INK: Abstraction (8 page)

“Wow, somebody
missed me.” I’ve left him breathless and surprised.

“Of course I
did.” I smile coyly. “Trust me, if I could control when I
got to see you, I would be here all the time.”

“Ah, so you’re
saying you like me?”

“Guilty.”
My hands slink around his neck and I pull him in again for a kiss. I
need more of him to touch me. Without my lips leaving his I turn
completely around and tug the covers away that have settled between
us. His arms wrap tighter around me as we kiss and our flesh comes
into contact. Feeling his warmth against me is soothing; it comforts
me and makes me feel safe. His growing hard-on against my leg gets me
going, tells me that he wants me just as much as I want him. I reach
down and rub along him and he lets out a breathy groan. “Oh,
God I’ve
really
missed you.”

Gabriel presses harder
against me and I run my teeth down his neck, kissing and nibbling the
whole way down to his solid chest. “I want you; I need you
in
me now,” I demand.

He kisses along my
neck, pulling the covers back. “Yes ma’am.”

Gabriel’s eyes
widen and fill with horror when he looks at me. In that moment I’m
feeling a strange uncertainty. I’ve never had anyone react to
seeing me naked like this before and it’s a little unsettling.
His mouth stays open after he sucks in a sharp breath. “What
happened?”

The white bed sheets
are soaked with blood, my blood. There are bleeding cuts covering my
body. My breathing becomes erratic and I feel like I’m not
getting any air at all. Gabriel is frozen in terror looking at me. I
shake my head, completely confused.

“
This is what
I saved you from, my love.
” The Specter’s voice rides
on the foul stench filling the room. Helpless, I look to Gabriel,
hoping he heard it too. Slowly he nods to confirm it wasn’t
just me.

We both look around the
room to find the Specter. We can’t see him, but we can smell
and hear him. Gabriel instinctively pulls me closer and covers me
with the blankets. “Leave,” Gabriel commands.

A rancid laugh travels
in psychedelic waves through the air. Bile rises to the back of my
throat as I cower in Gabriel’s arms, quaking with fear.

The Specter appears
next to the bed. “Gabriel, really? I think we both know that
you don’t make demands of
me
.”

Gabriel pulls me into
him, then lifts me over him to put more distance between me and the
Specter. The Specter laughs boisterously. He’s toying with us
and shit’s about to get real. I want to yell out, but I have no
voice. I’m terrified and feel weak. I cower behind Gabriel,
holding onto him as tight as I can. He puts his hand on mine and
whispers over his shoulder, “I have to get up, you stay here.”

My hands instinctively
grip him tighter, fearing the distance he’s about to put
between us. “No,” I squeak out.

“Babe, I need to
get him away from you.” His eyes are haunting and sincere.
“Please.”

I release him and
immediately regret it. This just isn’t going to be okay.
Gabriel gets out of the bed and starts for the Specter. He spins and
dances while fantastic tendrils of smoke move around the room at his
command. Were he not the living embodiment of evil it would be
beautiful to watch. Gabriel heads straight for the Specter, attacking
him, pushing him up against the wall.

Three black bands of
smoke wrap around Gabriel, holding his arms down to his sides.
Identical bands come up from the bed and strap me down, holding me in
place. An incredible panic rises in me, consumes me and I can’t
breathe. Involuntary screams pass over my lips. “Gabriel! Help
me.”

He looks back at me,
helpless. He’s struggling to get out of the grip of the
Specter. They are struggling and I can’t see what’s
happening. The room has become so dark with the black evil fog. I
barely see Gabriel until he falls onto the bed next to me still
struggling with the Specter.

Gabriel looks at me,
trying to fortify me, to somehow comfort me in the hopelessness. The
Specter’s voice oozes as he says, “Oh, now isn’t
this touching?” He pauses, looking from me to Gabriel. “How
about this!” His arm makes a thrusting motion and I see that
he’s shoved a knife into Gabriel’s belly.

Gabriel’s eyes go
wide and his body seizes to a stop. He tries to reach out to me but
is still bound. I’m unable to move, only scream. “Gabriel,
no.”

I struggle harder to
get free and it all feels too familiar. The Specter looks at me with
mock sympathy, then back to Gabriel. “This, Gabriel Stokes, is
checkmate.” He thrusts the knife into Gabriel again.

Gabriel looks at me and
mouths, “I’m sorry.”

I scream his name over
and over again until I hear him speaking. “Wake up, please wake
up. It will be okay.”

Screams of terror fill
the room and I feel a hand on my shoulder. “Shay, wake up.”

My instincts tell me to
fight against anyone touching me. I push back wildly until I realize
that it’s Eli’s voice I’m hearing. “Shay,
it’s okay. Shh.” He pulls my head into his chest to quiet
me.

“Eli?” My
voice is soft but questioning.

“Yeah,
Sweetybird, I’m here. I’ve got you.” He rocks me
for comfort.

“Oh God, Eli.”
I wrap my arms around him. I can’t believe he’s actually
here. He’s here, I’m here, I’m safe. When I hear
those words in my head I’m immediately alarmed. My eyes spring
open and I look around the room. Eli is on the bed holding me. McNab
is standing next to the bed trying to mask his concern. Dad is at the
end of the bed with watery eyes. My grip on Eli tightens.

Carl’s behind
McNab. “You really are safe, it’s okay.”

My brain can’t
process everything and all I can do is hold onto Eli so he can’t
slip away. Hysterical tears spill from my eyes and my body is shaking
uncontrollably.

“Shh, I’ve
got you. You’re okay.” Eli speaks in a soft tone, holding
me just as tight as I’m holding him.

Dad comes to the side
of the bed behind Eli. “Hey Doodlebug, you’re okay. We’re
all here.”

I peek around Eli’s
shoulder, looking at everyone and waiting for them to disappear, the
walls to crumble and the nightmare to return. I can’t tell the
difference between what’s real and what’s an illusion.

I want this to be real.

The tears and shaking
don’t stop for a good while. A nurse enters the room carrying a
case. “I need to replace her I.V.”

My grasp on Eli
tightens and I won’t let him move away from me. I shake my head
so everyone knows I’m not letting go.

“Sweetheart, I
need to put your I.V. back in. You need this medicine.” Her
tone is calm, yet stern.

“I’m not
leaving you,” Eli breathes into my ear. I shake my head again.
It’s all I can do with the fear that has taken me over.

“Give her a
minute,” Dad says to the nurse and moves to the other side of
the bed and sits with me. “Shayleigh, the nurse is trying to
help you. I’m going to be right here and Eli isn’t going
anywhere.”

I look up at him with
frightened eyes trying to find the truth in his words. His sad smile
touches me on a deep level. “Please, I promise I’ll be
right here. Please Shay, I don't want them to sedate you again.”

I tangle one hand in
Eli’s shirt and offer the other arm to the nurse to put the
I.V. in. I can’t stop shaking, but she’s being very
patient with me. “Mr. Baynes, can you help me hold her arm
still?”

Dad wraps his arm
around me, looping down to hold me still. In a tone like he’s
talking to a five year old he says, “I’ve got you, honey,
try to hold still.”

My eyes close in an
effort to reconcile that I’m safe, that I’m not being cut
again. That I’m with Eli, and I chant over and over in my mind,
you’re safe.

She gets the I.V. in
and tapes it up. There is sorrow in her gaze at seeing my cut and
bruised skin. I can see her pondering what must have happened to me.
With moist eyes she offers a consoling smile and puts her hand on my
leg. “You’re going to be okay.” I nod and look
away. Eye contact with her is hard. I bury myself back into Eli’s
chest.

“Are you able to
walk?” she asks.

I really don’t
know if I can. I look to Eli as if he has the answer. I shrug. She
smiles and says, “Well there’s only one way to find out.”
She wheels the I.V. stand around to the side of the bed where Eli is.
“Doctor Kendrick says that you should be okay to shower with
assistance. I just have to know that you’re sure-footed
enough.”

Her attitude is
encouraging. I look at Eli as though asking permission. He shrugs.
“Do you feel up to trying to walk?”

I nod and he stands,
ready to brace me. My feet are sore and a pain shoots up my legs when
they press against the floor. It’s not comfortable, but I can
do it.

“That’s
great,” the nurse says with a smile. She looks around the room
until her eyes land on Eli, then me. “Alright, boys, I’ll
be back in about five minutes to get her cleaned up and I’m
going to need you clear out.”

My head shakes
vehemently and I grab onto Eli. No way I’m letting him go. I
don’t even know her name. It feels like I’m trying to
climb inside Eli so he doesn’t leave me. I look her in the eye
and shake my head.

“Sweetheart, we
really need to get you cleaned up and tend to these wounds,”
she says in a sympathetic tone.

All I can think is that
I’d like a shower, but I can’t let Eli out of my sight.
Shit. Panic is rising in me and my shaking is getting worse.

“Can I talk with
you outside?” Dad says to the nurse, touching her elbow to lead
her out. Carl follows them to the hallway.

My legs give out on me
and I have to sit back on the bed. My fingers are still holding so
tight onto Eli’s shirt that I think I’ve lost blood flow.
His sapphire eyes are watery with grief at how broken I am. His pain,
the pain he’s feeling because of me, is riding on the surface.
I have to pull myself together. Eli needs me to pull it together.

“Take it easy,
sweetie.” He kisses my forehead. “You don’t have to
do anything you don’t want to do.”

A hint of a smile plays
on my lips as a thank you. McNab sits on the other side of the bed,
full of confidence. “Hey kid, we’re here for you.
Whatever you need, name it and I’ll bring it.”

I nod and press tighter
into Eli. McNab eyes Eli for a moment and mischief crosses his
expression. “We can give you a sponge bath right now.”

Eli is appalled at the
suggestion. I on the other hand find it hilarious and start to shake
with quiet laughter. “What the hell is wrong with you, McNab?
Look what you did!”

“Yeah, you’re
going to be just fine, kid. Let me know on that sponge bath,”
He says, smiling and very pleased with himself.

Eli must have thought I
was crying, until he looks down and sees that I’m laughing. My
laughter is short-lived, but I manage to keep the smile going, as
hard as it is. They need me to pull it together. Eli glares at
McNab. “Nobody’s giving her a sponge bath.”

I look up at him,
questioning. He’s getting flustered. “Well, I will. But
no way he’s going to do it.”

I huff another laugh
out and shake my head while nuzzling deeper into his chest. Eli
protectively puts his arms around me and he and McNab exchange
another look. This feels a little bit normal, far away from the
nightmare.

Dad comes back into the
room with Carl, but the nurse isn’t with him. He’s a
little taken aback when he looks at me. “Are you okay,
Doodlebug?”

I nod and try to smile.
McNab sits back in the chair next to the bed. “She lightened up
when I told her I’d give her a sponge bath.”

Carl and Dad both look
at McNab like he’s lost his mind. “What?” Dad asks.

“True story.”
McNab folds his hands behind his head and kicks back in the chair.
I’m finding this exchange amusing.

Dad inhales a breath,
unsure how to proceed. He glances in McNab’s direction a few
times as if to be sure he heard him right. Eli’s irritated and
Carl’s confused. After surveying the room, Dad starts.
“Sweetheart, I need to ask you a few questions.”

There’s no way
I’m ready to talk about any of what happened. I’m doing
my best to not think about it. I cower deeper into Eli. Dad puts his
hand on my arm and I jump a little. He has a great pain in his eyes
when he continues. “Would you feel more comfortable if it were
just us?”

I shake my head, since
I know what he’s about to ask. I’d rather he just get to
it. He nods, pulling his lips into a thin line. “Before you’re
able to get cleaned up, is there anything we need to know?”

He’s about as
subtle as a nuclear bomb. I shake my head, telling him no. He doesn’t
seem satisfied with my answer and continues. “Were you…do
we need to…” He just can’t bring himself to ask if
I was raped. I wasn’t, there’s no need for a rape kit.

“No Harry, she’s
okay,” Carl answers. We all breathe a collective sigh of relief
that we don’t need to continue to discuss it and I don’t
need an examination.

“Okay, the nurse
is going to come in and clean you up. McNab, Carl, I’m sure
she’ll appreciate it if we wait in the hall.” He eyes Eli
and I shake my head, letting him know I’m not letting go. I
wish they would just let me shower rather than having some stranger
touching me. Those words echo in my head that someone’s going
to be touching me and it sets off sheer panic. Eli looks down at me
when my body goes rigid.

The nurse comes into
the room with a basin, towels and a fresh gown. “Okay, are we
ready?”

“Actually, would
she be able to take a shower?” Carl asks.

She looks at me a
moment. “If you’re feeling up to it I don’t see why
not. We have a shower chair in there. I’ll need to stay here to
be sure you are okay.”