Kya & Xavier: It's Always Been You (Life As We Know It Book 1) (2 page)

“Umm excuse you, what are you doing?” I asked although I
already knew the answer. As usual he had no intentions to leave anytime soon.
No surprise there. I knew that was his plan the second that I saw him standing
in my doorway. The two of us had repeated this scenario too many times before.
Xavier showed up late at night got comfortable and settled in for an overnight
stay. Which by the way would put my parents in an early grave if they knew
anything about it.

I was far from a virgin because Xavier and I had crossed that
bridge years ago but as far as my parents were concerned their philosophy was out
of site out of mind. I was totally okay with that as long as it kept them from
asking me questions that I knew neither of them wanted to know the answers to.
Especially my dad.
Oh god he would die.

Most of the time nights like these had often led to sex but
for the past month or so it was mostly just about late night conversations and
reruns of our favorite shows. I could tell that he missed being around me just
as much as I missed being around him but that stupid male ego wouldn’t let him
admit it. I can’t say it really bothered me though because it made it a lot easier
to keep things between us a little more defined.
If that was even possible
. No matter what we had gone through in
the past all and all he was my best friend and I couldn’t imagine him not being
around as much as he was.

“Can I chill for a minute?” He asked rhetorically because I
knew that he wasn’t actually waiting for my approval.

“Sounds like you've got somewhere else to be.” I said
referring to his call to see if he was going to release any details.

“Let me worry about that and it doesn’t matter because you
know you want me to stay.” He was right I did but I wasn’t going to tell him
that so instead I just said, “Not with you smelling like a club.”

“Is my stuff still in here?” Xavier asked as he opened my
closet door.

“It’s up there.” I pointed to a navy duffle bag that I kept
for him. Inside were clothes that he had left in my room over time.

“You want me to shower?” He asked as he reached for the bag.

“If you're staying then yes. You're not laying in my bed smelling
like that.”

He started digging through the bag and pulled out a pair of basketball
shorts and a ch pair of boxer briefs with a thick burgundy waist band.

“Where’s my OKC shirt?”

“It’s in my drawer.”

“So I guess that means you did miss me.” He said with a
smirk.

“No it means I was too lazy to put it with the rest of your
stuff so it ended up in my drawer.”

“Yeah whatever.” He said and laughed. “You had one of those
nights where you missed me but you were too stubborn to call so you just slept
in my shirt. I know you.”

Xavier wasn’t far off from the truth but I had too much pride
to admit it so instead I just fired back with, “You’re really feeling
yourself.”

He just laughed arrogantly picked up his clothes and tossed
them over his shoulder.

“You can join me if you want.”
 
He said on his way to the bathroom without
turning to look back at me.

“Nah, I’ll let you have that.”

A few minutes later the door to the bathroom shut. When I
could hear the water running I reached under my covers and searched for my cellphone.
No luck so I lifted the comforter and threw it back to get a better look. After
I still couldn’t locate it I pulled the pillows from behind me and finally found
it. After I shoved the pillows behind my back again I immediately called my
best friend Toni.

“Sup Tee you busy?”

“Just watching a movie with Ant what’s up and why are you
whispering?” She asked.

“Zay is here. He’s in the shower and you’re spending an awful
lot of time over there for Ant to just be a situation.”

“So much for you not going there anymore and Ant’s still just
a situation. Girl I can’t be tying myself down with titles. You know I’m
looking for my future husband.”

“I’m not going there!” I insisted defensively. I hated that
she knew me so well. “He just showed up like he always does and that situation
thinks you’re committed to him. Is he right there with you?”

“No, he’s in hall talking to one of his boys and sweetie, if
he’s in your bed, you will be going there so stop frontin’ like you’re not
getting it in tonight and let me worry about Ant.”

“Trust me when I say the only thing I’ll be getting in
tonight is a good night’s sleep. You should have more faith in me.”

“I have all the faith in the world but there are two things
that I’m certain of and that is one, you have no control filters when it comes
to Zay and two, he knows that even more than I do.”

“Girl I know, but we are friends right now, that's it and he
has a girl.”

“He has a girl and yet he still manages to spend more time in
our dorm than hers.”

“Just friends Toni. That's it, just friends.” I said, even
though I knew that there was no point in trying to convince her.

“How about you tell that lie to somebody who might believe
it. I know you better than you know yourself most of the time and what I know
for certain is that you and Zay are more than just friends no matter how many
times you say it. You can’t go through all the stuff that you’ve been through and
walk away just friends. So stop pretending it’s that easy. If we’re being real,
since our freshman year he has literally been the only guy in your life. Well
aside from a few failed attempts at moving on. So basically your life is on
hold because you’re always there when he needs you and yet he has a so called ‘
girlfriend’
it’s not fair Ky. I love Zay
but you can’t keep letting him do that to you. He holds on just enough to keep
you around but never enough to be what you need. It’s getting old Ky. It really
is.”

I sat there silently processing what Toni had just said. The
way it all just came flowing out made me think that it had been sitting on her
mind for a while now. The words cut deep because I knew that she was right. I
just didn’t know how to break free and to be perfectly honest I didn’t know if
I really wanted to. Xavier had been a permanent fixture in my life since our
freshman year of high school and now that I was a sophomore in college not much
had changed. He floated in and out of my life whenever he wanted to and I couldn’t
blame anybody but myself because I let him.

“Ky you there?” Toni asked softly. I think she must have
realized that she had probably hurt my feelings with her rant. I was used to it
though because she always spoke her mind. With her, what came up came out and I
had to respect that even if I didn’t always like it.

“Yeah, I’m here but I have to go. I’ll see you when you get
home tomorrow.” I ended the call and stared at my phone.

“Who was that?”

Xavier had finished his shower and was standing next to my
bed.

“Toni.” Was all I said.

“You okay?” He asked.

“Yeah why?”

“I don't know you just have a strange look on your face.”

“I’m fine.”

“Ky, really? What's up?”

I thought about it for a second and then decided to keep my
thoughts to myself. I wasn't really in the mood to have another one of our
heart to hearts that ended in an argument and weeks of us not speaking.

“I'm good.” I smiled but I knew him well enough to know that
he didn’t believe me so I changed the subject. “You have a game tomorrow, don’t
you have curfew? Your coach is going to kill you if you're not back in time.”

“So now you're worried about me? When I got here you were
being all shady and trying put me out.”

“I,” I paused briefly for dramatic effects and then pointed
at myself, “am definitely not shady and unlike you I'm a good friend so I'm
always worried about you.”

“So I'm not good to you?” He gently tugged on my hair before
he pulled the towel he was using from around his shoulders and dropped it and
his t-shirt into laundry bag that was hanging on my closet door. Xavier folded
his jeans across the back of my computer chair before he picked up his phone
and checked few notifications with his back to me. I watched as every motion he
made no matter how small caused the muscles in his arms and back to flex
showing off years of conditioning and discipline.

“All I'm saying is that I'm a better friend than you.” I said.

He laid his phone back on my desk and then said, “Nah but
I'll let you keep thinking that.” His basketball shorts hung low around his
waist exposing the waist band of his boxer briefs and the perfect V sculpted
out of muscles that started at his abs and disappeared under his shorts.
Too darn sexy for your own good.

“Because you know it's true.” I said looking away so that he
didn’t see me focusing on his body.

Xavier walked out of my bedroom and entered into our shared area
or what you could call our mini living room/kitchen. Our dorm was a two bedroom
suite so Toni and I had our own bedrooms and bathrooms. We shared a common area
which housed a mini kitchen, two small sofas, a flat screen TV purchased by my family,
two stools and table. He pulled open the refrigerator which was on my side of
the dorm so his back was to me. He stood there for a minute before grabbed a soda,
shut the door and walked back into my room.

“You need a bigger bed.” He said before he twisted the cap
off the soda he was holding, turned it up and then closed it again.

“Don’t you have a full sized bed? How about you just stay in
your own dorm.” I said sarcastically.

“How about you would miss me too much if I did.”

He flipped the switch on my wall to turn on my ceiling fan
before he laid down next to me with his back against my body pillow that was
currently shoved up against the wall and then reached over me to pick up the
remote.

“It’s 60 degrees outside and you’re turning on a fan.” I said
asked and then rolled my eyes.

“It’s hot in here.”
I
knew he was going to say that.

“So what about your curfew?” I asked.

I remembered a few weeks ago when Xavier told me that he
didn't get to start in a rival home game because he missed curfew after several
warnings from his coach. Xavier didn't function well with rules. His coach made
him sit out the entire first half and of course he didn't take it very well. His
bad attitude emerged which lead to several personal fouls including a technical
for arguing with the referees. The only reason why the coach allowed him to
finish the game was because he didn't want to lose to their rival and he needed
Xavier on the court in order to win. He was allowed to finish the game but paid
for it at the next practice with an hour of running sprints.

“Johnny’s in town and he thinks I’m with him.”

“He believed that?” I asked eyebrows raised and straight
faced.

“Yeah because he came by the school today. So coach thinks
we're bonding.” His words were sarcastic and lacking emotion.

“How is he? Did he have deliveries in town?” I asked figuring
that his job would be the only reason why Johnny would take the time to show up
and try to see him. He was a truck driver and mostly did long haul but
occasionally did short distances that brought him near us from time to time. Their
relationship was complicated to say the least so I knew that he would never
come in town just to see Xavier.

“Still a drunk and still and asshole.”

“Oh.” I said softly.

“I'm good Ky. Don't worry about me and you darn sure don't
need to waste any energy worrying about him.”

“I’m not.”

I thought about all the nights that I had risked my life and
more so his knowing that my parents would have killed us both if they had known
that our house was his refuge. I couldn’t even count the number of nights long
after they had gone to bed that Xavier had climbed through my window because of
Johnny. Sneaking him in my room after he had shown up angry and bruised both
physically and mentally from being at war with Johnny probably wasn’t the most
responsible thing to do but it was what he needed and that’s all that really
mattered. We would stay up all night talking about anything but what he was
trying to escape until it was safe for him to sneak back into the war zone he
called home. I had never really hated any one in my life before but I was sure
that hated Johnny for how he treated Xavier.

“Are you coming tomorrow?” He asked I’m sure in an effort to
change the subject.

“Not sure, I have a paper due and I need to study for my Chem
test.” Xavier had really been pressing the issue about me coming to his games
lately but I wasn’t really interested in seeing him with another girl so I
always found an excuse not to go.

I pulled the covers back and stood up so that I could remove
my fleece pants leaving me in a pair of cardinal red yoga shorts. I flipped the
switch to turn off the lights over my desk which left the dim
 
glow coming from the Christmas lights that
lined my ceiling and what little light my flat screen provided. I walked over to
my bedroom door, shut and locked it before I placed my foot on my step stool
and climbed back into my bed.