Just Like Me (4 page)

“Morning.” Dr. Phillips was bustling in class, wearing jeans and a black polo. He was a forty year old who still believed he could rock the attitude and fashion of a twenty year old.

The whole class mumbled in response. Dr. Phillips froze and looked at the class.

“MORNING!” He yelled. The class mumbled a little louder. “Better. Now if you don’t mind, pass the homework to the right of your row.”

A flurry of papers sounded through the room. Some students easily pulled out their homework assignment and passed it on. Some students were looking furiously through their binders in search of an assignment they probably didn’t do. Finally the flurry quieted and Dr. Phillips went around collecting the assignments.

“Thank-you!” He pounded the papers on his desk and stood back at the front of the class. “Now don’t forget we have a test next week on the weather patterns. Ok! So we left off talking about religions-“

He paused on his way to start the computer up. Geography sucks, but this guy is hilarious.

“I almost forgot!” He announced, thunking himself on the forehead. “I wanted to know who all is skipping tomorrow for that hottie search, or whatever. Raise of hands?”

Three fourths of the class raised their hands. Dr. Phillips started counting, and then stopped. The cute guy that sits next to me winked.

“Let’s try this a different way. How many of you are going to skip if it’s a woman?” A number of girls raised their hands and about half the guys. “Ok, if it’s a dude?” The majority of the girls raised their hands along with a few guys. Including my guy partner. “Alright, and now who’s skipping just for the hell of it?” Half the class raised their hands. “That’s what I thought. I’d like to say you probably shouldn’t skip tomorrow, lots of notes and stuff. Get up early and go mess around with that hide and go seek shit. This is more important. Not like that normal human being who has probably just been on a couple reality shows.”

A murmur went through the class, all excited about the prospect of a celebrity among us. You’d think Jesus was coming for the rapture.

“So! Let’s continue on with our lesson from last Friday.”

He turned on the computer and began teaching off of a power point, but my brain was whirling. How could these people be so excited? This is a person, a human being. If you shoot them, they will bleed. They’re swimming in money and keep it all for themselves, not willing to donate it to people who really need it. It’s sick, and these people act like celebrities are a gift from God. They see, they feel, they have houses and have to eat and crap like everyone else.

I glanced at the clock; this class gets out a three. This class was 2:10-3 on Thursdays and Fridays. I had another class on Monday and Wednesday from 2:30-3:45 that was literature, but she tends to let us out at 3:15. Lisa begged me to meet her at Bert’s again today so we could watch T.V. in the booth again. I had agreed, reluctantly. She really hoped it was going to be the Jude dude. Ha-ha. No matter how I had tried to discourage her she still wanted to look Friday. I didn’t have the heart to tell her they were going to shove that celebrity in an Ivy League type school. We’re in North Carolina in the middle of nowhere. The smallest university ever.

“Class dismissed.” Dr. Phillips announced, and everyone was scrambling to get to a T.V.

When I got to Bert’s, every booth was lined with people. It looks like Lisa had skipped her last class to snag one of the booths. She was sipping on a large sweet tea and watching the screen intently. I slid in opposite of her.

“I hope you didn’t waste an absence to grab a seat.”

“No, I just told my professor I had an appointment and cut out early.”

“Ben coming?”

“He’s in his last class. I told him I’d text him.”

“Ok, I might grab something to drink real quick.”

“No! No! Look!”

The Star Gaze host appeared back on the T.V., a face every college teenager across campus had come to know. Hey, there’s Joe…he could be my best friend I watch him so much.

“Welcome back to Star Gaze. I’m Joe, and it’s finally time to make an announcement about the Just Like Me competition! Joining us today is Harry, the president of the CAPT organization. Harry?”

“Thanks, Joe. Yes, it is finally time to announce a more official set of guidelines for all the hopeful college attendees and give out the name of the celebrity who agreed to be the first participant of the Just Like Me competition. We will allow students to begin searching at 5:30 a.m. tomorrow, Eastern Time, for the celebrity. Any students caught looking before then will automatically be disqualified. He could be anywhere-“

“He!” Lisa shrieked. “He said he! It’s a man! It’s a guy!” People in other booths shushed her.

“-student lounge, he could be sitting in the cafeteria. He could be walking around campus all day. You just need to find him. The first person who finds him will win this competition. Information about the winner will be immediately given to the media, this show especially, and the second we know something it will be released on to television. We hope to get information released as quickly as possible so students will know not to cut class on our account. We will give what college the celebrity was hiding at, the name of the winner, and will announce more about the night out when we have plans settled with the celeb and the winner. We also have a special app that you can download on your phone that will inform you the second the celebrity is found along with any other updates you may find helpful.”

“Thanks, Harry. Now, we will now announce what everyone has been anticipating. The celebrity taking place in this global competition is here in our studios, we will bring him on…right after this commercial break. Stay tuned.”

“Gah!” Lisa screamed, slamming her tea down on the table. “It’s a man! Why couldn’t they just announce it?? The suspense is killing me!”

“Are you really going to get up at 5:30?” I asked, tapping my fingernails on the tabletop.

“Yes! If Ben is ok with it. And last night he seemed fine with it.” She let out a breath; she was so excited about this. I just didn’t understand. I got up and headed over to the drink counter. Fountain drinks? Eh, I don’t drink soda. I grabbed a large cup and filled it to the brim with steaming coffee, added a couple creamers and sugars, then tossed the cashier a couple dollars and headed back over to our table. Lisa was biting her nails watching the commercials with extra vigor.

“Lisa, no matter who the hot guy might be…he’s not going to come here.”

“You never know!”

“How many colleges are in the world? Huh? Hundreds? Thousands? What are the odds that he’ll end up here?”

“It’s like winning the lottery; I’ll feel the crushing disappointment when my number doesn’t come up later. Now shush!”

Joe came back on the T.V. looking extra perky.

“Thanks for staying tuned. Now, before the break we said that we would announce the celebrity who is going to be the first participant of the Just Like Me competition. This competition is to prove that celebrities are just like you and I and that they don’t mind mingling among us common folk.”

“C’mon already!” Lisa yelled at the T.V.

“I don’t think they can hear ya, Lis.” I said, blowing on my coffee.

“So, without further ado, we bring to the stage…Taylor Jett!”

Screams from teenage girls echoed around the cafeteria. One girl even fainted and fell out of a booth. Lisa crunched the cup of tea in her hands and it went squirting all over the table.

“Lisa!” I yelled. I looked at my now sweet tea soaked t-shirt. I pulled at napkins desperately trying to mop up the super-sized sweet tea that had just spilled. Lisa was enticed by the dark headed guy that appeared on the screen. I looked up and the guy was grinning at the camera. He had a white t-shirt and black blazer combo, and his gaze was seductive and enticing.

“Hi everyone, I’m Taylor Jett. Most recently known for my part as Lewis in Zombie Grave, coming to theatres this November. I’ll be hiding on a college campus tomorrow, so start your search at 5:30 a.m. and help us support a college education for everyone. Don’t forget to get your tickets in advance for the third and final chapter of our zombie series entitled Zombie Grave.”

“Thanks so much for being on the show Taylor.”

“No, thank-you Joe.”

Harry came back on the T.V. to talk more about his organization and what it meant. I looked back at Lisa, her mouth was gaping open.

“I…cannot….believe this!” She hissed. She released her death grip on the now mutilated cup and pulled out her phone to text Ben. “I should have made him my number three!” She groaned at her own stupidity. “Why couldn’t I have kicked one of them off the list?? Just one of them! Why?!”

I shook my head, Taylor Jett was waving goodbye to the camera. That stupid arrogant grin was hitched on his face. What a jerk. I knew this was about publicity. He chose to do this so he could put more advertisement out for his stupid movie. I mean, he had said the name like fifty times while on air.

“It’s just a guy, Lisa.” I said, still trying to mop up the tea sea. “And he’s probably going to be at a college in New York or California, maybe even England or Australia or something.”

“But he’s Taylor Jett!” She whined. Her phone buzzed and she started jabbing at buttons furiously. “Ben’s not happy. He says I can’t look for Taylor Jett. Ugh! He just said last night I could!”

“Yea, that’s before he found out that your number four was going to be released into the wild.”

She tossed her cup into a garbage can and just shook her head, now staring at the T.V. that was airing a soap commercial.

“C’mon, Lisa. Like I said, he is not going to be here. Let’s head back to the dorm.”

I pretty much had to get up and drag her back to our room.

Lisa was pretty stone faced as she studied for her test in biology. The test was at 8:00, which the infamous Taylor Jett would probably be found by then. Every once in a while she’d stop to answer a text from Ben. She’d roll her eyes at some and not reply at all to others.

Around seven that night I got a text from Ben asking me to get her out of the room and on to the bridge so he could talk to her. I told him to give me a few minutes on the bridge with her, if I could even get her out there. He agreed and asked me to text him when I was finished talking.

“We’ve been stuck here since like four, you wanna go for a walk?”

A walk always implied we wouldn’t walk for long but end up at a small bridge overlooking the campus pond. Lisa glanced up from her biology book. Her blond hair was pulled back in a ponytail and her eye makeup was a little smudged.

“Yea, I could use a break from this crap.” She slammed the text book shut and rolled off the bed. She trudged to her closet to pull on a light jacket. I pulled my jacket off the back of my chair and we walked out of the hall, her locking the door behind us.

It was a warm night. We both ended up shedding our jackets by the time we got to the bridge. Trees were just turning brilliant shades of orange. The one thing about this campus is that it would look dead in the winter. Back home we had pine trees that stayed green all year. It was nice to see green amongst the dead. But no, here everything had to die.

We arrived at the bridge and the lamp posts were being turned on. A few people were trudging through campus. Some on their way to night classes, others on a late coffee or fast food run. We both hitched ourselves to the railing of the bridge and glanced over at the fish that danced just below surface. Orange and white and black fish bubbled and shimmied everywhere beneath us. Lisa spit into the water, making me cringe. All of the fish then scurried towards the place her saliva had fallen. What they thought was food was a trick and they all dispersed immediately afterward.

“This thing with this star…it’s nothing to get upset about, Lisa.” I started, trying to find a way to make peace with this situation. “He’s not going to be here. You’re getting into an argument with Ben for no good reason. He loves you and doesn’t want you gallivanting off after some celebrity. How would you be feeling right now if Gianna Renaldi had appeared on that show tonight? And Ben was begging you to go out looking for her?”

She gave a half-hearted laugh, still staring at the fish.

“Guess I wouldn’t be too thrilled.”

“Would you want Ben to get excited and ask to go find her? To go on a date night with her?”

She gave that some thought, unwilling to admit she wouldn’t like it.

“I wouldn’t just shut him down.”

“But you wouldn’t be happy.”

“No.”

“So…how about you and Ben just forget about this competition all together? I say screw the To Do list…no pun attended…and just focus on each other. You’ve been together almost a year, that’s great. Maybe you should be thinking about stuff like…if you’d want to marry him or whatever. But don’t throw all that away over some dude that’s going to show up at an Ivy League college tomorrow.”

She nodded, pressing her lips together awkwardly.

              I texted Ben letting him know he could come up to the bridge. We stood there for a minute, still watching the fish play. It didn’t take long for Ben to show up. He cleared his throat and started walking up the bridge. Lisa looked up and saw him, keeping her eyes on him as he drew closer.

“Can we…talk?” He asked, looking uncomfortable. Ben found it unsettling how much Lisa and I knew about each other, including Lisa and Ben’s relationship. I’m not sure if he had finally accepted it, or just knew I wasn’t going anywhere.

“Yea, I think we should.” She made a move to walk off the bridge, but I held up my hands.

“I’m going to go grab a coffee. You two stick around here.”

They didn’t argue as I made my descent down the bridge. I could hear them murmuring together as I started down the painted bricks toward the small coffee shop on campus. Third-wheeling felt awkward sometimes, I’m often uncomfortable with some of the situations Lisa and Ben find themselves in.

I watched as groups started emerging around campus, smoking cigarettes and howling. Making fools of themselves. A clique of girls was hanging out right outside the doors of the coffee house, talking about Taylor Jett.

“If I find him, I bet you he’ll marry me.”

“Ugh! No way! I’m so totally going to find him tomorrow.”

“Guys…what if he’s not here?”

“No! Don’t even say that! That’s too awful to even think about!”

Oh my God. Someone shoot me.

“You’re right, he’s gotta be here. And if he is, I’m totally going to screw him.”

Better yet, shoot them.

I walked into the coffee shop, sticking my hand in my pocket trying to dig for my debit card. Fishing it out I took a gaze at the menu, trying to decide if I wanted a hot or cold coffee. It probably won’t be this warm for a while…so I probably should go for a blended cold drink. Or an iced coffee, that would be really good right now. The place was empty, coffee isn’t popular at night. Just hanging outside of the coffee house, I guess.

I walked up to the cashier still not taking my eyes off the menu.

I heard the door to the coffee house creak open and someone stood in line behind me. I glanced back briefly to see a guy who had his hood up and sunglasses on. What a weirdo, it’s freaking dark and he’s wearing his sunglasses. Not only that, but it’s a warm night, and this dude has a hoodie on. What an idiot.

“Going to order any time soon?”

I heard the guy say behind me. I paid little attention to him and took my sweet time going over every flavor on the menu, even though I already knew what I wanted. I heard him sigh impatiently.

“I think I’ll have an iced mocha. Medium sized, please.” I go to hand her my card but the guy behind me stepped in front.

“I’ve got it.” He offers her some cash. She looks at me, confused, and then takes the cash. It looked like he handed over a twenty.

“Um. I can pay for my own coffee.” I said, trying to extend my card to the cashier. She looked helpless, staring at both of us.

“I’d like to treat you.” He flicks his hands at the cashier. “Keep the change.”

I glare at him.

“Name?” She asks me.

“Kale.”

She wrote my name on the cup and handed it over to the girl making coffee. The guy behind me stepped up and ordered. He was tan, but I couldn’t tell his eye color or his hair color because of the sunglasses and hoodie. There’s something unnerving about him. I think I’ve seen him on campus before. I think maybe he’s in my geography class.

“I want a large hot skinny vanilla coffee with an extra shot of sugar-free vanilla, no whip, skim milk.” He hands the cashier another twenty. What an arrogant bastard.

“Name?” She asks, dazed and looking at the twenty like it’s a foreign object to her. The guy turns to me and smiles.

“What do you want it to be?” He asked. I glared at him. He rolled his head in a slight circular motion, obviously irritated. I’m pretty sure that was a big eye roll. “C’mon, I don’t have all night.”

“How about asshole?”

“Don’t you have any decency in your soul? I just paid for your coffee and you call me an asshole.”

I hesitate and blurt out the first name that comes to my mind.

“Taylor.” I said. Then I blushed. I groaned inwardly. Now this idiot is going to think I’m one of those teens that are head over heels in love with that moron actor.

But he grinned as he looked at the cashier.

“You heard the lady, Taylor it is.”

Something about the grin unnerves me. The coffee maker announced my name and I snatched up my coffee, walking fast for the door.

“Aren’t you going to say thanks?” I heard him call after me.

“Thanks.” I mumble, pushing my way out of the glass door. The last thing I heard him say as I exited was “Keep the change.”