Italian Folktales (67 page)

At that point, the youngest son, who had been listening, spoke up; “We've gone this far, so we might as well go the rest of the way. Papa, I want to try too. Let's sell the piglet, replace the tools, and who knows but what I might succeed where they failed.”

In short, the piglet was sold and the youngest son went off to the woods with the tools. He was already halfway through building the boat, when the same old man showed up. “My lad, what are you doing?”

“I'm building a boat to glide over land and water.”

“You shall find a boat all built and ready to glide over land and water,” said the old man and left him.

That night the boy went home, dined, slept, and at dawn returned to the woods. There stood the boat finished down to the smallest detail, with the sails unfurled. He went aboard and commanded, “Boat, glide over land,” and the boat moved through the woods as smoothly as if it had been on water and came out before his house; his father and brothers were too amazed for words.

Then the boy repeated his command, “Boat, glide over land,” and headed for the king's palace, skimming over mountains, plains and, naturally, any rivers that had to be crossed along the way.

He now had the boat but no crew. He came to a river fed by a creek, but water from the creek was not reaching the river, since just above the mouth of the river a huge man was kneeling on the bank drinking the creek dry.

“Good heavens, what a gullet!” exclaimed the boy. “How about coming along to the king's palace with me?”

The huge man took one more gulp, gurgled, and said, “Gladly, now that my thirst is somewhat quenched.” Then he came aboard.

The boat sped over water and over land and came to where a huge man was turning a hefty buffalo on a spit.

“Hello!” called the boy from the boat. “Would you like to come to the king's palace with me?”

“Gladly,” he answered. “Just give me time to eat this morsel here.”

“By all means.”

At that, the man popped the buffalo off the spit and into his mouth as if it were a roasted thrush. Then he came aboard and they moved onward.

The boat skimmed lakes and fields and came to another huge man leaning against a mountain.

“Hello!” called the captain of the boat. “Would you like to come along to the king's palace with me?”

“I can't move.”

“Why can't you?”

“Because if I don't lean against the mountain, it will fall down.”

“Let it fall.”

The man moved away, holding the mountain up with one hand, and jumped into the boat. The boat had no sooner sailed off than a boom and a rumble were heard, and the mountain came crashing down.

Gliding over roads and hills, the boat finally drew up before the king's palace. The boy disembarked and said, “Sacred Crown, with my own two hands I built this boat to go over land and water. Please keep your promise now and give me your daughter in marriage.”

The king, who wasn't expecting this, was dismayed and regretted his decree. Now he would have to give his daughter to some pauper he'd never laid eyes on.

“I'll give you my daughter,” replied the king, “on condition you and your crew eat every mouthful of the banquet I shall offer you, without leaving so much as one chicken wing or raisin on your plates.”

“Very well. When is this banquet to take place?”

“Tomorrow.” And he ordered a banquet of one thousand dishes, thinking, This ragamuffin certainly won't have a crew capable of putting away a spread like that.

The captain of the boat showed up with only one member of the crew, the man who ate buffaloes like roast birds. He ate and ate, chewing ten dishes one after the other, then swallowing a hundred whole, and on and on until he'd polished off one thousand. The king, who looked on speech
less, snapped out of his amazement to ask the servants, “Is there anything left in the kitchen?”

“There're still a few leftovers.”

The leftovers were brought in, and the man ate everything down to the last crumb.

“Of course you'll marry my daughter, but first I want to offer your crew all the wine in my cellar, which you must drink to the last drop.”

The drinker of rivers came in and drained a cask, then a barrel, then a demijohn. He even got his hands on the two flasks of malmsey the king had set aside for himself and emptied those with all the rest.

“Understand,” said the king, “I'm not in the least opposed to giving you my daughter. But there's the matter of the dowry that comes with her: dresser, cupboards, bed, washstand, linen, treasure chests, and everything else in the house. You must take it all away in one trip, immediately, with my daughter seated on top of the load.”

“Do you feel like a little work?” said the boy to the man who held up mountains.

“Do I!” he replied. “That's my weakness!”

They went up to the palace, and the boy said to the movers, “Are you ready? You can begin loading things onto his back.”

They brought out wardrobes, tables, and trunks of jewels and piled them on the big man's back all the way up to the roof. To get on top of the pile, the king's daughter had to climb to the tower of the palace and step off from there. Once she was on, the huge man called out, “Hold on tight, princess.” He ran all the way to the boat with everything and jumped aboard.

“Now fly, my boat,” commanded the boy, and the boat sped through the streets and town squares out across the fields.

Looking from his balcony, the king shouted, “After them! Seize them and bring them back in chains!”

The army charged after them, but was checked by the cloud of dust the boat stirred up.

The boy's father was overjoyed to see his youngest son return with a whole boatload of treasure and the king's daughter in a wedding dress. The boy had the most beautiful palace in the world built, gave one floor of it to his father and brothers, one to each of his companions, and kept all the rest for himself and his bride, the king's daughter.

 

(
Rome
)

100

Three soldiers had deserted their regiment and taken to the open road. One was a Roman, one a Florentine, while the smallest was a Neapolitan. After traveling far and wide, they were overtaken by darkness in a forest. The Roman, who was the oldest of the three, said, “Boys, this is no time for us all three to go to sleep. We must take turns keeping watch an hour at a time.”

He volunteered for the first watch, and the other two threw down their knapsacks, unrolled their blankets, and went fast asleep. The watch was almost up, when out of the forest rushed a giant.

“What are you doing here?” he asked the soldier.

“None of your business,” replied the soldier, without even bothering to turn around.

The giant lunged at him, but the soldier proved the swifter of the two by drawing his sword and cutting off the giant's head. Then he picked up the head with one hand and the body with the other and threw them into a nearby well. He carefully cleaned his sword, resheathed it, and called his companion who was supposed to keep the next watch. Before awakening him, though, he thought, I'd better say nothing about the giant, or this Florendne will take fright and flee. So when the Florentine was awake and asking, “Did you see anything?” the Roman replied, “Nothing at all, everything was as calm as could be.” Then he went to sleep.

The Florentine began his watch, and when it was just about up, here came another giant exactly like the first, who asked, “What are you doing here?”

“That's no business of yours or anybody else's,” answered the Florentine.

The giant sprang at him, but in a flash the soldier drew his sword and lopped off his head, which he picked up along with the body and threw into the well. His watch was up, and he thought, I'd better say nothing of this to the lily-livered Neapolitan. If he knew that things like this went on around here, he'd take to his heels and we'd never see him again.

So, when the Neapolitan asked, “Did you see any action?” the Florentine replied, “None at all, you've nothing to worry about.” Then he went to sleep.

The Neapolitan watched for almost an hour, and the forest was perfectly still. Suddenly the leaves rustled and out ran a giant. “What are you doing here?”

“What business is it of yours?” replied the Neapolitan.

The giant held up a hand that would have squashed the Neapolitan flatter than a pancake, had he not dodged it, brandished his sword, and swept off the giant's head, after which he threw the remains into the well.

It was the Roman's turn once more to keep watch, but the Neapolitan thought, I first want to see where the giant came from. He therefore plunged into the forest, spied a light, hastened toward it, and came to a cottage. Peeping through the keyhole, he saw three old women in conversation before the fireplace.

“It's already past midnight, and our husbands are not yet back,” said one.

“Do you suppose something has happened to them?” asked another.

“It might not be a bad idea,” said the third, “to go after them. What do you say?”

“Let's go right now,” said the first. “I'll carry the lantern that enables you to see a hundred miles ahead.”

“And I'll bring the sword,” said the second, “which in every sweep wipes out an army.”

“And I'll bring the shotgun that can kill the she-wolf at the king's palace,” said the third.

“Let's be on our way.” At that, they threw open the door.

Hiding behind the doorpost with sword in hand, the Neapolitan was all ready for them. Out came the first woman holding the lantern, and swish! her head flew off before she could say a single “Amen.” Out came the second, and swish! her soul sped to kingdom come. Out came the third and went the way of her sisters.

The soldier now had the witches' lantern, sword, and shotgun and decided to try them out immediately. “We'll just see if those three dotards were telling the truth.” He raised the lantern and saw an army a hundred miles away besieging a castle, and chained on the balcony was a she-wolf with flaming eyes. “Let's just see how the sword works.” He picked it up and swung it around, then raised the lantern once more and peered into space: every last warrior lay lifeless on the ground beside his splintered lance and dead horse. Then the Neapolitan picked up the gun and shot the she-wolf.

“Now I'll go and see everything from close up,” he said.

He walked and walked and finally reached the castle. His knocks and calls all went unanswered. He went inside and walked through all the rooms, but saw no one until he came to the most beautiful chamber of all, where a lovely maiden sat sleeping in a plush armchair.

The soldier went up to her, but she continued to sleep. One of her
slippers had dropped off her foot, and the soldier picked it up and put it in his pocket. Then he kissed her and tiptoed away.

He was no sooner gone than the sleeping maiden awakened. She called her maids of honor, who were also sleeping, in the next room. They woke up and ran to the princess, exclaiming, “The spell is broken! The spell is broken! We have awakened! The princess has awakened! Who could the knight be who freed us?”

“Quick,” said the princess, “look out the windows and see if you see anyone.”

The maids looked out and saw the massacred army and the slain she-wolf. Then the princess said, “Hurry to His Majesty, my father, and tell him a brave knight came and defeated the army that held me prisoner, killed the she-wolf that stood guard over me, and broke the evil spell by kissing me.” She glanced at her bare foot and added, “And then he went off with my left slipper.”

Overjoyed, the king had notices posted all over town:
WHOEVER COMES FORWARD AS MY DAUGHTER'S DELIVERER SHALL HAVE HER IN MARRIAGE, BE HE PRINCE OR PAUPER
.

In the meantime the Neapolitan had gone back to his companions in broad daylight. When he awakened them, they asked immediately, “Why didn't you call us earlier? How many hours did you watch?”

But he wasn't about to tell them all that had happened and simply said, “I was so wide-awake I watched the rest of the night.”

Time went by without bringing a soul to town to claim the princess as his rightful bride. “What can we do?” wondered the king.

The princess had an idea. “Papa, let's open a country inn and put up a sign that reads:
HERE YOU CAN EAT, DRINK, AND SLEEP AT NO CHARGE FOR THREE DAYS
. That will draw many people, and we'll surely hear something important.”

They opened the inn, with the king's daughter acting as innkeeper. Who should then come by but our three soldiers as hungry as bears, and singing as usual, in spite of hard times. They read the sign, and the Neapolitan said, “Boys, here you can eat and sleep for nothing.”

“Don't believe a word of it,” replied his companions. “They just say that, the better to cheat people.”

But the princess-innkeeper came out and invited them in, assuring them of the truth of every word of the sign. They entered the inn, and the princess served them a supper fit for a king. Then she took a seat at their table and said, “Well, what news do you bring from the world outside? Way off in the country like this, I never know what's going on elsewhere.”

“We have very little of interest to report, madam,” answered the
Roman who then smugly told of the time he was keeping watch when suddenly confronted by a giant whose head he cut off.

“Zounds!” exclaimed the Florentine. “I too had something similar happen to me,” and he told about his giant.

“And you, sir?” said the princess to the Neapolitan. “Has nothing ever happened to you?”

His companions burst out laughing. “You don't think he would have anything to tell, do you? Our friend here is such a coward he'd run and hide for a whole week if he heard a leaf rustle in the dark.”