Ink Reunited (8 page)

They played with the ice
cream, taking turns licking and tasting until they were full. He found the
small of her back the best place for a scoop and would have to make sure he let
Rafe know that for later.

“I’m all sticky,” Sassy said
as they both panted. Neither of them had come and their ongoing foreplay made
them both hot as hell.

“I’m going to grab a condom
and then we’ll make sure you don’t get too much stickier.”

He chuckled as he stood up.
She wrinkled her nose and shook her head. “That was crude, but I liked it.”

As he walked back to her, he
slid the condom over his length, liking the way her gaze tracked the movement.
In fact, she seemed to like watching him a lot.

“Get up, face the mirror on
the dresser, and grip the edge,” he ordered.

She grinned and did as she was
told. He came up from behind her and placed his hands near hers so he could get
a good grip but not crush her.

“Ready, my darling?” he
whispered, then kissed the small spot behind her ear. She shivered in his hold
and he rocked against her so his dick slid between her cheeks.

She bent for him slightly and
he sank into her heat. He moved his hands so he could grip her hips and then
pulled back. Their gazes met in the reflection and he grinned back at her.

“Ready, Ian. I’m ready for
anything.”

God, he hoped so, but those
doubts weren’t meant for then.

Their gazes in the mirror
never wavered as he pumped into her. Their breathing synchronized, and he
increased the pace. His balls tightened and the base of his spine tingled and
he knew he was about to come.

He reached up and cupped her
breast. She licked her lips and then they came together, their moans echoing in
the room as he filled the condom. He couldn’t wait to fill her up when he was
bare, but that was for later.

Right now he had the woman he
loved in his arms, his cock fully inside her, and her body pressed against his.
He’d take that for now and pray that one day it would be more, that she
wouldn’t leave him. That she would trust him to do the same.

He shook of the melancholy
thoughts and kissed her softly. “Mine,” he whispered.

“Yours and mine too,” she panted
back.

“Yours, Sassy. Always yours.”

“So Sassy’s working tonight?” Rafe
asked though he thought he already knew the answer considering she wasn’t in
the loft with him and Ian.

Ian sat on the couch next to
him, his tie undone and looking mighty sexy and disheveled. He took a swig of
his beer and leaned his head back. “She closes tonight with Shep who is then
taking her to his place so his girl, Shea, and Sassy can have a girls’ night.
His cousin, Austin, is in town again and they are going out so the girls can
have some time alone.”

“That’s right,” Rafe said then
took a sip of his own beer. “He invited us along too, right?”

“Yeah, but I declined for us
since I know we’ve both been working our asses off trying to acclimate to the
move.”

He closed his eyes, his head
aching like a bitch after the day he’d had. His dad still ran the shop in New
Orleans even though Rafe bought him out years ago since Rafe owned the other
two in the franchise he’d made. The blend of two dominant men in one workspace
wasn’t working out as well as he’d hoped.

He’d run from Sassy and
Ian—only to end up living near Ian for a decade anyway. He’d come back to New
Orleans so he would quit running from his problems. When he’d been gone, he
made sure he kept distant from his family because he’d shamed them.

Or at least he thought he had.

Damn. His parents were way
more tolerant and accepting than he’d given them credit for. That, in itself,
would have shamed him more for his lack of faith, but Sassy hadn’t let him pile
it on.

After all, they’d chosen to
move on and find their own futures. However, working with his father was
turning into a bitch all on its own. His old man didn’t have the same visions
as Rafe did, and while Rafe accepted his dad would never change, some things in
life had to.

He’d work it out or open up a
new shop as part of the chain if he had to. No matter what he wouldn’t run away
like he had before. He’d been young and stupid then.

He was older now and hoped to
God not as stupid.

There was one dominant man in
his life, at least, and things seemed to be running smoothly on that front.

He hoped.

He leaned over and rested his
head on Ian’s shoulder. Ian shifted so he could wrap his arm around Rafe
comfortably. He took a deep breath and inhaled the sandalwood scent that was
so…Ian.

 “What was your plan for the
night then?” Rafe asked, his voice a little drowsy. It was nice, sitting on the
couch with the man he loved wrapped around him. They were just sitting there
staring at nothing and he felt content. From the way Ian’s body had relaxed
around Rafe’s, the other man was comfortable as well.

Ian ran a finger down Rafe’s
shoulder but didn’t move otherwise. The tension in the room rose, but it was a
heady one.

“I hadn’t thought of anything
beyond just staying at home. I’m too damn tired to go out there and pretend to
party with the twenty somethings.”

Rafe grinned. Ian had always
been something of a homebody and older than his years when it came to being
with people, but he wasn’t going to bring that up. Not when they were getting
along and just enjoying the evening.

They sat there in silence for
another ten minutes or so until Ian shifted and Rafe sat up straighter. Ian let
out a breath and then put his forearms on his thighs, his head bowed.

Rafe frowned and ran a hand up
and down Ian’s back. “What’s wrong?”

“What are we doing?”

Four words.

Just four words and Rafe felt
like the wind had been knocked out of him. He blinked, unsure of what to say.
From the tone of Ian’s voice, the set of his shoulders, Rafe knew they weren’t
talking about what they would do for dinner.

No, this was the conversation
Rafe had been afraid to have…even though he thought they’d had it already.

Damn it. Now he was mad. “What
the hell do you mean, Ian?”

Ian turned to him, his eyes
wide. “Why are you angry? I wanted to know the next step so I wouldn’t be
behind.” Ian stood, staggering back. “Fuck, Rafe. You thought I was going to
leave again? You really fucking thought that after all of this, everything I’ve
said and done, that I’d leave?”

Rafe stood so they were nose
to nose. “You fucking left before!”

Pain arched through Ian’s eyes
before he shut it down. “Fuck you, Rafe. I thought we were past that. Have I
given you any cause to think I haven’t been here?”

Rafe narrowed his eyes but
didn’t say anything. He couldn’t come up with a damn thing and that bothered
him more than he wanted to say. His own insecurities were biting him in the
ass.

“Ian—”

His lover held up his hand.
“No, let me talk. I know I don’t laugh and smile as much as you and Sassy do. I
know I’m the one on the sidelines who just seems to be…there. But I like it
that way, Rafe. I like watching the two of you joke around and smile at the
oddest things. I like knowing that I’m there, even if I don’t have to be
part
of everything at all times.”

Jesus, Rafe was an ass. “Ian,
you’re always part of it. I know you’re here. God, I’m so fucking sorry. I
don’t know what’s wrong with me.” And now he was sounding like a teenage girl.
Or boy at this point for that matter.

Ian lifted his lips in a small
smile before shaking his head. “I’m not going anywhere, Rafe. God, I made so
many mistakes before and we all know it. I was so afraid of what my parents
would think about me not only loving a man, but loving that man
and
a
woman at the same time. I was so fucking stupid for not doing what was inside
my heart rather than doing what everyone else expected of me.”

Rafe didn’t move, didn’t
speak, knowing this was important for Ian…and them.

Ian cupped Rafe’s face, his
strong hands an anchor when Rafe felt as if he were drifting, not knowing what
was coming next.

“You and Sassy are my
everything. You were before and I didn’t understand what that meant. I’m in
this for the long haul, Rafe. But I need to know what that long haul is. We’re
fucking crazy to just show up at Midnight Ink and want to start a whole life
with Sassy without even talking about it with her first, but that’s what we
did. We made the big moment rather than waiting for something to happen.”

Rafe turned his head to kiss
Ian’s palm. “I know. In retrospect, we could have gone about it a bit
differently.”

Ian grinned. “You don’t say.
It’s been two months since we came back and tried to make this work and I’m not
going anywhere. You’ve got to believe that or everything I’m doing isn’t
enough, Rafe.”

“Jesus, I’m a fucking
asshole.”

Ian grinned. “Yeah, you are,
but I love you.”

“I love you too, Ian.”

Ian lowered his head and
captured his lips in a fierce kiss. When he pulled away he leaned his forehead
against Rafe’s. “We’re taking this slow, Rafe.” He snorted. “Well, as slow as
we can since we’re all already sleeping together.”

Rafe grinned. “Well, we did
have a past, so it’s not
that
slow.”

“I’m putting everything out
there, Rafe. I’m in. I know you are, too, or you wouldn’t be so scared of what
could happen if I didn’t.”

“I know that. I do. I just had
a panic attack or some shit.”

“If you don’t trust me, it’s
gonna make it fucking hard to move on. I know I deserve it in some respects,
but I’m here. And I hope to God Sassy is too.”

Rafe closed his eyes. “We have
to give her the same benefit of the doubt we’re giving each other.”

“I know. We are. But you’ll
notice that while the two of us have said we loved each other, and Sassy as
well, she hasn’t said the words.” The pain in Ian’s eyes was too hard to take,
and Rafe kissed him softly.

“It crossed my mind.”

Ian pulled back and shook his
head. “Look at us. It’s been two fucking months of dating, the best sex of our
lives and connecting in a way that means something and we’re harping on the
fact that she hasn’t said she loves us.”

“The words matter with Sassy.”

“And that’s what hurts so
fucking much because I don’t know if she’ll ever say them. It’s so much easier
to go back to what she was doing before we came back rather than face the
trials we’re going to go through once the world finds out.”

Ian wasn’t being self-centered
with that fear. He worked in a very public arena, and people had already been
commenting that he was dating a secret woman named Sassy. It was only a matter
of time before they found out about Rafe…and who Sassy was. They weren’t hiding
it in fear that they’d hurt each other. In doing so though, they’d allowed a
new set of problems to creep up. They would deal with those problems, and Rafe
knew it would be worth it.

He just prayed Sassy would
feel the same.

“I’m not going to push her to
say anything she doesn’t mean…or if she does mean it, but isn’t ready to admit
to us, or even herself,” Ian said.

“What do you want out of
this?” Rafe asked. He knew what he wanted—the whole damn thing, vows, babies,
and a way for the three of them to work and live together. The world could fuck
itself for its views on what was right or wrong. They weren’t hurting anyone
with what they had, and everyone else could just get over it.

Easier said than done, but if Rafe’s
family was fine with it, that was their greatest hurdle. Ian could give a
flying fuck about his parents, Sassy the same. Her true family at Midnight Ink
was fine with ménages considering there was a triad at the shop already.

Ian ran his thumb over Rafe’s
cheek. “I want everything, Rafe. I want it all. Just like you. It doesn’t mean
I deserve it, but I want it. I don’t know how it will work beyond what we can
do as the three of us work together, but we will find a way.”

“In terms of the three of us,
it’s just more communication if you think about it.”

Ian rolled his eyes. “Yeah,
we’re not the greatest at that.”

“Plus more sex since there are
three of us.”

Ian threw his head back and
laughed—one of the sexiest things ever in Rafe’s opinion. “There is that. And
we’re pretty fucking great at it.”

Ian pulled him close and Rafe
rested his head on his shoulder. They stood there for a while in silence, their
bodies swaying to a beat only they could hear.

“We’re going to be okay,” Ian
whispered.

Rafe closed his eyes and
squeezed Ian’s waist. “Yeah. Yeah, we will.”

The only thing they had no
control over right then that mattered —and no desire to
have
control
over—was Sassy. She was a force unto herself.

As much as he and Ian loved
each other, Rafe knew it wouldn’t be the same without Sassy. She was the one who
held them together and made their lives complete.

She hadn’t left, but was she fully
committed?

He didn’t know, but he’d give
her time. He and Ian both would.

She was their center.

They had to make sure she knew
it.

“So is it different being with
two guys rather than just one?” Shea’s eyes widened and she slapped her hand
over her mouth, shaking her head. “I can’t believe I just asked that,” she
mumbled behind her hand.

Sassy ran her hand through her
hair, her bangles jiggling as she tried to hold back her laughter at the
question.

“Oh honey, you’re family. You
can ask those questions,” Sassy teased.

Shep, the love of Shea’s life
and one of Sassy’s best friends, came up behind Shea and put his hand on her
shoulders. “Sassy, love, if she’s family, maybe you shouldn’t be talking about
sex. And Shea, baby, I’m all the man you need.”

Shea blushed hard and leaned
into him. “You’re more than I can handle most days, Shep, but I like trying to
handle you just fine.”

Sassy grinned as Shep pulled
Shea into a steamy kiss then left her mussed, blushing, and looking sexy as
hell. There was just something hot and sweet about looking at a couple—or
triad—in love and knowing that there might be something for her as well.

Oh, she wasn’t ready to come
out and say that she’d found her bliss, but she was definitely on the right
track.

She purposely kept her
feelings from Ian and Rafe, after all they’d only been reunited for a couple
months. They still had time to find their rhythm and figure out how each piece
of their particular puzzle would fit together. However, that didn’t mean she
hadn’t been thinking about it.

God, some days it felt like it
was the
only
thing she thought about.

Things were going well though.
Great even. She had moments with each of her men and moments with both of them
at the same time. It wasn’t lost on her that she constantly thought of Ian and
Rafe as
her
men.

That’s what they were.

They were hers as much as she
was theirs.

Shep went back to his notepad,
working on artwork for a design for Shea, leaving her and Sassy to talk about
what they loved best.

Their men.

Of course, Sassy had to answer
the phones and do all of the other thirty-thousand things that went with being
the Midnight Ink receptionist, but today was a rather slow day thankfully. It
was mostly just the artists working on upcoming projects with only two clients
in chairs getting inked. The buzz of the needle was a gentle hum, sliding up
and down Sassy’s spine.

Oh yeah, it was totally time
to get new ink.

Maybe she’d get that ink Rafe
and Ian had wanted when they’d first come in to the shop a couple months ago.
It was hard to believe it had only been two months since they’d walked in and
scared the shit out of her. God, she loved them, but she was waiting to tell
them.

Something was holding her
back, she didn’t know what, but she wasn’t ready to let them know.

“What are you thinking about
that’s giving you that serious face?” Shea asked, pulling Sassy out of her
thoughts of love and her men.

Sassy shook her head and
smiled. There was no use talking about things she couldn’t even fully form in
her mind. She’d rather talk about the good things—like sex and the fact that
Shep and Shea would be getting married soon.

Well, by soon, she meant
within the next year, but that was still pretty freaking cool.

“So, are you excited about
your new ink?” Sassy asked, changing the subject. Shea raised a brow but didn’t
point it out.

“I just finished my first
piece with Shep, but he’s planning number two. I think it’ll be a while before
I get to it though. I want to make sure I don’t go crazy and get twelve tats in
twelve months.”

Sassy tilted her head. “You
know, if they were small ones, that could be a good promotion.”

Shea rolled her eyes. “Oh God,
look what I started.”

Sassy grinned and turned to
the front desk so she could write down that idea. Someone had left the morning
paper on top of her legal pad and as she moved it out of the way, something
caught her eye.

“The Bordeaux Whore Is Back
In Town. What Does Daddy Have To Say About That?”

Sassy blinked as the buzzing
in her ears grew louder and louder. She opened her mouth to speak but nothing
came out. She put her finger on the column on the society pages and licked her
lips.

“Sassy? What is it? Oh God,
you’re pale. Are you sick? Shep!”

She heard Shea calling out but
it was from somewhere far away and moving even farther away.

They’d found out.

Someone had figured out who
she was and how she was connected to Ian. She glanced at the words,
whore
,
sodimist
, and
threesome
, standing out and making her want to
vomit.

They’d found out about Rafe
too.

Strong hands pulled her around
and she looked into Shep’s eyes, unseeing.

“Sassy? What’s wrong, honey?
Talk to me. Austin, get her some water.”

Sassy had forgotten Shep’s
cousin Austin was back in town. She’d have to make sure she teased him about
his ink like she always did. That was, if she could ever think again…or face
these people again.

Oh God, what would they do
when they found out she’d lied to them all this time?

“Oh my God, Sassy,” Shea
gasped beside her and Sassy closed her eyes.

Damn it. She’d seen the
article.

“Oh honey, that stupid bitch
Vivian is such a fucking asshole when she writes in the gossip column. They put
me and Shep in there when we were first dating because of my dad, but it blew
over.”

Sassy felt Shea’s hands on her
back but she couldn’t speak. She could only think of what she needed to do and
who she’d have to protect. That was her job.

She was
The
Sassy.

She’d have to give it all up
to make sure Rafe’s family, Ian’s people, her crew, all of them, would be okay.

There was no other choice open
to her.

Because no matter how
scandalous it was for Shea, the golden girl, to date an inked tattoo artist, it
was nothing like being the lost Bordeaux princess who found herself in a
threesome with one of the most eligible men in the United States and another
man with no breeding according to her parents’ society circles.

That’s what they’d tear them
down to. It didn’t matter that she loved Ian and Rafe or that they were both
more than a label. Nothing mattered in the world where she’d grown up, that same
world she still fought so hard to leave behind.

The public face was the only
thing that mattered in that world.

Living the ultimate sin in
their eyes would only harm Ian and Rafe.

She couldn’t do that.

No matter what she thought of
herself, she wouldn’t hurt the men she loved.

Damn it.

Tears threatened, but she
fought them back. She wouldn’t break down in front of her friends—the family
she’d made with ties she hoped to God were stronger than blood.

“Shit, Sassy, there’s a crew
out here with a camera saying they want to talk to you,” Austin said from
behind her and Sassy held back a shudder. “I locked the doors. This is private
property and they can go fuck themselves.”

“I need to get out of here,”
she whispered, her voice broken.

Her
everything
broken.

Shep ran a hand through her
hair, but she barely felt it.

Barely felt anything.

“Okay, honey, we’ll get you
out of here.”

She shook her head and pulled
away. She could feel the stares of everyone in the room. People she loved
walking toward her, trying to help, but she couldn’t do it, couldn’t take it.

“I need to be alone. I’m going
to go out the back, but I don’t have my car.”

Austin threw his keys at her
and she caught them without thinking. “It’s my rental. Take it. I can hitch a
ride with Shep, easy.”

“Austin, I don’t think she
should be driving right now,” Shea admonished.

“I think she’s stronger than
any of us. If she needs to get the fuck away, we need to let her,” Austin
countered.

God, even a man she’d only
known for a couple months thought she was stronger than she really was. She
hoped she could live up to it because she was about to do something that would
take everything out of her.

“Sassy,” Shep snapped and she
blinked out of whatever daze she was in. “Get it together. I know you can do
this. You need to leave? Okay, we can do that for you. But you don’t get to
drive out there and hurt yourself because you’re locked in your head. Get me?”

She nodded, grateful for her
family. “I’m going to be okay,” she lied.

She’d never be okay with what
she had to do, but she’d do it anyway. Strength didn’t come from the easy choices,
but from the very difficult ones that she was being forced to make now.

“We’ll hold the fort,” Shep
said. “Then you can tell us what happened. We’re not going to pry.”

She kissed him on the cheek
then ran out the back door. She couldn’t see any reporters around, but she
didn’t trust them not to ambush her. She put her brain on autopilot as she
drove to Rafe’s garage. Ian would be there too. It was his day off, and he was
helping out Rafe’s family and forming those connections she craved. They were
supposed to go out for lunch, the three of them, in another hour and then Ian
would spend the afternoon at Midnight getting to know her family.

At least that had been the
plan.

Not anymore.

A few spiteful words in a newspaper
gossip column had ruined that.

She pulled into the garage and
shut off the engine. The tears still hadn’t fallen. It was as if she were
frozen in time, watching everyone around her moving around like nothing had
happened. Like her world hadn’t just shattered into a million tiny pieces and
would never be whole again.

“Sassy? Are we late?” Rafe
asked, a smile on his face. He had grease stains on his coveralls and looked
strong enough that he could hold her with his will alone.

It wasn’t enough.

“Baby?” Ian came out from the
other room, dressed in jeans and a t-shirt making him look more casual than
she’d ever seen him. He looked like he
fit
in the family.

Something she’d never be part
of.

“What’s wrong?” Rafe asked as
he came up to her.

She took a step back when he
tried to reach for her. The shock and pain on his face was like a blow to the
chest, but this was how it needed to be.

“Can we find a private place
to talk?” She could see Rafe’s father walking into the garage and she couldn’t
face him, not when she was going to disappoint him and his family again.

God, she’d done this before
but then it had been to protect her own heart.

No, it was to protect them.

There was a difference.

There had to be.

“Yeah, we can go to the back,”
Rafe said, the fear in his voice shooting straight through her.

Funny, she’d thought she’d be
numb by now.

She followed them both and
stood between them, knowing this would be the last time she’d do so.

“Have you seen the papers?”
she asked, her voice devoid of emotion. If she broke down then, she’d never
stop and wouldn’t be able to get it out.

“Not yet,” Ian said. “I read
the front headlines, but haven’t looked at the rest. What is this, Sassy?”

She shook her head. “Look at
the gossip column when you get a chance, or don’t. They know.”

Rafe blinked. “Who knows?”

“Everyone. They all know. They
know the Bordeaux whore is in a threesome and the lost princess is a shame to
her family.”

Ian’s face grew stormy. “What?
What name did you just use?”

She shook her head. “That’s
not important. You’ll read all about it. What they wrote? It’s not true. We
know that, but it doesn’t matter. What does matter is that we’re hurting people
being together. Ian, you’ll lose so much by doing this. You too, Rafe. Your
family might agree with what we’re doing but will they once they’re hounded by
my past and the future we thought to make?”

“Fuck the world, Sass,” Rafe
barked. “We’ve been through this before. We’re not losing you.”

She shook her head. “We’ve
never done this before. I’ve spent my life trying to find out who I am, and if
I stay and hurt the people I love because I wanted something I can’t have, then
I’ve lost myself as well.”

“Nothing we are is
wrong
,”
Ian whispered.

She closed her eyes tight to
keep the tears at bay. “I know that. I
know
. We’ve never been taboo in
my head. I’ve never thought anything was wrong with loving two men. That isn’t
it. It’s the fact that others would be hurt because of what I want. That’s what
kills me. That’s the difference. If I could love both of you and never have it
harm the people we love too, then I’d leap at the chance. But I can’t be
selfish.”   

“Stopping this now isn’t the
answer,” Rafe said, his voice hard.

“Stopping this now might make
me a coward, but it saves the people around us. I was happy before you came
back and maybe, just maybe, I might find that again. If I don’t? Then I never
deserved it in the first place.”

The first tear fell and she
knew she was running out of time. “I love both of you. Please know that, but I
can’t go on living something that will only hurt us all in the future.”

Neither man spoke, their faces
hard, and she nodded.

There.

She’d done it.

She’d broken it all.

Again.

She turned on her heel, got in
Austin’s rental, and drove off.

The tears fell in earnest now,
but she drove on, not knowing where she was going. Home would be too much, too
much Rafe, too much Ian.

For as much as others had
claimed she was strong, she knew it was a lie.

No matter how strong she
acted, no matter what she did to help the others in her life, she was weak.
The
Sassy wasn’t destined for a happy ending.