Jade Crew: Forgotten Bear (A BBW Paranormal Shape Shifter Romance) (Ridgeback Bears Book 3) (11 page)

***

Gwen yawned, her eyes blinking open as early morning sunshine flickered in through the open window shades.

A smile played across her face as she remembered the night before. They had gone to bed some time later, having determined that the shower was in fact
not
big enough, and after having to clean up the water all over the place that had resulted.

Her smile became a lip-biting grin as the rest of her body checked in for morning awareness. Along with it came the realization that Russell was lying on his side behind her. Which meant that his currently rock-hard cock was pressed firmly against her naked ass under nothing but a single layer of sheets.

She wondered if they had time before he had to go to work.

His alarm hasn’t gone off yet, so you have
some
time at least.

It would have to do, she told herself. Very, very slowly, she rocked her hips, pushing her ass back into him with the most microscopic of movements. There was no reaction from him, but she enjoyed having his dick rubbing up against her. Feeling emboldened, she ground against him harder, though not hard enough that she risked him falling onto his back.

Although that might present other opportunities…

After a minute or two of continuous movement, he finally stirred. Wetness was pooling between her thighs as she continued to move against him, aching to simply have him slide inside of her.

She wondered how much more it would take before he was awake. Bracing herself with her hands, she pushed her ass back against his cock once more.

“Oh!” she said with a gasp as he moved.

One arm swooped over her top leg and pulled it up, while his hips pulled back violently to allow his cock to slide free of its place between her cheeks and position itself firmly against her now-ready opening. Then, without waiting for approval, he pushed inside of her.

She was slightly sore from the night before she realized, but the pain was quickly pushed aside by the amazing feeling of being filled up by his cock.

“This
is
what you were going for, right?” he teased, pausing while only halfway inside of her.

“Russell Warne, if you don’t give me the rest of that big cock of yours right now, you’re going to regret it.”

Russell, she noted as her eyes flew open wide and she cried out, was never one to disobey orders.

***

“You’re insatiable,” she mock-admonished him later as they got ready to get breakfast before he went to work.

“Have you seen yourself in a mirror recently?” he asked, completely serious. “You have the body of a goddess. It’s not my fault I’m always hard. You’re going to have to learn to deal with it.”

Gwen felt her cheeks burn at the unabashed compliment.

“I’m serious,” he said in a more focused voice. “You are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on, Gwen Revere. I can’t begin to tell you how much I hope that I get to see all of you again. Soon.”

Flames were erupting from her face, she was sure of it. He was completely unrepentant about his desires, and she loved it. Gwen had never been quite so outspoken when she wasn’t right in the middle of being intimate, but she could get used to Russell’s openness about his love of her body and what he wanted to do with it.

“Well, as long as I get to experience
all
of you again, then we have a deal,” she said, trying to mimic his attitude.

She was rewarded with a delighted smile and a flash of anticipation in his eyes.

“Deal,” he said, nodding aggressively.

“Good,” she said, ushering him out the door with a slap on the ass. “Your butt looks good in those jeans,” she told him.

“Flattery will get you everything,” he said with a grin, leaning in to plant a kiss on her lips before she could respond.

The elevator was already at their floor, so they quickly descended back to the ground floor and strode out of the lobby.

The sun was out, but there was a wind, and it bit into her cheeks with a different type of burn. A much less pleasant one, she decided.

“Is Garrett going to give you any shit for just showing up at work?” she asked, closing the car door behind her.

Russell stiffened. He always seemed to do that whenever Garrett was around, or his name was mentioned.

“No, it’ll be fine,” he said.

“What did Garrett do to you?” she asked, resting a hand on top of his to stop him when Russell went to shift the truck into reverse.

“What do you mean?” His eyes, piercing orbs of hazel brown, focused on her sharply.

“Whenever he’s around you or when his name is brought up, you get stiff and different. You clam up and become someone other than the Russell I saw last night and earlier this morning. What did he do to get that sort of reaction from you?” she asked in a gentle but unrelenting tone. Gwen wanted him to know that he needed to tell her if they were going to keep going on. This was something that had to come out into the open.

She hoped he understood that she wasn’t doing it just for the sake of prying into his life, but that she had rather more serious reasons. If she was going to become involved with him to the point where he eventually told everyone about her, then Gwen needed to know what she was stepping into. If there was something going on between Garrett and Russell, or if Garrett had done something in the past—or was still doing it—then she needed to be aware of that before she made her decision.

His hands gripped and flexed around the steering wheel so tightly that Gwen thought he might accidentally rip it off, forgetting his own strength for a moment. It seemed a viable possibility as his knuckles continued to whiten. But just as the wheel shuddered in his grip once more, he let out a massive sigh and sat back into the seat.

“You aren’t letting me go without answering this, are you?” he said at last.

“I need to know,” she told him. “For my own safety, I need to know what I’m getting into.”

“It’s not quite so simple to explain,” he said, frowning.

“Well then tell me over breakfast, while we have time?” she suggested.

Russell shook his head. “No,” he said forcefully. “I don’t want to chance anyone overhearing us.”

Gwen leaned back into her seat, looking at him with alarm. “What does that mean? You’re scaring me a little here Russell.”

“It’s not that,” he said with a wave of his hand that she was sure he had meant to be reassuring, but was most definitely
not
. “It’s just that I haven’t told anyone else because of what it could mean, and what it already
does
mean.”

“Okay,” she said, not meaning the word at all. “Now I’m really confused.”

“You have to swear to me, on whatever you hold sacred, that you will not utter a single
word
of this. Especially not to Emma or Trestin. You’re going to want to. If I see a single ounce of anything but your word when you swear to me, then you’ll be exiting this car,” he said gravely, his voice unnaturally serious.

“What have you done?’ she asked, shocked at his sudden change in mood.

“Nothing, besides not tell anyone. Now do you swear to keep your mouth shut and not breathe a word of what I’m about to say to anyone, even your girlfriends who you ‘know’ won’t tell anyone?” There was some biting sarcasm in his voice, but she knew what he meant, and didn’t take offense to it.

“I swear on the graves of my recently deceased parents,” she replied solemnly. It may not have been appropriate, but whatever it was, it clearly meant a great deal to Russell, and she intended to respect that.

His full stare bore into her while his eyes searched hers for any hint that she wasn’t serious. One sharp nod seemed to indicate he was satisfied.

“How much do you know about Garrett?” he asked, changing the subject slightly.

“Not much,” she admitted. “He and Emma are together. He’s the Alpha of your crew. That’s about it, really.”

“Have you heard about his memory?”

Gwen shook her head. “No, what about it?”

“He doesn’t have much of one,” Russell explained, telling her all about how Garrett had woken up close to Genesis Valley, remembering nothing more than his name, and that he was a bear shifter. After accepting Emma as his mate, he had remembered several fleeting memories of his extremely early life, but nothing after about age five or six, she found out, and not enough to tell him anything more about who he was.

“All right, but what does that have to do with you?” she asked as the tale wound down.

“Do you remember when you asked if I had any family?”

She nodded.

“What did I tell you?” he prompted.

“That you had a brother,” she replied. “But he’s not here.”

“What did I tell you about why he wasn’t here?”

“That he was coming, and you’ve been waiting for him to come.”

“And why am I waiting?” he prodded.

“Because he—”

She cut herself off violently as things began to click in her brain.

Russell

“Holy fucking hell Russell. Are you telling me that your brother is
Garrett
?!” Gwen yelped into the silence.

Russell nodded once, feeling the pain of everything all over again.

“Fuck. Russell. That’s…” she trailed off, at a loss for words.

“Your brother didn’t
forget
, he literally
cannot
remember who you are?” she asked after a moment.

He looked up as he nodded, seeing the tears brimming in her eyes.

“Oh Gwen, please don’t cry!” he said, leaning toward her, using his thumb to brush the unfallen ones away.

Besides, I’ve already done all the crying
, he thought silently. He didn’t want to see her upset for him. That wasn’t the way he had wanted it to go. Russell had already done all his mourning over the loss of his brother, for the time being at least.

“Russell,” she said sternly through the tears, though she tried valiantly to blink them back, a few snuck through anyway. “You
have
to tell him. You have to tell Garrett who he really is.”

“I can’t.”

“Why not?” she asked incredulously.

“For the same reason that I can’t come into the open with you right now. It would push Evan over the edge into doing something bad, something that he shouldn’t.”

Anger flared within Gwen’s eyes as he told her his reasons.

“Those are your only reasons?” she asked.

Russell nodded slowly, unsure. There had been a dangerous undertone to her voice, though he wasn’t sure why. Something told him, however, he was about to find out.

“Listen to me very carefully,” she said, sitting up straight. The tears were gone, and left behind was the strong core of the woman he was falling in love with.
Coincidentally
, he thought,
she’s also the woman who looks suspiciously like she’s about to tear me a new one.

“There is an astronomical difference between not siding with your Alpha openly by being seen with the best friend of his mate—which, by the way, I’m not happy about but I respect you enough to go with it for a short while.
But
,” her voice turned to ice. “You can’t withhold this from Garrett any longer.”

He opened his mouth to protest, but she jerked her head, and it died in his throat.

“Your reasons may be well and proper. But they don’t matter. You do not have the
right
to keep this a secret. That man, from what Emma has told me, is loving, caring, passionate and iron-willed. He also has no idea who he is, and is likely holding on for dear life to his sanity. You don’t keep something like this a secret to help him. All you’re doing is continuing to hurt him.”

Her expression changed, becoming softer, and filled with a sense of caring. “And you’re hurting yourself,” she added, reaching out with one hand to place it tenderly on top of his. “The both of you deserve this to be out in the open. I won’t pressure you anymore, but if you’re the man I know you to be, you know what has to be done.”

She was right.

His shoulders sagged. “I’ve never had someone put it like that before,” he said slowly.

“Well, you’ve never told anyone either, so that will make it more difficult,” she said with a wry grin, giving his hand a squeeze.

“I’m going to fix this. I’m not sure how yet, but I’m going to do it,” he said with resolve.

“Good,” she replied with a small smile. “Now, on another note, take me to breakfast! We can talk about this more with a full stomach.”

***

Gwen’s words echoed in his head all day.

They warred with his own memories, the most powerful of them being the day the Ridgebacks had been formed.

Russell had been waiting in a cell at the Kedyns’ mansion, left to plumb the depths of his soul while others ruled in verdict on his fate. His legs had gone numb when he realized they weren’t going to end him. That he was, in fact, going to be offered another chance at life, a chance to make it right.

“Let’s go,” Gabriel had commanded as he opened the cell door. The giant shifter towered over Russell.

“Where?” he had asked, rising slowly from the stone slab that served as a bed, and shuffling his way to the door. He was still dressed in the rags that were all that remained of his clothes, the same thing he had been wearing when they had picked him up the week before.

Gabriel hadn’t responded. He simply stood to the side of the door and waited for Russell to walk through. The guard wasn’t armed, but his body language screamed “threat” to all of Russell’s senses, and he knew better than to even consider trying to overwhelm him.

He had just been spared. Trying to escape now would be the quickest route to being ended that he could think of.

Russell was escorted up a set out stairs and then out onto a flat yard. There were others. He saw Cole and even Evan, his Alpha—former Alpha, he wondered? He didn’t have to wonder where the rest were. Each member of the crews had been paraded out and forced to watch as each trial concluded. In total, seven bears had been ended over the course of the seven days he had been held captive. Each time, the remaining shifters had been dragged from their cells and lined up like this, to listen to guilty verdicts and to watch. To know what their fate was.

Now he saw the two remaining crew members from the Amethyst crew. The crew that had tried to stand up to his own, Onyx, when Evan had made a play for the girl. Anger flared within him for a moment before dying just as quickly.

It wasn’t their fault, and they had been through the same ordeal. At this point in time, he no longer cared. It didn’t matter.

“Why are they here?” he asked as Gabriel pointed silently toward Evan and Cole.

“Same reason you are,” came the cryptic reply. Gabriel made sure he was standing next to the other two before turning and joining his fellows. Russell recognized Raphael, but he wasn’t sure who the remaining Stone Bear was. It was a new face to him.

That’s when he noticed the sixth shifter standing on his own, but clearly part of the “condemned,” and not the crowd. Russell didn’t recognize him. He wasn’t a member of the Onyx or Amethyst crews.

Why was he here? Who was he?

The questions died within him as the double doors to the building opened and Valen Kedyn emerged from within. Russell’s stomach sank. Valen was the more recluse of the two gryphon brothers who owned and operated Lionshead Mining Consortium. If he was making his presence known, the outcome could not be good.

Ice formed within him as Valen’s twin brother Marcus followed him outside.

Definitely not good.

The two of them strode toward the assembled group. They were tall, though not as broad in the shoulder or thick of muscle as bear shifters. Their long, slightly hooked noses gave them the same predatory look as their animals, a sight most unnerving to someone like Russell, who knew he was at their mercy.

Marcus had a long scar on the right hand side of his face. Rumor was that it was courtesy of him trying to tangle with a full-blown dragon shifter. Scarring a shifter was nearly impossible to do, but Russell thought if anyone knew how it was a dragon shifter. The rumors had never been confirmed, but they made altogether too much sense.

Which is also why despite the apparent size difference, none of the bears—not even Gabriel—would even contemplate trying to fight either of them. Anyone that could take on a dragon shifter and emerge alive was someone to respect.

Marcus frowned as he looked over the six bears standing in front of him. The look made his scar more vivid and imposing. Valen came to a stop at his side, face stern and made of steel, unmoving.

“This would have been much easier if you could have just gotten along,” Marcus sighed. “But you didn’t. We have finished the trials. All of the condemned have been ended, as has been witnessed. Thus, we are left with you. Remnants, remainders, and all around dregs of our society.”

Valen spoke for the first time, his smooth tenor managing to easily cut through the sounds of the mountains around them. “We believe in doing what is necessary to protect both the humans of the Valley and our operations here. We will not hesitate to end anyone who threatens that. But neither do we enjoy being wasteful.”

The notoriously reticent shifter licked his lips, as if speaking so many words aloud was distasteful. He then glanced over at Marcus, who took the cue and finished speaking.

“Thus, we are forming you into a new crew. The Ridgebacks. If you wish to live, you will all get along, and listen to your Alpha.”

“Who is that?” Russell heard Evan say. The expectation that they meant him was evident in his tone and the sudden change in his body language.

Valen’s eyes flashed as they focused on Evan, who wilted visibly under the steely gaze, his confidence broken without a single word being spoken.

The doors to inside opened again, letting out another bear. He was tall, taller than Russell or Evan. His long strides carried him clear across the level ground quickly but without haste.

Russell didn’t bother to look over. He was instead focused on the gryphon brothers. He was wondering what the hell they thought was going to happen by combining all these people into one crew. It was a recipe for disaster, he knew.

“This is your new Alpha,” Valen said, speaking again. “His name is Garrett Hoffman, and if you disobey him, that will be the end. He will not be coming to us. He will have full control over ending any of you that require it. He is also aware of your recent history with each other, and will tolerate no stupidity on your part. Is that understood?”

Russell didn’t hear any of the replies. He was too focused on staring at his new Alpha.

“Garrett?” he heard himself speak, shocked.

The crowd was already beginning to disperse, the formalities over with. It was Garrett’s crew now.

“Yes?” came the reply as Garrett stepped closer, his eyes focusing on Russell.

Russell frowned. There was no recognition in them. None at all.

“Do you know who I am?” he asked slowly.

“Part of my crew. I know names, but I don’t have a face to put to those yet. What’s your name?”

“You don’t remember me?” he asked instead in disbelief.

“I woke up just outside of Genesis Valley two weeks ago with no memory.” Garrett looked over the others. “Have any of us met before?”

Russell almost responded with the truth. That they were stepbrothers, and that they had been each other’s best friend for the past twenty years. He wanted to tell him about every crazy thing the two of them had ever done together.

But he couldn’t. Garrett clearly did not remember Russell. Hell, he thought, he may not even remember himself. He looked around at the new members of the Ridgeback crew. This was Garrett’s responsibility now. He was going to be hard-pressed to be able to keep them together as it was. If Russell were to suddenly spring this on him, it could distract him at a critical moment. It could put Garrett in danger, and Russell couldn’t do that, no matter how much his heart broke to realize the only family he had left had no idea he existed.

“No,” he replied dully. “Not really. We had a drink together three weeks ago. I didn’t get anything more out of you than your name, sorry. I was just shocked to see you,” he finished lamely.

Garrett looked at him for a moment, then nodded.

The pickaxe slipped out of Russell’s hands as he tried hard to ignore the pain that surged back to the surface as the memory hit him with full force. A snarl brewed on his lips that grew to full-blown roar as the handle of the tool bounced and landed heavily on his foot.

“What the fuck man?” Corey said, looking over at him as he paused in his work.

Russell glared at him, silently telling him that now was
not
a good time. Corey, for once, seemed to take the hint. He looked back at Russell for several seconds before blinking slowly and turning back to his wall.

Closing his eyes against the pain that still resided within him, Russell grabbed the refuse cart and powered it up. Slowly the cart, only three-quarters full, began to move, guided down the tracks that lay across the center of the tunnel, headed back toward the surface. As he approached the main spine of the tunnel forty or so feet away, he reached out and angrily smashed his fist into the big, illuminated red button.

Ahead of him the track clicked and the switch engaged, so that he could roll smoothly out onto the main line. The lights embedded into the ceiling told him nobody else was making a trip, so he closed his eyes and let the motorized machine do the work as he struggled to keep his composure.

The week after the Kedyns had joined the two crews, as the Ridgebacks got organized and began to set up shop at the Lodge, were some of the hardest days of Russell’s life.

Not only were they using the old Onyx mineshaft, preventing them from having to start fresh, but each day was spent in close proximity to his brother. The brother who didn’t remember anything about him. Their parents had gotten married when Russell was seven, and Garrett was nine. For the next twenty-plus years, the two of them had been practically inseparable, until Russell had been forced to make his way to Genesis Valley after becoming involved in one too many fights with local shifters as he moved around.

He had been so excited for Garrett to come join him. The two made an amazing team. A team that no longer existed. Each night, Russell attempted to drink himself into a stupor. Once he had even dabbled with
chameleon,
the nickname for the superdrug that directly affected a shifter’s system.

It had been a low time, especially as he and Evan had begun to distance themselves from “Garrett’s Ridgebacks.” Russell disliked what Evan was doing, but loyalty to his old Alpha died hard. He would never support an open conflict with Garrett, or anything that might see him hurt, but he needed to ensure that Evan had someone to take care of him to prevent him from doing anything stupid.

Russell had done his mourning, shed his tears privately and tried to move on.

“Idiot,” he cursed, frustrated with himself. How could he have thought that pretending that Garrett was nobody to him was a good idea? In hindsight, it was the stupidest thing he had ever done.

The cart dinged and slowed as it approached the end of the line. Russell opened his eyes, automatically looking for the crane he would attach to the cart and use to dump it into the waiting dump truck. Someone came by every few days from the LMC to empty it.

“Russell, just the person I wanted to see.” Evan’s voice came from behind him.

The Ridgeback second was emerging from the trailer that served as their on-site office and lunchroom, trotting briskly across the open ground toward Russell.

“What do you want Evan?” He was not in the mood to put up with any of the other shifter’s usual antics.

“I have a proposition for you,” Evan said, his tone searching, hinting at a less-than-noble intent.

“Now is really not the best time for that,” he replied, trying to get rid of him quickly so that he could be in peace and think about everything.

“Now is the
only
time for it. In fact, time may be running out,” Evan said. Russell noticed how he looked behind him toward the mine shaft. It was like he expected Garrett to come charging out at any moment. The change in his normal uncaring behavior got through the fog that had settled over Russell’s brain.

Evan was involved in something serious.

“What have you done?” he asked suspiciously.

“Nothing. Why? What have you heard?” Evan fixed him with a stare, trying to pry the words out of Russell without saying anything more.

Russell shrugged, the glare sliding off of him easily. He had been glared at by some of the best out there. Evan’s stare had nothing on the likes of Ajax or Valen Kedyn.

“Do you want in then?” Evan asked after a moment of silence.

“Not without knowing what you’re up to,” he told his former Alpha. Russell held back a sigh of disappointment. He wished fervently that Evan would admit that he wasn’t going to be an Alpha again and settle in with the Ridgebacks. They were a damn good crew, and they would be far more effective with Evan working with them instead of against them.

“I can’t tell you yet. Not without knowing. So, in or out Russ? What’s it going to be? This could be the opportunity we’ve been looking for all along.”

“The opportunity for what?”

“To get rid of Garrett for good!” Evan crowed, before glancing over his shoulder again.

“Do you ever think that maybe Garrett isn’t doing that horrible of a job?” Russell said, asking a question instead of giving a reply.

“It’s not about that,” Evan snarled. “It’s about me getting what’s rightfully mine. What they
owe
me.”