Kee Patterbee - Hannah Starvling 03 - The Priest Who Ate a Poison Petit Fore

Title Page & copywrite

Dedication

Prologue

Menu

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty One

Chapter Twenty-Two

Chapter Twenty Three

Chapter Twenty Four

Chapter Twenty Six

Epilogue

More Titles

THE PRIEST WHO ATE THE POISON PETIT FORE

by Kee Patterbee

To Mr. Patterbee, how can I do this without your loving support!

Prologue

Two months later,
on
a local news segment.

“…It was a most unusual camera. Back to you, Charles.”

(Cut to Charles Diedridge behind the news desk.)

“Indeed it was, Paula. We catch up now with a couple of heroes who have become something of a local sensation. Their story has been going around the internet and has inspired many not to sit down and take it when faced with a large task. Instead, you should approach it with everything you have. It doesn’t matter your size. It’s your attitude. Luther Dingle has the story.”

(Shot of Dingle standing with a microphone.)

“That’s right, Charles. The story is about loyalty, feistiness, and big, big attitude.

(Cut to a small Yorkshire terrier and another, small white and tan dog playing in the grass together.)

“Gigantor and Hazelnut. Two hound friends with a nose for trouble and a sense of protection. Several months back, these two took down the alleged murderer in the case of the Poisoned Petit Fours. Despite their size, they intervened to bring about justice.”

(Shot of dogs sniffing at the camera. Hazelnut licks the lens. Cut to Interviewee. Screen reads, Sindee Starvling-Gigantor’s Owner.)

“Oh, yes, we were there. Gigantor there, is ours.

(Cut to Yorkshire terrier.)

Hazelnut belongs to my granddaughter, Hannah, and her husband, Hym.”

(Cut to small, mixed breed dog.)

“How did these two become involved in a murder case?”

(Cut to interviewee)

“Oh, we were helping Hannah. One of the involved parties asked her to look into the murder case. She’s a bit of an investigator. She gets it from me. I used to dabble when I was young.”

“As the Gumshoe Gal.”

“Oh, I haven’t gone by that in years. My granddaughter was with the FBI before she became a culinary consultant. Now they call her the Culinary Detective. She asked me to help on the case and we happened to have these two with us. When the perp ran……”

(Shot of dogs running. Cut back to interview.)

“The alleged murderer.”

“That’s what I said. It’s detective lingo, honey. Well, the ALLEGED MURDERER attempted to get away and knocked my husband down. Jayland, over there.””

(Cut to older man in his late 70s standing nearby with the dogs. His arms are crossed and he frowns. Screen reads, Jayland Starvling-Gigantor’s Owner. Cut back to interview.)

“He was walking them. He let go and the dogs went after the perp and barked and nipped until their leashes became tangled beneath and down they went. It gave my granddaughter enough time to take control of the situation until the local authorities arrived.”

(Cut to the dogs barking.)

“Quite the attitude for such small creatures.”

“Oh, most assured. They may weigh less than ten pounds, but they think they weigh one hundred and fifty.”

(Shot of interviewee holding dogs. Cut to dogs getting a medal from mayor of Happiness.)

“Happiness, a senior living community, was so grateful for their assistance that they were named honorary citizens of the community. They were also given special dispensation since you have to be 55 years old or older to reside there. Otherwise, it would be a little over seven doggy years before they were legal.”

(Cut to seniors petting the dogs, who accept the attention with enthusiasm. Back to interview.)

“So what’s next for these canine heroes?”

“Treats. Love. A children’s book, a commercial, and an animated short, but for the most part, just some yard time.”

“And maybe some more investigational interference in the future?”

“Oh, you never know. As Sherlock Holmes said, ‘The game’s afoot’.””

(Cut to Dingle holding Hazelnut. Dog licks his face as he laughs.)

“Indeed, or in this case, a paw. From Twilight and Happiness. Back to you, Charles.”

Welcome to the Wedding Reception of

Hannah Starvling and Hymnal “Hym” Miles

The Bride & Groom

Hannah Marie Starvling
– Former FBI. Part-time sleuth. Full-time Culinary Consultant/Chef. Cool, calculating, methodical, and distant.

Hymnal Isaac “Hym” Miles
– Former law enforcement. The fiancée of the head chef. Handsome and quick-witted.

Caterers

Catherine “Cate” Jordan
– Full time librarian. Part-time sleuth. Full time sassy best friend and Maid of honor. Love of Alvin Hayes. Specialty: Knowledge with a hint of sarcasm.

Sindee “Gran” Starvling
(a.k.a. the Gumshoe Gal) – Retired restaurateur. Part-time amateur sleuth. Full time wife and grandmother. Would be great-grandmother. Totally sassy and flirtatious wife of Jayland. Specialty: All things spicy with a large dose of meddlesome.

Jayland “Papa Jay” Starvling
– Retired Navy and restaurateur. Married to Sindee. Full time husband and down to earth, no nonsense grandfather. Specialty: Surly, grumpy, and protectiveness.

Buster Jordan
– The Adonis bodied, Apollo smiling, often clueless cousin of Cate, friend of the head chef, and all around Prince Charming. Specialty: Women.

Magdalen Miles
– Sister of the groom. Independent and curious. Budding investigator. Would be love interest to Buster. Specialty: Charming Prince Charming.

William Langston ‘Hoo To/Will’ Hooligan
– Best friend of Groom. Wedding Caterer and confidant. Specialty: Good old Southern comfort food and practical wisdom.

Wait Staff

Henry E. Holmes, M.D. –
Amateur sleuth. Knowledgeable. Oddly out of place.

Sheriff Jackson ‘Jack’ Borden –
Curious. Capable. Willing.

Hazelnut
– New member of the Miles household. Opinionated and underfoot.

Gigantor
– Sindee and Jayland’s substitute great grand baby. Loyal. Also underfoot.

Finger Foods

Reverend Jonathan Whipson
– Head minister at Happiness Medical. Grandfather of Susan. Friend of Groom and his sister. Keenly aware. Seemingly good. Served with a hint of a past.

Susan York
- Resident Doctor specializing in gerontology. Wife of Calvin York. Dedicated granddaughter of the Reverend Whipson. Prepared with a hint of murderess.

Calvin York
- Resident Doctor specializing in gerontology. Intelligent, dedicated, and struggling. Husband of Susan York. Served tenuously.

Father Raymond Janus * et al.
- Heir to Reverend Whipson’s position. Cool. Collective. Secretive. Demanding. Served with a hint of terse.

Jackie Rhoades
- The morally questionable custodial engineer for Sunnyvale Rest. He has a connection to the entrée and many reasons to feed him the wrong thing. Served up suspiciously.

Brother Richard Wessel
- Associate of Whipson and Janus. Unpretentious but belying a history. Served accidentally.

Sweets

Skylar Marie (nee Wellman) Starvling
– Genius, socially awkward mother of the bride.

Michael Jay Starvling
– Genius, socially inept father of the bride. Lover of cake.

Vera Bessinger
– Heiress and bridesmaid. Cluelessly rich.

Critic
– Hound. Ring bearer. Full of licks and love.

Various other individuals

Items of Note

Petit Fours a la Deadly

Flavors include: Accidental. Intentional. Or murderously attempted.

*Please Note* These sweet are served tenuously, with a hint of bitter poison.

Chapter One

“Twice on Sunday and every Wednesday night,” stated Hymnal “Hym” Miles in a matter-of-fact tone.

Hannah Starvling finished off the last of a petite four, before looking over to her fiancé. “Your mom was religious?”

“As if Magdalen and my name didn’t give that away.”

Magdalen
, Hannah thought. She had yet to meet Hym’s younger sister, the thirty one year old nurse living in Chicago.
So many people in his life that I have yet to meet
. She studied his face for a moment. Grinning, she reveled in the fact that in a scant few weeks she would marry the man.
I’ve been looking for you forever, Sweet Face
, rolled through her mind. Hannah leaned over and kissed his cheek, causing him to smile.

Hym turned his black ‘70 Mustang onto the ramp leading from the interstate. At the top, he turned to the right and headed down the road.

“When are you going to let me drive Baby?” Hannah said. In her mind, she wondered why men had the propensity to name their vehicles.