Kink's Way (20 page)

All the Brothers had come to see him as soon as he
had woken up, and that had gone a long way in helping him put Callie behind
him, at least for those twenty minutes. But now she stepped into the room, and
he felt his pain take a move to the back of his subconscious as the things he
shouldn’t feel moved through him. She looked tired and sad, and he wished like
hell he could take that all away from her.

“Hi,” she said softly, almost as if she were afraid
to say anything.

“Hey, kid.” He hadn’t meant to call her that,
because it almost seemed like a jab at their age difference. “
You doing
okay?”

She moved closer and pulled out a chair so that she
was sitting beside his bed. “I’m okay,” she said, and then stayed silent for a
few seconds. “Listen, I don’t know what to really say.” She looked up from her
lap, and this big tear slid down her cheek.

“Callie, what’s wrong?”

She shook her head. “These are happy tears. I’m just
glad you’re okay. Seeing you lying there unconscious…” She swallowed roughly.
“It was horrible, Lucien.”

He shifted on the bed and gritted his teeth when
pain lanced up his side.

“No, don’t move. I just wanted to say I’m glad
you’re okay.” She stood, but he reached out and took hold of her hand.

“Callie, I know when someone is lying to me. Tell me
what the fuck is wrong.”

She stared at him for a moment and slowly pulled her
hand away. She curled her fingers into her palm so they formed tight fists on
her thighs. “My life feels like it’s unraveling right before me, like I can’t
control anything anymore.” She was crying steadily now and lifted her hand to
brush the tears away. “My mom died, Lucien.
Her
and
Dale were in a car accident the other day—”

He didn’t say anything, didn’t know what to say that
would make the situation any less horrific. He stopped her from continuing by
pulling her closer and wrapping his arms around her body. The pain was
excruciating, but holding her, having her close to him, made that discomfort
feel like an annoyance. She shook and cried, and all he could do was
hold
her. For the first time in his fucking life, he felt at
a loss on how to control a situation, he and didn’t know how to make it right.

Chapter Sixteen

Two
weeks later

Cookie tightened her
hold on Kink’s waist and rested her cheek against his back. His cut was smooth
leather and buttery soft, and the smell of age and of it being well cared for
filled her nose. She closed her eyes and couldn’t stop herself from smiling.
Two weeks had already passed, and although that really wasn’t any time at all,
it still felt like years had already gone by. Although it had been a couple of
weeks since Kink and the other guys had come back from dealing with the cult,
and things were slowly starting to get back to the way they had been, there was
still this heaviness that was with all of the guys. Cookie could feel it
weighing down on the club, and when she was around the guys it felt
suffocating. That part of the danger might be over with, but there was still
the death of Callie’s mom, Lucien almost dying, and something else going on
that she couldn’t figure out yet.

Lucien was on the
mend, but he seemed different, more reserved. Maybe that was the weirdness that
she also felt, like he was holding something back? After he got shot he
certainly was harder now, if that was even possible, and the look in his eyes
was always calculating. It was different from how it was before. She didn’t
know him very well, but even then she knew he was a powerful man. Now he seemed
almost dead inside, and although she didn’t know how to help him, she wanted to
regardless. But then again it really wasn’t her place to try to help anyone
that wasn’t ready to be helped, and whatever Lucien was going through was
something he wasn’t ready to let go of just yet.

Over the last two
weeks her relationship with Kink had progressed slowly, but she was thankful
for that. When she had first started working for the club she had only seen
herself traveling the country and not settling in one spot. Although she still
wanted to do that, she also saw herself here, in River Run, and in Kink and
even Callie’s life. She had never had anyone in her life that really mattered,
and certainly hadn’t ever had anyone that cared for her in a genuine way. But
she had that here, with the MC. It warmed her, made her feel like she wasn’t a
waste of space, and wasn’t that what life was all about? Now she sat on the back
of his Harley with the wind blowing through her hair, the sun streaming down on
her back, and the strength and power she felt from Kink filling her. The
thought of Callie consumed her for a moment, and she wanted to cry for the
young girl all over again. It might have only been fourteen days since Callie
had found out about her mom passing, but the girl was strong, and she was
taking one day at a time. She was moving on with her life and trying not
letting the grief consume her. But Cookie was there for her, and so was Kink.
Cookie may only be a few years older than Callie, but she cared about her, and
saw her as this vulnerable and damaged young woman who needed to know she was
loved. Callie needed to know she wasn’t alone, and that Cookie knew how she
felt, knew the desperation that could consume a person until there was nothing
left. With Callie’s eighteenth birthday only a couple of weeks away, Cookie had
been trying to make this a memorable celebration. Cookie didn’t want a
celebration that would further bring sadness to her life since this would be
the first birthday Callie would have to celebrate without her mother here.

The funeral had
passed, a hard situation, but surprisingly Callie had asked Cookie to go with
her. They had been getting closer ever since Callie had gotten the phone call,
and she couldn’t help but see herself in Callie. And then Cookie had helped
Callie move out of her mother’s house and in with Kink. Cookie might not live
with Kink, despite how much she cared about him, but she knew that right now he
needed to be there for Callie. It was going to be a long road for her, and
right now she needed to be surrounded by people that cared for her.

They had been riding
for the last twenty minutes, and were well outside of River Run city limits.
Cookie pushed all of the grief and sorrow that had filled her life in the past,
and when she had been with the club, and rested her hands behind her. She may
not be holding onto Kink any further, but this small bit of freedom made her
feel like the world wasn’t as grim as she had always seen it. With her eyes
closed she tilted her head back and breathed in deeply. Being like this felt as
if she were flying, as if nothing tethered her to the world and she could just
float away without any worries.

“You
doing good, baby?”
Kink asked over the rumble of the Harley’s engine.

“Yeah,” she said,
and heard the happiness, excitement, and even relief in her voice. They were
going to the small lake that sat between River Run and Steel Corner. She had
read up about the sights around the town when she had first been brought to
River Run, but had stayed in this little bubble of her life. The lake was a
secluded area that was mainly used for fishing and boating, but the spot Kink
said they were going to was more isolated and private. This spot was quiet and
the perfect place for them to spend some time together. She wasn’t about to
talk about her former life, about her past or what had happened to her again.
That was done, she had said what she needed to say, and she hoped Kink
respected that. She just wanted to move on now.

He drove his bike
down the gravel road for another five minutes and finally pulled off to the
side and cut the engine. He was off the Harley first, and had his hands wrapped
around her waist and hauled her off the bike before she could even move. For
several seconds all Kink did was hold her, and she knew he was still dealing
with the almost death of a man he considered a part of his family. It had been
hard for all the members, but it seemed like Kink was taking it especially
hard. She knew Lucien was like a brother to Kink, and although she comforted
him, until she had actually started to care about the people that surrounded
her, she hadn’t been able to relate to the bombardment of emotion. But she also
knew the club members held themselves in check. Cookie could see on their faces
the anger that they barely restrained. These men weren’t just bikers or alpha
all the way—they were a breed all their own.

The sound of the
wind whistling through the trees had a hypnotic quality to it, but it was the
sound of Kink’s beating heart beneath her ear that lulled her to calmness. He
grabbed a blanket from one of his saddlebags and reached out to take her hand.
Kink led them down the path that led to the lake, and then laid the blanket out
in front of the water. Kink gestured for her to have a seat. They sat
side-by-side, neither saying anything, and both focusing on the water.

He turned and faced
her after a few moments, and just stared at her. Then he lifted his other hand
and cupped her cheek. “I have a lot of things on my mind, Cookie, things that
make me realize that I don’t want to spend my life without you, baby.”

“I feel the same
way, Kink.”

He shook his head
slowly. “No, baby, I don’t think you realize how much I care about you.” He
took her hand and placed it right over his heart. The act was so very gentle
and caring that it brought a wave of emotion to her. This biker was big,
muscular, and brought fear in other men with just a look. But here he was,
holding her hand over his heart, and looking at her with this vulnerable, open
expression. “I’ve already talked to you about being my old lady, but I want you
to know it means more than just being there, Cookie.” He started rubbing his
thumb along her cheek with his other hand, and she lifted her hand and placed
it over his. It was strange to be able to feel someone’s emotions as strongly
as if they were her own.

“I know this is
going to sound fucking crazy, but, Cookie, baby, you’re my life.” He let go of
her and faced the lake once more. It seemed like ages that they sat there in
silence, but it was a very comfortable, easy silence.

“The shit I’ve seen
and done sometimes keeps me up at night, Cookie.” He faced her again. “But
since you’ve come into my life I’ve realized that all the dark shit I’ve done
doesn’t compare to the pure feeling I have for you.”

For the next fifteen
minutes she listened to him talk about Callie and everything he had been
through with Sarah. She didn’t speak, just listened to him unload this burden
that clearly weighed heavily on him.

“I know you talked a
little about your past, but I want you to know that I’m here to listen to
whatever you have to say.”

She smiled and
glanced down at his lips. “Honestly, talking about all the bad stuff that
happened while I was growing up doesn’t change anything, and it doesn’t help me
in some kind of therapeutic way.” She searched his face with her gaze. “It
isn’t that I don’t trust you, or don’t want to confide in you—”

“I get it.” He
smiled softly. “I really do understand, and I’m okay with whatever you decide.
I know that rehashing all that toxic stuff doesn’t help some people.” He leaned
in and pressed his forehead to hers. “I just want you to know that if you ever
need someone to talk
to,
I hope you let me be that
person you need.”

They had already
started rebuilding the MC building that had gotten bombed. The girls had moved
out of the clubhouse and back to the cabin since the explosion hadn't affected
it. It had been nice staying at the clubhouse, being around the guys while
Lucien recovered, and spending time with Callie. She had learned a lot about
the young girl in these last couple of weeks, and not just the pain that Callie
felt. Cookie hadn’t spoken to her about Lucien, although she wanted to, because
she could see how Callie looked at the club President. It was the same longing
way Lucien looked at Callie. That was going to be another situation that
stirred shit up, for sure, especially if Lucien and Callie acted on what they
felt for each other. But fortunately Kink was so focused on Callie’s feelings
with the passing of Sarah that he wasn’t even paying attention to the chemistry
happening with his daughter and the much older Lucien. He was blind to a lot of
things, stuff that would most likely put him in a rage if he ever realized what
was happening right in front of him. Cookie had thought about bringing it up to
Kink, but she realized it wasn’t her place. She didn’t know for sure what was
going on, and Callie needed to bring this up.

She pressed her lips
to his, closed her eyes, and then moved off of him. He looked surprised at
first, but when she started removing her clothing the heat started to cover his
expression. When she was naked in front of him she held her hand out. It took him
only a couple of seconds to take what she offered, and then he was getting
undressed, too. Cookie didn’t even care if someone saw them, didn’t care if
what they were doing was standing naked in a public place. All she wanted was
to have some solace with the man she was falling for. With his hand in hers,
she didn’t say anything as she led them to the water’s edge. The temperature
around them was warm with a slight breeze, but the water was frigid when she
stepped into it.