Kiss And Dwell (26 page)

“
This is it?
”
Monique asked, looking at the skimpy list.

“
Those things are a lot harder to accomplish than they are to write down. Trust
me, that
’
s plenty.
”

“
I
’
ll give him one thing at a time,
”
Monique said.
“
Basically, he
’
s already done
one and two. And if they got to visit today, he may have accomplished number
three as well.
”

“
I
’
d say that number three and number four will take more than a day,
”
Nan said
.

“
Both of them died. That alone should warrant quite a bit of conversation.
”

“
Yeah, you
’
re right. But I
’
ve only got six days after today. You think they
’
ll
get all that done by Wednesday?
”

Nan laughed.
“
Nothing like putting a deadline on love. I have no idea if they
’
ll
have all of it done by Wednesday. I
’
m saying that it should take more than a
day. But you
’
re probably right. They
’
d need that to happen by Wednesday so they
can have a little time to get to the intimacy phase before he has to cross.
”

Nan could tell by the pained expression on Monique
’
s face that she hadn
’
t liked
that response.
“
You okay?
”

“
Yeah,
”
Monique said, snapping the notepad against the table before standing
.

“
But honestly, I
’
m afraid I
’
m not going to get him to cross in time, that he
’
ll
be stuck in the middle forever and it
’
ll be my fault.
”

“
You wouldn
’
t have received an assignment that wasn
’
t possible to accomplish,
”

Nan reminded her.
“
What would be the point?
”

“
But what if it is possible, but I still don
’
t pull it off?
”

Nan leaned against the kitchen cabinets and studied Monique. There was more to
this than she was letting on, and Nan suspected she knew exactly what it was
.

“
You
’
re afraid you won
’
t accomplish your assignment because deep down, you don
’
t
want him to cross, do you?
”

Monique
’
s head shook slowly.

“
Honey, I
’
m sorry.
”
Nan wrapped an arm around Monique
’
s trembling shoulders.
“
I
wish I could tell you that you should let him stay, but I can
’
t. He has to go
.

If he doesn
’
t, like you said, he
’
ll be stuck in the middle. And eventually,
you
’
re going to cross to the other side. Then what? He
’
ll be in the middle, and
you
’
ll be over there for eternity. Not exactly what you
’
ve got in mind if you
’
re
wanting to be with him, is it?
”

Monique dropped her head on Nan
’
s shoulder.
“
No, it isn
’
t. And don
’
t worry. I
can do it. It
’
s just going to be hard.
”

“
Still planning to have brain sex with him tonight?
”
As she
’
d intended, the
question made Monique laugh.

“
I could say no, but I
’
d be lying,
”
Monique answered.

“
You think he
’
ll be able to fall for someone else when he
’
s having sex every
night with you, whether you
’
re touching or not?
”
Nan asked.

“
It
’
s just sex,
”
Monique clarified.
“
Why would that keep him from doing
everything on that list with Celeste? It isn
’
t like we
’
re falling in love, or
anything like that.
”

“
Okay,
”
Nan said, though she wondered if that weren
’
t exactly what it was like
.

“
Then let
’
s stop talking about it and go start on those tiles.
”

Monique
was extremely tired, emotionally and physically. If this were a normal
night, she
’
d have fallen into bed and dropped off to sleep instantly. But this
wasn
’
t a normal night, and she was examining the short list of Learn to Love
requirements when Ryan appeared in the chair beside the bed.

“
How was your day?
”
he asked, as though he were a husband talking to his wife
after a long day at the office.

The image scared her, more than she cared to admit.

“
It was only a question, Monique,
”
he said, grinning.
“
No need to get spooked.
”

She forced a smile.
“
Sometimes that bonding thing isn
’
t so hot.
”

“
Yeah, but other times, it
’
s very hot. Scalding, even.
”
He eyed her burnt-orange
gown. One of her favorite pieces of lingerie, it was satin with sheer panels
down each side and made her feel extremely feminine.

“
You like it?
”
she asked.

“
Nice color. Suits my mood,
”
he said.

“
Your mood?
”
she questioned.

“
Fiery. Tonight isn
’
t going to be a one-way deal, Monique.
”

She cleared her throat and blessed the fact that the orange gown, with its
smooth satin flowing to her ankles, covered her more than practically every
other piece of lingerie she owned, even with the sheer panels. She wanted to be
covered, at least to start with, because they had to talk about her plan. And
tonight, she was determined to talk first, then play, if she could convince Ryan
to go along.

He brought a long-fingered hand to his brow, then gently pinched the bridge of
his nose as if he had a sudden headache.

“
You okay?
”
she asked.

“
Sure I am. I
’
m dying to have sex with you, and you
’
re going to make me talk
about that piece of paper in your hand first, and about crossing over.
”

“
That is my part of our deal,
”
she reminded him.

“
How could I forget?
”
he replied smoothly, moving his fingers away from his head
and sitting back in the chair. He folded his hands together at his abdomen and
stretched his long legs in front of him, as though settling in for a
heart-to-heart.
“
Okay, I
’
m ready. Fire away. What do you want to know about my
day with Celeste?
”

“
First I want to ask you something,
”
she said.

“
Okay.
”

“
I didn
’
t feel you today. I mean, I thought I did this morning when I was with
Nan, but it wasn
’
t very strong, and then the rest of the day, well, nothing
.

Why? Was it because you were with Celeste and the two of you were hitting it
off?
”
She tried her best to act as though she wanted him to say it was.

“
You
’
re right,
”
he said easily.
“
You felt me this morning, but only long enough
for me to sense that you were doing your damnedest to get me to that light.
”
He
straightened a little in the chair.
“
After that, I didn
’
t want to stick around.
”

Monique didn
’
t want to touch that, so she asked,
“
What did you think of
Celeste?
”

He cleared his throat.
“
Well, your brother was right. She is a very attractive
lady. And she has a good heart. Truthfully, I didn
’
t get to talk to her much
because she was helping Chloe stay calm upon seeing her parents, but I could
tell she
’
s as beautiful on the inside as she is on the outside.
”

“
That
’
s what
Dax
said.
”
Monique stared at the notepad to keep from looking at
those intense dark eyes. Ryan thought Celeste was attractive, and that was good,
right? Right. She just had to keep telling herself that.
“
So, if you go back to
Pensacola tomorrow, do you think you might get more chances to talk to her,
maybe chat a bit, and then move on to talking about more personal things?
”

Ryan peeked at the list.
“
You
’
ve got an agenda for me on how to love?
”

“
Sort of.
”

“
Well, hand it over.
”
He reached for the notepad and they paused for a moment,
her hand on one side, his on the other. Monique felt the intense heat of him
extend through the paper barrier.

“
You want me.
”
The three words were more of a declaration than a question.

“
Yeah.
”

He gave the page a gentle tug and took it from her grasp.
“
And yet you want to
kick me over to the other side.
”

“
I have to,
”
Monique defended herself.

“
So you say.
”
He scanned the list.
“
Looks like we can check one and two off. I
met her, and there was an attraction.
”

“
There was?
”
Monique asked, not sure how she really felt about this revelation
.

He
’
d already admitted that he found her attractive, but somehow
“
there was an
attraction
”
stung more.

“
She
’
s an attractive woman, so my side of that equation was fulfilled. And my
looks, as far as I know, have never repulsed any female.
”

He smiled, and Monique melted. No, Ryan
Chappelle
was far, very far, from
repulsive. She studied the way his white T-shirt molded the broad flat planes of
his chest, the way his biceps pushed against the sleeves, the way the denim of
his jeans cradled slim hips. And she knew exactly what was hidden beneath those
jeans, could almost taste it.

Ryan shifted in his seat, and Monique was fairly certain that portion of his
jeans grew. He knew her thoughts, so she had better damn well control them until
they finished discussing the list.

“
Okay, so the first two are taken care of,
”
she agreed.

“
As far as number three goes, I wouldn
’
t say we
‘
chatted
’
exactly today, since
most of her time was spent with Chloe. If I go back tomorrow, I suppose that
’
s
what we
’
ll do—before we hit the discussing past, present and future deal. That
seems to be the plan here.
”

“
It
’
s a lot to do in a week, isn
’
t it?
”
Monique asked, dismayed. What if she
couldn
’
t get Ryan to love? What if she couldn
’
t get him to cross? And if she
didn
’
t, would she spend the rest of her life blaming herself for not making it
happen? How would she know that she tried her hardest, when deep down, she
didn
’
t want him to leave?

“
You know what might help me accomplish these?
”
he asked, tapping the notepad.

“
What?
”

“
Practice.
”
His black eyes examined her intensely.

“
Practice?
”
Monique repeated, her throat tightening.

“
You do want me to accomplish everything on that list this week, right? With
Celeste?
”