Katie's Dream (23 page)

He came alongside me, talking more calmly, but the
anger was still in his eyes. “It might've been worse, Sammy. It's a good thing our daddy died when he did, 'cause I was gonna kill him. I'd made up my mind. He done us wrong. He done our mother wrong. He was the one started her drinking, did you know that? I was gonna find him and kill him, but then Mother came and told us he was already dead. I was pretty mad about that. Kind of felt like he cheated me. Probably for the best, though. If I'd started killing, maybe I wouldn't have stopped. Once the door's open, you know. That's what happened with the stealing.”

I glanced up at him, wondering if he'd ever really come close to such a thing as murder. I could almost believe him. I'd seen his temper when he was a teen, and it was far worse than what had happened today. He'd only been sixteen when Mom gave us the news that our father had died. I'd felt relief more than anything, just to know he wouldn't be showing up anymore, wreaking havoc on my life. But Edward had raged, throwing things and stomping off. And I'd never understood why.

“We can be thankful for God's timing,” I told him. “He surely knew what you were thinking.”

“Listen to us,” he laughed. “Talking decent. While we're at it, you might as well go ahead and level with me, Sammy. I won't think less of you.”

“I am leveling with you.”

“No. I'm talking about Trudy now. I haven't lied about the things I've done or the things I've wanted to do. I think you ought to talk to me just as straight. I want you to admit it, and I'll understand. She's real pretty. Enough to tempt anybody, married or not. You're just human, Sammy, and that's all I need to hear. I won't say nothing else to nobody.”

“I'm human. And I've made plenty of mistakes, Edward. But not that one.”

He got in front of me, stopping my progress. “What's
the matter with you? Don't you know your stupid wife's gonna love you no matter what? I'm not gonna tell her what you say! Just own up! Don't you owe me that?”

I could feel every muscle in my body tighten. “I'm telling you the truth.”

He shook his head, kicked at the dust. “At least I can admit what I done. You always were a coward, running from every little thing. But what good is it gonna do you running from this? It's already caught you, can't you see that?”

He got quiet, but I knew he wasn't finished. And I just waited, knowing it wouldn't solve anything to say something else or to try to walk away now.

“You're supposed to be a Christian,” he finally said, talking quiet and slow. “What do you think your God's gonna say one day about you lying when you don't even have to? And what are you gonna do about Katie, huh? Can't you find the decency to claim her?”

“I'll take her in,” I told him. “I'll raise her as my own if we don't find her family. But she's not mine. Not like you think.”

I knew what was coming, and I didn't fight it. I just stood there as he took another swing, hard and fast, this time landing me in the dirt.

“Why ain't you fighting back?” he yelled. “You ain't the runt you used to be. Get up and let me see what you got.”

“No.”

“You're weak,” he taunted. “That's all you are. You're a spineless cheat and a coward.”

Part of me wanted to grab him by the legs, knock him to the ground, and show him I had some fight in me. But I knew it wouldn't be right. My brother was just mistaken about something. He was just thinking something that wasn't so. He didn't know any better.
Lord, touch him. Help him see.

“You don't deserve none of what you've got, Sammy! I would've left you alone! I'd have been your friend, if you wanted one. But now I'm gonna see that folks know what a lying skunk you are! People 'round here ought to know what's living in their midst! Julia ain't the only one. They should know you for the thieving cheat you are.”

“Edward—”

“I'll be doing a community service, Sammy. The kind of thing you oughta be proud of.”

He turned to his car, and I struggled to my feet.
Oh, God. What can I do?

“You wanted to walk. Go ahead and walk. I got work to do. I been decent enough not to lie to you, Sammy. You should've been straight with me when you had the chance. I'll make you sorry you weren't.”

He drove away in a flurry of dust, faster than anybody should drive.
Lord, help him,
I prayed.
Help me.

What would he do now? Maybe he was right, maybe we could have been friends somehow. But all this about Trudy Vale was a cruel hoax, or the unkindest of coincidences. He would tell people, I had no doubt. And they would believe him, in spite of themselves. How could anyone take my side, against even Katie's word? She was only an innocent child. I couldn't expect a grown soul to believe me. Except maybe Juli. Maybe.

I started walking again, thinking about the doubt I'd seen in her eyes. She had come out of that for a while, standing up for me right to Edward's face, but would it last? When she had the time to think on it all, would I see the questions in her eyes again?

My head was pounding and my gut burned like fire. But I didn't care about the pain. Franky was still in the hospital, and I'd have to let people know. I'd have to see Barrett Post about going back to Mcleansboro. There were too many other things to think about to let myself be
very concerned over what Edward did or said. Let him tell the world whatever he wanted. I would stand or fall before God alone, and there was nobody else that really mattered.

Except Juli. And my kids.

FIFTEEN

Julia

It might sound terrible, but I took the chicken bones and boiled them for broth before I gave them to Whiskers. “Get two meals off a chicken if you can,” Grandma Pearl used to tell me. “No use being extravagant.”

I had the girls helping me cut noodles I'd mixed and rolled out across our tabletop. It was so hot that we were all drenched in sweat, so I stopped every few minutes and wet a washcloth to touch to the backs of our necks. Willy had come by, bringing me Emma Grace, who wouldn't stop fussing for Lizbeth. I'd gotten the baby down for a nap, and now Willy was helping Robert finish cleaning the barn stalls.

Nobody was saying much about Franky. I guess because we didn't know what to say. It made me hurt inside, thinking of the pain on his face. But I was glad Lizbeth was
with him. She was always quicker to comfort the little ones than her father was.

I prayed as I rolled noodles and let the girls cut any shape and length they wanted. Noodles would be such a treat that nobody would care what they looked like. I wondered why I was taking the time, except that the noodles would go well with the chicken broth and keep the girls happily occupied, now that they'd used up every bit of the clay making bowls and lopsided whatnots.

“Why'd he run over Franky?” Sarah asked.

And Rorey's question was even worse. “Is he gonna die like Mama?”

I didn't want to talk about it, because I knew I'd cry, so I just kept on keeping them busy.

Katie was the quietest. But just her presence made me feel worse than ever. She'd known Samuel's name, what he looked like, where we used to live. She'd known we had two children. It gave me an ache inside that wouldn't stop. What if it were all true and this little girl was my Samuel's child? Or what if it wasn't, and here I was doubting him again? What kind of wife was I?

He would be hurt if he knew the questions that were roaming around in my brain. What would he say to me when he got the chance? I knew I shouldn't doubt, not for a second. I should be strong enough to shake it all off like it was nothing. Maybe he wouldn't want to say anything to me at all if he knew the way I was thinking. And I couldn't blame him, not the least little bit.

Robert and Willy came up to the house, looking dirty and tired. “We're done, Mom,” Robert said. “I'm hungry.”

“You deserve to be hungry after all that. Did you wash up?”

“Our hands. Got any more a' that cake?”

“Only the one edge that got too done, and it's hard as rock. I thought I'd set it out for Whiskers.”

“Well, give him a chunk, but I'll soak some in milk. Okay?”

I'd whacked two pieces apart and had the milk up from the basement when Whiskers started barking.

“Can we go fishin'?” Willy asked, ignoring the sound.

I looked out the window but didn't see anything.

“Maybe squirrels, Mom,” Robert said. “I didn't hear no car.”

“You wanna go fishin', Robert?” Willy persisted.

“I dunno. Seems like my dad's been gone an awful long time. They oughta be comin' back. Don't you think?”

“Maybe they're stayin' the night,” Willy suggested.

“No, 'cause that's bad,” Rorey said immediately. “If they's stayin', it means Franky's hurt bad.”

I wished they wouldn't talk about it. But I knew to expect it. Of course they'd be wondering. “He's probably just needing plenty of rest,” I tried to assure Rorey. “And it's quite a ways. If they stay, I'm sure we'll hear something in the morning.”

“Dad wouldn't stay, would he?” Robert asked. “I know Edward wouldn't.”

“Why not?” Sarah asked innocently.

“Because he wouldn't care enough.”

“Well, Daddy would,” Sarah protested, her eyes suddenly wide with concern.

“Of course, he cares,” Robert told her. “That's different. But he'll be coming back home to see about us.”

I should've been thinking about that. I should've sent Robert over to Barrett Post's a long time ago to tell him what happened. Because sure as anything, Samuel would get home if he could, and bring George and Lizbeth and Franky, if Franky were well enough to leave the hospital. But they'd gone with Edward. I should've been thinking! I should've sent one of the boys to ask Barrett Post to go after
them. Because Robert was more than likely right. Edward might just up and leave them stranded in Mcleansboro. Who could tell what he might do?

“Robert, maybe you and Willy should go over to Barrett Post—”

The dog started barking again.

“Coons,” Sarah said.

“Not before dark,” Robert corrected her. This time he looked out. His face grew even more sober than it already was. “Mom.”

I looked, and at first I didn't see anything. But then Whiskers went running out to the road, just as far east as we could see from the window. He wasn't barking anymore.

There was a man coming our way. Walking. Limping. Samuel?

I went running outside. Every one of the kids followed me. What in the world could have happened? Had I been right to think of Edward just leaving them? Surely Samuel couldn't have walked all that way back. Not this soon. Did they even get that far?

Whiskers was prancing around him in greeting now. Samuel had stopped to lean over against a fence post, and I knew he was hurt. But he saw us coming and straightened back up, trying to walk as normal as ever.

Thoughts went flying through my head. Had there been another accident? Had Edward done something else just as careless, just as foolish?

“Daddy!” Sarah yelled in delight. But then she stopped, suddenly scared. “Where's Franky?”

I stopped too, when I saw Samuel's face. It was swelling, turning red and purple. Suddenly it wasn't the day's heat making me feel so awful hot. Whatever had happened, Edward had done it. After hurting Franky so badly, now he had hurt Samuel too.

“What happened?” Robert asked, something hard in his voice.

Samuel tried to smile. “Don't any of you worry, all right? They wanted to keep Franky in the hospital a while. His leg's broke, but he'll be all right. George and Lizbeth are staying with him.”

“Samuel, sit down,” I said. “Robert, bring me the water bucket and a cloth.”

“I can make it to the well, Juli.” Samuel looked strange. Strong and broken all at the same time.

“You don't have to. Sit here in the shade. Please.” I touched his side, and he winced. “Sammy, what's happened?”

“Looks like somebody beat him up,” Willy said.

I could've screamed at his insensitivity, for saying something like that in front of the little girls!

Sarah was grabbing for her father's hand. “Are you okay, Daddy? Are you okay?”

Katie was standing beside me speechless.

“I'm fine,” Samuel told us all and started walking past us toward the well.

I knew he wasn't. I knew by the way he moved that he was bruised even more than we could see. But he moved quickly to the well, took a long drink of water, and then poured a dipperful over his head.

I thought of Edward doing that, pouring water on himself. Only he shook like a dog, and Samuel didn't shake. He just stood there for moment, letting the wetness drip over him. How far had he walked in this heat? He sat down, and I knew he was pretty spent.