Incineration (Heart of Stone) (31 page)

I picked up my phone again and dialled Sam “Hi” he shouted
over some loud music “Where is he Sam?” I asked bluntly and he paused “I don’t
know, why?” he answered but not before he hesitated long enough to grab my
attention “Tell me Sam, where the fuck is he?” I snarled and he sighed “Ava,
just leave him” he said quietly as I heard a door click shut and the background
noise disappeared “I will not just fucking leave him Sam, where the fuck is
he?” I near shouted and I was gulping for breath in my fury “He’s at the club
where he told you he would be” he said slowly, trying to calm me “Okay, so if I
come down there; I’ll find him will I?” I asked angrily and I heard him
hesitate again “Ava please. You need to let him deal with this on his own. Don’t
be up when he gets in” he warned and I exploded “WHAT THE FUCK SAM? WHAT IS
GOING ON WITH HIM?” I shouted and I could sense Sam’s guilt as he sighed “Ava,
sweetheart. Please…” he gulped “OH FUCK OFF SAM!” I screamed and disconnected.

Courtney looked at me with sympathy and it was only because
she was my best friend I didn’t smack her “I don’t want sympathy Courtney, I
want fucking answers” I growled and she held her hands up “Ava…” she sighed.
“I’m sorry Hun” I closed my eyes and sagged down onto the sofa “I need to get
to the bottom of this” I told her and I was determined it was going to be
tonight.

Courtney left, against her wishes. She had wanted to stay to
make sure I was okay but I sent her home, needing to deal with Mason alone and
I turned all the lights off and settled on the sofa, awaiting his return.

At 4:30 he crashed through the front door and I stayed
silent as he bumped into everything on his way to the kitchen. I heard him
scramble around for something in the cupboards and swearing when he obviously
couldn’t find what he wanted “Fuck it!” he snarled to himself and walked into
the room, presumably to grab the whisky bottle from the cabinet in here. He
dragged himself across the room and switched on the lamp when he finally
managed to get to it.

He jumped when he saw me and he narrowed his eyes, his
pupils were shot and bloody, he had a few days growth and his clothes were
crumpled…he looked like shit! “Hey Darling” I smiled sweetly “What the fuck are
you doing up at this time? you need your sleep” he said “As though you care” I
scoffed and he glared at me “What the fuck Ava, of course I care” he hissed and
turned round to grab the whisky bottle but his reactions were too slow and I
got to it before him, grabbing it and storming into the kitchen I poured it
down the sink

“What the fuck are you doing?” he shouted and grabbed my
arm, trying to pull the bottle back. I slammed the empty bottle on the counter
“I think you’ve had enough Mason” I told him and he grabbed both my arms “What
the hell is wrong with you?” he snarled and I narrowed my eyes at him “What the
hell is wrong with me?” I scoffed and pushed him back but his grip tightened on
me “Let go of me Mason” I said slowly but he stood glaring at me, still
gripping my arms in a painful hold which I knew would bruise by tomorrow.

I pushed him more forcibly and he stumbled back this time
and I stormed into the room, him hot on my trail and the pure rage coursing
through me was the only thing giving me courage to stand up to his fury. He rushed
round in front of me, his face full of rage and his fists clenched. I regarded
him and shook my head sadly “Why won’t you talk to me Mason?” I asked sorrowfully
and I saw a flicker of remorse in his eyes but he quickly shut it away and
glowered at me “Ha! She wants to know why I won’t talk to her” he scoffed and
gestured to nobody in particular and then settled his gaze on me again. He
started slowly stalking me, leisurely walking towards me and as I backed into
the wall I was starting to get a little afraid.

It was obvious he was high and I was unsure of what he would
be capable of in this state. His hands slammed at the side of my head as he
caged me in and I swallowed heavily “You want me to talk to you Ava? Cause all
I wanna do is fuck you till you shut the fuck up” he said coldly, the
maliciousness in his voice turned my blood to ice and my eyes widened and my
breath halted at his vicious words.

 He cocked his head but then grasped my chin harshly in his
thumb and finger and pierced my eyes with his dead empty ones. My breathing
sped up along with my pulse and he crashed his mouth on mine, kissing me
roughly and I refused to give him a reaction so I stood still as his tongue
tried to force its way in but I remained tight lipped. He pulled back slightly
“Kiss me damn it” he ordered and came back down for another, bruising my lips
and pulling at my nearly healed stitches; now it was getting painful and I
pushed him back and slapped him hard across his stony face. His eyes widened
with shock and then he growled viciously and I wondered if I had gone too far.
I gulped as my eyes filled with tears but I refused to let them fall, denying
him a reaction to his callousness.

He pulled his lips angrily between his teeth and punched the
wall beside me “FUCK YOU AVA!” he roared and he stepped backwards and I took
the opportunity to slide past him, not wanting to be caged in again “What do you
want from me Ava?” he thundered and I turned to him and flung the DVD at him
“ANSWERS MASON, I WANT SOME FUCKING ANSWERS!!” I screamed and his face paled as
he saw the disc fall at his feet.

He looked up at me, his face now showing pain and horror
“Where did you find that?” he rasped and I shook my head “If you don’t want me
to see things Mason you should learn to hide them. You left it in the DVD
player” I said quietly and he raked his hands through his hair “
FUCK!!!”
he hissed “You weren’t meant to find that” he cringed and I scoffed “Well
fucking obviously. What is Mason, you wanted to keep it to yourself? You like
to sit watching us fuck eh?” I asked full of disgust

 “ARGHHHHH” he screamed and swiped the contents of the
sideboard onto the floor and punched the wall again…twice! “Oh for fucks sake
Mason” I slammed and turned to leave but he grabbed my arm again. There comes
another fucking bruise! He swung me round and stared straight into my soul
“Ava” he whispered and lifted his hand to my cheek and I flinched. He gasped
and pulled away “Ava…I wouldn’t hurt you” he breathed and I laughed bitterly
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing now eh? What is it Mason? What are you
hiding?” I yelled and he spun round pulling at his hair “You won’t understand”
he snapped and placed a hand on the wall, resting his forehead on it “Try me
Mason. We can’t work this out if you won’t tell me” I said, calmer now but he
shook his head and sighed “No Ava, you won’t” I bit my lip, preparing myself
for the answer to my next question “Are you fucking somebody else?” I asked
quietly and he turned sharply “No! No Ava” he swore but I shook my head sadly,
hurt at his refusal to talk to me “I’m sorry Mason. I can’t do this anymore” I
sobbed, the tears now finally flowing. He dashed over to me “Ava please” he
begged but I just shook my head “I can’t deal with secrets and lies Mason. Your
fucking mood swings are killing me and you are obviously back on the coke and I
refuse to let you make me suffer with you” I choked out and he stood silently
begging with his eyes. I sighed sadly and turned to leave “Ava…” he breathed
and I paused waiting for an explanation but he remained silent.

I let out a sob and carried my weary legs up the stairs and
pulling my case from the wardrobe, flung some clothes in it; not caring that
they would be crushed and creased. The need to get away from him spurring me on
and after retrieving my toiletries and ramming them into my case I yanked the
zip round, snagging it twice in my haste.

Pulling it behind me I descended the stairs and saw him
stood in the kitchen doorway looking broken “Ava Baby please…” he choked out
and his eyes broke my heart. The pure need and desperation in them giving me
reason to reconsider my decision.

I walked over to him and cupped his cheek gently and he
rested against it, closing his eyes and pressing a kiss into my palm “I love
you Mason, I always will. You helped heal me and give me back the confidence I
needed and I will love you for eternity for that alone” I whispered and he
opened his eyes “Then stay” he begged softly but I shook my head slowly “I
can’t Mason. You’re crushing my heart. You make it bleed Mason, drop by fucking
drop and soon you’re gonna squeeze it dry, destroying it completely” I sobbed
and he grabbed my hand “Please…” his own tears were falling now and I broke for
him “I can’t live with secrets Mason, I can’t. I’m sorry” I whispered and
turned to leave and walked away.

“Rebecca’s pregnant” he choked out and I froze my heart
finally shattering to the floor with my suitcase “W....w.what?” I stammered, paralysed
to the spot, the sight of him might suddenly crumble my composure “What did you
say?” I asked calmly and I closed my eyes as he repeated his words “Rebecca’s
pregnant” he said softly and sadly. Like the tenderness in his voice would make
it alright.

I lifted my chin in determination, refusing to break down
“How far?” I asked and he remained silent “HOW FAR?” I thundered “Four months”
he whispered and my throat closed in. Why did that bitch get the one thing I desperately
wanted? I sucked in my lips, trying to hold back the tears.

I clenched my fists tightly “I thought you said you always
used a condom with the others” for some reason it was this lie that hurt the
most; he had said that the lack of protection with us was down to the raw
passion we had, but obviously he had the same fucking raw passion with Rebecca
and it was this that choked the sob from my throat.

“Oh baby” he breathed as I heard him approach swiftly and I
spun round “
DON’T FUCKING TOUCH ME!”
I hissed acidly and he reared back
at the pure hatred in my eyes “I’m so sorry Ava” he cried and I gagged “My baby
is dead you bastard, possibly helped along by your fuck whore, yet you…you…you
and Rebecca…” I couldn’t finish as the pain ripped me apart and I held my hand
up as he reached out to me “No! No! No!” I screeched and turned, walked calmly
to the door and left, left him sobbing on the floor and I left my shattered
heart right there with him.

I was banging on Courtney’s door, loudly and repeatedly
“Courtney” I screamed “Courtney…please!” I begged and slid down her door,
sobbing uncontrollably on the step. I eventually heard her locks slide and she
opened her door and gasped at the sight of me “Fuck! Ava” she cried and bent down,
lifting me against her and steered me onto her sofa “Ava babe, what is it?” she
begged but I couldn’t calm down “Ava please” she sobbed, the sight of me
breaking her heart.

I was struggling to breathe and was making myself retch with
the extent of my crying so she sat embracing me and stroking my hair until I
calmed down “Please Ava” she wept as I screamed and sobbed and moaned as my
heart tore me in two with the physical pain. “Shush Ava, shush sweetheart” she
soothed as she held me tight.

It took me an hour to calm down and by the end Courtney was
pulling her hair out in distress “Ava please babe” she pleaded once more and I
finally managed to look at her “Rebecca’s having Masons baby” I choked out and
her face expressed every thought that tore through her; her skin paled, her
eyes blazed and her breathing sped up. She couldn’t speak through her own fury
and she inhaled sharply but stroked her thumb across my cheek gently and tipped
her head in sadness. I nodded in understanding and we wept again together as
her heart broke for me, along with my own.

“How far gone is she?” Courtney asked softly as we were sat
cradling coffee an hour later “Four months” I said, no tone or emotion in my
voice. She sighed heavily “Well that’s one thing. At least you know it wasn’t
while he was with you” she huffed and I nodded once. Her hands rubbed her pale
face “Oh Ava, I don’t know what to say babe” she sighed sadly and I shrugged “There’s
nothing to say, is there? Rebecca gets the baby and the man I want so desperately.
Maybe God doesn’t think I’m worthy of being a mother?” I said nonchalantly and
took a sip of coffee “Ava, that’s bullshit and you know it!” Courtney scolded
as my phone trilled a message

MASON

I know you won’t want to talk to me but I’m just checking
you are okay, you weren’t really in any fit state to drive and I’m worried…I’m
so sorry Ava. My heart is broken for you, for every fucked up thing I’ve done
to you and I will never forgive myself for hurting you like this. I love you
xxxxx

ME

I’m not dead! Sorry to disappoint you

MASON

DON’T FUCKING TALK LIKE THAT!!!

I refused to answer and stood up “Can I borrow something to
wear for the barbeque tonight Hun? I don’t want to go back to Masons” I asked
Courtney as her jaw dropped “You are never still going Ava?” I frowned at her
“Of course I am and I’m gonna get thoroughly fucking pissed” I grinned “in fact
let me text Liv and see if she minds you tagging along and we can get drunk
together. I bet there’s lots of hot guys” I teased and she nodded and stood,
walking over to the kitchen to pop some bread in the toaster “Okay but I’m only
coming to keep an eye on you” she winked and I laughed.

At 7 O’clock we pulled into a semi-circled gravel driveway
and looked in awe at the mansion in front of us “Jesus Ava” Courtney breathed
and I just nodded “Yeah” I puffed. We managed to find a spot to park; the
amount of cars in the driveway told us the party was already rocking and that
Liv and Nate had lots of friends.