Lawman's Perfect Surrender (9 page)

* * *

Gemma tried not to feel disappointed when Ford didn’t kiss her goodbye before she left his Escalade and headed for the front doors of Cold Plains Coffee. They were in public. He was on duty.

She’d fallen asleep against him last night, after talking the way they had. Or she had. He hadn’t talked much. That didn’t matter, though. She sensed his need for her to take it slow where his past was concerned. She’d also sensed how peaceful he’d gotten after he realized she wasn’t going to prod him with questions. Maybe sex on the stairs had meant more than it seemed.

Remembering the feel of his uniform and the way he’d looked making love to her with his shirt and badge still on made her tingle everywhere. Her face grew warm thinking about that.

Entering the shop, she glanced back and saw him still watching and she hoped he watched for reasons other than duty. Inside the shop, the plush interior was full of people. Chatter and the smell of coffee filled the air. She brushed some wayward dark brown hair away from her eye and sight of her bare wrist reminded her that she’d lost her dangling bracelet last night. She normally left it in her jewelry case but it wasn’t there when she’d looked for it. What had she done with it? After having such unbelievable sex with Ford, she couldn’t recall.

“Gemma!” Lacy walked along the counter toward the end where it opened to the rest of the shop. Her vibrancy befitted the owner of a successful business, so did her love of mornings. Lacy had a special kind of magic with people. Her sunny personality would brighten anyone’s day. It certainly had for Gemma the first time she’d met the woman.

Coming around the counter, past a line of three women dressed to the nines and chattering busily, Lacy hooked her arm with Gemma’s and whisked her toward a booth. On their way, they saw a tall, thick-muscled man dressed in tan slacks and a sharp-looking black shirt swagger into the shop. He flashed straight, healthy teeth when he saw Lacy. He also checked the entire coffee shop like a celebrity expecting a grand welcome. The man was full of himself.

“Alan? I wasn’t expecting you.” Lacy leaned in for an intimate hug, the man dwarfing her.

“Samuel is having a fundraiser over at the community center this Saturday. Are you free?”

“For you, I’m always free.”

Her infatuation and ego-stroking reply made him smile with masculine satisfaction and glance around the coffee shop to see if anyone had heard how special he was.

Gemma would rather not witness this. “If you two want to talk…”

“I only have a minute,” Alan said. “I need to get back to work.”

“You could have just called to see if I was free this Saturday.”

He lifted her hand and kissed the top, his movements lacking grace due to his bulk. “I had to see your pretty face.”

“Oh, Alan. You do know how to make my day.”

“Then I’ll have to be sure and do that more often.” He glanced around again. “And let other men know you’re mine.”

Gemma searched for somewhere to go. Empty booth, restroom…

Lacy giggled as Alan looped an arm around her waist and tried to pull her against him, an entirely inappropriate thing to do in her place of business.

Gemma was too amazed at his display to move.

“Not here, Alan.” Lacy eased away from him and looked for anyone who’d noticed.

Plenty had.

Alan stepped back, loving the attention. “Working here, you must see every single man in town.”

“As long as they buy my coffee, who am I to complain? I have two three-year-olds to feed.”

Alan seemed to brush over her mention of the children and instead seemed more concerned with marking her as his. Would he prefer she didn’t have kids? Three-year-olds could be a lot to take on, twins were even more work.

Gemma wondered if Lacy had picked up on that. She didn’t seem to. In fact, she seemed so taken by Alan, this brute-slash-greaser and aristocrat all in one.

Alan pointed at Lacy with both forefingers, nauseating Gemma. “Be good now.”

Lacy gave him a coy little wave.

He finally turned to go.

Watching him swagger out of the shop the same way he’d come in, Gemma felt her brow lift. She turned to Lacy, whose face still glowed with delight.

Baffling.

Rehooking her arm with Gemma’s, Lacy tugged her toward the booth again.

“How did you meet that guy?” Gemma asked.

“At a seminar.” She sat across from Gemma.

Lacy was sure into that community center. Seeing her new friend sparkling with happiness, Gemma dismissed anything sinister in the reason why.

“What does he do?”

“He works for Samuel over at the community center.”

“Doing what?”

Lacy hesitated and the sparkle left her happy face. “I don’t know. Whatever Samuel wants him to do, I guess.”

Vague. Shady. Didn’t that bother her?

“Are you sure he’s someone you want to be with?”

With that, Lacy shot an incensed look at her. “Absolutely. It’s been three years since the girls’ father left me. I’m ready now.”

Oh, but Gemma knew all about men who left their children and the aftereffects it could have on them. “What happened to him? Why did he leave?” Maybe that was what had driven Lacy to Samuel’s haven.

Just as she suspected, Lacy’s face fell into dark somberness, giving her away. “You and I have that in common, Gemma. We both chose badly the first time out.”

And she was about to choose badly again from what Gemma had just seen. A waitress appeared with two cups of steaming tea and decadent scones. “Thank you,” Gemma said, then turned to Lacy. “You have them trained well.”

“I asked her to bring this as soon as I saw you come in the shop.”

Gemma studied her friend a while, uncomfortable with prying too much but curious nonetheless. And uneasy.

“My story isn’t as dramatic as yours,” Lacy said without any probing. “Pretty typical, really. I caught him in bed with another woman when I was eight months pregnant.”

“That doesn’t sound typical to me. Eight months pregnant? He slept with someone else while you were pregnant?” What kind of effect had that had on her? Would she settle for any man who’d have her just to feel wanted?

Nodding, Lacy picked up a scone and took a bite, chewing with a faraway look.

“You loved him.” Gemma could see it plain as day. She probably still did. Well, that helped. If she’d known that kind of love, maybe she wouldn’t fall for the same ruse twice.

“Stupidly,” Lacy answered with repugnance, relieving Gemma more. “I was madly in love with him. And I was thrilled we were having babies together. I had no idea he was cheating on me. None whatsoever. I was supposed to spend the day with my mother, but when I arrived at her house, she wasn’t feeling well so we decided not to go shopping. I stayed with her for a little while but went home early. I heard voices upstairs. There he was in our bed with her, eating cheese and crackers. Must have just finished…and then got hungry. The strangest thoughts went through my head. I remembered buying the cheese and crackers from the grocery store. I felt like she stole them from me.”

Instead, she’d stolen Lacy’s husband. Gemma reached over and took the hand that was resting beside her cup of tea. “I’m so sorry, Lacy.”

“I think I’d rather he’d beaten me.”

She pulled her hand back and leaned against the booth. “No, you wouldn’t. I suffered more than this from my ex-husband.” She touched the skin near the biggest of her cuts and trailed her fingers over the now almost-clear bruises. “Men who beat their wives do more than physical damage. They beat their self-esteem, too. They erase the woman they married.” She lowered her hand to the table. “There’s nothing wrong with loving a man. It isn’t your fault the one you loved had no honor and integrity.”

Lacy smiled softly. “I know you’re right, Gemma. My head knows. It’s my heart that doesn’t always listen.”

“Make it listen. Is Alan really worth the risk?”

“I think he is. And besides, it’s more than that. Even if we don’t last, it’s time I moved on. The girls are three now. That’s long enough to grieve over a man who never deserved me.”

Gemma didn’t know what it was like to grieve over a man. Jed had made it easy for her to walk away. Run away.

“What about you?” Lacy asked. “I saw the way you looked at Ford when he dropped you off.”

Gemma wasn’t prepared to talk about this. Had Lacy deliberately changed the subject?

“How are things going over at your place? Getting all cozy?”

Vivid images of them on the stairs heated her face. The feel of Ford’s badge as he moved between her legs. Why did that turn her on so much?

Lacy’s head cocked and her mouth opened. “Gemma Johnson, you didn’t!”

“Didn’t what?” Was it that obvious?

“Your face is beet-red right now.” Lacy laughed lightly.

“Stop that.”

“I’m not doing anything. You stop turning red or the whole town will know you slept with Ford McCall.”

Gemma glanced around to make sure no one heard. “Be quiet!”

“Wow. It didn’t take you two very long.”

That only renewed her flaming cheeks.

Lacy laughed again. “One of those impulsive things, huh? It just happened?”

“Oh, yeah. Not much thought beforehand. We could have driven over a cliff and not been aware of it.” That was the unvarnished truth.

“Hopefully not that devastating.”

Devastating to her heart.

“Do you regret it?”

“I’m reminded of your word
stupidly
just now.”

“That’s a yes?”

Her face began to cool. “My ex-husband tried to kill me. My choice in men isn’t very noteworthy.”

“Ford is nothing like your ex-husband the wife-beater.”

She knew that. “I just don’t think I’m ready to trust myself to make smart decisions yet.” Or Ford. Could she trust him to be the man she needed? Could she trust him at all in love?

“I didn’t think of it that way.” Lacy took a moment. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe you should stay away from Ford for a while. He’s got a lot of baggage. He’s a good man, and I can see he’s very attracted to you, but…”

“But what?”

“Maybe he isn’t so good for you right now.”

“Why? Because of the way he lost his family?”

“Oh, I’m sure that’s affected him plenty. But…Gemma…he also lost his wife a while back. She died. Five years ago.”

Gemma felt a chill of dread flood her, so distressing that she all but stopped breathing. “She died?”

“She was only twenty-two. She died during childbirth.”

“The baby?”

“Died with her.” Sympathy for Gemma and sadness over the lost infant came through her eyes.

Ford had lost his wife and unborn child. After losing his family to murder. A murder he’d survived. She’d expected some kind of heartache in association with a woman, his wife, but she’d never have guessed it was this tragic. A divorce, sure, but death during childbirth? He hadn’t lost only his wife, he’d lost a baby as well.

“They would have had a baby boy. It’s so sad, isn’t it?”

Beyond sad. Gemma’s heart broke for him. And then she felt her guard go up. That was too much drama for her to deal with. How could she ever feel secure with a man like that? He might not beat her, but the feelings he harbored for the wife and son he’d lost would be too much for her to go up against. Her battered self-esteem wouldn’t be able to compete.

* * *

Ford woke up to the sound of his cell phone going off. Groaning, he rolled over and slid it out of its case. Bo Fargo. At 1:00 a.m.

“Yeah.”

“We’ve got a problem.”

He swung his legs over the side of Gemma’s guest-room bed.

“Meet me over at the Stillwater Inn. We found Jed Johnson. He was shot in his room tonight.”

“He’s dead?” Ford stood up and reached for his jeans.

“They don’t get any deader. Hurry. I don’t want to be out here all night.”

While his mind ran away with questions, he dressed and went into the living room, glancing up the stairs. At least he wouldn’t have to worry about Gemma while he was gone. Jed was dead.

He had enough to worry about with her. Sleeping with her had him in knots. He felt obligated now. What should he do? Keep seeing her? The idea twisted him into greater knots. He wanted her too much. Every time he looked at her he wanted her. Everything about her electrified his male instincts to the point where he wasn’t sure he could control it. That put this whole mess into a territory where he wasn’t comfortable. He needed a way out. An escape. But he also didn’t want to hurt Gemma.

She seemed to be struggling with the same affliction. When he’d picked her up from the coffee shop, she’d been quiet and distant. He’d asked if she was all right and she’d said yes, but there was tension between them now. Was she thinking about what happened on the stairs? Did she regret it? Part of him hoped so. Another warned that she could be upset over the way he was reacting. And damn if that didn’t make him want to run even faster.

Finding his keys, he adjusted his gun and made sure he had his cell phone. Heading for the door, he stopped when it opened and Gemma appeared. She froze in the doorway. He glanced back at the stairs. He hadn’t even heard her leave. He faced her again. Had she sneaked outside? What was she doing at this time of night?

“What are you doing up?” she asked.

“I could ask you the same question.” Jed was dead…

“I couldn’t sleep.” Her eyes lowered as she closed the front door, guilt or discomfort of some kind radiating in her body language. He’d either caught her doing something she didn’t want him to know about or the sex they’d had was still creating tension.

“Where were you?”

“I lost my bracelet. I thought maybe I lost it between the car and the house.”

“You were looking for your bracelet…at 1:00 a.m.?”

“I…I couldn’t sleep.”

What the hell? Where had she gone? “Why not?”

She rubbed her hands over her jeans, a nervous gesture. She wasn’t even in her pjs. He looked closer. She wasn’t dirty or disheveled. She was fully dressed…at one in the morning.

“No reason. Just couldn’t sleep.”

She was lying.

He stared at her.

Now she fidgeted with her hands, crumbling beneath his steady gaze. Signs of the victim in her, insecurity as the result of abuse, or was it guilt?