Just for Now (20 page)

“Nothing about this thing we have is a bad thing. I’m not gonna lie about it: I don’t deserve you. I’m sure as hell not good enough for you, but as long as you want me, I’m all yours.”

That wasn’t a proclamation of love, but it was as close as I would ever get with Preston. I knew enough about his past to know he’d never been serious about any girl.

“Is this thing with us going to be exclusive? Or is it just a thing . . .” I trailed off, not sure how to word this. I didn’t want to say “just sex,” because it wasn’t about the sex. We were more than that, or at least I thought so.

“Hell yes, it’s exclusive. You can’t date anyone else, Manda. I can’t deal with it. I was ready to rip a guy’s arms off for talking to you tonight.”

This was a two way street.

“Um, and you . . . is it exclusive for you?” I asked tentatively. I knew if he couldn’t tell me yes, I wouldn’t be able to do this. I was in too deep emotionally.

Preston grinned. He ran his hand through my hair and cupped the back of my head. “Baby, all I see is you. It’s something I’ve never experienced, but I can’t see anyone else anymore. Just you.”

My heart slammed against my chest. Preston pulled my head close enough that his lips could touch mine. I knew his face was sore, so I kissed him back softly. I didn’t want to hurt him.

“Manda, I want you,” he whispered against my lips.

Those weren’t the three words I wanted to hear from him. but they were a very close second. I eased off his lap and stood in front of him while I reached back and unzipped my sundress and let it fall to the floor.

“Sweet Jesus,” Preston whispered.

I hadn’t worn a bra with my sundress, and I’d worn a pair of the skimpiest panties I had. I was bending down to take off my boots when Preston leaned forward and grabbed my arm.

“Leave the boots on.”

“How am I going to get my panties off?”

He flashed me a wicked grin, then grabbed both my legs and pulled me in between his. Running his hands up my legs, he slipped both hands under the thin strings holding my panties up, and with one hard jerk they fell off me.

“I don’t even want to know how you knew how to do that.”

“I’ll replace them. I’ll buy you a bunch just like them,” he promised, pulling me down onto his lap as he removed the towel he was wearing.

Chapter Eighteen

Preston

“Can we do it this way?” Amanda asked nervously as she straddled my lap.

God, she was so damn innocent. Knowing I’d been the only one ever to touch her, to be inside her, to taste her, made my insane possessiveness worse. I wanted to keep her close. Away from everyone else.

“Yes, sweetheart, it feels real good this way,” I assured her as I held her hips. “You’ll have all the control.”

I leaned forward and pulled one of her nipples into my mouth. They were right there, teasing me. I couldn’t ignore them. I was pretty damn sure I was addicted to them. She arched her back and let out a soft moan.

“I want it in,” she pleaded.

I smiled up at her. “Then put it in.”

Her eyes went wide with surprise, and then she slowly lowered her body until the tip of my erection touched the entrance we both wanted it in so badly.

“Do I just go down?” she asked, looking back up at me.

If I wasn’t so incredibly turned on, I would have laughed. “Yeah, just go down on it.” I liked the way that sounded.

She bit her bottom lip as she eased down on it.

“Ah, that’s so good,” I groaned as she teased us both by going slow.

“Yeah,” she panted, “it is.”

She paused, and I wanted so badly to thrust up, but I held back. This was going to be all her. “Do I keep going?” She was breathing fast and hard, making her tits bounce gently in my face. God, it didn’t get any better than this.

“All the way down,” I assured her.

She sank down all the way, and my hips bucked on their own accord, causing her to cry out.

“Fuck, baby,” I growled as her muscles inside squeezed my dick.

“Ohgod. It feels so good,” she said, throwing her head back and giving me complete access to her pretty neck. I leaned forward and kissed and licked several soft spots before she started to move. Lifting her hips, she said, “I wanna move.”

“Up and down, baby. As fast or slow as you want to. It’s your ride.”

“Oh,” she breathed, her eyes going wider at my words.

She eased up, and I had to fist my hands at my sides to keep from taking over. This was making me fucking crazy. Flipping her on her back and pumping in and out of her until we both screamed out in release was very tempting. But then, watching her experience this for the first time was something I’d never forget.

“Preston,” she breathed.

“Yeah, baby?”

“Can I go faster? I think I wanna go faster.”

Ah, hell yeah. “You ride me as fast and hard as you want to. If it feels good to you, it feels just as amazing to me. I promise. You can’t do this wrong.”

She nodded and placed both her hands on my shoulders, then eased up off me and sank back down quickly. “AH!”

She did it again, harder this time. It was the most amazing thing I’d ever felt. It was hotter inside than before, and softer. . . .

SHIT!

I wasn’t wearing a condom. Shit, shit,
shit
.

I grabbed her waist as she started getting her rhythm and stopped her.

“No, please,” she begged, sinking back down on me. “Yes, oh God, Preston.”

Fuck me. How was I going to stop this?

She lifted her hips and sank back down on me hard, then cried out again. She was so close. If I wasn’t positive I’d shoot off like a damn cannon when she came, I’d let her finish first.

“Manda, I gotta put on a condom.”

She didn’t stop like I’d expected. She lifted her hips faster and rocked back and forth this time while making sexy little moans that were gonna push me over the edge.

“Manda, a condom, baby. I forgot a condom.”

“S’okay. I’m on the pill,” she said before pressing down harder and rocking her hips back and forth.

Why the fuck was she on the pill?

“Preston, AH! Preston,” she cried out, grabbing my shoulder and leaning forward as she began trembling in my lap.

I couldn’t hold back. I wrapped both my arms around her and buried my head in her shoulder as I shot off my release inside her.

Amanda

I didn’t want to move. Ever. Preston was inside me. I was completely satisfied, and his mouth was nibbling at my neck. No wonder girls in high school liked sex so much. Nothing I’d ever done under the covers in my bed felt like this.

“Why are you on the pill?” Preston asked against my neck.

Smiling, I arched my neck a little more so he could cover more skin.

“Irregular, really bad periods. I’ve been on the pill since I was sixteen.”

I’d never thought the fact that I took that little pill every day would come in so handy.

“I’ve never had sex without a condom before,” he said, tilting his head back to look at me. “Being inside you with nothing between us was the best experience of my life.”

My body felt warm all over. Knowing he’d enjoyed it as much as I had made it even better.

Preston leaned forward and kissed me. “It isn’t safe though. As good as that felt we can’t do that again. We need to protect you.. I have protection. Can we do this again?"

“If you’re a very good boy,” I teased.

His hands slipped down my back until they were caressing my bottom. “I can be real good. So damn good you’ll want to strip for me all the time.”

Giggling, I shifted my hips and felt him still semi-hard inside me. Oh.

“Manda, if you don’t get off me, we are gonna have to have a round two real soon.”

I wiggled a little more on his lap, and this time he laughed. “You’re going to kill me. Death by sex with the hottest woman on the planet. That’s one helluva way to go.”

A knock at the door startled me, and Preston tensed underneath me. I looked from the door to him, and he lifted me off his lap. Then handed me a towel. “Go on in the bathroom and take a shower.”

I was worried it could be Marcus. I didn’t want him hurting Preston any more. I wrapped the towel around me and stood there.

Preston pointed to the bathroom, and I shook my head. “It could be Marcus.”

Preston laughed. “Well, you standing there like that ain’t gonna help matters if it is.”

“You can’t answer the door naked,” I pointed out.

He looked down at himself and smirked. “No, I can’t.” Then he headed for the bedroom. Another knock and a “I know you’re in there. Open the damn door” told us it was Dewayne.

Preston came walking out of the bedroom in a pair of sweats and pointed to the bathroom. “It’s Dewayne, and we both know he ain’t here to kick my ass. Go take a shower, and don’t come out in a towel.”

Smiling, I walked into the bathroom and closed the door behind me.

Pressing my ear to the door, I listened to see what Dewayne wanted before I turned the water on. He could be here to warn us Marcus was on the way.

“She in here?” Dewayne asked.

“Word travels fast.”

Dewayne let out a bark of laughter. “Hell yeah, it does. You messing around with Marcus’s sister, that’s screwed up. Even for you.”

“Shut up, D. What do you want, other than to see if Amanda is here?”

“Ah, you know, the usual. You got Marcus ready to pound in anyone’s head who looks at him the wrong way. Rock and I have to keep him from getting thrown in jail. So I need to know, are you just fucking her, or is this more than that?”

“It’s Amanda, D. Don’t say that. Ever.”

There was a pause. “So Rock was right. For you to mess around with Manda, it has to be for a bigger reason. She got to you.”

“I’ve been attracted to her for a couple of years now, but she was too young. She’s not anymore, and I . . . It’s different with her. Everything is different.”

Hearing him admit that it was different with me eased the worry that he might never love me. Just to know he felt something.

“I’d say it was your business, but since we were kids if something goes wrong with one of us, then it is everyone’s business. Just be careful. I know shit you probably don’t know I know. It ain’t the kind of thing relationships are built on. And Manda ain’t the kind of girl you just use for a little while.”

“I
know
that. Don’t you think I fucking know that?”

Another moment of silence, and then the front door opened and closed. I stepped back and took a deep breath.

The bathroom door swung open, and Preston walked inside with a wicked grin on his face. “Since you waited on me while you listened in on that conversation, I think I’ll help get you clean and you can show off those singing abilities of yours in the shower. I’ve been waiting all damn day to hear them.”

Chapter Nineteen

Preston

Letting Amanda go home was hard. I wanted to keep her here. Every time she walked out my door, I worried that she wouldn’t come back. That she’d find out the truth about me. Tonight was family dinner at her house. She said her brother had told her that he didn’t want her to tell their mom. She wasn’t emotionally stable enough to deal with it.

I didn’t expect her mother to accept me. She knew I was from the wrong side of town. She knew I’d gotten in trouble all through high school and Marcus had helped bail me out. I was Marcus’s charity case in her eyes. I’d never be good enough for her daughter.

My phone vibrated in my pocket, reminding me of my appointment. Every time I had to go work, I loathed it more. I’d started looking in the paper every day for a job that could pay me enough to take care of the kids and fit into my schedule with classes and baseball season when it started up. So far there was nothing. I wasn’t qualified for anything. But I wasn’t giving up. I had to find a way out of this. I wanted to be worthy of Amanda, and I knew I never would be as long as I continued doing what I was doing.

I reached over and picked up my keys. I had to go do this. If I wanted to keep my scholarship and feed the kids, I had to do this.

*   *   *

I walked up the back steps to the three-story brick house that belonged to our illustrious mayor. He was shagging his secretary and his wife was paying me for the same service. She had been for over a year now.

I had to park half a mile down the road and walk up from the back of the house and use the back door. She’d leave it unlocked.

Opening the door, I went inside and headed for the stairs. Sometimes she waited on me in some ridiculous piece of lingerie, and sometimes she was just upstairs in bed naked, drinking wine. Depended on her mood.

I reached the first step and heard voices. That couldn’t be good. She was always alone when she called me. I froze and listened. It was another woman. I recognized the voice, but I couldn’t put my finger on who it was. Surely she hadn’t invited over another one of my clients for a threesome. I charged extra for that, and right now I wasn’t sure I could pull it off. Getting up for just her was going to be hard enough. I was having to close my eyes and pretend lately. It was the only thing that worked.

“I’ll see you at the committee meeting next week, then. Thank you, Janice, for offering to help. Having your name behind it will always drive more volunteers.” Janice was the mayor’s wife. This was an impromptu visit she was dealing with, and they were coming around the corner. Shit.

I’d started to make a run for it when Mrs. Hardy turned the corner and our eyes met.
Fucking hell.

Janice’s eyes found me, and they went wide with surprise. She hadn’t been expecting us to get caught either.

I stood there unable to move from this train wreck. How did I explain this? I didn’t need this woman to know what I did. I was going to find another job, and when I did, I was going to make myself worthy of Amanda. Her mother knowing this dirty secret of mine would ruin everything. She’d tell Amanda. If she ever found out about Amanda and me, she’d tell her.