Authors: Kailin Gow,Vi Keeland,Kimberly Knight,Cassia Leo,Addison Moore,Liv Morris,Laurelin Paige,Aleatha Romig,Jessica Sorensen,Lacey Weatherford
I didn’t miss Hudson’s warning glare to Celia. Even I, who hadn’t been lifelong friends with the man, knew that look told her to be careful what she said to me.
He didn’t need to worry. The conversation on the way to the restroom and while we waited in line was banal and trivial. Mostly Madge made snide comments about what other people were wearing and tried to discern what and how much Hudson had bought for me.
It was after I’d peed that the talk became interesting. Madge and Celia were powdering their noses in the side mirror, and didn’t see me come out of my stall. I moved to the sink to wash my hands, and found I could hear their conversation perfectly.
“She’s pretty,” Madge said. “I’m sorry she’s so pretty.”
“Mom,” Celia groaned. “Stop.”
“I’m sure it’s only a fling, honey. This is Hudson’s first real girlfriend. You never settle down with your first.”
I washed my hands for a long time, listening.
“Mother, I don’t feel that way about him anymore. I’ve told you. He’s psycho, anyway. You wouldn’t want our kids to have those genes.”
“He’s got better genes than most. And I know you say you’re over him, Ceeley, but you don’t have to pretend with me. Just make sure he gets thoroughly tested when you get him back.”
“Mom!”
An immense wave of rage swept through me. Not only because Madge had insinuated pretty shitty things about me and my sex life, though that did sting. But also because Celia, the woman who was probably Hudson’s closest friend, had called him a psycho. No wonder Hudson kept himself so guarded and shut off from the world. Even the people who were supposed to care most for him seemed to have no understanding or empathy for the inner demons that he likely fought on a daily basis.
No wonder he’d come looking for me.
I spritzed cool water on my face, attempting to fan my fury. Then I dried my hands and rejoined the Werner women. Even though I’d just been with him, I suddenly couldn’t wait to be with Hudson again. I regretted that I’d pushed him away. He needed me, I realized now, in a very profound way that I couldn’t put into words. And I needed him. I practically ran to the box.
Hudson put his arm around my waist when I came to him, though he continued his banter with Mr. Werner and I melted. Wanting even more contact with him, to share physically the epiphany I’d had in the bathroom, I slid my hand under his jacket, desperate to touch him more, gliding my fingers along his lower back.
He stiffened.
I withdrew my hand and he relaxed.
I had to concentrate to not let the sting of his rejection show on my face. Maybe he didn’t realize what I was trying to tell him. So I tried again in the dark when the symphony started again, placing my hand on his knee. Then I trailed it higher along his thigh.
He stopped me, taking my hand in his. He held it there for the remainder of the show, and though it still held warmth and strength, it felt like a restraint rather than a comfort.
Disappointment wrapped around me with a cold chill. I was too late. I’d pushed him away and now the invitation was gone. I was grateful for the dark. He wouldn’t notice my eyes filling.
After the concert was over, we walked out with the Werners toward the parking garage rather than the pickup area.
“I drove,” Hudson said, answering my brow raise.
He kept his arm around me as we walked. His touch was constant, but it was all pretend. The pressure and passion he’d shown me in private was missing.
Also gone were his eyes. Before, whenever I was with him, his eyes never left my body, my face. Now he didn’t make eye contact once and he barely talked to me at all. Instead, he chatted comfortably with Celia, sharing inside jokes. With each step we took, I felt more and more distraught. Sobs built up in in my throat and I concentrated on forcing them back down, keeping them at bay.
We parted with our companions at the Mercedes. Celia gave me a quick hug while Hudson shook Warren’s hand and kissed Madge on the cheek. I nodded to the Werners then Hudson held the door open for me as I climbed into the passenger seat.
Before getting in himself, Hudson said goodbye to Celia. I watched through the window, my stomach curling. He hugged her and whispered something in her ear that made her laugh. I wiped away the stray tear that slipped past my defenses.
Besides destroying me, watching them made me mad—mad as in crazy and mad as in angry as hell. Wasn’t Hudson supposed to be proving that he and Celia
shouldn’t
be together? And after I’d learned her true thoughts about him, I knew they shouldn’t be together. She was all wrong for him.
Envy spread through my veins like liquid ice. Celia might not have romance with Hudson, but neither did I. And she had friendship with him. At the moment, it appeared I had nothing.
We didn’t speak while we maneuvered through the long line out of the garage, Hudson humming fragments of the Brahms symphony as he drove. Was I the only one feeling the thick and heavy tension? A tension that seemed to grow thicker by the minute.
By the time we were on the road I couldn’t hold in my feelings of frustration and heartbreak any longer. “So you knew Celia would be there tonight.” It wasn’t a question. I already knew the answer, but I wanted him to say it.
His eyes widened, as if surprised at my harsh tone. “I knew Celia would be there with her parents, yes.” He glanced at me sideways. “Her parents, whom are friends with my parents, remember?”
Right. Fooling them was as essential as fooling Sophia Pierce.
What was my problem? I wrapped my arms around my chest and banged my head against the window once, twice, three times. I shouldn’t have been angry—he’d told me he’d be fake with me. I shouldn’t have been jealous—Celia had him as a friend way before I came along. And she didn’t have more than that.
And neither did I. Not since I’d ended things four days before. Funny how I’d been afraid that being with Hudson would make me fall into bad patterns. Instead, not being with him had been what triggered my anxiety that week and what made me feel so rotten at the moment.
Another tear slipped down my cheek. I dabbed at it with my knuckle.
“What’s wrong?” Hudson asked, concern in his voice. Or maybe it was simply puzzlement.
I considered what to say. I could keep the barrier up between us and evade the question. Or lie. Or confess my envy. Or I could be honest.
Unable to go another minute with the loneliness that had settled in my chest, honesty won over. “I want you,” I whispered, my face pressed against the glass, too embarrassed to look at him.
“Alayna?” I felt his eyes on me.
“I know what I said.” I wiped my eyes, determined to keep the rest of my tears in my eyes. “But maybe I was wrong. I mean, I don’t know if you’re right—if spending time with you can make me better. But I know that since we’ve been apart, I’ve been worse.” Taking a ragged breath, I braved a look at him. “I miss you.” A nervous giggle escaped from my throat. “Told you I get attached.”
A trace of a smile crossed his lips. “Where do you think I’m taking you?”
I glanced out the window, having not been paying attention to our destination. Lincoln. Headed East. We were blocks away from Pierce Industries. The loft.
I straightened, a blush crawling on my cheeks. “Oh,” I said, the lonely ache inside burning away with the spark of desire. Then irritation took over. “I told you no more sex, and you were taking me to the loft without asking?”
“Alayna,” he sighed with frustration. “You are a bundle of mixed signals. At the symphony you seemed to indicate—”
“And you totally blew me off,” I interrupted. “Don’t talk to me about mixed signals!”
He put his hand on my knee. “I was trying to avoid mixing business with pleasure. A difficult task with you, precious.” His voice grew low. “Especially with your wandering hands and how hot you look in that dress.”
I blinked. “Oh,” I said again. How did he do that? How did he compartmentalize, dividing the pretend from the real, never the two to cross while I tied myself up in knots?
“If you want me to ask, I will, though you know it’s not my style.” He took my silent stare as a “yes” even though it was simply me processing. “May I take you to my bed, Alayna?”
His request came out in a rumble that had my passion buttons going off like fireworks. “Yes,” I half moaned as he pulled up to a red light.
His hand moved to my head, pulling me to him. His mouth was greedy and full of need, his tongue tasting of deep lust and the Amaretto coffee he’d had at intermission. My panties felt slick, and the corset binding of my dress felt tight against my breasts.
The honk of a horn pulled him back to the steering wheel. He shifted in his seat and my eyes shot to the bulge straining his pants. My mouth watered, wanting it inside me.
Hudson shifted again. “Those hungry eyes are not helping the situation.”
And then we were there. Pulling in at the valet station of Pierce Industries. I was oblivious to the motions Hudson went through, greeting the valet, handing over his keys, moving to walk behind me toward the elevators, his hand firmly on my ass.
In the elevator we were alone. Hudson entered the code for the penthouse and, as soon as the doors closed, he pressed me against the sheer metal wall of the car. Pausing inches from my lips, his breath mingled with mine. “You’re so beautiful, Alayna.”
“Then kiss me.”
One side of his mouth curled up seductively. “I think I’ll take my time.” Slowly, he traced his nose against my jawline, and down my neck. I moved my mouth to try to capture his, but he was quicker, always a step ahead of me. His merciless seduction turned me on to no end, creating a pool of moisture between my legs.
His slow pace was killing me. “I think I’ll urge you to move faster.” I slid my hand down to fondle the bulge in his pants.
“Fuck me, Alayna!” he hissed as I continued to knead his erection through the material.
“You’ll get no protest from me.” I felt him growing stiffer under my palm. “Actually, I’d like to fuck you with my mouth.”
His eyes widened, but before I could act on my statement, the elevator stopped at the top floor. He pulled me out of the car, letting go of me to fumble for his keys. I rubbed his back while he unlocked the door, unable to stop touching him. “Get in,” he growled as he held the door open for me.
We’d only made it over the threshold, the door slamming behind us before he’d pushed me to the wall. He flipped on one light, then he took my face in his hands and my mouth in his, thrusting his tongue inside to battle with mine, his stubble chaffing against my tender skin. I loved his aggressiveness, as if he couldn’t get enough of my taste. I certainly couldn’t get enough of his.
But I’d been serious about wanting my mouth elsewhere on his body, and though Hudson liked to dominate our time together, I wanted to please him. While he still cradled my face, controlling the intensity of our kiss, my hands unzipped his fly and slipped inside to stroke him. Even through the material of his briefs, Hudson groaned against my lips at my caress.
His sounds ignited my desire. I pulled away from his grip and turned him to the wall. He was going to need support for what I had planned. Then I wrestled his pants and briefs down his legs enough to release his cock. “There’s the big boy,” I purred as I swirled my hand across his head. Catching a bead of pre-cum, I circled my fingers around his shaft and let the moisture glide my hand down his erection.
He moaned again, and I sank to my knees. Holding his cock at the base with one hand, I curled my lips around his crown, and sucked him gently. He gasped, gripping my hair in between his fingers, pulling it to the point of a delicious sting. “God, Alayna. That’s so…ah…so good.”
His praise encouraged me. I stroked my fist up and down his shaft, quickly developing a steady pace, while I licked and sucked his head into my hollowed cheeks. I gave him the full treatment, trailing my tongue along his thick ridge and softly grazing my teeth across his crown. He grew thicker under my attention, and my own arousal spiked.
I hadn’t thought whether or not I intended to suck him to orgasm, but suddenly I was desperate for it. I needed his climax, maybe as much as he did, and my mouth greedily portrayed that need.
“Alayna, stop.” Before I could react, his hands pulled my head away, his cock falling from my mouth with a pop.
Shocked and confused, I let him help me up. “Did I do something wrong?”
“No, precious. Your mouth is amazing.” He reclaimed my lips for a deep kiss. “But I need to come inside your cunt. I’ve been thinking about it for days.” He wrapped his arms around my back and began working on the ties of my corset. “And you need to be naked.”
I groaned, knowing it would take forever to get me out of my dress. “That will take too long,” I murmured into his neck.
“It has to be.” He pulled me tighter so he could see what he was doing over my shoulder. “I have to have access to your breasts. I love your breasts.”
I sighed and began working the buttons of his shirt. “Then you have to be naked, too.”
He shook his head against mine. “That will take longer.”
“But I love the feel of my breasts against your bare chest.”
His chuckle turned into a groan of frustration. “I don’t even want to know how you got into this dress. Turn around.” I did so, lifting my hair so he could work better. His fingers moved deftly and soon he had loosened it enough for me to take over.
I felt his fingers leave me and heard him fumbling with his own clothing. With my back still toward him, I slipped the gown off the rest of the way, and climbed out. Then I removed my panties. I left my shoes on, knowing he liked to do me in heels. Before I turned around, I took a deep breath, knowing that when I saw him naked, he would take it away.
And, boy, was I right. I’d only really gotten to look at him naked the one time in the shower, but I hadn’t forgotten how the sight affected me. His stomach was washboard tight, and his thigh muscles strong. And in between his legs, his erection stood proudly, even more virile and beautiful without his clothing to hinder the view.
Finally my gaze made it to his face, and I noticed he was leering at me with the same amount of intense desire I felt for him. Our eyes met. Then I was in his arms—his strong, beautiful arms—as he kissed me with deep hunger, my breasts smashed against his torso. Soon, he tucked his hands under my ass and lifted me. I wrapped my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck, as he adjusted my hips over his cock.