Just Breathe Trilogy Box Set (43 page)

“I’ll be fine. Anything to help Nathaniel’s,” I assure unconvincingly.

“Emma?” he questions with worry.

“Everything’s fine,” I lie.

“Emma . . .” he pushes, not believing me.

“What?”

“You know you can talk to me,” he offers, taking my iPad from me.

“I know,” I confirm.

“What’s really bothering you?” he searches, wrapping his arms around me as I curl into his chest.

“What are you talking about?” I deny while searching to see what he may have seen.

“He clearly likes you,” he mentions calmly.

“Who? Chris? I know that. I’ll deal with him the night of the event. I couldn’t put the man in his place in front of everyone today,” I concur.

“I know. Chris clearly isn’t taking the hint, but I was referring to Joe.”

“What about Joe?”

“You didn’t see his reaction when you agreed to go to the premier with Chris, at lunch, and then when Chris planted a kiss on you to say goodbye?” Jared says with a little shock in his voice.

“What are you talking about?”

I know what he’s talking about, but I’ve got to deny anything and everything, even to my best friend.

“Nothing . . .” he says, trying to end it.

“What?” I press.

I need to know what he knows or at least know what he thinks.

“Nothing . . .” he repeats.

I drop pushing the subject, though I’m not sure why Jared brought up the topic of Joe’s reaction. What has he seen? What does he know? I might need to back off from being around Joe as much just to throw off my friends. I might have to pretend to want to go out to satisfy my itch. Damn it.

“I know Nathan might have said a few things that may be leading Chris to believe you’re interested or there’s a chance with you,” Jared comments, changing back to the main topic of discussion.

I outwardly wince.

“Nathan means well. He just wants everything to . . .” Jared continues before I cut him off.

“I know. Nathan’s worried that if Chris doesn’t think there’s a chance with me that he might not wear the suit and then there goes the opportunity of Nathaniel’s getting noticed on the red carpet,” I confirm Nathan’s intentions.

“Yeah . . . .” Jared confirms.

“Where’s my favorite person in the world?” Nathan’s voice sings from the living room.

“In here,” Jared replies.

“Okay, my second favorite person . . .” Nathan corrects himself as he appears in the doorway.

Jared and I just glance at him. “Uhh . . . here,” I comment, suspecting he’s referring to me.

“There you are,” he beams with excitement. “I love you!”

“I know. I love you too.”

“No. I really love you. I know how hard this is and will be with Chris and Joe . . . I mean . . .” he adjusts his words.

I see a look from Jared after Nathan says Joe’s name as he slides onto the bed on his belly.

“What about Joe . . .” I seek.

I know there’s something that they aren’t telling me.

“Nothing . . . I just meant Chris. I know you don’t like him like that and I really appreciate your willingness to . . .” his stops, searching for the right words.

“Lead Chris on so he won’t back out of the agreement,” I answer for him bluntly.

“Something like that,” he confirms.

“I’m doing it for you . . . because I love you and you are family. Plus, it’s a needed business transaction,” I comment.

“I know, and that’s why I love you,” Nathan repeats, hugging me. Nathan asks, “Please don’t be mad at me for . . . .”

“For what?”

“Continuing to lead Chris on,” he admits sheepishly.

“It’s okay . . .” my voice trails a little. “I’ll do my best to play along and say nothing until that night.”

Nathan and I don’t really say anything else after our quick verbal airing of the life-size elephant challenge that will be occurring until the premier is over. He stays with Jared and me, petting and playing with Sadie on occasion before giving Jared and I some much-needed friend time.

Jared hands me back my iPad, but stays with me for a long while. We don’t talk. We just fall back into our old habits of when we used to live together, sitting quietly just being there for the other. Jared runs his fingers through my hair; one of my favorite things he’s always done.

Needing some fresh air before bed, and still unable to fall asleep at eleven-thirty at night, I take Sadie out for a walk on Ocean Drive. Almost back to Nathan’s, my phone buzzes.

“Hi,” I answer, trying not to sound too excited.

“Hey, beautiful,” he returns with his low, husky voice.

“What’s with the sexy voice?” I ask.

“What sex voice?” he chuckles.

“You know what I’m talking about . . . you know what you’re doing.” I reply.

He laughs. “Do you like it?”

“No comment . . .” I return playfully.

“So you do,” he accuses. “I’ll have to make a point to do it again in the future.”

“How was the rest of your day?” I redirect our conversation.

“Good. Yours?”

“Good.”

We don’t say anything. Well, I don’t say anything as I enter Nathan’s condo and head back to my room.

“What are you up to?” he inquires.

“Just getting back into Nathan’s,” I whisper, not wanting to be overheard.

“Took Sadie out?”

“Yeah. What are you still doing up?” I close the door to the bedroom.

“Wanted to hear you voice before I fall asleep,” he sweetly admits.

A weird feeling surfaces in my belly. I’m not sure what it equate it to. Maybe, it’s like the feeling I got as a kid the night before Christmas when my parents were still alive. I’m not sure why, but I like it. It reminds me of happy times and happy feelings that have been long lost.

“What are you up to?” I peruse.

“Laying in bed. Thinking of you,” he says, using the sexy voice again.

“Mmmm,” I hum.

“Is that for what I said or how I said it . . . or both,” he questions.

“Hmmm . . . I think I’ll keep that to myself for now,” I taunt.

“So that’s how you want to be?” he quips.

“A girl can’t share all her secrets,” I muse.

He chuckles. “No. I guess not . . . but you are giving me enough.”

“Enough?”

“Yeah, enough to work with,” he devilishly stabs.

“What do you mean?”

“A guy can’t share all his secrets,” he returns with his husky voice.

“I see how it is,” I reply with my own provocative tone.

I’m thoroughly enjoying the banter. It’s turning me on.

“Keep that up and I’ll be driving over to Nathan’s,” he directs.

“What?” I feign my actions and words.

“You’re tempting me to come over and show you, not caring who’s there,” he shares.

I redden at the thought. Would he really do that? Would I mind? No. Not Really. Okay, maybe part of me for letting people know, but I’m so horny right now that I’m so tempted to provoke him to see if he really does it. Besides, even if he did come over, that doesn’t mean I’d let him in.

“We need to start using FaceTime,” he declares.

“Why?”

I know why, but I just want to hear him say it.

“So I can see your reaction. It’s killing me when you don’t say anything,” he explains.

“Why? What do you mean?” My brow furrows a little at his statement.

“I can guess easier at what you’re thinking when I see you compared to this. This is torture, but texting is even worse,” he admits.

Biting my lip, I can’t help but laugh out loud a little at his words.

“You know what I’m talking about, and don’t say that you need to have some secrets,” he insists with a hint of defeat.

“You don’t seem like a man to give up let alone be defeated so easily,” I bait.

“I’m not giving up . . . especially after seeing your reaction to agreeing to be Chris’ date,” he recalls.

“Please don’t remind me,” I whine. “Shit. Now the moment is ruined. Why did you have to mention him?”

“Damn. Sorry,” he quickly apologizes.

“Now you’ve got to make it up to me,” I entice to get our focus back on our playful banter.

“Anything . . . name it!” he says, practically jumping through the phone.

“Hmmm . . .” I try to think about what he could say or do right now. “Say something with your sexy voice,” I direct.

“For you, beautiful, anything,” his voice delivers perfectly, echoing through my ear and erotically teasing my whole body.

“Mmmm . . .” I return as my right hand uncontrollably dips down between my legs. I can’t will it to stop. My breathing heightens as my fingers glide up and down my mounds over my underwear. Control yourself, Emma.

Joe clears his throat before investigating, “What was that?”

“Hmmm . . . nothing,” I contend, regaining self-control. Funny thing is that I don’t sound flustered.

“That didn’t sound like nothing,” he retorts a little shaky. “Do you . . . uhhh . . . need some assistance?”

“No,” I deliver as my hand slides up and over my nipple.

“Sounds like you do,” he asserts clearing his throat again.

“Mmmm . . . no.”

I feel like I should be alarmed or embarrassed at what is happening, but I’m not. This is so weird.

“I should let you go,” I say, wanting to continue to pleasure myself without him hearing me.

What the hell am I doing?

“I think I should stay on. Make sure you’re good,” his voice cracks as he disagrees.

“I’m good . . .” I report.

“I”m not so sure,” he suggests.

“Jared and Nathan are nearby if . . .” I begin to say before he cuts me off.

“I doubt that they’ll be able to assist you properly,” he advises.

I laugh a little which gets him to laugh too.

“I should get to bed. I’ve got a long day tomorrow,” I mention.

I don’t really want to rush him off the phone, but I’m so horny and I don’t want to masturbate with him on the phone. He already suspects enough.

Joe groans his disappointment into my ear. “Is that want you want?”

“I want a lot of things, but that doesn’t mean I should,” I profess with hidden undertones.

Clearing his throat first, Joe asks, “What do you want?”

My smile widens as my hand dips down to my lips again. “Bed. I . . .” my voice trails as I bite my lip to stifle any noises from coming out as my traitorous fingers gloriously torment me. “Goodnight, Joe,” I manage to mutter.

After an outward breath into the phone, Joe returns with his sexy voice, “Goodnight, beautiful. Sweet dreams.”

“You too,” I mumble as my fingers slide below my underwear before I hit the red, end button.

I wake rested, but my mood is a little funky even after masturbating from the borderline phone sex Joe and I almost had. When I relieve myself, I realize why I’m not so chipper, that time of the month has arrived. I must not have been paying attention to my calendar. My period starting will help me adhere to my rules — at least for another few days.

I still can’t wrap my head around what’s going on with me and my blatant forwardness with Joe last night, but I must move forward and not let it distract me while I conduct business. I can’t loose focus. There are too many things that need to be taken care of that are important, including Maggie’s wedding. I may not still be one hundred percent elated about how quickly Maggie and Henry are getting married, but my feelings will not hinder me from doing my maid of honor duties or make sure that Maggie’s wedding is flawlessly joyful.

Jared and Nathan are still sleeping, but Pop-Pop is out in the living room reading a newspaper when Sadie and I exit the bedroom. We exchange pleasantries before Pop-Pop joins us on our morning walk.

Back at the condo, I fall right into the rest of my morning routine of rebounding, stretching, showering and then start preparing a hearty breakfast for my companions and myself. While I work on my computer in the living room, Nathan and Jared finish getting ready for the day as Pop-Pop putters. The four of us, plus Sadie, hop into Nathan’s Tesla and head on over to Nathaniel’s.

After Nathan double checks my measurements for the one-of-a-kind dress he’s making for the September movie premier with Chris, I hide in his back office to work on the computer, bouncing from tasks for Nathaniel’s and Naturally Me, but mostly on the software for Raven Media. I slip out of the office from time to time, needing a stretch or a drink, but I work straight through lunch. Jared brings some food, but I barely taste it because I’m so focused. I’m not even sure what I had to eat.

Jared’s been doing a great job taking on extra tasks for Naturally Me as I work with Hannah and Brandon on the coding for the first round of the Raven 1.0 software. If things go smoothly and there is an immediate demand for our new service, moving forward on the business investment deal with Joe and his father will come much quicker, leaving me with less time for Naturally Me. I’m considering on speaking with Jared about taking over, giving him a percentage of Naturally me, but I’m not sure how receptive he’ll be or if I’m willing to let go of it. I trust Jared completely there’s no challenge there. It’s just that for me, things are changing all across the board in all aspects of my life; Maggie and Henry getting married, Jared and Nathan being in a committed relationship, Pop-Pop joining the family, Naturally Me, Raven Media and Joe. Chris — he’s a temporary state that will be finalized the night of the premier.

Pop-Pop is an adorable man. During one of my breaks, I watch him without hesitation walk around checking the store and fixing little things that need to be fixed. The front door hinge squeaked each time someone came in; not anymore. When Jared and I discuss Naturally Me, Pop-Pop listens quietly and asks questions once Jared and I are finished. I think I’m going to have to talk to Jared about finding a permanent position, full or part-time, for Pop-Pop. He’s eager and happy to help so we might as well add him to the roaster based off of what he feels most comfortable doing.

With headphones in my ears streaming classical music, Jared practically scares me to death when he taps me on the shoulder. I almost scream — I am that focused.

“Come on, we’re leaving for dinner,” Jared announces.

“I have to feed Sadie. Where are we going?” I ask, checking the time — it’s almost five.

“Pop-Pop and I took care of her already knowing you were working. Joe’s parents invited us over. Didn’t I tell you?”

“No,” I contend, squinting my eyes in an as playful manner as I can.

“Sorry,” Jared sheepishly states.

“Yeah, yeah,” I tease. “You owe me.”

“Sure do,
Kitten
,” he replies, helping me pack up.

Jared, Nathan, Pop-Pop, Sadie and I pile into the car and make our way over to Joe’s penthouse. We thankfully make it in just about an hour — got to love the HOV lane. After friendly greetings in the living room with Mr. and Mrs. Covelli, Jimmy, Allen and Joe, we are ushered into the dining room by Anna.

As dinner is served, conversations are light and fun. I see a distinct difference with Mr. and Mrs. Covelli and how they speak. They are less formal and even more friendly. Mrs. Covelli and Pop-Pop swap stories about their families for most of the meal which keeps everyone easily entertained.

“So, Emma,” Mr. Covelli begins. “Which of your two businesses did you start first?”

“No business talk during dinner, John,” Mrs. Covelli reminds playfully.

“My apologies, my love. I’m just trying to get to know Emma better. I have no intention of actually talking business,” he sweetly announces.

“Your intention is never to talk about business, but your habit always ends up there, sweetheart,” she reveals teasingly.

“You are right as always, my love. My apologies,” Mr. Covelli answers sweetly, taking her hand in his and kissing the back of it.

I can easily see the love and playfulness of their relationship. It appears as if they are restraining their banter as to not draw too much attention away from their guests, but enough to show their personalities more to make us feel more comfortable. I admire them and feel more comfortable than I usually do with most people I meet.

“Emma, my dear, have you always lived in California?” Mr. Covelli proceeds.

“No,” I reply keeping things simple.

“Where else have you lived?” he continues.

“Jersey,” I offer taking a sip of wine.

Mr. Covelli chuckles, “You’re a very to the point kind of woman.”

“My apologies. Yes, sir.”

“There’s no need to apologize. I admire that,” he flatters.

“Thank you,” I graciously accept.

“I take it that you grew up in New Jersey?” he investigates further.

“Yes sir,” I answer with a softer smile.

“Where are your parents? It would have been nice to have them here tonight as well,” Mrs. Covelli politely interjects.

Not wanting to be rude, but wanting to answer her question, I inform, “They’re back in Jersey.”

“Do you get to visit them often?” Mrs. Covelli continues.

“When I can.”

“Do they come out here more to visit you then . . . since you’re so busy with your businesses?” she pushes, wanting to know more.

“Now, my love, you are starting to talk about business,” Mr. Covelli muses.

“Oh John, don’t you start,” she baits with a twinkle in her eye.

As much as I hate being the topic of discussion, I am enjoying Mr. and Mrs. Covelli. Ironically, some of their playfulness reminds me of how Joe and I are together. I can’t help but smile a little watching them.

Everyone sits quietly looking to me. Crap. Do I really have to answer?

“It’s a little hard for my parents to visit,” I reply, hoping my answer will suffice her curiosity.

“Why is that, my dear?” Mrs. Covelli presses.

Jared squeezes my right hand that is resting on my lap. I take a sip of water and clear my throat trying to avoid the awkward silence. Unfortunately, I know I need to answer.

“My parents are . . .” I begin, but fall short of saying more.

“They are no longer with us,” Jared offers on my behalf.

I see the shock on Jimmy’s and Allen’s faces first. Joe didn’t tell them?! As my gaze sweeps across the table to Mr. and Mrs. Covelli, I see Anna gently touch her heart before making the sign of the cross. Mr. and Mrs. Covelli’s reactions do not match the others who did not know. Their eyes soften as they offer a reassuring smile in consolation.

“My apologies, Emma. I’m so sorry,” Mrs. Covelli warmly states.

I nod acceptance, though I sense a hint of pity behind her words. I appreciate her kind gesture, but I hate receiving pity from people.

“That explains a lot,” Jimmy randomly blurts.

Joe punches him in the arm, hard enough that I could practically feel it on the other side of the table.

“Ouch,” Jimmy mumbles.

An uncomfortable mood permeates the room.

“Excuse me for a moment, please,” I proclaim, quickly standing up from my seat. Jared lets go of my hand and doesn’t follow, giving me the needed space he knows I require. Joe, Jimmy, Allen and Mr. Covelli all stand up when I do.

Not sure where to go and not wanting to be completely rude, I swiftly exit the dining room. Without thinking, my body takes me through the halls and I find myself in Joe’s bedroom of all places. What am I doing in here? I don’t really care. I just need a moment.

Sitting on the edge of his bed, I close my eyes and focus on my breathing. Breathe, Emma. Just Breathe. My mind starts to wander as I feel the need to be consoled. One would think that my best friend, my brother, who has loved and helped me all these years, would be the one to come to mind. Not at all. Not him. The person I want to enter the door is the man who my body desperately craves. I want Joe Covelli.

The uncontrollable urge to pee rises to the point where I can no longer hold it while waiting for Joe to find me. I hurry with the hopes of him standing in his room waiting for me. Regrettably, no one is there, not even Sadie. Where is she? She followed me into the bedroom.

I tentatively make my way back to the dining room and find everyone talking freely. Sitting back down, I smile and make eye contact with everyone as I listen in on the new topic at hand. To show my respect and that there are no hard feelings, I do add a comment or question from time to time on the various subjects.

We all continue to talk late into the evening, eventually moving from the dining room to the living room. Joe graciously plays the piano on occasion, even when smaller conversations take place. Seeing Pop-Pop yawn a few times, Jared suggests we make our way home. Jared, Nathan and Pop-Pop drive Sadie and I home since it’s already well after ten. The three of them join Sadie and me up in my apartment, giving Pop-Pop a quick tour of the place as well as use of the restroom.

After saying farewell to my family, I strip down and hop into the tub for a relaxing bath. Roughly ten minutes later — I know because of the three songs that just finished playing, my phone chirps.

“Hi,” I greet in a relaxed tone.

“Hi, beautiful,” he soothingly returns. “I’m just checking in.”

“About what?”

“Earlier, at dinner,” he admits.

“Ohh. Yeah. I’m fine. Thanks,” I offer.

“Really?” he searches.

“Yeah,” I let out on a sigh.

“Jared and them still there?” he investigates.

“No, they left a few minutes ago,” I reply.

“What are you doing?” he seeks.

“What am I usually doing this time of night when you call?”

I can feel him smile as silence falls upon our conversation as usual. Neither one of us really needing to talk at the moment; just enjoying hearing the other one breathe. By now a few thoughts of Joe joining me are entertained, but with it being that time of the month, I have trouble envisioning it fully.

“I’ll let you go,” he surprisingly states.

“Oh, okay,” I reply, trying to curb my shock.

“I just wanted to make sure you are okay,” he kindly enforces.

“Yeah,” I say, not knowing what else to utter.

“Goodnight, beautiful,” his voice sings, resonating throughout my entire body. “See you tomorrow.”

“Yes. See you tomorrow. Goodnight, Joe.”