Keep Me (Beggar's Choice #3) (26 page)

You
– I’m copying you but sue me! I love your
beautiful face and body; the way that you care about people; your fierce
intelligence and drive to succeed; and the way that you’ve overcome so much
without feeling sorry for yourself. You show others so much concern but never
think that your problems warrant it. I’m also very partial to your pussy. It’s
my favourite pussy because it’s plush and pink and smells sweet like honey and
come.

My song for you is below. I think it sums you up

Make sure that you sleep properly and take care when you
leave. Don’t wander around on your own – I MEAN IT!

Yours a little worried

Bram

Your song from me is: ‘Cry To Be Found’ by Del Amitri

From: Alys O’Neill

To: Bram O’Connell

Subject: Overstepping

Bram

I understood that you were concerned when you used the
shouty capitals but I think it sank in a little bit more when our ‘driver’
arrived to pick Elen and I up and deliver us to the hospital. I think it fully
sank in when I realised that the poor man was expecting to wait outside and
take us home again when our shift finished!

Do you think that we should talk about your little
overprotective problem and the way that you are spending money on me at the
moment? Talking of this please see your song choice below.

On a plus note Mick nearly choked inhaling his shepherd’s
pie when this big man with a chauffeur’s uniform and cap appeared in his
kitchen!

Thank you for your list of favourite things. You have
devoted way too much time to thinking about the positive merits of my pussy.
She’s starting to feel objectified and my clit is sulking!

Okay, we’ve done favourites and fears and it’s late and I’m
tired so how about a defining moment in our lives. Mine is how my
claustrophobia started. I told you that it wasn’t anything to do with my time
in care, do you remember? However, I lied. My claustrophobia dates from a
couple that used to foster me. One night I answered back when he wouldn’t give
me my dinner. They used to use withholding food as a way of control and I was
bolshy even then. His reaction was to lock me in a cupboard for 24 hours. I
wasn’t allowed out and I wet myself. I remember the fear and the shame very
clearly even today.

Yours

Alys

Your song from me is: ‘My Love Don’t Cost a Thing’ by
Jennifer Lopez

From: Bram O’Connell

To: Alys O’Neill

Subject: Red with Rage

Alys

What was his fucking name?

Bram

From: Alys O’Neill

To: Bram O’Connell

Subject: Chill Out

Bram

Calm down. I can practically see the steam coming out of
your ears. Luckily for him they are both dead now. Did I ever tell you that I
secretly love the way that you are protective of me? I may grumble but it’s
like the comforting touch of our eiderdown when I snuggle into it to know that
I have someone on my side.

Alys

Your song from me is: ‘Into Your Arms’ by The Lemonheads

From: Bram O’Connell

To: Alys O’Neill

Subject: Your Side

Alys

I am always on your side and that will never change. It’s
also a good thing that the fucker is dead. There are a lot of people who are
left in charge of kids that shouldn’t be left in charge of a hamster.

Okay due to my high blood pressure we never got round to my
defining moment. I suppose the real one is my mum making me go to live with my
aunt and uncle. My uncle was a very hard man. He never liked me and he used to
hit me and throw me out of the house a lot. However, once my arse was over the
doorstep and into the street he would never let me back in even if it was night
time.

I used to sleep on park benches because I couldn’t bear to
ask someone for help and have them say no or pity me. I felt this because the
first time that it happened I went to their neighbour – you remember her? 
Anyway she rang my uncle. I’m sure that she thought she was doing the right
thing but the result wasn’t pretty – remember the broken collarbone? So, you
can imagine a park bench was preferable to relying on anyone.

One night a bloke tried it on with me. He grabbed me really
hard and got on top of me and I was so scared that I wet myself. That was the
night I went to Matt. He never asked any questions, just got me clean clothes
and made a bed on the floor, and after that he used to leave his window open
for me so that I could crawl in. He could have got into real trouble with his
parents because they were exceptionally strict, but he treated it as if it was
totally normal and he was just happy to have a sleepover. He laid that bed out
every night for years whether I turned up or not and he never told a soul about
it.

That’s why I would never turn my back on him because he
never did with me. I could never understand why he was so reluctant to tell me
that he was gay. He could have told me that he was a murderer and I would have
just shrugged. On the plus side my uncle actually gave me Matt which is one of
the best illustrations of making lemonade when given lemons.

I’m replying to your concerns about my pending penury
through spending too much money on you with my song. See below.

Your Bram

Your song from me is: ‘Forever in Blue Jeans’ by Neil
Diamond

From: Alys O’Neill

To: Bram O’Connell

Subject: Matty is Mine

Bram

I hated to hear that story but is it wrong for me to love
Matt so much? He really is one of the best people in your world and I’m so
pleased that you have him.

How about worst faults? I have a fair few but I’ll put some
more paper in the printer if I’m going to be printing your reply! Mine are:

Pride
– I won’t show when I’m hurt or when I want
something in case it’s used against me. I find it very difficult to ask for
help. The flip side of this is that I can seem cold but I’m not at all. It’s
just the way that I’ve always had to be.

Jumping to conclusions
– I do this a lot and I
shouldn’t. What I should do is step back a bit and think, rather than make snap
judgements about people. I made them about you and I was wrong all the way
through.

These two faults led to me making the biggest mistake of my
life on the night that we slept together. I made a snap judgement about you and
jumped to the conclusion that you didn’t want more with me, and then my pride
kicked in because I couldn’t let you see how hurt I was by that.

I think it’s time to be honest and I want you to know that
our night together was the best of my life and if you had offered more I would
have jumped at it like a shot. It meant everything to me and I wish that I had
just let you talk. Maybe you would have said differently to what I thought but
then again maybe you wouldn’t. It doesn’t matter now but I wanted you to know
that you mean something to me and listen to the words of my song because it
concerns that night.

Your apologetic Alys

Your song from me is: ‘About You Now’ by Sugababes

From: Bram O’Connell

To: Alys O’Neill

Subject: Not Yet

A ghrá

Thank you for saying that. You have no idea how much that
means to me. I wish that you had said something because the whole morning would
have turned out differently. Firstly I would have taken you back to bed and
loved on you hard. Secondly … well secondly I’ll leave until I see you again
and then we can talk about this.

Your faults are interesting because what you see as faults I
see as positives. See my song choice below because it says what I think about
you.

As for my faults I have none because to paraphrase Mary
Poppins I am practically perfect in every way! However, you want some flaws so
here you are:

I use humour to cover my real feelings
– I’ve always
done this. It stopped me being bullied and it’s stopped me getting my head
kicked in by jealous men many times. However, thinking about it, it probably
dates from when my mum sent me away. I hate to sound whiny and self-obsessed
and you’ll know this but people tend to keep you around if you keep everything
light.