Intimate 02 - Intimate Surrender (34 page)

A shocked expression covered his face. Confusion followed. “Why on earth would I want to find someone else? I love you. I want to spend my life with you. You, Hannah. Not someone else.”

“But I have nothing to offer you. I can’t give you what you will want.”

“You can give me love. What more could I ask?”

“There’s more. You know there is!”

“What? What more is there?”

Hannah twisted out of his grasp, then turned to face him. “A son! I can’t give you a son!”

It took only a second or two for her admission to register. She couldn’t give him a son. Today was the first time she’d said the words aloud. The first time she’d admitted her inability to anyone. The first time she shed tears because she couldn’t have children.

She watched his face for the disappointment she was certain she’d see. An emotion appeared, but it wasn’t disillusionment. It was more understanding. More empathy than regret.

Silence engulfed the room as he looked at her. Then he slowly lifted his outstretched arms. “Come here, my love.”

His voice was little more than a whisper, but it beckoned to her to come to him for comfort. She didn’t hesitate, but ran to his embrace.

When she reached him, he wrapped his strong, muscular arms around her and pulled her close to him.

This was the comfort she needed but had somehow survived without.

Rafe lifted her in his arms and carried her to a large wing chair that sat before the lifeless fire. He placed her on the cushion, then walked to the grate and added some wood. It wasn’t long before a fire came to life. When he was assured it would keep burning, he returned to the chair and lifted her in his arms, then sat with her in his lap.

“Tell me what happened,” he said softly.

Hannah shook her head. “It doesn’t matter. It was a long time ago.”

“It matters to me. And I know it still matters to you.”

Hannah nestled against him and tucked her head beneath his chin.

“Tell me, Hannah.”

She took a deep breath and forced herself to remember a part of her past she’d tried to forget. “I made my way to Grace and Caroline’s after I was raped. They took me to a woman who lived near the village. Everyone called her
Granny. She was a healer. I overheard her tell Grace and Caroline that she didn’t think I’d live. But I did.”

Rafe’s hand rubbed gentle circles on her flesh, and Hannah thought how comforting his touch was. She didn’t ever want to give that feeling up.

“I was with Granny almost three months before we knew for sure that I was carrying a child. Knowing that I’d have a child to care for terrified me. I wasn’t able to take care of myself, let alone a babe.” Hannah wiped a tear from her cheek. “But I didn’t have to worry. Not even a week after I realized I was carrying, I lost the babe.”

“Oh, Hannah.”

“I’m not sure what happened, Granny said she didn’t know, but she told me I would never be able to have children. That my body wouldn’t carry a babe.”

“And you think that because you can’t give me a child, I won’t want you?”

She buried her face deeper against him. “Every man wants a son to carry on his name. I can’t give you that, Rafe.”

Before Hannah could continue her explanation, Rafe held her so she had no choice but to look into his eyes. What she saw wrapped around her heart like a warm blanket to protect her.

“I want you, Hannah. I want to spend every day and every night with
you
. Haven’t you learned by now that I’m not like every other man you know?” He lowered his head and kissed her on the mouth. “I love you. I want you. If I want children, I only have to go to the nursery and hold any one of the precious babes there.”

Hannah tried to stop the tears from streaming down her cheeks, but it was impossible. How had she found a man
so perfect? After the life she’d led, why did she deserve to be so blessed?

She wrapped her arms around Rafe’s neck and brought his head closer to her. “Kiss me, Rafe. Love me.”

“Whatever my lady desires,” he whispered, then rose with her in his arms and carried her to the bed.

R
afe looked across the room to where his bride stood talking to Grace, the Duchess of Raeborn, Caroline, the Marchioness of Wedgewood, and several more of Caroline’s sisters. If any members of Society would walk in on the gathering, they would swoon at the sight. Joining the conversation alongside Lady Wedgewood and the Duchess of Raeborn were several of Madam Genevieve’s prostitutes. Rafe recognized Delores and Savannah and Constance and…

“It’s quite a gathering, isn’t it?” a familiar voice said from beside him.

Rafe looked down to see Dalia, the new Madam Genevieve. He smiled. “Yes, quite a gathering.” He nodded to the opposite side of the room where most of the children and young adults from Coventry Cottage stood near the refreshment table. “I’m not sure Society would believe the report of a gathering that included a duke and duchess, a marquess and marchioness, more than one earl and countess, and a viscount and baron thrown in for good measure, along with a half dozen of London’s most well-known ladies of the night and Madam Genevieve herself.”

Dalia laughed. “What I think Society would find even more unbelievable was the news of the nuptials of Reverend Rafael Waterford and London’s former Madam Genevieve.”

Rafe laughed. “That would set them on their ears, wouldn’t it?”

“Yes, it would.”

Rafe turned serious. “I’d like to thank you, Dalia.”

“For what?”

“For offering to take over Madam Genevieve’s. For giving Hannah back to me.”

“You didn’t get her
back
, Vicar. You always had her.”

He shook his head. “I thought I’d lost her when she held the auction. That was her intent. To drive me away. To prove to me that she wasn’t worthy to associate with me.”

A frown covered Dalia’s face. “You don’t know the real reason, do you?”

“The real reason?” This was something new. There was something Hannah hadn’t told him, and he knew it was important that he find out what that was.

“Skinner.”

“Skinner?”

“You’re correct in that she wanted to drive you away. In fact, she was desperate to have you gone. But not because she didn’t love you. Because she loved you so much.”

Rafe shook his head. “I don’t understand.”

“Skinner was dogged in his determination to put a halt to Genevieve rescuing the children before his perverted customers could ruin them. She’d taken a huge bite out of his income, and he was desperate to stop her. And he used you to accomplish that.”

“Me?”

“Yes, he put a ten-thousand-pound marker on your head.”

Rafe found it impossible to speak for several moments. “He offered money to have me killed?”

“A lot of money. Hannah knew if she didn’t do something to force you to leave London, you wouldn’t live. Men who do that kind of work would kill someone for a tenth that much.”

“Where is Skinner now?”

“Dead. After the auction, Hannah received a message saying that Skinner had Delores. Hannah went to get her.”

“By herself?”

“You know Hannah. She would have faced the devil himself if he intended to harm someone she cared for. Luckily, the other bordello owners arrived before any real trouble started.”

“She didn’t tell me that.”

Dalia smiled. “That shouldn’t surprise you.”

“No, I guess not.”

“At least Skinner can’t destroy any more lives,” she said. “And the streets are, if not safe, at least a little less dangerous for innocent young girls who arrive.”

Rafe looked over to where Hannah still stood talking to her friends. “She’s a remarkable woman,” he said, realizing for the hundredth time that he was the most fortunate man on the face of the earth.

“Yes, remarkable.”

Hannah chose that moment to look at him. Their gazes locked, and he hoped she read in his eyes the love he felt for her. He thought maybe she did, because she excused herself from the other women and walked toward him.

“I hope you spent a great deal of your conversation with Dalia telling her how fortunate I am that you agreed to marry me,” she said with a smile on her beautiful face.

“Absolutely,” he said, quickly kissing her on the lips. “Except I may have mentioned once or twice that I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of the earth to have you as my wife.” Rafe kissed her again, but broke off their kiss when their friends and family applauded.

“I think,” Rafe said, placing his palm beneath Hannah’s elbow, “that we had better spend some time with our guests before this perfect day comes to an end.”

“It has been perfect, Rafe,” Hannah said, tilting her head to look him in the eyes.

“And I promise you, the most perfect part of the day is yet to come.”

Several hours later, Rafe lay with Hannah in his arms. They’d stayed below until all their guests had retired to their rooms, then made their way to the room they would share for the rest of their lives.

But before they retired for the night, they stopped at the nursery, as was their nightly habit, to check on little Rachael and the other babes. Rachael was special to them—especially to Rafe. She was like a daughter to him, and Hannah often found him in the nursery holding her and talking to her. Hannah may not be able to give him a babe, but he would never lack for a family. Their home would overflow with children.

Their lovemaking had been perfect. How could it not be when he had the most perfect woman for his wife?

“I love you, Hannah,” he repeated again. “You’ve made me the happiest man alive.”

Hannah rose above him and kissed him on the mouth. “And I love you. You’ve given me everything I’d always dreamed of. Everything I thought was beyond my reach.”

“Nothing is beyond your reach, Hannah. You’ve proven that over and over.”

“Oh, Rafe.” She kissed him again, then rolled to the side and opened a drawer in the table nearest the bed. “I have a gift for you.”

“A gift?”

“Yes, something I think you’ll like very much.”

“I have everything I’ll ever want or need, Hannah. Right here.”

“But this is something special.” She pulled a small box from the drawer and handed it to him.

Rafe sat up in bed, then unwrapped the box. He looked at the expectant expression on Hannah’s face and knew whatever was in the box was special. He vowed he would love her gift no matter what it was, simply because Hannah had given it to him, and because he could tell it was important to her that he like it.

“The wrapping is very nice, Hannah. Perhaps I should put it on the mantel to look at it for a day or two before I tear the paper.”

She punched him on the arm. “Open it. Now. Please.”

Rafe laughed, then tore the paper from the box.

He lifted the lid and looked into the box. His heart skipped a beat and his fingers trembled as he reached into the box and lifted out his gift.

It was his grandfather’s watch.

“Oh, Hannah,” he whispered, fingering the jewels and the raised filigree. “How did you—”

“It doesn’t matter,” she answered. She placed her hand on the watch and turned it over in Rafe’s hand. “In all things, be
noble
,” she whispered. “You are the only person I know who fits those words. You are the only one who should carry your grandfather’s legacy.”

Rafe’s heart swelled inside his chest. He felt as if he’d been given the most special gift in the world. And by the most special woman in the world. A woman beyond any price.