Read Infinite (Strange and Beautiful, Book 1) Online
Authors: Brittney Musick
When
Tegan put it that way, she made my uncertainty about my relationship status
with Jackson sound rather dumb. I knew that wasn’t her intent, though. I knew
she was just trying to make me see sense, which wasn’t always easy.
Even
so, the idea of inviting Jackson to come with us was a little intimidating. My
shyness had mostly faded over the years, but when it came to Jackson, I always
seemed to find myself feeling awkward and timid until the conversation picked
up. It felt like those initial sentences had to be carefully chosen, or I’d end
up saying something incredibly stupid and from there I would only feel stupid
and ill at ease.
It
wasn’t that Jackson made me feel dumb. In fact, he seemed to put me at ease,
which was odd because he was also the source of my anxiety. I had no idea
liking a guy could be so much work. I wondered if guys had the same sort of
anxiety around girls. If so, they seemed much better at covering it up.
After
a little more coaxing from Tegan, I finally agreed to invite Jackson. The only
problem was I had no idea where his locker was located. I usually saw him in
one general area of the school, though, so I figured that was probably the best
place to look. I knew trying to find him, invite him and make it to class on
time would be tricky.
Since
Tegan refused to let me back out of inviting Jackson, I decided I’d just have
to manage somehow. If worse came to worse I’d just be late for Spanish. I
didn’t think Mrs. Willis would care too much because she usually wasn’t as
strict as the other teachers when it came to stragglers.
After
Algebra, I sent Tegan to my locker with my books. She’d offered to take them
and get my Spanish book for me while I was talking to Jackson. Then I headed
for the hallway where I saw Jackson most often.
The
hallway was awfully crowded, even more so than the ones I usually traveled.
Even though I was a few inches taller, it didn’t seem to help in locating him.
Most of the upperclassmen—namely the guys—still had several inches of height
over me.
Worried
about the bell, I was about to give up and look for Jackson at the end of the
day when I spotted him toward the end of the hallway. I weaved my way through
the crowd. One of the perks of being small was the ability to move quickly
through tight spaces. I was just lucky I wasn’t claustrophobic; otherwise, it
might not have been so easy to maneuver through the large crowd.
Once
I’d escaped the bulk of people, I stood up straight and patted my hair down.
While volume was a seemingly impossible option, static was a whole other issue.
Satisfied my hair wasn’t a complete wreck, I headed toward Jackson, who had his
broad back to me.
I
admired the way the royal blue t-shirt he wore stretched across the expanse of
his shoulders. It was also lovely against his light skin and dark hair. It was
disgusting how gorgeous he managed to look from behind under the florescent
glow of the overhead lights.
He
was grabbing books from his locker as I reached him. Feeling brave due to
Tegan’s assurances that Jackson and I were, indeed, friends, I poked him in the
right side. “Hello, Jacks.”
He
jumped when I spoke and laughed when he turned to see me. The use of his
nickname didn’t even seem to faze him. “Didn’t anyone tell you it’s not nice to
sneak up on people?”
“Might’ve
mentioned it,” I shrugged with a smile.
He
grinned. “So, what are you doing in this neck of the woods?”
“Well,
I thought I’d brave the lions, tigers, and bears—”
“Oh
my!” Jackson put in before I could finish speaking.
I
grinned in spite of myself, and Jackson made a zipping motion across his mouth,
which was my cue to continue.
“So,
I braved the big bad eleventh and twelfth grade hall because I wanted to invite
you to go bowling with Tegan, her sister, her sister’s boyfriend and a few
other people tomorrow night.”
By
the time I’d finished speaking, I was no longer looking at Jackson. Now that I
actually had the words out, I went back to worrying I was overstepping some
boundary and thinking maybe Tegan was completely wrong about my relationship
with Jackson and we weren’t really friends at all. My next fear was he would
think I was out of my mind for even asking him something like that. After all,
why would he want to hang out with a wee little freshman that didn’t even
register on the social radar?
Then
Jackson said, “Sure, sounds like fun. What time? And which bowling alley?”
Elated,
I looked up to meet his eyes, which looked more the color of melted toffee than
green today under the florescent glow. “We’re meeting at eight at Suburban
Lanes because they have cosmic bowling.”
“Okay,
sounds good,” Jackson nodded. “I’ll see you there.”
“Great,”
I nodded, forcing myself not to bounce in place. “I’ll see you.”
Instead
of stepping away like I knew I should, Jackson and I stayed in place and looked
at each other for a beat. Then someone slammed a locker nearby, shocking us
both into motion. I gave a little wave and Jackson did a quick salute before I
spun around and scurried toward my classroom.
On
the way, I noticed the hallways had thinned out significantly. I prayed I
hadn’t made Jackson late for class as I dashed into the Spanish classroom just
as the bell rang.
During
class Tegan kept whispering to me, trying to find out what Jackson said. I
ignored her at first because I didn’t want to disrupt Mrs. Willis’ lesson, but
finally I mouthed, “He said he’d go!”
I
refused to look at Tegan the rest of class even though I couldn’t fight the
smile playing on my lips. I was so happy Jackson had agreed to come, and I was
sure Tegan would have about a million questions to ask after class.
As
soon as the bell rang, Tegan and I followed the rest of the class out into the
hallway. There weren’t as many people in the hallway, but before Tegan could
begin asking questions about my conversation with Jackson, I said, “I’ll tell
you when we get to the cafeteria.”
“Fine,”
she huffed.
We
dropped our books off at our lockers and were discussing what we were going to
wear the following evening as we headed for the cafeteria. Normally, we would
have hurried in order to avoid Mark Moses, but apparently we were both too
distracted by our plans to worry about him.
So,
of course, we ran into him in one of the vacant halls.
As
soon as I spotted the mass of black that was Mark Moses midway down the hall,
my good mood flew right out the window. It had been a while since he’d managed
to corner me, and I was sure he knew that wasn’t an accident. For a moment I
considered turning back around and fleeing, but I didn’t think I’d manage to
get far.
“Hey,
Granger, just the kid I was looking for,” he snarled. With just a few long
strides he was standing in front of me.
I
glanced at Tegan, and from the worried crease of her forehead, I knew I wasn’t
the only one who felt nervous. The happiness that had resided in my belly had
evaporated, twisting into a bundle of knots.
Tegan
and I didn’t talk about Mark Moses often. It was easier just to pretend the
encounters with him never happened, but on the few occasions we had
acknowledged it, we’d wondered aloud why he only picked on me and took my lunch
money when he could have just as easily taken it from Tegan as well.
We’d
joked, feebly, that it was a good thing he only bothered me; otherwise, we’d
never get to eat. Tegan had been kind enough to share her lunch with me on
those occasions when we hadn’t been able to evade Mark Moses. Sometimes I even
gave her a few extra dollars at my locker for her to keep safe, and then I’d
give the rest to Mark Moses if he caught up with us. We’d been able to elude
him since Monday. I probably should have expected him to catch up with us,
though. My luck wasn’t that good.
Taking
a deep breath, I straightened to my full height, which was nothing on his mass.
I’d never seen them side-by-side, but I thought he and Jackson were close to
the same height. I knew from Jackson that he was six two. Even with the
additional inches to my height, that was still very tall compared to me.
Trying
to put on a brave face, I asked, “Did you need something?”
Of
course I knew what he needed—my lunch money, but since I was on a bit of a high
from speaking to and making plans with Jackson, I felt braver than usual. I
decided maybe it was time to use a new approach with Mark Moses.
“Come
on, Granger, don’t be stupid,” he smirked. “Hand over the cash.”
“No.”
I wanted my words to come out sounding confident and strong, but,
embarrassingly, my voice cracked as I said, “I need it.”
“As
it happens, so do I.” Instead of his typical menacing amusement, there was a
hard edge to Mark Moses’ voice, and I flinched when he held out his hand and
demanded, “Give it. Now.”
“No.”
I shook my head, heart pounding as I took a half step back. “Don’t you have a
job? Or parents? Can’t they give you money?”
As
soon as the words were out of my mouth, it was clear it was the wrong thing to
say. If possible, his expression hardened even further, making his usually
round, plump face suddenly seem razor sharp. Any bit of amusement that had
lingered was long gone.
Instead
of shouting like I expected, his voice was low and steady as he said, “Watch
your mouth. You don’t know nothing about me.”
The
smart thing to do would have been to keep my mouth shut and hand over the
money, but I couldn’t stop myself from countering. “You don’t know anything
about me either!”
I
knew in my gut I was just digging myself deeper and deeper into a hole I
wouldn’t be able to get out of. Tegan seemed to know this as well because she
tugged at the sleeve of my shirt as if to tell me to be quiet, but it was
already too late.
Before
I even had a chance to draw in a breath, Mark Moses was charging toward me. He
grasped my shoulders roughly, blunt nails digging into my skin through the
material of my shirt, as he pushed me up against a locker.
“You
sure don’t know when to keep your mouth shut, do you?” he growled, leaning down
and looking me in the eyes. His hot breath hit my face, sending tremors down my
spine. “I think it’s time for someone to teach you a lesson.”
My
stomach lurched and I cried out, processing the pain of his large, meaty hands
as they moved from my shoulders to squeeze my upper arms and hold me in place.
I tried to pull away, but everything seemed to be happening so fast. His hold
was so strong; he had me pinned to the locker. I didn’t know what kind of
lesson he was going to teach me. I didn’t want to find out. I knew it was going
to be bad.
He
backed away slowly, but the look on his face said quite clearly, “Don’t move,”
so I stayed put, hoping not to anger him further. Besides, I wasn’t entirely
sure I could have moved even if I wanted to; I was shaking so badly. He moved
down a couple of lockers and pulled one open. It, obviously, wasn’t being used
because there was no lock, but that did little to curb my terror.
Locker
open, Mark Moses reached over and grabbed me by the arm, pulling me toward him
and the open locker.
“Get
in,” he seethed.
“What?”
I sounded like the wind had been knocked out of me. Mark Moses didn’t
acknowledge my words. Instead, he grasped a shoulder, shoving me toward the
empty locker.
“Move
it,” he growled, pointing to the blackness within the small locker. “In!”
Somehow,
I was able to make my hands move forward. I braced them on either side of the
locker and tried to keep myself rooted to the ground as he tried to push me
inside the locker. I wasn’t strong enough, and I lost hold of the outside of
the locker. In the background, as if through a tunnel, I could hear Tegan
telling him to stop.
There
was a fierce pounding behind my ears, and I was certain my heart had leapt up
into my throat and lodged itself there because it felt as if I couldn’t get
enough air into my lungs.
Then,
it was as if everything stopped moving at a normal pace and slowed. Words
stopped making sense right before the world went silent, and I could no longer
feel my body as it was being stuffed into a dark, cold locker. The door slammed
in my face, but I didn’t register the sound as I was covered in darkness. For a
beat the slow motion remained.
Then
my heart beat picked back up, pounding in my ears as sound returned. But there
was just darkness and the sound my heart and heaving breaths as I gasped for
air. It felt like my heart would explode. There was no room. I couldn’t think.
I couldn’t move.
It
could have been a minute, an hour or even just a few seconds, but it felt like
an eternity, as the only thing my brain could comprehend was blind panic.
Would
I be stuck in here forever? Would he ever let me out? That was all I wanted. I
just wanted out. I’d never open my mouth again. I’d give him my lunch money
without any problem. I’d swear my life on it if he’d just let me out.
Then,
suddenly, there was light again as the door swung open. The first thing that
registered in my vision once my eyes adjusted to the light was Tegan’s face. Her
cheeks were pink and stained with tear tracks as more flowed from her stormy
bloodshot eyes; and her lips trembled as she helped me out of the locker with
shaking hands. I could hear Tegan’s voice again, but I couldn’t understand her
words.
I
nearly collapsed as soon as my feet touched the solid ground of the school
building, but Tegan held me up and pulled me to her. My whole body seemed to
shudder, and as sound began to make sense again, I registered a strange, high
keening and that was when I realized I wasn’t just crying; I was sobbing.
Panic
still prominent in my mind, I looked around, but I didn’t see Mark Moses. I
should have been relieved, but the terror was still too fresh to feel safe just
yet. I couldn’t find my voice either, but Tegan just made comforting shushing
noises as she led me to the nearest restroom.