Inner Demons (6 page)

That night, alone in my room, I worked on glamours and thought about Brooke's ceremony. The more I practiced, the stronger I felt. No one knew I could do a glamour, so what if I made myself look like one of the Order, then just walked into the ceremony like I was one of them?

I shook my head. I had no idea what the members of the Order looked like when they did one of these rituals. For all I knew, they could show up all wearing pink tutu's and tiaras. I couldn't count on seeing them far enough in advance to work up an identical glamour. I needed to find another way in.

What if I could make myself into something super small? Something that wouldn't be noticed in the room. But what? A fly? A speck of dust? A mouse? I had no idea if I could do a glamour that would change my size so drastically.

Lark had said those kinds of glamours didn't last long anyway, and it would suck to suddenly change from a mouse to full-size me smack in the middle of the initiation.

No, I needed to come up with something simple. Something I could maintain for at least a couple of hours. Lark had said it was easiest to create a glamour when you were just changing the color or outside look of something rather than trying to change the size or shape.

I racked my brain. I needed to be at that ceremony. I still had a couple of years before I was expected to go through my own initiation ceremony, but I hated the idea of going through this whole training process with no idea what was waiting for me on the other side. I mean, if you wanted to join a country club, they at least let you go on a tour of the place first. Not that I'd ever been to a country club, but they probably all allowed tours before you plunked down your money to become a member.

Why wouldn't the Order of Shadows let us see behind the curtain, then? What could they possibly be hiding?

I thought about the demon tattoo on my back. Brooke was the one in charge of giving those tattoos to the new recruits, and I was willing to bet money she was told to tell every one of us that the tattoo was no big deal. As long as she got us to agree with it, that was all that mattered. Once the tattoo was complete, there was no turning back.

I didn't ever want to be caught in that situation again.

I stared down at my hand. What if I could change the color of my skin? I could make my entire body and my clothes to be as black a midnight. I could hide in the shadows and follow them to the ritual site.

Then, I had an even better idea.

I held my hand out in front of my face and concentrated all of my energy into making it the color of nothing. The color of air.

Slowly, my hand disappeared. I smiled. I had just found my way in.

Brooke's eighteenth birthday party was set to be the party of the year. A band. A giant ferris wheel. Stands set up with typical fair games like ring toss and whack-a-mole. There were even rumors of fire dancers. After the way the last party I attended sort of went up in flames and I almost died, I wasn't terribly excited about the idea of yet another party, but of course I had to go. Everyone on the team was going.

I studied my reflection in the mirror one last time. I had used magic to straighten my normally wavy blonde hair and it fell straight down my back in long silky layers. I didn't want to do anything too taxing since I knew I'd need all my power for the ceremony. On the other hand, straightening my hair kept me connected to the power. It fed me.

I wore a new pair of skinny jeans I'd picked up at the thrift store with my black boots over the top, a black long sleeve shirt and a white faux fur vest I'd borrowed from Lark. I was surprised at how much I looked like my new friends. Being a part of the cheerleading squad had really changed me in such a short period of time.

With a somewhat nervous sigh, I grabbed my purse and headed out. Drake picked me up as usual. He looked amazing in his dark jeans and white button-up dress shirt. Very cool and casual. Had I judged him too harshly? Maybe I should stop keeping him at arm's length and give him a shot at being a real boyfriend for a change.

“You ready for a real party?” he asked when I got in the car.

“Sure. What makes this one real as opposed to other parties?”

“Because this is all-out,” he said, pulling onto the highway. “Brooke's parents are always trying to top themselves and believe me, when Brooke's older sister turned eighteen, they had the party of the century. People still talk about how wild and outrageous that party was, and that was what? Six years ago? I'm expecting nothing but amazing tonight.”

“Wow, what do people say about the last party? Did you go?”

“No,” he said. “I was like twelve. But people talked about how amazing the food was. Oh and they had this circus theme with animals in cages and circus acts going on in different tents. It was wild. I'm dying to see what they did with a fair theme.”

“You seem pretty excited about it.”

“Hell yeah. Aren't you?”

“I guess.”

“You guess? After everything we've been through already this year, I'm ready to just have a good time. No drama. Just plain old fashioned fun.”

I relaxed as he squeezed my leg and smiled. It would definitely be nice to have a night with no drama. Drake pushed the button to open his sunroof, then stuck his hand through and yelled, “Woohooo!”

I laughed. “You dork.”

“Proud of it,” he said.

When we pulled up to the party, an actual valet in a black vest and tie took the keys and parked the car for us. Even from out front we could hear the blazing music in the backyard. Brooke's family lived pretty far outside of town on a huge farm. At least they wouldn't have to worry about upsetting any neighbors with the noise. There wasn't a house within a mile from here.

When we walked through the gate to the backyard, a guy in jeans and a red cowboy shirt asked if he could get us something to drink. I ordered a diet coke. Drake ordered a beer.

I laughed and hit him in the ribs with my elbow. “They aren't going to bring you a beer, you dork. You're underage.”

“It's a private party,” Drake said. “No one cares if we drink as long as we don't drive home or damage anybody's property.”

“You're kidding me.” I looked to the waiter to see if he would disagree, but instead he wrote down the order and walked away to go get the drinks.

“Your next drink should definitely be something fruity like a Cosmo or something.”

“There's Brooke,” I said. I didn't want to get pressured into drinking tonight so I changed the subject. I needed all my senses to pull of that glamour later.

I pointed over toward the stage. Brooke was standing there with Foster and a few other guys from the football team. She looked amazing in tight black leather pants, a red strapless corset and black and white cowboy boots. Very un-Brooke. She was usually little miss conservative when it came to clothing.

“Let's go over and wish her happy birthday,” he said.

We walked over and Brooke gave me a huge hug. “I'm so glad you're here!”

She practically squealed in my ear. I couldn't tell if she was drunk or just high on being the center of attention, but she was definitely acting different. She was usually so reserved.

“Happy Birthday, Brooke,” I said. “You look unreal.”

“Thanks,” she said. “I figured tonight was a night to just let loose and go wild.”

“I like the sound of that,” Foster said, kissing her neck.

I was still holding her present in my hands. It was a new Coach purse that cost over two hundred dollars. Drake's mom had picked it out and put both mine and Drake's names on the card. “Where can we put these?”

“Oh, gosh.” She looked around. “I think they set up a gift table over by the face painting,” she said.

“We just got here, but so far it looks amazing,” I said. “This is such a cool theme.”

“My parents totally outdid themselves tonight.”

“I know, I can't decide what to do first.”

“Dance with me later?”

“Sure, I said. Of course.”

“Okay, y’all have fun, I'm gonna go say hi to a group of Mom's friends who just got here.” She leaned over and actually kissed me on the cheek. Definitely not typical Brooke. I smelled alcohol on her breath and figured she'd been drinking for quite a while before the party got started.

“So, what do you want to do first?” Drake asked. He took my hand in his and gave me a squeeze.

I looked around. The ferris wheel was all the way toward the far side of the yard, and it looked like there were a few other fair-type rides. “Let's go over there and ride some of the rides.”

We got several rides in before dinner. Brooke's parents had a huge backyard and there was a large tent set up on one side of the house. Dinner was served buffet style and included fair foods like pizza, corn dogs, fried chicken, elephant ears and corn on the cob. The area was decorated with hay bales and the tables were covered with red and white checkered tablecloths. It was amazing how authentic it looked. I felt like we were really at the State Fair they threw every fall in Perry. On top of each table was a giant sparkler that never stopped shooting sparks of changing colors.

Drake was impressed. “Wow, those things are cool.” He pointed to the sparklers with his fork. “How do you think they get it to do that? Normally, the only kind of sparklers I ever used as a kid would fizzle out after thirty seconds or so. But these are just infini-sparklers.”

“I have no idea,” I said. I wasn't sure how much Drake knew about the Order of Shadows – or even if any of the men in town knew about its existence and the magic involved – so I didn't mention the fact that Brooke's mom was a witch who could probably turn him into a sparkler if she wanted to. “It must have been crazy expensive though.”

Money was a language Drake understood perfectly. “I'm sure. It's neat. My parents always throw this huge fourth of July bonfire party down on St. Simons Island on the beach. We'll have to get some of these for that party next year.”

I bit into my corn dog and searched for Brooke in the crowd. She was seated up at the head table on the stage. Someone had put a sparkling tiara on her head and she was laughing at something Foster said in her ear. All of her nervousness from the other day seemed gone and she looked genuinely happy. I wondered if someone had finally explained the ceremony to her or if she had just put it out of her mind for the party. One way or another, I knew that everything would change for her tonight.

Together, Drake and I rode all of the rides several times, shared some cotton candy, watched the band perform, and looked at all of the game booths. Some of the games even had stuffed animals and prizes, just like at the fair. Drake tried to win a giant teddy bear with a red bow around his neck, but couldn't ever put the ball in the basket three times in a row.

“I don't get it,” he said. He sounded frustrated. “I can throw a damn football forty yards down the field perfectly on target, but I can't sink a few lousy hoops. That game is ridiculous.”

“Maybe it's because you aren't wearing your lucky sneakers,” I joked.

Drake didn't get it. “What?”

“Never mind, “I said. It gave me a thought though. Wasn't it possible that Drake's ability on the field wasn't entirely natural?

“This game sucks,” he said.

“It doesn't matter,” I said. “Who cares? Besides, it's not like I really want to carry a giant teddy bear for the rest of the night.”

“That's not the point.” He raised his voice loud enough to make some people near us turn and stare. “The freakin' game's gotta be rigged or something.”

“Don't overreact,” I said. I was getting annoyed with his tone. So far, we'd been having a good time, but I was starting to realize that it was always all about Drake. He didn't even really care if I wanted the stupid bear or not. All he cared about was winning. “It's not a big deal. Let's play a different game.”

“I need another beer,” he said. He led me toward the bar that was set up near the stage where the band was playing.

I thought he'd had more than enough beer. He was supposed to be driving me home in a few hours. But I had a feeling if I mentioned his drinking right now, he would flip out on me. Instead, I kept my mouth shut.

Luckily, we ran into Lark and Allison near the dance floor.

“Hey!” Lark ran up and gave me a hug. “I feel like I haven't seen you all night. Are you having fun? Isn't this party to die for?”

I nodded. “It's great.”

“Allison and I were thinking about going to get our faces painted. You want to come?”

I looked to Drake. “Do you mind?”

“Nah,” he said, taking a swig of his beer. “I'm gonna see if I can find Foster. I'll catch up with you later.”

To be honest, I was relieved to see him go. The more I got to know Drake, the less infatuated I became. My mind kept turning to Jackson Hunt and his piercing green eyes. I kept wondering what he was doing tonight. Maybe he was with Morgyn. And what was her deal anyway?

“Gosh, don't look so serious, Harper,” Allison said. “This is a party remember?”

I smiled and shook my head, trying to shake away my thoughts. Yes, this was a party and we were supposed to be having the time of our lives. “That cotton candy upset my stomach,” I lied. “But I'm sure I'll be okay in a few.”

“Aww,” Lark said. She put her arm around me and stuck out her bottom lip. “That sucks. Can I get you anything?”

“No,” I said. “I'll be fine. Let's just find something fun to take my mind off of it.”

Once we got to the face painters, I chose a cluster of hearts for my right cheek in bright blues, purples and pinks. The girl even added some glitter. I felt kind of like a kid again.

“Do you think Brooke's having a good time?” I asked. I was standing around watching the face painter put a large blue butterfly on Lark's cheek.

Allison rolled her eyes. “Are you kidding me? She's the center of attention on a night where almost everyone in school came out to celebrate her birthday. Look at this place. There's got to be almost five hundred people here.”

Allison was right. There was a huge turnout and everyone seemed to be having a great time. People would be talking about this party for ages. But I hated that I hadn't been able to keep my eye on Brooke like I wanted.

I had spent a lot of time that week thinking about the ritual and where they might perform it. Lark had said the ceremony was performed at Shadowford. Underground.

My plan was to head home before my one o'clock curfew, pretend to go to bed, then sneak out into the garden to wait for the members of the Order to arrive. As long as I could follow them, I knew I wouldn't miss anything.

I spotted Brooke dancing near the stage, and I pointed her out to the others. “We've got to go join her,” I said.

“Oh my God, I love this song, too,” Lark said.

We ran out onto the dance floor and Brooke screamed with excitement.

“Are you having fun?” she yelled.

“Yes, this is awesome,” Lark said.

We all danced together for what seemed like hours. It was great to just let loose and stop worrying so much. I closed my eyes and let my body move to the music. When the lead singer announced that it was time for a very special midnight surprise, I was disappointed to have the night come to an end.

“This is it!” Brooke said. She took my hand and told us to follow her so we could get the best seats. She led us to a spot in the grass beside the pool. We laid down together like four little matchsticks, side by side on the grass. “Watch the sky.”

Seconds later, the sky erupted in color. Fireworks! It had been years since I'd seen a live fireworks show. I stared up at the sky in complete awe. It was so beautiful! Pink, green, blue, purple, every color you could imagine blossomed in the sky like flowers made of light.

I turned to Brooke, expecting to see pure joy on her face. Instead, she was crying.

“What's wrong? This is amazing. Why are you upset?”

She discreetly wiped away a tear that had gathered on her long lashes. “Tears of joy,” she said. She turned her face toward me and I could see the fear in her eyes.

I gripped her hand and gave it a squeeze. “Bullshit. What's wrong?”

“I'm scared,” she whispered.

Then I understood. “About the initiation? It's tonight isn't it? After the party?”

“There were so many things I wanted out of life.” She looked back up at the sky. Each time a new color burst forth, it lit up the angles of her face and I could see the glassy tears hovering in her eyes.

“You can still have all those things,” I said. “This isn't a death, Brooke, it's a new beginning.”

She shook her head slightly and sniffed. “Yes, it's a beginning. But it's also the end.” She got quiet and watched the fireworks. After a minute, she continued. “Did you know I used to want to be a veterinarian?”

I didn't. It was one of the last career ambitions I would have thought cool, classy Brooke would be interested in. I couldn't picture her with her hands dirty.

“This huge backyard used to be a pasture. We had horses and I loved them so much. I used to ride them every day. I even loved mucking out the stalls. The smell was god-awful and I got so dirty. I loved every second of it.”

“So what happened?”

“I was chosen for the cheerleading squad.”

She didn't offer any further explanation that that, but I think I sort of got it. She'd been picked at the end of her eighth grade year. Much younger than when I came into the group. And getting onto the squad changed you. I fiddled with the zipper on my vest.

“My parents sold the horses that fall of my first year on the squad. I didn't have time for them anymore with my studies and my magic. And you know what? I barely even missed them. I hardly noticed they were gone. I thought that being a cheerleader was every thing in the world. I mean, I grew up watching my mother and sisters do magic. I knew it was what everyone expected of me. Plus, at the time, it was all so secretive. I wanted to know what it was really all about, and the only way to find out was to join.”

I nodded. I knew exactly what she was talking about.

“But lately, I've been thinking about those horses. I miss being close to animals. We have our kitty, and I love her, but I always thought someday I'd be able to pursue helping animals and being around them all the time.”

“Why do you think that's changed?” I turned my body to her and propped my head up on my palm. “You can still do all those things. You're going to college next fall and you can study whatever you want.”

Brooke turned to me then and I read both grief and pain in her eyes. She opened her mouth as if to tell me something important, then changed her mind. She looked back up at the sky.

“Brooke? It's going to be okay.”

She gave my hand another squeeze and we watched the rest of her birthday fireworks in silence, our arms linked tight.