Authors: Meredith Russell
With stern eyes, Ruby looked at Leo, and it was clear Leo didn’t have the energy to argue.
Spinning on his stool, he faced Jack and asked, “Would you like to go for a drink sometime?”
Jack sucked on his teeth. He was taking too long to give an answer and he knew it.
Shit
. “Sure. Why not?”
Ruby looked victorious, the man behind her gave a despairing look, and Leo looked like he was going into shock.
“There ya go.” Ruby pushed Leo by the shoulder. Pleased with herself, she then plucked a straw from the box on the bar and turned her attention to her drink.
“I am so sorry,” Leo mouthed.
Jack grinned and shrugged off the concern. Taking a napkin from behind the bar, he jotted down his digits and handed it to Leo. “No pressure. But if you do want to meet up for a drink or a chat, call me.”
“I will.” There was color in Leo’s cheeks. His pale complexion from earlier had vanished, almost like he’d thawed from whatever icy grip had taken hold of him.
Nodding, Jack made his excuses and left the bar, heading out back. Stepping from sight, he leaned against the wall and rubbed his hands over his face. What was he playing at? He didn’t hand out his cell number or agree to go for drinks with men just like that. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.
Forget about it. Leo probably already has
. Jack opened his eyes and stared at the wall opposite him. He couldn’t figure out what had his head in such a mess: the thought that Leo might call him, or the fact that he might not.
Why should I care if he calls?
“Problem?” Abe was standing in the doorway beside him.
Jack took a deep breath and composed himself. “No problem.”
There was a look in his friend’s eyes. He knew Jack better than to press further, or at least he should have.
“Who’s the guy?” Abe glanced over his shoulder to where Jack assumed Leo and his friends were still sitting.
“No one,” Jack lied.
Abe folded his arms, stepped out of view of the bar, and leaned against the wall beside Jack. “Is everythin’ okay, man? You seem…” Abe shrugged. “Different somehow.”
“Different?” Jack snorted a laugh. He hadn’t done ‘different’ in a long time.
Abe wore a frown as he studied Jack. Whatever change he thought he saw, he obviously couldn’t put a name to it. “Okay,” he said. Jack had a reprieve for the time being. “Don’t think I’m leavin’ it there. Take your miserable face off to the refrigerators. The elephant needs to be finished for collection tomorrow at noon. We’ll talk later.”
“There’s nothing to talk about.” There was no weight behind Jack’s protest, and he wondered why he even bothered.
“Later,” Abe said and headed back to the bar.
When Abe was gone, Jack held his hand out in front of him. Slowly, he turned it over, examining his palm and the back of his hand. Unnerved, he balled his shaking hand into a fist. What the hell was going on?
Chapter 8
Leo sat at one of the small round tables in the office kitchen and rested his forehead in his hand.
“Poor baby,” Ruby said. There was no actual sympathy for his self-inflicted state. She and Nathan had taken it upon themselves to tease him at every opportunity.
“Thanks,” he muttered and soothed his cool fingers over his brow, grazing the scabbed-over cut from yesterday’s misadventure. He had a pounding head and still felt sick despite hugging the toilet at four that morning. The memory had him desperately suppressing the urge to gag.
“You know what would fix you right up? A greasy bacon roll.”
Leo’s top lip twitched. He couldn’t face food, not yet. “Maybe later.”
Ruby chuckled and sipped her coffee. “When is the presentation?”
“Couple of hours.” Plenty of time to shake off his hangover.
“Have you seen him yet?” Ruby lowered her voice, even though they were the only two people in the kitchen.
Leo shook his head. He was torn between wanting to put off the inevitable and just ripping the bandage off and confronting Mac. At least if he got facing Mac out of the way, it might be one less reason for the nauseous grip on his stomach.
“He sent me a text message this morning.”
“And?” Ruby raised her eyebrows.
The message had been cold and formal. “It was about work. Nothing else.”
What had he expected? Or more importantly, what had he wanted Mac to say? Leo’s head was a mess. He’d pretty much run himself in circles trying to figure out what he wanted. One minute he was so sure it was all over between him and Mac. The man had cheated on him, and it hadn’t been the first time. But then Leo remembered all the good times when it was just the two of them, the laughter and the tender moments.
“Don’t you dare forgive him.” Ruby looked at him pointedly. She knew Leo still held on to the picture-perfect image in his head of what his relationship had been like with Mac.
Leo didn’t answer her. Even if he forgave Mac, he wasn’t sure he’d ever forget, not this time. This wasn’t office gossip, this wasn’t Mac confessing months down the line about a faceless fling on a business trip or an intern who was long gone. Leo had walked in on Mac getting a blow job. That image was an unwanted memory burned prominently into his mind.
“Hey.” Ruby rested her hand over his on the table.
With a sniffed laugh, he slid his hand from hers. “Don’t want to start any rumors.”
“Honey, I know this hurts now, but it’s for the best.”
How did she know what was for the best? Three years he’d put into him and Mac. Was it really that easy to just throw it all away?
Mac was able to
.
“I need a piss.” The chair legs made a grating sound as he pushed his seat back. He squeezed Ruby’s shoulder as he walked behind her.
Alone in the bathroom, he stood in front of the mirror over the basin. What he wouldn’t give for a cold, wet flannel. He lowered his head and turned on the faucet. He watched the water for a moment, then closed his eyes. The sound of the water running into the drain was weirdly soothing. Holding his hands under the faucet, he enjoyed the sense of calm that washed over him, or he did while it lasted. The bathroom door opened, and Leo raised his head. Any peace he’d found was quickly dispelled at the sight of Mac standing behind him in the mirror.
“Hey,” Mac said. He pushed the door closed behind him and stepped forward. “I hoped we could talk.”
Leo met Mac’s eyes. Shaking his hands, he turned off the water and reached for a paper towel. “I’m not sure now’s a good time.”
“Well, I am.” Mac looked at him firmly.
Sighing, Leo turned around and leaned back against the basin. “You’re about to give a presentation to the CEOs and you think now’s a good time to talk?”
Mac pressed his hands together and chewed on his lip. He moved toward Leo and, after tapping his fingertips together, awkwardly touched Leo’s shoulders, barely making contact, as if he might be burned. “We need to fix this. You were upset, I get that.”
“Upset? Try livid, embarrassed, mortified.”
Mac ran his finger and thumb down the collar of Leo’s shirt. “I love you.” His voice was low and seductive as he smoothed his hands over Leo’s. “You’re going to throw what we had away, just like that?”
Leo reached for the basin behind him, welcoming the cool, solid surface. He’d thought maybe Mac was going to apologize. Guess he was wrong.
“I thought you loved me.”
With a sniffed laugh, Leo shook his head in disbelief. How could Mac even pretend this was Leo’s fault? “And I thought you loved me. Guess we were both wrong.”
“I’m an idiot. I know that. You know that. And you also know I do love you.”
Leo closed his eyes as Mac dared to stroke his arms. He could feel Mac’s touch, warm through the material of his shirt. He felt cornered, trapped. Mac was taller than him, a couple of inches over six foot, but those extra inches were intimidating with Mac so close.
“You can get past this.”
Opening his eyes, Leo looked into Mac’s hazel eyes. “That’s the thing, though. I shouldn’t have to.”
Mac went to say more, but shut his mouth when the bathroom door opened and Nathan walked in.
“Oh, hey, sorry. I can come back…” Nathan waved his hand toward the door.
“Yeah, could you?” Mac said flatly.
“It’s okay.” Leo slid from between Mac and the basin. “We’re done.”
Mac tensed his jaw, but when Nathan didn’t leave, he chose to instead.
Nathan flinched when Mac’s hands slapped the back of the door. “Charming as always.” Nathan glanced at Leo and raised one of his dark eyebrows. “Quite the catch you had there.”
“Weird thing is, I didn’t think he’d care.”
Nathan joined him at the sinks. “Care?”
“Enough to want me back.”
Nathan leaned back, dipping his head as he offered his opinion. “Do you know what most guys really want?”
Was that a trick question? “Sex?”
Laughing, Nathan shook his head. “Well, there is that, but mainly they want what they can’t have.” He folded his arms and expanded on his theory. “If he had you, he’d be looking for that next thing, that something different or better or younger or more exciting.”
“So he wants me because he can’t have me?”
“Basically. Plus you’ve been his safe zone for years. Always there to play with when he feels like it.”
Leo looked up at the ceiling. When had safe become a bad thing? With ‘safe’ came security and love. Or that had been how he envisaged their relationship. He studied Nathan, who had remained at his side, though they had fallen into silence. Did Nathan want for more than he had? He and Ruby always seemed so much in love.
“Is Ruby your safe? Do you look for more?”
With a smile, Nathan took a moment to think about his answer. “Honestly, Ruby is safe, but then again, she isn’t. She challenges me and amazes me every day.”
“So you don’t look?”
Nathan grinned. “I’m a red-blooded male, of course I look. But the difference between Mac and me is I would never dream of touching. I’m more than happy with what I have, who I have. We went through hell to get here, and I would never do anything to jeopardize us. She is my everything.” Nathan blew out a breath and turned to Leo. “Right, are we supposed to hug or something now?”
Laughing, Leo pushed Nathan away. He pressed his hand to his forehead and lifted his bangs. The laughter faded, and he was left with the stark realization he was walking away from someone he’d considered ‘safe’. “Can you promise me something?”
“Sure.” Nathan settled back against the basin beside Leo and looked at him curiously.
“Don’t let me go back to him.” He met Nathan’s eyes. Leo wouldn’t consider himself a weak person, but he had always been someone who found it hard to walk away. He just wanted everyone to be happy, to please everybody all the time. Too damn sweet, his mother had added to the mental list she kept on him. Too sweet, too sensitive, too quick to fall in love—she’d always warned him about people taking advantage, and considering his current situation, he guessed he should have paid more attention to his fruit loop mom.
“I promise. Besides, Ruby would kill me, then you, and probably Mac for good measure.” He bumped his shoulder with Leo’s. “You’ll be okay; you know that, right?”
Leo pursed his lips. “I guess.”
“And if you’re not, well, you have me and Ruby.” Nathan screwed up his mouth thoughtfully. “Or you could go see your mom.”
Leo snorted a laugh at the mention. Since she divorced Leo’s dad, his mom had taken an obsessive interest in all that New Age stuff. Her house was filled with crystals, and wind chimes and strings of shells hung all around her porch. She was happier than she had been in years. Leo figured that was the important thing, no matter how much he and his sister doubted the true healing powers and sense of wellbeing achieved from running a stick around a singing bowl. Maybe he should head downstate and let her play him whale songs and send him home with dream catchers to hang above his bed. Who knew, it might help. And if all that failed, a hug from his mom could fix anything, right?
“Thanks.” It meant a lot to have his friends around. “Right.” He slapped his thighs and stood up straight. “I really need to get things together for this meeting.” He was ready. He could do this. He still needed to pee.
* * * * *
Leo stepped out of the meeting room and it was like he could breathe again. Glancing over his shoulder, he watched Mac continue his conversations with the board members. On the whole, the presentation had gone well, and everyone seemed keen to move on the ideas Mac had put forward. It was time to take a chance, time for change, time to look to the future.
Mac met Leo’s eyes, and Leo looked away. Mac might not realize it, but his words were like a wake-up call for Leo, and only went to prove that it was time to call quits on their relationship for good. He had gotten angry, he’d shed some tears, he’d threatened to kick love to the curb forever, but he was stronger than that and he shouldn’t be scared of putting his heart out there.
“So?” Ruby said. She hooked an arm around his waist and guided him to one side. “How’d it go?”
Leo took a relaxing breath. “It was okay. They seem on board.” He chewed on his thumbnail as he verbalized a decision he had made off the back of the meeting. “I’m going to request to move off the team.”
“Really?”
As great as the opportunity was, Leo just wanted to try and get back to normal, to disappear among the many office cubicles for a while.
“It’s for the best. There’ll be other projects.” For now, he was happy to be part of the crowd.
“So that’s it. You and he are officially done.”
Ruby’s statement caused a twinge in Leo’s chest. But yes, they were done.
“Do you still have that napkin?” Ruby asked with a grin.
“Ruby…”
“What? Come on. I think you deserve a little fun.”
Leo shrugged. He felt weird about the whole chance encounter thing he and Jack had found themselves in. “I don’t know. It’s a bit weird, isn’t it? I don’t know anything about him.”
Clearly frustrated by his obtuse behavior, Ruby punched him in the arm. “That’s why you give him a call, go for a drink, and ask lots of stupid questions. What’s your favorite color? Seen any good movies lately? Are you a sneaky, cheating bastard in your spare time?” She smiled sweetly, obviously pleased with her last remark.