Juilliard or Else (46 page)

"I see. What about your condition? Have you given it any thought?"

I met her yes, "Yes, I'm gonna have the baby and keep it." That's what I wanted. I didn't want to give this up.

"I see," Carol waved her fingers in the air, signaling something behind me. I turned to see not something, but someone.

Alex made his way towards us, dressed in a gray pressed suit, his hair done nicely, and very gorgeous looking as usual. I faced back to Carol, "You called him? He's the last person I expected to see here."

She held up a hand, "Now listen to what he has to say, alright?"

I rolled my eyes as Alex pulled out the chair next to Carol's then sat down, his blue eyes piercing at me with the same look he always gave me. It didn't make my stomach twist and turn as if Tucker was looking at me. I hadn't see Alex since he was in the room with Tucker, yelling at me to get out. I couldn't even look at him. If you push past his good looks, Alex made me feel uncomfortable. And I was just going to find out how uncomfortable he made me with him being here.

"Nice to see you again, Abigail."

I smiled up at him, but I didn't have anything to say to him. He ordered his drink while more silence filled out little table. The waiter brought his drink, then Carol started talking.

"Abigail, Alex here has something he wants to say to you." She turned to him and my eyes met his.

"I know about your pregnancy. I want to help you keep your reputation up. I want you to marry me."

I huffed, "You call that a proposal? You certainly know how to sweep a girl right off her feet."

Alex then unbuttoned his jacket and reached inside in his coat pocket. When his hand came out, he held a little blue box that was every girls dream, setting it down on the table and pushed it towards me with his long fingers.

I sat back in my chair as if the box would burn me if it came near me. That's it! My conscience screamed at me.

Tucker knew he was lying to me. He knew I could handle it, as I thought about all the times things didn't make any sense while talking to him. He was trying to keep it from me. Protect me from him.

I glimpsed back up to Alex, his eyes were down, staring at the unopened box. I glanced over to Carol who was glaring at me.

"What?" I asked her.

"Don't be rude. Open the box." She jerked her head to the little blue Tiffany's box.

I couldn't open it. I didn't want to touch it. I couldn't, that would betray my heart of my true feelings. I couldn't do that to any man.

"Abigail," Alex got up from his chair, grabbing the ring box, and then dropping down to one knee. My nerves started up.

"Abigail, I know we don't know each other. I want to get to know you. Help you in any way I can. We can work together as a team. I will take care of you and your child, if you would just give me a chance. Marry me."

He opened the box. Nestled inside was a gorgeous, huge ring. The center diamond was at least four carats with little diamonds surrounding it. Alex's eyes were piercing blue as he asked me to marry him. But he did it wron—he said the wrong things.

Carol put her elbows on the table, leaning closer to me. "Isn't it beautiful Abigail?

I stuttered, "It's overwhelming, but no Alex. Again, I don't love you and you don't love me. We…"

"Abigail, enough! You are being so disrespectful towards Alex and our family name. You deny him only because he isn't the father of your child. That boy cannot take care of you, he doesn't belong in our world, he can't do anything right. He'll only drag you down."

Carol's words stabbed my heart, deadly as sin. I wanted to swat them away like a dead fly. Even if it wasn't Tucker's baby, I still couldn't just marry someone else just because my reputation was on the line. This isn't the 1800's where that was the only option in life. There are tons of single teen moms in this world and I was gonna join them. I don't need Alex to take care of me.

"Think about it Abigail. I can take care of you." Alex said shutting the box and placing it on my leg. He stood up and left. I glanced at Carol who had a little smile on her face.

I walked home in a huge pregnancy emotional mess. Today had been so stressful. Pouring my soul out to a doctor I've only known for 24hours, Carol showing up in the waiting room; I actually thought maybe she cared enough as to why I was there in the first place…drinks afterward, and then Alex's weird proposal. The ring box was a brick in my purse, just sitting there, burning away at the seams. Carol didn't say anything to me after Alex left our table—I left first. I needed Jade; I needed to talk with her.

I decided not to call Tucker back. Three weeks was a long time to lie low from someone; I figured he could wait. I didn't want to crawl back to him after the first call he makes to me. I walked into my very quiet apartment and called out for Jade. Tossing my purse into my door my room as I heard some mumbled voices, sounding like she was on the phone when I walked into her bedroom. She sat on her bed wide eyed at me as I stomped my way in and starting shouting.

"Alex freaking proposed. He proposed!" Jade's brows shot up. "I can't believe it." I paced back and forth in front of her bed. "And what's worse, he gave me this huge blinging, blanging ring too! Not just some dinky little thing, but this huge diamond ring."

"Um.. Gabs, stop." Jade held her arms up.

"He got down on one knee and everything, right in front of Carol." My arms were all over the place as I continued to shout. I don't know if I was mad, angry, or frustrated, maybe all the above.

"And did I tell you the ring is huge, it's huge! I just stared at it, but Carol told me not to be rude, so I had to take it. You know how Carol is. I can't stand when she does crap like this. Said he wanted to take care of me, his baby or not. He doesn't care!"

"Gabs stop."

But I didn't listen to her. I kept going, rambling on and on about what happened just recently. Jade kept telling me to stop, I don't know why. She would hold her hands up and wave them. I'm sure she just wanted to throw in her opinion. Jade didn't like Alex, she was Team Tucker all the way. I don't blame her. With Tucker always gone, me being alone and pregnant, the more I wanted someone to lean on. Was that just the girl in me or was it all in the pregnancy? This was going to drive me insane.

"Gabs!"

I faced Jade, "What?!"

"Will you stop and listen to me for one damn minute please?" Climbing off her bed and taking my hand to pull me into my room. I couldn't believe my eyes as I saw Jett and Tucker sitting on my bed. Tucker holding the blue Tiffany box that held the ring Alex just proposed to me with. Seriously, could this situation get any worse?

Jade leaned into me. "He came over to talk with you."

The box snapped shut and Tucker chucked it into the shared bathroom, stalking towards me. His blue eyes were so angry looking, not soft and subtle at all. He reached up and I flinched back, his eyes went soft a mere second that I recoiled back. Then he grabbed my snowflake necklace and ripped it off my neck and stalked off around me. I started to go after him but Jett ran past me and they were gone and out the door. I dropped to my knees and cried once again into my hands. Jade hurdled over me, only trying to bring me some comfort, but it was nothing to compared to Tucker's strong arms.

I tried calling Tucker, no answer. I tried texting him, no answer. He did pick up the phone once; I could tell because I heard the tattoo machine, but he hung up on me. I get that he's pissed, but I'm pissed too that he wouldn't let me explain. I had my nights where I had to have Jade in my bed just so I would stop crying. I tried everything I could to talk Jade into calling Tucker so he would answer and then I would get on the phone. She told me no and then said he would just hang up on me. I stopped trying a week after he left my apartment.

I went to Juilliard a week later with one mission on my mind—facing Madame Ava. I had my usual bag of Andes chocolates in my hand; they were the only thing that I didn't get sick from and they had some sugar so I didn't get too sick. The day was gorgeous as the sun shined on my face and the snow was melting as I walked to Juilliard and up the front steps. It was a Saturday so no one was here, but Madame Ava lived in her class so I knew she would be here. I slowly walked down the empty hallway as I chewed chocolate after chocolate. Madame Ava's door was open with beautiful classic music playing in the background. I stopped to study her move across the room up on her toes, turning softly and slowly. She had her eyes closed as she danced and closed up her imaginary scene in her head. She was a very beautiful dancer, I'm so happy I got to see this part of her before I through in the towel.

"Abigail, what are you doing here?" She asked breathlessly with her hands on her hips.

"I wanted to come talk with you," I eased my way into the ballet room and sat on the bench were our ballet bags would go.

Madame Ava came to sit with me. "What about?" She took a gulp of her water and patted her face with a towel.

Might as well just spit it out.

"I'm pregnant." I hung my head in shame. I quickly unwrapped another Andes chocolate and stuffed it in my mouth.

"Don't eat so much chocolate." Madame Ava told me as she took the bag out of my hands. "You'll end up with high sugar in your urine and you'll have to do a 24 hour urine collection. Trust me, I know."

I giggled. I really didn't need to know that much.

"I'm sorry to hear this Abigail, I had high hopes for you."

"I'm sorry." I looked at her, her eyes were shimmered over. She looked beautiful.

"Don't be. You'll be an amazing mom. Young, but amazing." Then she pulled me into her side to give me a hug. She was right, I was young. I wish Tucker and I could have been more careful. But this wasn't a problem; I can solve this on my own.

Today was my first doctor's appointment. I had found a doctor online that was very close to our apartment building. I had called Tucker before I left the apartment, but of course he didn't answer the phone. I left a message and gave the address of the doctor's office. I had to try and move on without him. I felt so naked without my necklace around my neck. My hand would always go up, but nothing would be there.

Jade sighed again next to me. "I hate doctor's offices," her knee bouncing wildly, up and down.

I quietly laughed, "Why?"

"They smell," she answered as she flipped through a magazine. I walked to the wall that was full of pamphlets about birth, circumcision, and cord blood. I picked up each one to look through at home. It's too soon to find out the sex of the baby. I'm only around ten weeks or so.. not sure on the exact date of when I actually conceived the baby.

"Abigail McCall?" A nurse called out.

I was weighed, which was one hundred and six pounds. While the nurse was writing my weight down, there was a board in front of me with tons of baby announcements. And some even the doctors were holding the little babies. The nurse took us down into a little room where she took my blood pressure, made more notes. She clicked on the computer and asked me questions if I was sick with morning sickness, how would I rate the sickness on a level from one to ten (I said five) and if anything was bothering me so far in the pregnancy. I shook my head. Made more notes and then she left us.

"Damn, stupid doctors taking their stupid time." Jade kept mumbling out while flipping through more magazines. She was always so impatient with everything. She was the same way while we waited in Dr. Walters' office. I checked my phone, hoping there would be a text from Tucker that magically appeared and I missed the chime. Nothing came. I debated about texting him again, maybe he didn't get it.