my lips.

“Don’t
encourage him, Hol. He already thinks he’s God’s gift.”

“So
why do you look like you’ve just stepped out of a beauty pageant?” Jared asked.

“Holly
gave me a makeover.”

“Oh.
Ummm, looks good,” he lied, probably feeling like a giant arse for offending
Holly.

“It’s
ok,” Holly said. “She’s already told me how much she hates it.” She smiled as
she spoke and I saw the tension melt from Jared’s shoulders. “But I think she
looks awesome.”

“Course
she does. Saffy would look beautiful with her head dipped in shit.” Oh man, he
did it again! He made those tickling ripples appear in my belly, making me want
to squirm. How the hell does he
do
it?

“
Saffy
?” Holly asked again, looking to
Jared and raising an eyebrow. “As in saffron?”

Jared’s
mouth twisted into a smirk and cocked his head to the side while inhaling a
small laugh.

“
Exactly
like saffron.”

“I
don’t get it,” I butted in. “Like the spice?”

Aaaaaand
ping!

“Oh
I get it. I’m not sweet enough to be your ‘sugar’ eh?”

“Aww
that’s so cute,” Holly cooed.

“
Cute
? He’s saying I’m bitter!” I snapped.
I wasn’t even mad at first but then I saw Jared shaking his head and laughing
at me and I wished I had the power in my legs to get up and kick him in the
balls.

“No
he’s not. It’s only bitter if you use too much. It actually has quite a sweet
aftertaste,” Holly interrupted. Whose friend was she here? “And did you know
it’s the most expensive spice in the world?” Okay so
maybe
that
is
kind of
cute.

“I
didn’t know you were a walking encyclopaedia, Hol.”

“My
brother’s a chef,” she said shrugging. “I’d best get going. Leave you two to
hash it out in private.”

“There’ll
be no hashing,” Jared said confidently, that beautiful, annoying-as-hell grin
of his creeping across his face. “The second I let her kiss me she’ll forget
she was ever mad at me.”

“
Let
me kiss you?” I retorted,
straightening my back.

“I’m
out of here,” Holly announced, giggling. “I’ll call you later, Rach. That’s if
this Cezanne assignment doesn’t kill me first.”

After
gathering up her makeup and stuffing it in the record-bag she takes
everywhere
with her, Holly left Jared
and I to it. I was still pouting when I heard the front door close behind her.
If I’m honest, it wasn’t the nickname pissing me off – it was the fact I
hadn’t guessed it by myself.

“Stop
sulking,” Jared teased playfully, kneeling down in front of me. The sound of
his smooth voice was pulling me out of my bad mood whether I wanted it to or
not, and I hated that he
knew
it. “Did
you get my petal?”

“Yeah,
cheapskate. Am I not special enough for flowers anymore?”

“We’re
going to be together forever, saffy. Even the world’s strongest man would
struggle to carry
that
many flowers.”

I
glanced down at my body – amazed to see that it was still there and
hadn’t in fact melted into a puddle of goo on the floor.

Refusing
to let him see that I was thawing however, I stayed quiet and set my lips into
a firm line. He breathed a small laugh at my petulance and then reached over to
the chest of drawers beside us. I watched him curiously, still refusing to
speak so I couldn’t ask him what he was looking for when he started fingering
the contents of my knicker drawer.

His
hand re-emerged with a packet of cleansing face-wipes and he stared intently
into my eyes as he slowly pulled one through the hole.

“You
don’t need all this shit,” he murmured, slowly smoothing the cold wipe across
my cheek. “You’re stunning enough without it.”

I
simply sat there and watched him – never taking my eyes of his as they
wandered over my face. What in fuck’s name is happening to me lately? I feel so
powerless with him. Jared was practically washing my face and I couldn’t do
anything but gawp pathetically at him. Why didn’t I tell him to piss off? I can
clean my own bloody face. But something about the way he was doing it - the
tender strokes, the attentive look in his eyes… He entranced me. Again.
Sometimes it feels like he has the power to control me completely and it both
excites and scares the holy crap out of me at the same time.

I
closed my eyes instinctively when he brought the wipe towards them. He wiped over
the lids with gentle pressure before bringing it down the other side of my
face. When I opened them again the wipe was gone, and he cupped the side of my
neck with his hand as he began drawing slow circles under my chin with his
thumb.

“You’re
so beautiful, Rachel Mason,” he whispered before trailing his thumb up to my
lips and sweeping across them. “Both here,” he laid a flattened palm on my
flushed cheek, “and here,” he added, placing his other palm over my heart. My
lips parted slightly but no words came out. “I got you some presents today.”

“Presents?”

“Wait
there.” After rising lithely to his feet, Jared hopped out of my bedroom and
returned seconds later with a white carrier bag. “When I heard you talking to
someone I stashed them behind the cushions on the sofa.” He handed me a bag and
my eager fingers snatched it away from him. It was the flash of pink silicone
that gave it away before I read the description on the box.

“A
Kissing Swan, huh?” I noted, teasing open the seal on the box and clamping my
fingers around the bright pink vibrator. Pulling it out I stroked along the
curves and gave the little clit-stimulating ‘lips’ a little flick.

“The
Rabbit is
so
last year,” he said with
a camp accent he was altogether too good at. “We’re going to undress now,” he
commanded firmly. I almost wanted to laugh. Had he taken a peek at the copy of
Fifty Shades Freed on my coffee table? “Then you’re going to suck my cock until
I can’t take it anymore… and then I’ll give you your other present.”

“I
think it’s polite to ask first,” I teased, playfully protesting.

“You
wanted masterful, saffy… I can give you masterful.”

Kneeling
in front of me again, Jared took hold of the hem of my hoody and teasingly
worked it up my body before sliding it over my head. After smoothing his palms
over the lace cups of my bra his fingers wandered to my back and deftly undid
the clasp. Then he set straight to work on my jeans – hooking his fingers
into the waistband, pinching my knickers too, and tugging them down as I raised
myself up with my arms.

Next,
he stood up, and for a few long seconds he let his hungry eyes gloss over my
naked body from head to toe, biting on his bottom lip and letting a low moan
escape. Never taking his eyes off mine he undressed himself. He shrugged out of
his shirt first, his muscles flexing with the move of his arms, then he pushed
his pants down until gravity took over, pulling them to the floor.

My
heart quickened when he stepped towards me with slow, purposeful strides. He stopped in front of me, holding his
proud erection in one hand. I knew what he wanted from me and the strangest
part was, I wanted it too. I swear my mouth was salivating for him as I bent my
head forwards and he uncurled his fingers from his cock, letting mine take
their place.

He
brushed the tip against my lips and my tongue instinctively darted out to
circle the end of it.

“Take
it all, Rach,” he ordered softly. I wet my lips and took him in my mouth,
sucking softly as I took him all the way to the back of my throat. “Fuck yes. Just
like that.”

He
pressed his hands onto my shoulders to steady himself as I moved my head faster
and faster. Every so often I would graze the sensitive groove below his head
with my teeth, causing him to groan and twitch in my mouth. When I eventually slowed
my pace, teasing him with slow, feathery licks, he pulled himself from the
warmth of my mouth and smiled devilishly down at me.

“I
can’t wait any longer. Time for your other present.” I stared after him, biting
my lips as I admired the way his perfect arse cheeks tightened with every
stride as he walked out of the room. My heart continued to race in anticipation
until he returned to the room holding…

“What
the fuck is
that
?”

“A
sex wedge,” he announced proudly, setting the giant foam wedge on top of the
mattress. “I Googled ‘sex after spinal cord injury’. You won’t
believe
the positions I’m gonna get you
into using this little beauty. I’ve just had my turn, saffy. Now it’s time for
yours.”

Some
girls need flowers, chocolates and candlelit dinners to make them feel wanted.
Me? Turns out all I need is a triangular lump of foam. Knowing Jared had looked
into ways to make
me
feel good, ways
to help us get physically closer and knowing that what
I
experienced during sex actually mattered to him, made me feel
like the most wanted girl in the world.

Special.
I’ve always detested that word. But in that moment, staring at the navy-blue
wedge lying suggestively on top of my bed… I had never felt so special.

Jared
scooped me in his arms and carried me to the bed before gently laying me on my
stomach over the wedge.

“She’s
called Cindy.”

“You
named
it?” I retorted, unable to stop
the laughter filtering into my voice.

“Of
course.”

“Why
Cindy?”

“Cindy’s
got a certain ‘porn star’ ring to it don’t you think?”

“Well
maybe I don’t want to be bent over a Cindy, maybe I’d feel more comfortable
being bent over a Mark or a Brad.”

“Well
I’m not sharing a bed with
anything
called
Mark or Brad, so you either get that fine body of yours acquainted with Cindy,
or you’ll be brushing your own beaver tonight while I sleep on the sofa.” Words
eluded me, so I just giggled and shook my head.

“Besides,
I’ve always wanted to know what it feels like to have two girls in my bed at
the same time,” I couldn’t see his face but I could imagine only too well the
delicious smirk it was sure to have on it.