Just Between Us (4 page)

Four
–
Just speaking

Now

“
And what exactly can Kyle do down there that I can’t do here?” My mum whined as I nursed a hangover and packed my bags.

             
“I need a change of scenery, Mum. Everything here reminds me of heartache, and my life here makes me miserable.”

             
“Oh charming,” she huffed, sitting on the edge of my bed.

             
“Look it’s not you or Mick or anything like that, it’s me, my life, and you two are better off without your crazy daughter moving home. You can go out to your hearts desire and not worry about me.”

             
“I always worry about you, whether you’re living here or not, mothers always do.” She placed her hand on mine as I packed, and I let her lay it there.

             
“It’s only for the summer. I’ll be back when school starts, and hopefully I’ll be better and refreshed, and I can bump into people who know us both without bursting into tears.”

             
“What about your friends?”

             
“Oh they’re all in couples, and I’ll be doing them a favour as well. No one wants to party like you’re single when you’re not.”

             
“Sophie,” she said in a low voice. “You can’t run away from your problems and your life, you need to face up to it, make a new life for yourself here, without … him.”

             
“You can say his name, Mum, Simon.” My eyes misted as I said it, but I turned to get more clothes. “I’m not running away. I’m taking a sabbatical that’s all.”

             
“A sabbatical from your life? Is that possible?”

             
“I think it’ll do me good.”

             
“I’m not sure Kyle’s lifestyle is what you need right now.”

             
“What … constant parties? Maid service and a pool in my building? Sounds like hell,” Kyle said, walking into the room.

             
“She needs to heal Kyle, not replace misery with alcohol.” Mum sighed.

             
“Good God, Mags what kind of life do you think I lead? I’m not Hugh Heffner! I work hard, I attend work parties to network with colleagues and clients, and I spend my days in the studio, at the gym, and in my office.”

             
“Look, I’ve decided to get out of the house which should make you happy, Mum, and I’m willing to try and enjoy a summer in London. Can you both stop going on just in case I burst into tears and fall back into my bed?” I shook my head and closed my case.

             
“Fine,” Mum said, springing up from the bed and plastering a fake smile on her face. “You two enjoy yourselves, and if you need me to, I can come and get you.”

             
“I’m twenty eight and can get the train home, but I appreciate the offer.” I rolled my eyes.

             
“Well you’ve been like my baby again this past month, it’s hard to keep up.”

             
I smiled at her. I could see how this must appear. Kyle comes home and suddenly I’m a new woman. The month after Simon dumped me I was moping, wishing the time away so I could wallow in my bed watching movies and eating rubbish. However something had changed now that Kyle was back, it wasn’t him or even me, I still felt miserable, it was just hope. He’d dangled a carrot for me to leave the house, leave the embarrassment, and I had decided to take it. I may not enjoy myself, I may cry every day, but at least I wouldn’t be in my teenage bedroom wondering where it all went terribly wrong.

             
Kyle saw the cases that I had already packed. He wore a snug T shirt and jeans, his sunglasses were on his head, pushed into his dark hair, and he smiled at me, which made me smile. He always managed to win everyone over with that God-damn smile. Maybe Kyle was exactly what I needed. He always had a knack of making you feel like the only person in the room when he wanted to, and if he could use his charm on me to make me feel better then I would let him. He picked up two cases with strong arms.

             
“I thought you said you didn’t have much stuff.”

             
“I don’t,” I shrugged, “this is nothing.”

             
“Remind me not to offer to move the rest of it out of Dick Head’s house.” It was too soon for the joke, but he wasn’t to know. The pain of my things in that house and Simon still there struck me like a lightning bolt, but I smiled through it. My eyes felt misty, but I was determined not to cry. This had to be a new Sophie who was strong and could face new people in London who had no idea about her situation.

             
I lugged the final case down the stairs and stopped to look at myself in the hallway mirror. I wore a light sundress that was covered in pink and yellow flowers. It hung off me. I was always slim, I had curves, but I wasn’t overweight, and now I looked gaunt. My bras were a little bit too big, and this dress seemed to drown me where last year it clung to me nicely. My hair that had been smooth yesterday was now tied messily on top of my head, my brown eyes looked sad, and I tried to lift them with a smile, but it didn’t work. I was sad. I still felt hung over, but that pain was manageable, and it helped to dull the pain of my broken heart, my broken life.

             
“Come on,” Kyle said, bursting through the door and letting in the sunshine. “We need to get moving. I’ll treat you to a Maccy’s burger on our way out.”

             
“Right.” I snapped out of my trance and went to find Mum. She was sitting on the patio with Mick. Mick looked up from his paper.

             
“Now take care of her, son. She’s in a delicate condition.” He stood up to shake hands with Kyle and hug him.

             
“I’m not pregnant or dying Mick, I’m not in any condition. I’m in mourning.”

             
“Right,” He looked to Mum, and she plastered a smile on her face, widening her eyes for dramatic effect.

             
“Well mourn away and try to get Simon out of your head so you can be my happy girl again.” She moved in to hug me, and then she hugged Kyle.

             
“Right we better go and beat the traffic,” Kyle said.

             
“Okay bye.” Mum hugged me again and squeezed me a little tighter.

             
“I’m always at the other end of the phone.”

             
“I know.” I nodded.

We made our way out to Kyle’s black, convertible BMW M5. There wasn’t anymore room in the boot for my bags, so I had to squeeze one between my knees.

             
“Still driving a Beemer then?” I asked.

             
“They’re the best.” He winked at me.

Old Times

Mum and I were really excited for the holiday in Mexico, she took me shopping for new clothes, and we excitedly decided what trips we would go on when we got there. We bought books that we could share for the time away. Mick had organised for us to use a yacht that belonged to a friend of his for the day, and so we imagined how beautiful it would be out in the ocean, and that we would snorkel off the side.

             
We started packing a week before we were due to leave, and Mick indulged us by counting down the days. Kyle was out a lot. He only had one exam left for when we got home and that was General Studies so he was no longer revising. Instead, he and his best friend, David Tripp, were cruising all over in Kyle’s car looking for parties and trouble. Mum wasn’t a fan of David and neither was I. Whenever he was in the house he always made a point of talking to me and trying to embarrass me, and Kyle would roll his eyes.

             
“Leave the step alone,” he’d sigh, “come on Dave, let’s get out of here.”

             
Kyle didn’t hide his disdain for me or our house. He acted as if he couldn’t wait to leave whereas for me it was my haven. Mick was a wonderful step-dad to me, and I wondered what Kyle found so insufferable about him.  

             
We left for Mexico on a cold April day. We were all chatting excitedly in the taxi at four am, whereas Kyle sat brooding.

             
“Leaving a girl behind?” Mick chuckled jokingly. “You need to cheer up; we’re off to paradise.”

             
“Hardly.” Kyle sniffed and continued to stare out of the window.

             
The ten-hour flight was manageable, there were plenty of films to watch, food to eat, and Mum and I got started on some of our books. I sat by the window. Mum was next to me, and Kyle sat in the row behind with Mick. Halfway through the flight I offered to swap so Mum and Mick could sit together and Mum asked was I sure, I nodded in agreement, and so we moved.

             
Kyle turned away from me and fell asleep, so I got engrossed in a romantic comedy that I hadn’t seen before. When he woke we were almost there, so I smiled to him.

             
“Nearly there.”

             
He looked at me and noticed how close he had moved to me during his sleep. “If you wanted a cuddle you only had to ask,” he spat. I turned bright red and looked away from him. He really was an absolute idiot and this holiday was going to be ruined by his behaviour.

             
We arrived at our amazing, five-star, all-inclusive resort. We were led from a huge marble entrance lobby to our rooms, on the same floor, but all separate. Mum and Mick first and Kyle and me on the end. I had a huge king-sized bed, mini fridge, and large en-suite bathroom to myself. The floors were an expanse of cream tiles and the walls decorated indulgently in cream and white swirls. It was beautiful and decadent and I was awestruck. At dinner-time we decided to eat and then stay up as long as we could so that the jet lag didn’t catch up with us straight away. We had agreed to meet in half an hour, and so I got a coke from the fridge and went out to the balcony with my book. Kyle’s balcony was next to mine, and he sat there, too.

             
I didn’t say anything to him as it was never worth it. He also remained silent, and so we both sat on our balconies not saying a word.

             
The days passed and Kyle made friends with some of the hospitality staff. Mum, Mick, and I stayed around the pool, but Kyle often did his own thing except at meal times when we all sat together. After a couple of days, Kyle waited until Mum and Mick had gone for a cool down in the pool, and then approached me.

             
“Soph,” I heard him murmur, but couldn’t believe he would be talking to me, so I continued to read my book. “Soph,” he whispered again more loudly.

             
“What?” I hissed in a harsh whisper, he was probably going to ask me to get him a drink or something ridiculous.

             
“Meet me at the bar. I need to ask you something.” He smiled at me with that mega-watt grin. I had seen it before, directed at my Mum if he needed something or at school when conversing with friends, but never to his father or me.

             
“What?” I groaned, a little louder. “You can’t just say it here?” I pulled my sunglasses up that I had been wearing over my eyes to make eye contact, so he would see I was serious. He ignored me, stood up in just his swimming shorts, and made his way into the bar. I glanced to our parents who were canoodling in the pool, grabbed my sarong, and positioned it over my bikini so that I wasn’t revealing anything and made my way to the bar. By the time I reached the bar I saw Kyle in the corner, away from anyone else, brooding with two beers. He didn’t look up as I approached, and he looked amazing, all tan and taut in just his shorts, the gloominess was his only downside from where I was looking.

             
I took a seat, and he slid one of the beers over to me. I took a sip.

             
“So?” I asked, perhaps harsher than I meant to sound, but we weren’t friends, and this was weird.

             
“So,” he sighed, “I sort of want you to do something with me.”

             
“What?” I asked, taken aback. We rarely spoke and so this was unusual. Panic rose in my stomach as my mind conjured up what it could be.

             
“I want you to sneak out with me.”

             
“What?” I spat, “what the fuck, Kyle? Are you on drugs? Sneak where and do what?”

             
He smiled to himself. “God, Soph, you’re safe with me, Jesus. I just want you to sneak out tonight and come with me on the hotel shuttle to Coco Bongo.”

             
“What?” I laughed, his request suddenly sounded so pathetic. Coco Bongo was the local club, we were eighteen, and perfectly able to go clubbing. It wasn’t as if we were twelve, and he certainly didn’t need me to party. I took a sip of my beer. “Kyle you don’t need me to go out clubbing with you, you’ve made enough friends of these reps, and I bet our parents would be fine with you going. You are eighteen and so don’t need to sneak anywhere.”