Intrinsical (30 page)

“
You didn’t
die
; you were murdered.”

“
True.” That fact still chilled me to my very soul. I found myself still trembling slightly at the thought that someone had killed me. “I think I changed it enough to set it right. Maybe I created some sort of physical evidence so they can catch the jerk. And bring him to justice. Perhaps it was meant to be this way.”

I sat down next to Brent as understanding flooded through me, understanding I had refused to see before. “I do think I was meant to die. I think . . .” I blushed as I struggled to find the words. “I was meant to save you. This proves things can change. It’s too late for me, but we can still get your body back.” Brent looked uncertain but I knew I was right. “That’s what all of this is about— stopping the curse and returning you to your body.”

Did I want to die? No, but if my death saved Brent, then it meant something. Brent was such a good guy and still had so much to offer the world.

“
So, you’re proposing that it was the universe’s design that you die so I can live?”

“
Yes, and break the curse,” I said, wrapping my finger around one of the shredded ends of my dress.

“
Well, screw the universe.” Brent started out of his chair and leaned against the round table he had punched earlier, his back toward me.

Gathering my courage, I went to Brent and placed my hand on his arm. “It’s okay, Brent. I’m not sad. I never really understood how people could be willing to die to save someone they love, but I get that now.”

“
Love?” He asked the question guardedly, clamping down on the emotions I could read from him.

My heart rose to my throat. I tried to speak but found myself stuttering instead, “I . . . that . . . isn’t what I meant . . .” I gulped, dropping my hand from his arm.

Brent spun around. “What did you mean then?”

Words, thoughts, feelings all abandoned me as I stared into Brent’s eyes. A wide chasm seemed to separate us now and I wasn’t sure if a bridge could be built. A drop of water landed on my arm and was followed by more plinks of moisture. It took me a moment to realize that it was my tears that were wetting my arm. I was crying and I wasn’t sure why.

Brent rocked back on his heels and rubbed the back of his neck, not knowing how to respond. My slip of words had totally freaked him out. My chest constricted as I stared at him. I mean, it’s not as if I had meant the words, not in the way he was thinking; I totally didn’t—well, maybe I meant them a little, but he was completely overreacting. It was almost physically painful, like my heart was actually being squeezed hard, twisted in a vise. It released and then crushed in agony again. I brought my hand to my heart pressing against the pain. I felt an echoing, a reminder of something that had happened long ago, something I had experienced before but that I never had thought twice about. He let out a puff of air, avoiding my gaze. He stared at Steve, still bent over my body like it was fascinating, like he hadn’t seen it seventy times before.

The pain in my chest returned and I gasped from its intensity, folding myself in half. A clammy chill kissed my skin as the light dimmed, a black fog slipping past the corner of my vision. Pupils dilating, I glanced at Brent, his fingers flexing and unflexing, preparing for battle. He motioned for me to move closer. Still doubled over, I slid my foot closer to Brent but pain spasmed in me again and I stumbled, grabbing my chest, crumpling to the floor. I screamed in a mixture of terror and pain as a strong force grabbed my waist and yanked me away from Brent. He had been tracking the mist’s movement but wheeled toward me as I was dragged away from him, still struggling against my unseen foe.

The mist swirled angrily, following behind me. I didn’t understand; if the mist was still trying to capture me, then what had me? I had no idea where I was being taken, but I was more concerned for Brent who seemed unaware that the mist was drawing closer to him.

“
Run!” I screamed. He stood frozen in place, watching me being pulled further from him, his hand outstretched. Each side of Brent’s face stood out in stark contrast to the other. The flickering fluorescent light illuminated one half and the other was wrapped in darkness. It seemed to paint him as half hero and half villain.
“Go now!”
I begged hysterically.

Brent stepped toward me and I felt him trying to pull me back. Despite his strength, I continued sliding further from him, his efforts no more than a gentle tug.

My voice came out weakly, “Please, save yourself.”

The sensation in my chest was increasing in frequency and pressure. It had been painful at first but faint and irregular, now it was steady and strong. The feeling again reminded me of something. And suddenly I knew; my heart was beating again. Wildly I looked at Brent. He returned my gaze in understanding; he knew, too. He dropped his arms, his shoulders and head sagged as he released me. Brent’s shape was becoming lost as the world became too light and too dark at the same time.

I needed to make sure Brent was all right. I needed to know he had hadn’t been captured. I shook my head violently, trying to clear my vision. Everything had lost its color. In my stomach I felt a wrenching sting as the link between Brent and I was severed. In vain I tried to feel his fate before the darkness enveloped me.

Chapter 15

From far away, I heard a voice sweetly call my name, a voice I didn’t recognize. My eyelids felt like they had been anchored down and it required superhuman strength to open them. For half a second, I managed to peek out at the world. A woman who I didn’t know was standing beside me. After a few more attempts, I managed to keep my eyes open. A bright fluorescent light hummed above me. I didn’t understand where I was, but the woman was still there. She had a kind face that housed thoughtful hazel eyes, and long hair the color of molasses. I guessed she was a doctor by the white lab coat she was wearing and the stethoscope around her neck. I blinked at her in confusion.

“
Hello Yara. I’m Dr. McCubbin. Do you know why you’re here?”

It sounded like an easy enough question. As my mind grasped for answers I looked around for the first time. I was in a hospital room, sterile, devoid of personality, painted a non-descript color of white with a yellowing ceiling and faded charts clinging to the walls. A tattered chair was positioned next to my bed. I had no idea how I had ended up here. My head felt heavy as I pressed against the thin pillow. I lifted my hands to wipe at my eyes only to find them connected to an IV and several other machines.

“
No,” I answered hoarsely, my raw throat making my voice sound scratchy. I swallowed, trying to clear the sandpaper feel, but that only made it hurt more. In fact, my whole body ached, and I rearranged myself, trying to ease the throbbing pain and suffering. It didn’t help. “It hurts.”

The doctor smiled at me kindly, tapping my IV. “I know. The drugs will kick in soon.”

I closed my eyes, willing the drugs to work faster, taking the opportunity to try to remember why I needed to visit the hospital. I concentrated my thoughts backward, trying to replay events that had led me here. I remembered the dinner party Cherie had thrown, and then talking with Brent after it in the pool house. The idea of the pool brought a feeling of dread I was at a loss to explain.

The events seemed like a chalk drawing in a rainstorm, important details being washed away by the water, leaving behind a smudged slate. I attempted to coax my memory further, but it didn’t work. Every time I concentrated, the answers danced out of view, taunting me just out of reach, yet I knew what eluded me was important and it was vital that I remember.

Panic tightened around my heart and my chest clenched. I tried to breathe deeply but my lungs refused to comply. Shallow breaths were coming too fast and I was forced to close my eyes against the suddenly spinning room. I never would have believed how terrifying it could be not to remember and understand what had happened.

“
Why can’t I remember?”

With all the reassurance of a soothing mother, the doctor reached out and took my hand. “Sometimes our minds protect us from things that are too painful. I think the memories might come back to you, when and if you are ready.” My breathing still wouldn’t slow and I was afraid I would pass out. She slipped an oxygen mask over my mouth and pulled a chair over, sitting down as she slowly inhaled. “Breathe with me.” I nodded in understanding as I forced myself to follow her deep breaths. I had no idea how long it took, but finally I calmed.

“
Is it okay if I do my check up on you now? Your family would like to see you.” She motioned behind her.

I lifted the mask away from my face. “They’re here?”

When she nodded, a smile that radiated from the depths of my soul spread across my face and warmed every inch of my being. It felt like an eternity since I had seen them. I endured her questions and poking and prodding until I was cleared for visitors.

Soon Melanie, my older sister, who must have driven hours from her college to reach me here, flanked by Cherie, and Steve, entered the room. I was surprised not to see Brent with them. The doctor gave me a knowing smile as she left. “It’s remarkable that you three triplets look nothing alike.”

My brow wrinkle in confusion and for a brief second I wondered how hard I had hit my head.

“
They were only going to let family in,” Cherie explained as she sat beside me and curled herself into an upright ball. I nodded in understanding at my “siblings”. I felt the final tethers of anxiety subside. My memories would come back eventually, hopefully. All that mattered was that my loved ones surrounded me. The rest would work itself out.

Cherie’s eyes were red and swollen from crying. “You’re lucky you’re okay. I would never have forgiven you if you had died, Yara.”

I cleared my throat and flinched. “Was it really as serious as that?” The expressions on everyone’s faces was the only answer I needed.

“
The paramedics said if Steve hadn’t given you CPR, they would have been too late,” Melanie said, taking my hand as she sat beside me. She rested her chin on the bed’s metal bars. Her free hand used a Kleenex to wipe away the moisture that still leaked from her eyes.

I tried to make eye contact with Steve, my hero. For a second I caught his gaze but he looked away. He seemed almost . . . haunted, leaning in the corner, his arms folded.

“
It would seem that you brought me back from the dead.” When I said this, my heart beat hard against my ribs, as if recognizing the significance of my words more than my mind. “Thank you.”

Steve bowed majestically, seeming more like himself.

“ ‘
Tis all in a day’s work, m’lady. Know ye any more dragons that need slaying?”

Melanie’s cell phone started vibrating in her purse. She checked the screen and smiled. “It’s Mom and Dad. I better take this. Mom has been calling every fifteen minutes since the school called her.” I watched her leave, guilt twinging inside of me for causing so much worry to my loved ones.

“
Do you know what happened?” Cherie asked.

I shook my head, hoping to clear the fog in my memory. I could tell Cherie had tons of information to share but right as she opened her mouth the doctor came in.

“
I’m sorry but I’m going to have to ask all of you to leave now. She needs her rest.”

“
Doesn’t she get to come home with us?” Cherie pleaded with puppy dog eyes.

“
No. We need to keep her a while longer for observation.”

Cherie, to my surprise, stood up without protest. She hugged me tightly. “Don’t worry,” she whispered, “we’ll find a way back in.”

That sounded more like the Cherie I knew. As my grogginess increased I heard the doctor begin to explain what had happened to me but I couldn’t understand her words as I drifted off to sleep.

****

I woke with a start and my body complained. I searched my memory to see if any further clue about my accident had resurfaced, but the smudged slate was still my only answer.

“
Are you awake?”

I jumped in surprise.

A small chuckle escaped Steve’s throat. “Sorry to scare you.”

I turned to face him and stretched out my hand to loosen my aching muscles. My hands felt stiff and inflexible under all the bandages.

Steve answered my unasked question. “You scratched your hands pretty bad trying to free yourself before I got you out of the pool.”

“
The pool?”

“
You almost drowned, Yara,” Steve said, his blue eyes exhausted.

“
I did?” A flickering vision of struggling underwater flashed in my head but vanished before it could fully form. I examined my frayed nails and for a second I remembered my hand making contact with something. Try as I might, there was nothing more, and instantly the image I had conjured was lost behind the fog in my brain. I groaned in frustration.

“
And you saved me?”

Steve smiled into the right side of his mouth. “Yeah.”

“
So you’re the man of my dreams, huh?”