Iron Cross: The Dartmouth Cobras #6 (42 page)

So he gave it to him.

* * * *

Deeper and deeper, intense burning, different from anything Tyler had ever experienced. He put his hands on Raif’s shoulders, keeping his body relaxed as Raif leaned down and began thrusting into him with long, slow strokes. A hard thrust made him wince, but Raif quickly adjusted the motion, his lips finding Tyler’s as he gently pressed in until his balls were against Tyler’s ass.

Fuck, this is…
He couldn’t find the right word to describe it. Incredible, erotic, overwhelming—they all fit. He’d never been so completely owned. The only thing that came close was when Chicklet put her collar around his neck, but even then she gave him some leeway to pleasure her. Raif had him completely pinned down, and all Tyler could do was take whatever he gave.

Raif smiled against his lips, rubbing his thigh, comforting him. “Is this so bad?”

Bad?
No, bad wasn’t a word he’d use for how having Raif inside him felt. But he didn’t want to be all serious and start confessing things that Raif wouldn’t believe. So he closed his eyes and shook his head. “The only thing that’s bad is you stopped moving.”

“Is that so?” Raif pulled out and Tyler opened his eyes to watch him drizzle more lube over his dick. He pushed Tyler’s legs farther apart and entered him again, slowly going in and out, until the stretching and burning became an endless stream of pleasure. He wrapped his hand around Tyler’s cock, stroking him in the same shallow rhythm. “You’re so fucking gorgeous like this, Ty, lying here and letting me fuck you.”

“Yeah?” Tyler groaned as Raif eased in a little more, pumping his dick harder. “You ain’t fucking me though. You’re acting like you’re afraid to break me.”

“Pushy sub.” Raif chuckled and released Tyler’s dick after running his fingers through the moisture at the tip. He slid in all the way as he brought his fingers to Tyler’s mouth, slicking precum over his lips. “Touch yourself. I won’t be so gentle anymore.”

Fisting his hand around his own dick, Tyler swore as Raif lifted his ass right off the bed, the thick muscles of his arms under Tyler’s knees. Dragging out and slamming in without another warning. Maybe he should have kept his mouth shut, but he couldn’t do anything but jerk himself off and cry out as pleasure rammed into him with each rough thrust. The motion slid him across the bed, but Raif pulled him back into place without slowing.

Harder, faster, then Raif adjusted the angle and Tyler came. He shouted as the pleasure rolled through him like thunder, deafening, tearing the world apart, lightning sizzled along the edges of reality. A final, merciless thrust had Tyler crying out again because he was so fucking raw he wasn’t sure he could take much more. Raw in a good way, but maybe Raif had been right to worry about breaking him. There didn’t seem like much would be left to put back together.

Still, he protested as Raif climbed off him. “You didn’t—”

“I did. You undid me with the taunt to fuck you harder.” Raif grinned and shook his head, continuing as he went to the bathroom, returning seconds later with the condom gone and a wet facecloth in his hand. “Which you will likely regret in the morning.”

The quick, efficient way Raif cleaned Tyler had him clamping his lips shut, too embarrassed to come up with a smart-assed reply. He covered himself with the sheet while Raif disposed of the facecloth, tempted to pretend to sleep so he didn’t end up having to talk about his feelings or something. There was only one thing he wanted to say to Raif, and he knew the man wouldn’t want to hear it.

Raif sat on the side of the bed, his brow furrowing as he studied Tyler’s face. “Do you regret—?”

“Fuck no! Where’d you get a stupid idea like that?” Tyler’s eyes widened as Raif’s fingers raked into his hair, his other hand slamming on his shoulder, pinning him to the bed, but not in a sexy way.

“Careful, boy. We may enjoy each other, but you will speak to me with respect.” Raif loosened his grip on Tyler’s hair. “Has your curiosity been satisfied?”

Tyler knew better than to be mouthy with a Dom, but Raif’s question pissed him off. He shoved at Raif’s chest. “Yeah, I was real curious, that’s why I did this. You don’t wanna hear anything else, so believe what you want. Get the fuck off me.”

“No.” Raif latched on to Tyler’s wrists and used the weight of his much bigger body to hold Tyler still. “What should I believe,
zlato moje
?”

Twisting, knowing he had no chance to get away, Tyler finally gave up and just glared at Raif. “I love you!”

Raif went still. Inhaled slowly, then nodded. “You’re right, I didn’t want to hear that. I’ve only been in love once—”

“Holy shit, you want to talk about
him
now? Are you fucking kidding me?” Tyler was going to punch Raif. And then he was going to walk down the hall and punch Zach too. Fuck being reasonable, he wasn’t sure he remembered how. “You know what, I was wrong. I fucking
hate
you!”

“Having a conversation with you would be much easier if I kept a gag on hand.” Raif sighed and framed Tyler’s face with his hands. “I’ve only been in love once
before
, Ty. I ruined that relationship. I would not give you the words unless I was sure, but I am. I love you, and it would be so much easier if I’d fallen for you first because if this doesn’t work out, I would be the only one to suffer.”

He loves me.
Tyler groaned and grabbed fistfuls of Raif’s hair, kissing him hard. He would forgive Raif for being stupid, being in love made you stupid. Nothing wrong with that. “You’ll suffer for falling in love with me, Raif. I’m going to drive you nuts. Just ask Chicklet.”

“Should that make me feel better?” Raif kissed him back, not questioning Tyler’s sudden shift from angry to joking, which was good. If Raif couldn’t keep up, they were gonna have a problem.

“Nope, I just figured you deserved fair warning. Do you want a sandwich? I’m starving.”

“A sandwich?” Raif pushed off him and looked over at the clock on the nightstand. “It’s past midnight.”

“So what? I’m always hungry after great sex. And if you’re eating, you ain’t making me talk about shit.” Tyler rolled off the bed and walked naked to the desk to grab the room service menu. “You can tell me you love me again though. I like hearing it.”

Raif laughed and came up behind Tyler, wrapping his arms over his chest. “I love you.”

Phone ringing in his ear, Tyler grinned. “Sorry, I missed that.”

“I am going to beat you. Order me some steak. I will need all my energy.” Raif kissed Tyler’s throat, then went back to bed. The mood was light as they waited for the food, not talking about anything more serious than the next game.

After they ate, Tyler plunked down on the bed and closed his eyes. But he couldn’t sleep until Raif pulled him close, surrounding him with strength and warmth. Softly repeating the words Tyler needed to hear, over and over, leaving him no reason to question them anymore.

“I love you.”

B
ack on her new favorite rock, Laura shed her coat, soaking in the sun which was blissfully warm for the first time in months. The weather was weird, bouncing from -3 to +10 overnight, but she wasn’t complaining. This wasn’t warm compared to what it was like in Kentucky in the spring, but she’d lived more than half her life in Canada, so she was used to anything less than bitter cold being quite comfortable.

What she wasn’t used to was having so much time to do
nothing
. Chicklet was in town, visiting with old friends—she’d asked Laura to come with her, but immediately retracted the offer when Laura admitted she wasn’t up to being around a lot of people.

She should be in her uniform now, getting ready to start another uncertain day either pulling over assholes for speeding or knocking on doors telling them to turn down their music. Or to make sure everyone was alive because the neighbor heard screaming. Damn it, how many officers were going to have to take on extra shifts to cover hers? Not just for a week or two so she could go on vacation, but for a whole
month
?

All right, focusing on that wouldn’t do her any good. She wasn’t on the job and there was no way to make returning to duty go any faster. She had to rest and see the shrink, and in the meantime, accept that she couldn’t help anyone.

In the distance she could see a stray cat chasing something across the rocky shore. Probably a mouse.

“…
you have claws too, don’t you, my little mouse?”

She frowned, recalling Raif’s words and the way he’d played along with all her plans, acting as though he cared about Tyler. She wasn’t blameless;
she
was the one who’d come up with the plan. She’d hoped Tyler would be happy with Raif, but she hadn’t known what kind of man Raif really was. Kinda like moving to a new apartment that wouldn’t allow pets and giving your puppy to people you hoped would love him, but instead used him in dog fights.

Tyler isn’t a puppy.

No, a puppy was a responsibility no one should take on lightly. Tyler wasn’t her responsibility. Or Chicklet’s. He was a grown man and he’d had some say in the matter.

That’s right. Feel better now?

Not in the least. After two years, Tyler was her friend, if nothing else. If she
hadn’t
had a hand in getting him involved with Raif, she’d have worried about him. She would have asked him how things were going and plotted out exactly where to bury Raif if he broke Tyler’s heart.

She mentally picked out a nice spot in the woods, smiling as she pictured the look on Raif’s face if he were here now and she pointed it out. Tyler had enough friends that all she’d have to do was start handing out shovels.

Down girl. Tyler’s probably fine.

And if he wasn’t?

Homicide wasn’t the only option. Laura took out her phone, wondering if she should call Raif and advise him to end things with Tyler, ever so nicely, before she had to get creative. Instead, she dialed Tyler’s number. She was a cop. She worked with facts.

Raif would be safe until Tyler gave her a reason to make him suffer.

Tyler answered after a few rings, sounding sleepy. “Hey, beautiful.”

“Hey. Did I wake you?”

“Naw, I’m just being lazy. Raif went out for a run, but I’m pretty sure I ain’t leaving this bed until we fly out to Philly tomorrow. I’m sore
everywhere
.”

“TMI, Tyler.”

“I’ve bought you tampons, Laura, there’s no such thing as too much info between us.” Tyler laughed as she grumbled at him. “Guess you don’t want details then?”

“Not particularly. I’ve watched you suck his dick—pretty sure I can figure out the rest.” None of it good. Tyler had let another man fuck him, which gave Raif enough power to do some serious damage. “Was he…gentle?”

“At first, but I thought you didn’t want details?”

“I don’t.”

“Okay, then all I can say is it was good. And I’m in love with the man. And he loves me too.” He paused. “I’m going to call Chicklet soon and tell her. Do you think she’ll be upset? I mean, I love her. I love you. That hasn’t changed.”

“And it won’t.” Laura sat forward, her stomach hurting a bit because she wasn’t sure what to do with Tyler’s love. She…she loved him too, but in what way? Because he was part of her life? He wasn’t her boyfriend, not really, but he
was
important to her. Friend…lover. Both labels fit, but she couldn’t quite make sense of how.

“You still there? I hoped this all wouldn’t bother Chicklet, but I didn’t think it would bother you.” Tyler continued before she could say anything. “I’m glad you’re okay.”

That surprised her. She blinked and cupped the phone against her cheek. “Okay? Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Someone tried to kill you. Raif said there were too many people at the hospital. That you needed your rest. I wanted to be there.”

She bit her bottom lip. “I’m fine. But you could have come—the doctor probably would have bitched, though. My brother pulled his badge and everything so he could stay.”

“I’m not surprised. He’s pretty cool.”

“Sometimes. Other times he’s a pain in my ass.”

“Speaking of which—”

Laura hummed loud, cutting Tyler off and making him laugh. She really liked talking to him, which was weird because he usually annoyed her. Or maybe not usually. Just lately.

But not now. She lay back on the sun-warmed rock and shielded her eyes from the sun. “I’m going crazy, Tyler. I miss work. I miss our house. I actually asked Chicklet if we could go meet you in New York, but we both know I’d be just as bored watching you play.”

“Gee, thanks.” Tyler snorted. “Whatcha doing now?”

“Sitting out in the sun. Chicklet’s with some friends.”

“Wanna watch a movie?”

“Over the phone?”

“Why not? Put it on FaceTime. I’ve got the perfect movie.”

She heard the music even as he positioned the phone and couldn’t help but smile. She held the phone in front of her, laughing as they watched
The Little Mermaid
, his face cutting in once in a while as he made silly commentary. The movie was almost over when her phone beeped a warning that her battery was under 10%.

“I have to go charge my phone, but before it dies…thank you, Tyler. I’m sure I’m still going to be messed up about what I did—”

“You did what you had to. I’m sorry it happened, but the way I see it, if he was crazy enough to go after you, he was dangerous to everyone around him. To someone who couldn’t defend themselves.” Tyler looked down, as if he wasn’t sure he was saying the right thing. “You have all kinds of professionals to help you through this. Other cops even. But that’s just what I think.”

“It helps. I’m glad we got to talk.” And with that, her phone died. She sighed and shoved it in her pocket. She should have brought up Raif again, found a way to warn Tyler that the man could hurt him. But Tyler was smart. Tougher than most people thought. He would be home in a few days, and maybe by then she’d have figured out how to prepare him for the inevitable.

She headed back to the house, waving as she spotted Chicklet standing in the driveway. She stopped as she realized Chicklet wasn’t alone. Laura’s foster mother, Debra Hamilton, stood with her.

Chicklet met Laura halfway, speaking low. “I know West said talking to her doesn’t count, but I thought it would do you some good.”

“It will, Mistress. Thank you.” Laura hesitated at Chicklet’s frown, not sure what she’d done wrong. But Debra was waving her over and Chicklet simply jerked her chin in the direction of Laura’s foster mother. Laura jogged to Debra, hugging her tight and smiling up at her.

Debra was almost as tall as Chicklet, but not as built. She had a lovely hourglass figure and long, dark brown hair that she let loose when she wasn’t working. She wore a soft pink silk blouse with a black knee-length skirt and sensible black heels. She must have come straight from the office, otherwise she’d be in jeans and a T-shirt.

Casually hooking her arm around Laura’s waist, Debra began walking toward the beach. “I’m hoping you won’t do like your brother and tell me if it doesn’t count in the paperwork, you’d rather not talk about what happened.”

Laura thought that was a very good answer, but she didn’t want her foster mother to feel like she’d come all the way here for nothing. “I’m happy to see you. We can talk if you want to.”

“I think I understand why Chicklet asked if I’d ever read any BDSM novels.”

Shocked, Laura stopped and faced Debra. “She—
what
?”

“Don’t look so surprised. Chicklet and I speak about a lot of things. She’s discreet, but she has mentioned how you can be excessively eager to please when things are bad.” Debra kissed the top of Laura’s head. “I could have told her that.”

“But I’m not—”

“Laura, you’re a daughter of the South. You can cook up a wonderful dinner, be the perfect hostess, and can fix mascara and red eyes after a funeral so no one would guess you’ve been crying. You forget, I was raised the same way.” She guided Laura to the very edge of the waves gently lapping the shore. “The difference is my mother would take me to my room and give me a pillow to scream into when someone upset me. If it was a boy, she’d tell me to go out there with a smile and act like nothing happened, while she’d be calling a few of my uncles because no one hurts her baby. Even when I wasn’t the perfect daughter though, I had two parents who loved me. I never had to wonder if I’d lose them if I said or did the wrong thing.”

“You married a good man and gave them a grandson.” Laura wrapped her arms around herself, slowing her pace. “My parents will never have that.”

“No, they won’t. But it’s not because you fell in love with another woman, Laura. It’s because they don’t
deserve to have you in their lives. Which, of course, may change if you decide you want them around.” Debra smiled ruefully and shook her head. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said most of that. I consider you my daughter, but only you can decide whether or not your parents get another chance.”

“They don’t. I’ve made my peace with losing them.”

“Have you?”

“Yes. I needed them, and they didn’t want me.” Laura’s throat locked. She stared down at the rocks jutting out of the wet sand. She’d discussed her parents with Debra before, but she’d never been so blunt.

“Sweetheart,
we
wanted you. But you worked so hard to be good enough, to fit with someone else’s idea of who you should be. You were so easy to love, but I couldn’t help wonder when you would break free and run a little wild. I was ready for it, but it never happened.”

Laura laughed. “Ryan was wild enough; you didn’t need me stirring up trouble.”

“But we would have loved you anyway.”

“I know.”

“Do you? Because I don’t remember you ever telling me or your father it wasn’t fair for Ryan to be able to go out later than we let you. When your father told you he didn’t like what you were wearing, you quietly went to your room and got changed.” Debra turned to face Laura, setting her hands on Laura’s shoulders. “We never fought in front of you or your brother, but as soon as you left the house, I would let him have it. Maybe I shouldn’t have waited. If you’d seen me fighting for you—”

“No!” Seeing her parents fight because of her would have been horrible. Laura shook her head. “I didn’t want to cause trouble.”

“There it is again. You wouldn’t have caused trouble. And even if you had, we loved you and wouldn’t have stopped.”

“I was so grateful for you taking me in! You had rules and I respected them! Why is that bad?” Laura pulled away from her mother as she realized she was shouting. She
never
shouted at Debra. “I’m sorry—”

“Don’t be. Hell, feel free to tell me to mind my own business.” Debra held up a hand and chuckled before Laura could say a word. “I know, you wouldn’t do such a horrible thing. Now, what would you prefer to talk about? The thug who attacked you or the young man you’ve been living with whom I’m only hearing about now?”

“Mom!” Laura had never heard Debra being so unprofessional talking about police work. “I killed a man—a very troubled man. You can’t call him a ‘thug.’”

“I most certainly can. I am not your therapist, I’m your mother. He tried to hurt my little girl, which makes me downright feral. Please forgive me for not being politically correct.” Despite her careless words, Debra’s tone was sharp. She put her hand on Laura’s shoulder. “There is no way I will be sorry that you did what you did. You’re alive. I only regret that you had to take a life, because it won’t be easy to live with. But the alternative is unacceptable.”

“Next time, I’ll do better.”

“Pray there won’t be a next time, but if there is, do what you have to. If not for yourself, consider the fact that if you hesitate, even for a second, you may be putting someone else at risk.”

Laura nodded and kept walking, not wanting to spend all her time with her mother dwelling on something they’d never agree on. There were protocols for a reason, and maybe if she’d followed them better, she would still have her badge.