Jitterbug Perfume (55 page)

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Authors: Tom Robbins

Tags: #Satire

BOOK: Jitterbug Perfume
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Beets consumed at dinner will, come morning, stock a toilet bowl with crimson fish, their hue attesting to beet's chromatic immunity to the powerful digestive acids and thoroughgoing microbes that can turn the reddest pimento, the orangest carrot, the yellowest squash into a single disgusting shade of brown.

At birth we are red-faced, round, intense, pure. The crimson fire of universal consciousness burns in us. Gradually, however, we are devoured by parents, gulped by schools, chewed up by peers, swallowed by social institutions, wolfed by bad habits, and gnawed by age; and by the time we have been digested, cow style, in those six stomachs, we emerge a single disgusting shade of brown.

The lesson of the beet," then, is this: hold on to your divine blush, your innate rosy magic, or end up brown. Once you're brown, you'll find that you're blue. As blue as indigo. And you know what that means:

Indigo.

Indigoing.

Indigone.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

A former student of art and religion, TOM ROBBINS spent five years as an urban newspaperman before vanishing into the country to write fiction. Born in North Carolina and reared in Virginia, Mr. Robbins lives in northwestern Washington State.

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