Insatiable (28 page)

S
aleema pulled up in front of Terelle’s apartment building. Saleema’s nerves were so shot, she wasn’t sure if she could safely drive home. From her peripheral vision she could see Terelle staring straight ahead, looking like a wild-eyed lunatic.

Sobbing one minute and laughing crazily the next, Terelle seemed to be losing it, but Saleema was too frazzled by the entire ordeal to be of further assistance. As far as she was concerned, Terelle had pushed their friendship to the limit. She didn’t really know whether Marquise was dead or alive, but she realized that without a doubt, it was time to get ghost. In fact, the trip to Aruba offered by one of her johns, was starting to sound like damn good idea. Saleema didn’t want to see or hear another word about Marquise Whitsett for a long, long time.

“You’re home, Terelle. Go ahead in. I’ll talk to you later.”

“You comin’ up?” Terelle asked in an annoying whimper.

Saleema screwed up her lips and shook her head no.

Terelle sucked her teeth, sighed and slowly departed the SUV.

Saleema didn’t wait for Terelle to open the front door. With tires screeching, she sped away, leaving long black skid marks down Kingsessing Avenue.

Upstairs in her apartment, Terelle walked in circles as she tried to figure out what to do. Which hospital was near Columbus Boulevard? Hannemann? Yeah, Hannemann University Hospital was probably the closest to Dave & Buster’s. But then again, they may have taken Marquise to Thomas Jefferson University Hospital. Deciding to call Hannemann first, she reached for the phone. When it occurred to her that she was probably a suspect in the shooting, she quickly withdrew her hand. Of course, he’d only been grazed, but nevertheless, a gun was involved and she’d be questioned—interrogated. No, it wasn’t a good idea to call the hospital.

She glanced at the phone and noticed the blinking message light. Seized by a sense of forlorn and filled with a premonition that bad news loomed, she refused to retrieve the messages. Terelle stumbled backwards, away from the phone.

The phone rang. The sudden sound of its peal caused Terelle’s heart to pump.

“Hello?” she said, sounding frightened.

“Terelle, this is Aunt Bennie.” Aunt Bennie’s voice sounded like the voice of doom. Terelle’s stomach clenched..
Dear Lord, please don’t let her say anything about Marquise.

Aunt Bennie spoke each word softly and slowly as if a higher pitch and faster pace might cause physical pain. “I know you aren’t prepared for this…” she continued in that horribly droning tone.

“What? What’s wrong, Aunt Bennie? Tell me,” Terelle shouted. She needed to know what had happened to Marquise right now!

“Your grandmother passed today. I’ve been trying to reach you for hours.”

With great relief, Terelle exhaled. If Gran was dead, then Marquise had to be alive. It was impossible for two people whom she loved to die on the same day. God wouldn’t do that; he’d never be that cruel.

Relieved that she could stop worrying about Marquise, Terelle was suddenly animated. “I’ll be right over, Aunt Bennie. You holding up okay? Want me to pick up anything from the store?”

“I’m okay for now. I guess it hasn’t settled in yet. No, I don’t need anything but you. You get here as fast as you can.” Aunt Bennie’s tone changed to an even lower volume. “Cassy’s here.” Then, in a voice barely above a whisper she said, “Your mother looks bad, Terelle. Skinny as a rail. And she’s taking Mom’s death so hard, me and Sheila are thinking about taking her over to the emergency room at Presbyterian to see if the doctor can give her something to calm her down.”

Terelle’s thoughts shifted to Marquise. Had he been taken to Presbyterian? If that were a possibility she’d insist on taking her mother to Presbyterian just so she could check on Marquise. But no…Marquise had gotten hurt near Penn’s Landing and that was some distance from West Philly.

“How’s Keeta?” Terelle asked, refusing to show compassion for her mother.

“She’s fine. Watching cartoons, eating snacks…you know. She’s too young to understand any of this. But she’s been crying for you…and every now and then she cries for Quise.” Terelle’s heart dropped.

“Okay, Aunt Bennie, I’m on my way.” Terelle hung up feeling sad for Markeeta, but was cheered in the knowing that she, Markeeta and Marquise would soon be reunited as the family they were destined to be. Marquise was alive! She could feel it. As soon as she’d paid her respects to Aunt Bennie and any other family members who turned up, she would scoop up Markeeta and be out!

Despite everything, even what she’d seen with her own eyes, Terelle knew that Marquise didn’t want Kai. That social worker had some kind of hold on him. But not for long. Terelle intended to reclaim her man tonight!

Comforted by the reverie, Terelle went to her bureau drawer, pulled out her engagement ring, put it on and held out her hand in admiration. She happily bounded the stairs of her apartment building and set off to walk to Woodland Avenue to catch the 11 trolley.

While walking, she told herself that the first thing she had to do was contact Ayanna. By now, Ayanna had to know something. Damn, she wished she had a cell phone! She stopped briefly in front of the pay phone on the Avenue, but she knew the damn thing only worked when it wanted to. Only fools risked putting money into that tricked-up equipment.

Terelle moved on. Brainstorming, her musings turned back to Ayanna. Surely, Ayanna’s boyfriend, Jalil would know something and he would have shared that information with Ayanna. She would call Ayanna the second she arrived at Aunt Bennie’s house.

Bouncing along Woodland Avenue, Terelle fantasized a scenario where she screamed hysterically the moment Ayanna spoke the words
shot
and
Marquise
in the same sentence.
“They don’t know who did it; but the good thing is…he ain’t hurt bad,”
she imagined Ayanna saying,
“The bullet just grazed ‘em, but girl, whatchu waitin’ for? You better get over to the hospital, Jalil said that yella hussy is up in there takin’ over and tryin’ to act like she’s Marquise’s wife.”

His wife, my ass!
Terelle though with indignation as she reached the trolley stop. She’d see about that shit! There’d be a showdown in the hospital room. She twisted her engagement ring around; its presence would convince the hospital staff that she was his fiancée and soon-to-be wife. She knew that once Marquise saw her face, he’d come to his senses and send that half-white bitch packing.

Visualizing Kai getting booted out of Marquise’s room brought a smile to Terelle’s face. The smile, however, swiftly changed to a perplexed scowl when it dawned on her that she still had no idea of Marquise’s condition or his whereabouts. She stopped in her tracks, as if the answer would elude her if she continued moving. Which hospital, she wondered again? Which trolley or bus would get her there? Maybe she should call Saleema for a ride, she mused as she resumed walking. No, Saleema’s nerves were shot! Terelle didn’t dare ask her girl for any more favors for a while. Hell, she would walk to the hospital if she had to. Grow wings and fly—whatever. Terelle threw her head back and laughed as she imagined herself flying. It was loud raucous, inappropriate laughter. People stared, but she truly didn’t care. The thought of showering Marquise with kisses caused Terelle to scream in sheer delight. Passers-by looked at her strangely, but Terelle stared right back and muttered, “W
hat’s your fuckin’ problem
?”

She knew with all her heart that everything was okay. Marquise was okay. She also knew that despite Saleema’s anger toward Marquise, her girl would be pleased to see him and Terelle back together. This near tragedy would bring Saleema and Marquise closer—they’d finally let go of the past and become friends. Terelle giggled at the thought of the three of them chillin’ together without anyone making sarcastic or hurtful remarks. Ah! Life was so good.

Terelle reached the trolley stop and briefly stood still to wait for the 11. But, troubling thoughts swirled in her head. What would she do if Marquise ever found out she was responsible for his pain? Frowning and mumbling, Terelle shook her head and began pacing back and forth. A group of people who were also waiting for the trolley murmured in confusion and inched away from Terelle. Oblivious to the scowls and quizzical glances of her fellow travelers, Terelle commenced to carrying on a one-sided conversation.
Quise knows I’m scared to death of guns; Not a soul on this earth would be able to convince him that I pulled the trigger of that gun. Shit, he’ll probably think somebody from his past shot him. Yeah, he’ll blame this mess on some old drug debt he owes.

She silently asked God to forgive her. Then, a warm feeling moved through her body and she knew He had forgiven her.

Thank you, Lord
, she cried as she fell to her knees and held her hands in prayer. There was a startled and collective cry of disbelief as passengers waiting for the trolley cautiously moved further away from Terelle; some walked to the curb anxiously searching for the trolley while craning their necks back at the crazy woman on her knees in prayer.

Finishing her prayer, Terelle stood and brushed the dirt off her knees, comforted by the thought: G
od doesn’t give you more than you can bear.

“
O
h Jesus!” Aunt Bennie cried out when she opened the door and saw Terelle. Terelle was filthy, like an auto mechanic after a hard day’s work. Dried mucous stained her oil-streaked face. Terelle, unaware of her startling appearance, opened her arms to embrace Aunt Bennie.

“I’m so sorry, baby,” Aunt Bennie said in a choked voice. “We knew you were gonna take it real hard that’s why we didn’t want you to find out until you got here.” Aunt Bennie hugged Terelle tight. “I want you to know your family…and your mother too…” Aunt Bennie said as she cut a worried eye at Terelle’s mother who was standing in the background, clutching her hands together nervously and wearing a grim expression. “We’re all gonna see you through this. Ain’t that right, Cassy?” Cassandra nodded quickly and attempted to cast a loving gaze in Terelle’s direction.

Terelle ignored her and turned her attention back to Aunt Bennie. “Why y’all acting so strange? I’m glad you told me about Gran. I got here as fast as I could so I can help out with the funeral arrangements and everything. Where’s Keeta?”

Markeeta came running from the kitchen. “Mommy!” Markeeta ran excitedly toward her mother, but took one curious look and backed away. “Mommy dirty,” Markeeta said, wrinkling her nose.

Terelle looked down, appraised the condition of her clothing and shrugged. “Come here, girl. Mommy was in such a rush to get here; I didn’t have time to change my clothes. Give me a kiss!”

Markeeta shook her head no. Laughing, she ran toward Aunt Bennie.

“Come here, Keeta. Come sit on Grandma’s lap,” Cassandra offered.

“I’ll take care of Keeta, Bennie. You deal with Terelle,” Cassandra said as she lifted Markeeta onto her scrawny lap. “I want to talk to my daughter in private—later.”

Terelle shot a look of pure hatred at her mother. “You ain’t got shit to say to me.”

Cassandra’s mouth fell open. Embarrassed and at a lost for words, Cassandra closed her mouth and bounced Markeeta on her knee. Markeeta squirmed. “You wanna watch cartoons or something, Keeta?” Cassandra asked

“No, I wanna watch Daddy on TV,” Markeeta replied.

“What did you say, Keeta? What did you say about Daddy?” Terelle wanted to know.

“Terelle this is a time when families gotta come together; I want you to listen to what your mother has to say. It might help.”

“Whatever,” Terelle said, jerking her body to show her disgust.

“You heard her, Bennie; she don’t wanna talk to me.”

“You’re her mother!” Aunt Bennie exploded. “Get up and talk to her! Can’t you see she’s in shock?”

“I’m not in shock. What’s wrong with y’all?”

Finally stepping up to the plate, Cassandra stood up took Terelle’s hand and led her into Gran’s bedroom. Aunt Bennie solemnly nodded, urging Terelle to go talk to her mother.

They sat on Gran’s old-fashioned four-poster bed. With both hands, Cassandra lightly grasped Terelle’s. Looking into her daughter’s eyes intently she said:

“I’ve been a terrible mother…”

“I know that’s right,” Terelle said defiantly.

Cassandra sighed and pressed on. “I’ve done things that I know you’ll never forgive or forget, but I’ve always loved you Terelle.”

“Hmph! You gotta strange way of showing it, Mom” Tears began streaming down Terelle’s cheeks.

“I know, baby. I’m so sorry. But this addiction…”

“Yeah, whatever…you finished?” Terelle stood up.

“No, Cassandra whispered, urging Terelle with a tug to sit back down.

Terelle reluctantly complied. She lowered her head, refusing to meet her mother’s gaze, afraid that if she looked into her eyes the love she’d always felt would come pouring out in torrents. Her mother didn’t deserve her love, so she kept her head down.

“The worst thing I ever did was to tell you that big lie about Marquise.”

Her interest piqued, Terelle raised her head. “What lie?”

“Marquise never made me perform oral sex. Never! When he first started hustlin’ he wouldn’t even sell me drugs…outta respect to you. But when he found out I was doing whatever I had to do with his squad and anybody else who had ten dollars, he started giving me money and drugs. He was embarrassed that his girl’s mom was out there freakin’ for drugs. To get high, I’d sell my body in cars, abandoned houses, alleyways…you name it. And Marquise thought if he gave me drugs I wouldn’t have to trick anymore. But what he gave me wasn’t enough for my addiction.” Cassandra gave a heavy sigh.

“I figured out where he kept his stash—and I took it…all of it. A big-ass duffel bag filled with blow. It hadn’t even been cooked-up yet.” The memory seemed to make Cassandra’s eyes glaze over in ecstasy. Terelle felt like killing her, but wanting to hear the rest of the story, she restrained herself.

“After that, the big boys came through—lookin’ for him. They fucked him up real bad and then gave him two days to get their money. “

Terelle’s mind raced back to the time Marquise had a busted lip and sore ribs. She regarded her mother with loathing. “Mom! How could you do that to Quise?”

“It wasn’t personal. I…”

“What happened next?” Terelle cut her mother off mid sentence.

“I heard that his friend, Jalil fronted him a couple hundred worth of weed and some wet. But you know how slow that shit moves. Marquise was on his grind day and night. He wasn’t gittin’ no sleep. Tired and not on top of his game, he made a mistake and sold a couple dime bags to a narc.”

Terelle remembered that night well. After the narc had identified himself, Marquise had tried to ditch the rest of the weed and the wet he had stashed in his pockets and tucked in secret compartments inside his boots.

“Marquise went to jail because I stole one of his packages,” Cassandra confessed. “After he found out that I took his shit, he came after me. But on the strength that I’m your mother, he gave me twenty-four hours to get his money. I tried, but I couldn’t get it. Then, when the big boys came back looking for him…he got scared and started taking all kinds of risks. That’s why he slipped up and sold that weed to a cop.”

Terelle sobbed. “If you knew you caused Quise to get knocked, why did you talk so bad about him the whole time he was locked up? You acted like you hated him.”

“I hated myself,” Cassandra said sadly. “Still do…and now that he’s gone, I’m gonna get myself clean once and for all. I have to…for Quise.”

“WHAT!” Terelle sprang up from the bed. “He’s what? Don’t play with me, you bitch!” Looking like a madwoman, with eyes blazing, Terelle got up in her mother’s face.

“He’s dead, Terelle…” Cassandra shrank back, cowering from her daughter’s raised fist.

Having heard the commotion, Aunt Bennie and Sheila with Markeeta toddling on their heels, ran screaming into the bedroom. Cassandra was on the floor, curled into a knot. Terelle, looking like a raving lunatic, was stomping her mother senseless.

“Stop it, Terelle!” Aunt Bennie cried. Both Aunt Bennie and Sheila tried to pull Terelle away, but Terelle had the strength of three burly men.

“Quise…ain’t…dead!” Terelle screamed. Each word was accompanied by a kick in her mother’s ribs.

“He’s dead, Terelle,” Aunt Bennie screamed as she desperately tried to pull Terelle away from Cassandra. “We thought you knew. Figured you’d found out before you got here…and your grief…well, we thought your clothes were all messed up because um…maybe you went crazy or something when you found out.” Aunt Bennie looked for some support from her lover, but Sheila, stunned into silence, was mute. She was apparently unwilling to speak a word that might set off the crazed young woman.

“Some woman killed Marquise,” Aunt Bennie went on. “She shot ’em and then ran over him with her car and tried to leave the scene of the crime, but two witnesses saw the whole thing and the police caught up with her somewhere near Penn’s Landing. It’s been on the news for the last couple hours.”

“Quise ain’t dead!” Terelle insisted. Her angry fist aimed for her aunt. Aunt Bennie ducked. She and Sheila tried to restrain her, but Terelle easily broke free from their feeble grasp.

Needing to hurt someone, Terelle took a few steps backward and then assaulted her mother with a running kick in the ribs. Unconscious, Cassandra jerked and groaned from the blow. Markeeta, Aunt Bennie, and Sheila all screamed.

Terelle had to be stopped before she killed Cassandra. Not knowing what else to do, Aunt Bennie leaped on Terelle’s back and sank her teeth deep into her niece’s shoulder.

Terelle welcomed the pain. Like a wounded animal, she bared her teeth, threw her head back and howled Marquise’s name.