Kiss This (47 page)

Teague released a breath of air. “Part of
why I kept it a secret is kind of fucked up,” he admitted.

She looked at him curiously. “What do you
mean? Like…you loved her, despite what she did?” Camryn asked
softly.

“Fuck no, I hated her guts,” he answered
instantly. “It was about Chase. At first I had this farfetched idea
that she would change her mind and just let me raise him. I knew it
was unlikely but I had hope. I would have taken the secret to my
grave, just to be Chase’s dad again. The day he was born… I
couldn’t get that day out of my head; the day I thought my son came
into the world. I loved him so much I was willing to play nice. I
thought if I gave her time and space and kept the secret, she would
decide to let me have that role again. I hated being at her mercy,
but it was all I had. I was the one lied to and I was
still
subjected to their decisions; two people that didn’t even deserve
him.”

He sighed and shook his head as Camryn
squeezed his hand again to show her support.

“Max’s selfish actions truly pissed me off,”
he added. “I couldn’t believe how self-centered he became just to
save face for his career. We used to be friends, but he’s just
gotten so much like my dad I could hardly be around him even before
this happened. But I didn’t want Chase to be affected by any of
this down the road. I didn’t want the media to find out and make a
huge spectacle of his life because of who his father is. Maybe I
was just prolonging the inevitable, but I felt it was the only
option I had. Chase is an innocent kid that should be protected by
the grownups around him; not a victim of their shitty choices. So
yeah, I kept the secret, but it was for Chase. Not for any other
reason.”

Camryn smiled and said, “Teague, if it makes
any difference, I think you made the best choice you could. I don’t
really know if there’s a ‘right’ choice.”

“Chase was my only priority. He still is. I
chose to keep the secret and I’ll still keep the secret for now
because I don’t want to be the one to make things worse. The
grownups need to get their shit together first. I just want them to
figure this out without the rest of the world interfering. I’m
keeping the fucking secret because I want them to do the right
thing on their own.” He sighed and shook his head. “Does that even
make sense?”

“Absolutely,” Camryn nodded. “Teague, you’ve
done what most people wouldn’t be able to do. You’ve put someone
else before yourself, even with how bad it’s made you look or how
much it has hurt you. That is the ultimate sacrifice, baby. You
have endured this to give people a chance to do the right thing
when it would have been easier to expose everyone.”

“Oh I was tempted,” he chuckled bitterly.
“Trust me, I felt vengeful plenty of times.”

“I can understand that. But you focused on
Chase instead.”

“After I wallowed in self-pity for a while.
I didn’t make the best decisions back then. I started smoking
again, got carried away with alcohol for a couple of months… I
didn’t plan on being up north that long. I hoped that things would
go to shit for Kate and she’d realize she messed up by cutting me
off like that. She went back to Las Vegas and wouldn’t talk to me.
She wouldn’t even let me see Chase. I needed time away, somewhere
new. I couldn’t even imagine my life turning around anytime soon
but…”

Teague took a deep breath and closed his
eyes for a moment. When he opened them, Camryn could see an
immediate change come over him. The tropical storm had ceased and
the waters were calm.

“Ten months later I met you,” he barely
whispered.

Chapter Forty-One

Teague tucked a strand of hair behind
Camryn’s ear and softly touched her face. He took another deep
breath as the breeze blew her scent into his system, calming him
with a sense of purpose and reassuring him with the future that he
wanted.

“You came into my life and everything seemed
to change,” he said softly, studying her closely. “You were the
hope that I needed; the person that was meant to show me there were
better things in life. I felt things for you that I never felt
before, Camryn. Maybe I had to break like that to understand what
it was that I needed, but I didn’t want to look back again. I just
wanted to take the lesson learned and make something good of it. I
love you. So much. You’ve made me a better person, and even though
I don’t like to think about it, the mess with Kate made me a better
person for
you
. I’m not so sure the previous Teague would
have won you over,” he partially smiled.

She chuckled and said, “He was one of those
cocky assholes that I might’ve decked.”

“Maybe,” he laughed. God, it felt so good to
get all of that off his chest. He still had a lot to face, and
nothing was resolved with Max either, but moving forward was all he
wanted to do at this point and he couldn’t do it without Camryn’s
trust.

“So answer me one more thing and we can put
this behind us,” she said softly.

His heart pounded in his chest because of
the serious expression on her face. “Okay. I’ll answer anything you
ask.”

“Have you been seeing Kate lately?”

“Hell no, not in that way,” he said quickly,
scooting closer to her. He linked his hands around her waist and
shook his head. “I will never give her any part of me, not even as
a friend. But she came to LA and finally let me see Chase again.
I’ve only seen her three times since I’ve been back. It’s always in
public, though. She kept trying to get me to come to her hotel but
I refused.”

Camryn narrowed her eyes. “So help me God,
if she’s trying to get you back after what she did…”

“There’s no way in hell, Camryn. I barely
talk to her when I see Chase.”

Camryn released a slow breath of air.
“So…what’s it going to be like for you and Chase in the
future?”

He shook his head with a frown. “I don’t
know,” he answered honestly. “That’s why I didn’t feel it was
necessary to tell you yet. I didn’t know what to even say about it.
She introduced me to him by my first name, which was… God, that
killed me,” he sighed, shaking his head. “I want to be around Chase
but…I can’t be around Kate. I don’t even want to look at her. I
spent almost a year being shut out of his life, and then she
decides to come to town and change that. I want nothing to do with
her and I don’t feel sorry for her and her problems with my
brother, but I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel when it comes to
Chase.”

He looked at Camryn, hoping for some
insight.

“I don’t either,” she shrugged
sympathetically. “You love him and care about his wellbeing; that’s
about all you can do for now. When does Max turn twenty-six?”

“March 15
^th
.”

“And do you think he’s going to step
up?”

Teague took a moment to measure his
response. “Not by choice, but because he has to. I think Kate will
have him by the balls if he doesn’t. He knows that. I wish they
could resolve this with Chase in mind and not a damn legal
agreement. Right now Max is dying for a piece of my dad’s company
and it’ll be another month before that happens. But now he’s
worried about
you
,” he smiled.

“Because he thought I already knew his dirty
little secret? Ha. Maybe I should make him piss his pants for a
while.”

Teague laughed at the prospect of it. “That
would be kind of fun. But I’d rather you not be involved,
sweetheart. Dealing with my family isn’t pretty. Just let Max
trudge through this on his own. He’ll have my dad to deal with if
he ever finds out how long Max has known about Chase. But even if
Max does claim Chase, it doesn’t mean he’s going to be a dad to
him.”

“That breaks my heart.”

“I know. Mine too. I’m just his uncle, but
I’ll be there for him if he needs me.”

“Teague, you are not second best. And I have
no doubt that when Chase grows up, he’ll see what kind of person
you are and want you in his life.” She paused to wait for a
response, but he was too desolate to offer one. Finally she asked,
“Is Kate a good mom?”

With a nod he answered, “Yeah, she takes
care of him, I guess. But what about in the long run when Chase
gets older? God, I feel like I’m looking at my own life when I was
that age,” he groaned. “I was conceived in a lie as well, and I
don’t know what circumstances played the biggest role, but I never
felt like I belonged
anywhere
. I never felt like my dad took
me in because he
wanted
to. And yeah, I turned out to be
trouble—whether it was naturally a part of me or I was a product of
my environment, I have no clue. But I don’t want to watch Chase go
through the same thing.”

She sighed and placed her hand lovingly
against his cheek. “Can I be very candid with you?”

He leaned his face against her hand and then
softly kissed it before holding it to his chest. “Please.”

“You are incredible, Teague. But when I
first met you, I was cautious. You know why, but it wasn’t entirely
because of losing Zach. I was cautious just because you were a
guy
. I’ve been around so many people over the last two
years, but there hasn’t been anyone like you. I do believe in
meeting the right person at the right time, and I know that was the
case with us. It took us a while to trust each other, but what
we’ve built with one another is so strong right now and it’s only
going to get stronger.”

“I agree one hundred percent,” Teague
nodded. “I know I’ll be a stupid ass on more than one occasion, but
as long as you let me kiss you goodnight each and every time I
climb into bed next to you—no matter how upset you are with me—I
promise it will make me a better man for you.”

“Oh Teague,” she laughed softly.

“And then you know I’ll use my euphoric
whisper voice and you’ll be such a goner you won’t even remember
what we were fighting about in the first place.”

“Very true.”

“So we have a deal? No matter how pissed you
are with me, you always let me kiss you goodnight, Camryn.
Always.”

She thought for a moment and then slowly
nodded her head. “Deal. But that’s the only thing I’m agreeing to.
A kiss goodnight. The panty-melting whispers will have to be taken
into consideration one grovel at a time.”

“Normally I’d have this smug smile on my
face because my ego would totally be disputing that, but
unfortunately…I know you’re right.”

When Camryn laughed, he wanted to kiss her
senseless. Her laugh did inexplicable things to him, and it came
from those beautiful lips that he couldn’t get enough of. He leaned
forward, but Camryn sighed and said, “Teague, let me just say that
I’m so sorry for everything that happened with Chase. I can’t even
imagine how much you’ve been through. Actually I can because what
happened to you was basically like losing a child. I know what it’s
like to lose someone—my dad, and then Zach—so I understand why
you’ve kept this bottled up like you have. I did the same thing,
and I would go into Tim’s gym and beat the shit out of things.”

Teague smiled and said, “And also the cocky
pride of the male species.”

“Yes,” she agreed with an embarrassed smile.
“I did do that. I didn’t want to love again. I didn’t want to lose
again. I didn’t want anyone to be good enough to take Zach’s
place.”

“Oh, baby,” he sighed, taking her chin in
his hand. “I would never take his place.”

“I know. But you’ve completely moved into
parts of my heart that had never been touched before,” she admitted
meekly. “You’re the only man to have me entirely, Teague. Every
single piece of me.”

He took her face in his hands and sent his
lips home to hers. That single moment was the start of a new
chapter together, and instead of just loving each other and hoping
that was enough, the relationship groundwork had not only been set
but also reinforced.

Teague pulled Camryn onto his lap, his hands
gripping her possessively. She took his face and kissed the hell
out of him right there on Brandon’s front porch.

Finally Teague pulled away, gasping for air.
“Come somewhere with me for the day. Night. Please?”

She only nodded, way too breathless to
answer with words.

***

While Camryn gathered her things from
Brandon’s bathroom, Teague waited uncomfortably in the front entry.
The two men stood in silence assessing the other, but also trying
to decide what to say.

After a few awkward motions—glances away to
avoid eye contact, arms folded across chests and then unfolded to
shove into pockets instead—Brandon finally spoke first.

“If you hurt her again I will fucking kill
you. You understand me? It will probably have to be in your sleep
so it’s fair, but don’t underestimate me, Teague.”

Teague had to laugh and Brandon eventually
broke into a smile.

“Deal,” Teague said, stepping forward to
hold out his fist.

Brandon bumped it just as Camryn appeared
from the hall. “Oh no, what are you two up to?”

Both men grinned and Teague answered, “It’s
caveman business. You don’t want to know.”

She looked the two of them over for a moment
and then shook her head. “Yeah, I really don’t.” Smiling, she
turned to Brandon and gave him a hug. “Thank you. I’ll talk to you
soon, okay?”

“Yeah, you better,” he replied, patting her
back. Then he pushed her away and said, “Get out of my sight. I’ve
got more exciting things to deal with today, like laundry.”

Camryn smiled, giving him a quick kiss on
the cheek and a final wave as she headed out the door with
Teague.

Once they were in the Mustang together,
Teague relaxed. Everything felt right. He held her hand as they
headed out of Fresno and nothing in the world could bring him down.
Camryn’s love and sharing a life with her was all he needed, and as
they pulled into a beautiful Inn at Monterey Bay two hours later,
nothing else mattered.