Last Song (Chasing Cross Book Five) (A Brothers of Rock Novel) (rockstar contemporary romance) (14 page)

But the dog was right.

Molly barked again.

Rick looked at Sarah
again and they both started to laugh at the same time.

“Shit,” Sarah said.

“Shit,” Rick whispered.

He slowly slid his hand
down from Sarah’s breast and took his other hand from her pants. He held her
waist and backed up enough to give his lower half a chance to calm down, if it
were at all possible.

“Your dog is too smart
for her own good,” Rick said.

“Too smart for our own
good,” Sarah said as she slid off the table.

“So this is wrong?”

“I didn’t say that,”
Sarah said. “This is...”

Rick tried to find the
word to finish Sarah’s sentence, but there wasn’t one. What she said was the
truth.

This is.

And that meant reality,
the moment, everything happening between them and everything happening outside
and miles away.

The moment had come and
gone, but when Rick said he needed to get home and shower, two things happened.
First, he pictured Sarah naked. He was a man, after all, and after what just
happened between them, the notion of sex would be the first thing on his mind
more than normal. Second, he couldn’t leave without kissing her. No way. That
was no longer an option. They didn’t have to date, they didn’t have to fall in
love, but Rick couldn’t leave her house without kissing her.

The problem with kissing,
Rick found out right then, was that when you kissed the right person, it was
never just one kiss. In a matter of seconds, Sarah’s hands were tangled in
Rick’s hair. Rick held her by the hips, pinning her against the wall separating
the dining room and kitchen. And once again, it was Molly, the golden
retriever, who served as the voice of reason. A quick bark ended the steamy
scene for a second time. And this time Rick left.

The second the door shut,
he whispered, “Damn dog.”

**

The cold water pounded
against Rick’s body. It wasn’t the first time he’d taken a cold shower in his
life, but it was certainly the first time he did so to cool off thanks to a
woman. The water was icy, his body shivered, an intense warmth still lingered.
It wasn’t going to go away.

Rick knew his life had
been changing from the second he stepped off the tour bus and called a cab to
get the hell away from the band. He’d done so with a heavy heart and his mind
racing with booze. Now he was clear headed but still felt drunk. Only the drunk
feeling wasn’t a thick mask weighing him down.

This feeling was great.

Rick finally added some
warm water and took a real shower. He washed away the run, but he also washed
away Sarah. He licked his lips and tasted water, but he wanted to taste Sarah.

After the shower, Rick
dressed and found himself standing in his kitchen. He casually looked across
the alley to Sarah’s house. If Sarah had her curtains open, he’d be able to see
the table. To see the piano. To see it all like a still framed memory.

Rick’s heart raced.

His opportunity to step
out of reality, out of Chasing Cross, had taken him someplace else that was
perhaps even more real, because now it wasn’t just his heart at stake... there
were two hearts.

Three, if you counted the
damn dog.

As Rick leaned over the
sink, he laughed and shook his head. He then gazed upon the garage detached
from the house he bought. Under other circumstances he’d probably be in that
garage with the rest of the guys who only want to jam out, play a show once a
week, and spend the rest of the time stuck between bed sheets and bottles. It
sounded fun, but Rick wondered if that time had come and gone... like years
ago. He swore for a second that he saw Sarah walking around her house. Just the
thought of her made his body go wild. She had to have taken a shown by now.
Rick pictured the water beating on her body... her beautiful naked body...

Rick pushed off the sink
and left the kitchen.

There was only one other
thing bothering him. One other thing eating at his mind.

He found his cell phone
and dialed a number... and waited.

The voice on the other
end picked up.

“Peter, it’s me. It’s
time to talk.”

(16)

It was hot outside and
Johnnie didn’t get much sleep the night before. They were meeting Rick that
morning and it figured that Rick would all of a sudden want to talk on the day of
a show, and in Texas. Maybe Rick missed flying and traveling and that’s why he
picked it that way. However, what mattered was what Rick’s decision would be.

Johnnie sat on the quiet
tour bus and watched the sun rise. He watched the colors of the new day bleed as
they pulled the sun up. Chris was the next person to wake up, well after the
sun was up. He asked Johnnie if there was coffee. There wasn’t. Chris decided
to give Peter a call and have him go get coffee for the band. That’s when it
hit Johnnie that they were all drinking coffee in the morning now to wake up.
Ten years ago they’d be going to bed at this time. But that was then. That’s
the only way to say it. They couldn’t live ten years in the past. For a band
that stood the test of time, Chasing Cross did a hell of a job keeping their
dedicated fans happy while bringing in new fans all the time. It wasn’t based
on image or a wild rock n’ roll lifestyle. It was based on the music they wrote
and the shows they played and the shows were amazing. With Luke, it was like a
whole new life in the shows. To see the talent and to feel the excitement
swarming around ate at Johnnie because he wondered if Rick decided to come
back, what would the reception be like?

Chris sat across from
Johnnie and stared at him.

“Slept like shit,” Chris
said.

“Yeah. Me too.”

“What are we going to
do?”

“I don’t think it’s up to
us,” Johnnie said.

The conversation ended
there as they waited for their coffee. By the time Peter came onto the tour
bus, the rest of the band was awake. Danny and Davey sat across from each other
at another table. The tension in the bus was thick and having Peter there only
added to it. He carried a holder with four coffees and a bag in the middle full
of food. The band tore apart the food and ate. Then they sipped coffee and all
sat, avoiding eye contact as though they were mad at each other.

“I highly suggest at the
very least you let me be there,” Peter said.

“No,” Johnnie said.

“Why not? You don’t know
what he’s going to do. Who he’s going to bring.”

“Who would he bring?”
Chris asked.

“What if he shows up with
a lawyer?”

“Then we walk away,”
Johnnie said. “This is a band situation.”

“And I’m part of the
band,” Peter said. “A big freaking part of it.”

“Peter, please,” Johnnie
said. “Have you seen the reaction for Luke?”

“I see it every night,”
Peter said. “I wish we could offer that kid any amount of money he wants to get
him to leave that other band.”

“You would,” Chris said.

“He probably tried,”
Danny said.

“Luke wouldn’t do that,”
Johnnie said. “Not for money. I’m sure Fallen Tuesday is cleaning up just fine.
Not that money matters to them.”

“Never mattered to Rick,”
Chris said.

“That’s part of the
problem,” Johnnie said. “We have to have a way to handle this. If he says he
quits for good. If he says he wants to join the tour again. We need to cover
our bases.”

“That’s hard to do,”
Davey said. “This isn’t like meeting with a record company. This is our...
brother.”

“I know,” Johnnie said.
“I know.”

“Can I be sincere for a
second?” Peter asked.

“Is it going to snow in
Texas?” Danny asked.

The band chuckled for a
few seconds. Peter pulled at his tie and crouched down. The sweat glistened off
his forehead.

“I support whatever
decision is made here,” Peter said. “There is no real right or wrong answer.”

“I disagree,” Johnnie
said. “I saw something... with Luke...”

“What happened?” Chris
asked.

“Our last show,” Johnnie
said. “I wanted to go thank him for saving our ass again and again and to check
on him. I mean, we’re in Texas now. With this same set up. This was supposed to
be a quick fix, but now it’s been weeks on top of weeks. Well, I saw Luke
hunched over a sink with his head back and his eyes shut. He was holding his
neck, massaging it. He looked in pain. Uncomfortable. I don’t know. Something was
off.”

“Did you say anything?”
Chris asked.

“No. I didn’t want to
scare him, but I hope this two performance thing isn’t hurting him. It’s not
fair.”

“He’s getting paid for
it,” Peter said.

“So much for sincere I
guess,” Davey said.

Danny flicked his coffee cup
and let out a sigh. “Bottom line is that today is going to suck no matter what.
If Rick wants to come back, what do we do? Just open our arms? Just assume he’s
going to jump back on stage and bring the intensity that Luke does?”

“Can I finish?” Peter asked.
“I mean, I am the band manager here, right?”

“By all means,” Johnnie
said as he raised his hands in the air.

“As I was saying,” Peter
said. “I support anything you guys decide to do. We only have one more small
leg of this tour and it’s done. If you want to let Rick back in to finish it
off and give the fans and media the answer they want, do it. If you want to
keep him off until the next one, do it. The decision on his part has to come
soon. You’re set to hit the studio soon. It’s pretty damn obvious we can’t take
Luke into the studio. If this gets into the legal stuff, then so be it. I won’t
go for anyone’s throat, out of respect for the band. For you guys remaining
here. The easiest thing would be to split it all up so Rick gets one fifth. Of
course you guys can fight it out.”

“Fight what?” Danny
asked.

“Well, I mean, who
brought the most to the band, right? Is writing guitar solos harder than
drumbeats? Is singing harder on the body than drumming? Would Johnnie be more
recognized than Rick? All that could change how much you each get as a cut in
the band.”

Johnnie heard the words
and knew what they meant. Chasing Cross had slipped its way into a brand and a
company. It wasn’t just about music and maybe that helped to drive Rick away.
Just hearing Peter talk about who was worth what in the band made his stomach
turn. They all didn’t start out to be like this, did they? To try and decide if
Johnnie’s lyrics were worth more than Rick’s drumming seemed like the fuel to
pit everyone against each other.

“I think that’s all horse
shit,” Davey said. “The five of us got together and formed a band.”

“I agree,” Danny said.

“Me too,” Chris said.

All eyes went to Johnnie.
Including Peter’s.

“If you think for a
second I would sue our drummer because his
value
should be less... No. That’s not who we are. No.”

“Okay,” Peter said. “I’m
not saying to do anything. I’m just offering my support. If you guys feel you
need me or a lawyer, then call me. Try to stay out of trouble.”

“That’s sort of
impossible with us,” Chris said.

He smiled and everyone
else shook their heads. They all knew Texas was where he met Becky, the woman
who would end up flying to Las Vegas and marrying Chris on a whim. But it
worked out for Chris, so what did it matter?

Peter left the bus and
the rest of the morning the band spent getting dressed, cleaning themselves up,
trying to kill time while waiting for Rick to call them.

When the call came, it
felt like time had frozen. Rick was in Texas and ready to meet the band. They
agreed on a small restaurant way outside San Antonio that would hopefully be
secluded. Rick had a rental car and for some reason that bothered the hell out
of Johnnie as he and the rest of Chasing Cross climbed into a black car, paid
to take them anywhere they wanted to go.

Johnnie saw Rick sitting
at a table near a window. He wasn’t sure how to feel but he opened the door
before the driver could stop the car. Nobody objected and one by one the band
climbed from the car and went into the restaurant. The waitresses were in
complete shock. The woman who sat the band looked nervous enough to pass out.
Johnnie told her there wouldn’t be need for menus but he’d make sure everyone
was taken care of.

Rick stood from his side
of the booth and faced the band. The band he skipped out on. The band he had
been part of for over ten years. The band he had made millions with. The band that
made him a household name and a rockstar. The biggest of all dreams coming
true.

“Long time no see,” Rick
said.

The awkwardness built off
itself as they all sat. Danny and Davey pulled up chairs to the table, leaving
Rick on his side of the booth alone.

Of course, everyone
looked to Johnnie to start if off.

“Well,” Johnnie said, “I
guess the first thing... uh... Rick, how are you feeling? Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” Rick said. “I’m
fine. I heard on the radio and read online a lot of people thought I was in
rehab or in trouble.”

“It’s the first thing
anyone would assume,” Chris said.

“Well, it was my nature,
right? I mean, if there was one of us who would probably end up dead...”

“Good point,” Danny said.

Johnnie looked at his
little brother and wanted to say something, but why bother? What did it matter?
They had their own right to feel how they felt. It wasn’t Johnnie’s job to
police feelings.

“You called us here,”
Johnnie said.

“Yeah, I did. I wanted to
see where everything stands. I saw you have a new drummer.”

“Fill in,” Davey said.
“Fill in. You know that, Rick. What is this? Are you in or out?”

“That’s the easiest
question,” Johnnie said.

“I guess it is,” Rick
said. “But do you guys understand what happened to me?”

“No,” Chris said. “Sorry,
man, but no. So explain it. Please.”

“It was dark,” Rick said.
“Okay? Dark. The touring. The schedules. The black cars picking us up. The non
stop nonsense of it all. It felt like the music was the least anyone’s concern.”

“That’s never true,”
Johnnie said. “We have our hearts and soul into the music. You know that.”

“I’m not saying we all
don’t,” Rick said. “But it’s processed like we’re puppets. I mean... you wake
up and have the day spelled out for you. Right down to the last drumbeat.”

Rick looked at the entire
band. Johnnie saw the looks being shared. Rick may have been wrong, but he was
on to something here. Then it hit Johnnie...

“How are the shows now?”
Rick asked. “Honestly.”

Danny looked at Chris.
Chris looked at Johnnie.

“They’re amazing,”
Johnnie said. “I mean, just amazing.”

“The energy,” Chris said.

“The passion,” Dany
whispered.

“It’s like the last show
we’re ever going to play,” Davey added.

“Maybe because that’s
getting closer to being true,” Johnnie said. “Luke isn’t filling in forever.”

“Just wait a second
here,” Rick said. “Why do you think the shows are so much better? Because
they’re different. It’s not planned out, not now at least, but if you stuck it
out another month or so it would become stale.”

“Okay, Rick,” Johnnie
said. “What do you want us to do? Leave the tour? Come to your place and play
in a garage?”

Rick laughed. “I’m not
saying that. What I’m saying is, why can’t we have fun and go out there and
just play a damn show. If a fan calls out a song, let’s play it. If a fan has a
sign, read it.”

“Coming from the guy who
got sick of fans,” Chris said.

“No. I never said that,
Chris. I got sick of Peter and the higher ups looking at us like a brand.”

There was that word
again...
brand
...
Johnnie hated that word. It’s what Chasing Cross had become.

“You walked away,” Davey
said. “You just stood up and walked away from us. Not Peter. Us. Then you
ignored us. We were left hanging...”

“I’m sorry about that,”
Rick said. “I hid in an apartment and tried to drink myself to death. It was
filthy, man. Then I woke up and realized I was the only one partying. So I
decided to get a bigger place. With a garage. I needed to do something else. I
bought a house and called some old friends and we started jamming.”

“We all saw the videos,”
Danny said. “Rick from Chasing Cross playing dive bars.”

“That didn’t help us
much,” Johnnie said. “We’ve been fielding questions and trying our hardest to
make sure you didn’t end up as the asshole...”

“Which you were and are,”
Davey said.

“Okay,” Rick said,
nodding. “I’ll accept that. But where are we going? I come up with an idea to
jam in a garage and next thing you know we’re going to record a new album and
sell it.”

“That’s wrong to give our
fans new music?” Johnnie asked.

“I’m not sure. I just
wanted a break for a second.”

“I hope you found what
you wanted,” Davey said as he stood.

It seemed the meeting was
over.

**

Rick had found what he
wanted. He just wasn’t sure if it was the rest of the band’s business to know
about Sarah. But as he watched them all stand, one by one, their arms crossed,
staring down at him, Rick finally understood the implications of everything
he’d done. He didn’t feel right about it but that didn’t mean he felt wrong
either.

“Look,” he said, “I had a
problem brewing. Okay? It wasn’t that long ago that I almost died because of
drinking. Even then I felt dead. I was on the sidelines with a broken arm,
watching you guys play shows. When I came back, it just felt different. I felt
like I was jumping right back into it all. But I haven’t touched a drink in
weeks. I swear on that.”

“That’s good to hear,”
Johnnie said.

“Yeah, it is,” Chris
said.

“I didn’t quit the band,
I quit the shit around the band. I’ll forever be Chasing Cross’s drummer. It
just depended on what you guys want me to do with it.”