Insane City (49 page)

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Authors: Dave Barry

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for the wedding ceremony, then sell it and buy a less expensive ring, plus a house.

After the ceremony they had a picnic reception on the beach, catered by the Majestic Transglobal

Rooster. They drank beer and laughed and told stories and sang and danced in the sand.

As dusk crept over the ocean, Seth saw Laurette standing alone, looking out toward the place where

he’d rescued her. She turned, saw him watching her, and smiled.

“Thank you,” she said.

“Mêci,”
he answered.

Then night fell, and Laurette and Carl took their sleepy children home. One by one, the other guests

also left, except for Duane, who passed out on the beach with Blossom coiled on his chest.

Finally there was nobody left awake but Seth and Cyndi, sitting close together on the sand, the two of

them watching the full moon rise, big and bright, making the restless dark ocean shimmer and shine.

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Thanks to my wonderful friends and semi-relatives Ron and Sonia Ungerman, who helped me figure out

the plot for this book on a sailboat in the British Virgin Islands, even though by the next morning we’d

forgotten everything.

Thanks to Judi Smith, for always knowing what I’m supposed to do next.

Thanks to Neil Nyren for being the calmest editor alive, and to Ivan Held and Susan Petersen

Kennedy for their unflagging support, not to mention always paying for lunch.

Thanks to Michael Barson and Katie McKee for making book tours feel almost like some sick,

twisted kind of fun.

Thanks to Amy Berkower and the folks at Writers House for their diligence and guidance, and above

all for attaching those little stickers that show where I’m supposed to sign.

Thanks to my friend and bandmate Ridley Pearson, for all the gimlets.

Finally, thanks to the people of the truly insane city of Miami, for making this job easy. Without you,

this book wouldn’t exist; any errors in it are strictly your fault.

Also by Dave Barry

FICTION

Lunatics

(with Alan Zweibel)

The Bridge to Never Land

(with Ridley Pearson)

Peter and the Sword of Mercy

(with Ridley Pearson)

Science Fair

(with Ridley Pearson)

Peter and the Secret of Rundoon

(with Ridley Pearson)

Cave of the Dark Wind

(with Ridley Pearson)

The Shepherd, the Angel, and Walter the Christmas Miracle Dog

Escape from the Carnivale

(with Ridley Pearson)

Peter and the Shadow Thieves

(with Ridley Pearson)

Peter and the Starcatchers

(with Ridley Pearson)

Tricky Business

Big Trouble

NONFICTION

I’ll Mature When I’m Dead

Dave Barry’s History of the Millennium (So Far)

Dave Barry’s Money Secrets

Boogers Are My Beat

Dave Barry Hits Below the Beltway

Dave Barry Is Not Taking This Sitting Down

Dave Barry Turns 50

Dave Barry Is from Mars and Venus

Dave Barry’s Book of Bad Songs

Dave Barry in Cyberspace

Dave Barry’s Complete Guide to Guys

Dave Barry Is
NOT
Making This Up

Dave Barry Does Japan

Dave Barry’s Only Travel Guide You’ll Ever Need

Dave Barry Talks Back

Dave Barry Turns 40

Dave Barry Slept Here

Dave Barry’s Greatest Hits

Dave Barry’s Homes and Other Black Holes

Dave Barry’s Guide to Marriage and/or Sex

Dave Barry’s Bad Habits

Claw Your Way to the Top

Stay Fit and Healthy Until You’re Dead

Babies and Other Hazards of Sex

The Taming of the Screw

Document Outline

ALSO BY DAVE BARRY
TITLE PAGE
COPYRIGHT
DEDICATION
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Chapter 40
Chapter 41
Chapter 42
Chapter 43
Chapter 44
Chapter 45
Chapter 46
Chapter 47
Chapter 48
Chapter 49
Chapter 50
Chapter 51
Chapter 52
Chapter 53
Chapter 54
Chapter 55
Chapter 56
Chapter 57
Chapter 58
Chapter 59
Chapter 60
Chapter 61
Chapter 62
Chapter 63
Chapter 64
Chapter 65
Chapter 66
Chapter 67
Chapter 68
Chapter 69
Chapter 70
Chapter 71
Chapter 72
Chapter 73
Chapter 74
Chapter 75
Chapter 76
Chapter 77
Chapter 78
Epilogue
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Table of Contents

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