Kaleidocide (25 page)

“I perceive by the book in my hand,”
the main character said,
“that I am condemned to die, and after that to come to judgment, and I find that I am not willing to do the first, nor able to do the second.”
A little later Angelee caught a glimpse of the face of the man named Pliable, who smiled a big smile and said,
“This is very pleasant”
when told about the Celestial City, then shortly after she could see him covered with mud from the swamp and not smiling anymore. Instead he was saying angrily,
“Is this the happiness you have told me all this while of?”

Michael didn't seem to notice or care about this background noise for a while, so Angelee thought the silent prayers she had been throwing up were all in vain. But then after a lapse in the conversation, when she was almost done putting away the goods, he did say something about it.

“Is that the Bible?” he asked, looking toward the little boy and his old holopad.

“Almost,” she said, hiding her excitement.

“That's funny,” he went on, ignoring her enigmatic answer. “I talked to your husband about that when he helped me. I got the impression he was trying to convert me.”

“He probably was,” she said. “He did that a lot.”

“And what about you?” He made a circle with his hand, obviously finding it awkward to even discuss this. “Are you…?”

“Peter was always more committed than me,” she said. “But I believe, too … especially now that God brought you into my life.”

“Let's just … take it slow,” he said, standing up from the stool and clearing his throat nervously. “Do you understand?” She nodded. “So you said that Chris likes the pool, right?” She nodded again, trying not to look too disappointed, and he added, “Let me show you something.”

Michael led them both outside, and for the first time Angelee noticed just how beautiful this location was, since the pool deck was raised slightly, affording them an amazing view of the vineyards all around, and the hills in the distance. There were a few tall winery buildings a good distance away, but no houses in sight, only the rows of dark yellows, maroons, and some remaining greens of the autumn grapevines. Angelee was rather naïve to the ways of the rich, but she knew enough to know this was prime real estate. Michael's former lover must have been an important person, too—or maybe he had helped her to buy it.

“Vera,” he said to the lukewarm air, “make the whole pool two feet deep.” And she did; in a matter of seconds the water dropped down to that height, the broad steps at both ends reaching down that far, obviously designed to accommodate any depth desired.

“So Chris can play in the water as long as he wants, without you having to worry about his safety. Or if you want to swim yourself but keep an eye on him, you can do this: Vera, return half the pool to five feet.”

The water immediately rose on the far side of the pool, and with it a transteel barrier that held it in and allowed the near side to remain shallow. Michael also explained that there was an invisible canopy over the whole pool area made of the same material, which allowed the air inside it to stay warm, and blocked only the harmful rays from the sun. He told Vera what temperature the air and water should be.

“Can I go in the water, Mommy?” the little boy asked, his attention finally diverted from the holo, which he had paused.

“I think so,” she said, then looked at Michael. “There's only one problem. I don't have a swimsuit.” He grunted a “Hmmm,” and they both thought for a moment.

“Why don't you look through Tara's stuff in your room?” he said finally. “I'm sure she has something you can wear in there.”

“She won't mind?”

“She won't know,” he said. “So I'm sure she won't mind.”

“Okay. Come on, Chris, let's get changed.” And they both hurried off excitedly.

Once in the room, she put some shorts on Chris, over his pull-up, then rooted through the closets and drawers for a swimsuit. The most modest one she found was a white two-piece with a brand name that made it more expensive than a month's rent in the apartment she and her husband had lived in. She went into the bathroom and put it on, looking at herself from various angles, feeling a little guilty, but only a little because of the overwhelming sense she had that she was destined to be with Michael, because of all that had happened and the fact that she felt the same way she did with Peter before they were married. She knew that she might have to wait a while for that physical union with this man, judging by some of his reactions, but she believed the spiritual connection was already there because God saw all of time at once, as Peter had taught her. So in God's plan and in His eyes they were already together.

Back in the room, she found a beach shawl in the same drawer, to cover up a bit until she got out to the pool, and as she was slipping it on she noticed a frame sitting on top of the drawers. In it was a picture of a slightly younger Michael, with his arm around a woman that she presumed was Tara, the owner of the house. They were by the pool, and were both wearing swimsuits, the woman in the same white suit. The first thing Angelee noticed about the picture was Michael's body, which was as nice as she had imagined. Then she noticed that the woman was very beautiful herself, a milky skinned mixture of black and white who was much taller than Angelee. The next thing she thought about, which had the effect of dampening some of her excitement, was that the picture was still displayed, so it seemed to contradict Michael's claim that he and Tara had broken up years ago. But then Angelee realized that the picture did seem to be taken a while ago, and the woman may have still been pining for him after all this time.
I can understand that,
she thought to herself.

She looked around cautiously, even though she knew Chris was the only other person in the room, and turned the frame facedown on the shelf. Then she grabbed Chris's hand and led him out to the pool.

Michael was still out there, sitting in a chair and soaking up the sun and the view. She took hope from this, because he was a busy man and could have easily disappeared back into his room. Maybe he had wanted to see her again …

“I found those toys in the shed,” he said, pointing to the colorful objects lined up by the pool. “I remembered Tara got them for her niece, who visited once in a while.”

She took off the shawl and helped Chris into the pool, and he started splashing almost immediately. She pulled most of the toys into the pool for him one by one, and as she did, she got the impression that Michael was trying not to look at her, but not entirely succeeding.

“Do you want to come in?” she asked him. “I think Chris is okay—we could swim in the other part.” She gestured to the deeper half, behind the transteel barrier.

“Uh, thanks,” he said, “but no, I have some calls to make. Gotta get to work, you know?” He stood up and tossed the last remaining toy to Chris, and added, “Have fun, and let me know when dinner's ready.”

“Okay,” she said, and studied him as he walked into the house, comparing him to her first husband and thinking there wasn't much comparison. But Peter was a very spiritual man, and this one wasn't—she could just tell, by spending even this small amount of time with him. So she resolved again to introduce him to Chris's holo whenever she could, so that if they did come together, they could be one in every way.

 

24

SPECIAL HELL

When I got into the house I realized that I was sweating, and it wasn't from the California sun in November. I grabbed a glass of ice water, retreated into my room as quickly as I could, locked the door behind me in what was mostly a symbolic gesture, plopped down in my chair, and tried to get a handle on the emotions and impulses colliding inside me.

While I had been sitting outside waiting for Angelee to return from getting changed (
Why did I do that? It wasn't just the toys
), my mind began replaying some of the many times Tara and I had been in that pool, somewhere around it, and even walking in the vineyards nearby. And I found myself wanting that again, and let my mind replay far too much of it. But then I thought of Lynn and felt so bad, because she was carrying my child and we had just had such a great time a few days before at Sausalito, and so many other times before that. My mind replayed some of those times, too, and I felt mystified once again that I could have so much but still want more. I loved being with Lynn, but the fact that Tara and Angelee were something different from her seemed to make them desirable, too, not to mention their sheer physical appeal.

Then Angelee had come out to the pool, right when I was trying to think about Lynn and rebuking myself for these bad thoughts, and it became more difficult for me.
I guess I shouldn't have stayed outside—that was the bottom line—because deep down I hadn't been there for the right reasons.
She was such a beautiful young woman, inside and out, and she actually thought God wanted her to be with me!

I didn't really even think about telling her the truth, ostensibly because I wanted her to remain loyal to me and not upset her too much. But again, I had to admit that part of my motive was that I enjoyed her adoring me and wanted to leave the door open more than a crack. That was exactly what had been happening with Tara for almost six years now, and when I thought about that, it became clear to me that the way to deal with all this was to work my plan to finally tell Tara that it was over and would never happen again. That would solidify my relationship with Lynn more, and make me stronger to resist other temptations like Angelee—or so I thought at the time.
And why am I even thinking about all this when I'm the target of the deadliest assassination method known to man? Then again, that's why I have the opportunity to finally put Tara behind me …

I turned on the netkit, to use one of the wall screens to talk to Terrey and the double and pursue my “amputation” plan, but it immediately informed me that I had a message from Lynn. I opened it.

“Michael, I've called you three times with no answer,” she said. “Is something going on? What's up? Call me back.”

I thought for a moment, to get my story straight, and called her back.

“Why didn't you answer?” she said. “I was getting scared.”

“Sorry, I had to step out for a few minutes.”

“I thought you couldn't leave the place where you are. Terrey told me that when he was trying to reassure me that you'd be okay.”

“I didn't leave the … building.” I almost said “house” before I stopped myself. “I just left the room and forgot to take my glasses with me.”

“You should have them with you at all times.”

“Yeah, I know. I'm sorry. Won't happen again.”

“When you do stuff like that, it makes me really want to know where you are.”

“Why did you call, Lynn?” I asked, ignoring her comment and hoping the issue would go away.

“That's actually why I called,” she said. “I was thinking, for this plan you and Terrey cooked up to work, you'd probably have to be staying with someone who could go out and get things for you.” There was the detective in her, at work again.

“Lynn, we've already agreed not to talk about this,” I said, then realized we really hadn't.

“And I can tell you're in a house,” she pressed ahead, “from what I can see behind you. So I'm worried.”

“What are you worried about, Lynn?”
Could she really be that good of a detective?

“Are you with that woman? I know she has a house in the Valley somewhere.”

“I am
not
with Tara, Lynn,” I said, glad that I could say something true. “I promise.”

“Good. But it made me think about her again. I had pushed it out of my mind when we were having trouble the last few years, but since things have been better lately, I guess I have enough courage or something now to ask. Have you been with her?”

“No, Lynn, I haven't. I promise.”

“Because I know she's still working at BASS, so you must see her at the castle.” She paused before the next part. “Does she have to be working there?”

“Actually, it's funny that you're asking about this,” I said, thinking quickly. “I was going to talk to Terrey first about it and then you, but since you brought it up, let's talk about it now. I have a plan for her to move on from BASS, now that I'm in charge.”

“So you
are
tempted by her,” she said.

“No, no, it's not like that,” I lied. “I just know it's hard for you, and I want to clear out anything that could come between us. From the past, you know.”

“So what's your plan?”

“Okay, but listen to the whole thing before you react,” I warned her. “First, I give Tara a promotion.”

“What?!”

“I said listen to the whole thing. Terrey said we can't put the double in the public eye much because the switch could be detected, with all the video that's shot and studied by the media, and maybe even our enemies. But we also don't want me to be conspicuous by absence. So he suggested that a way to deflect the problem would be for me to appoint a spokesperson, which BASS leaders have never had. The double could appear one time to appoint Tara, and then she could handle most of the communication while this is going on. That would keep the double off the net, in a way that seems to fit the normal flow of business.”

“Okay,” she said, “but how does it get her out of town?”

“I'll tell her that she needs to leave, but that I'm setting her up so well by this promotion, she'll be able to get any job she wants. When she puts her résumé out after earning this position, they'll be lined up offering her more than she ever dreamed of as an Internal Security Officer. Plus, she fits this job and will do it well.”