In the Dark (24 page)

With that point driven straight through his chest like a knife she strode over to his bed and plopped down on the end. “What do you want to know?”

The grim line of her mouth and the cool distance in her eyes telegraphed all he needed to know.

Too late not to hurt her. He’d already done just that.

Regret trickled through him, but there was nothing to do but pursue the subject. He needed the information and the damage was done. Holding back now wouldn’t accomplish a damned thing.

“We can start with pet names.” He shrugged. “Did he usually call you any thing other than Elizabeth?”

“What does this have to do with the other woman?”

“Maybe nothing. But I need to be—”

“Yeah, yeah,” she cut in. “I get it.”

A moment passed as she appeared to collect her thoughts. She stared at some point be yond him. The drapes on the windows were closed, so certainly not at any enticing view.

“Baby,” she said abruptly as her eyes met his once more. “He called me
baby
when ever we…” She cleared her throat. “When ever we were intimate.”

“Baby,” he murmured, committing the term to memory.

“No.” She shook her head. “Not like that.
Baaaby.
With the emphasis on the first syllable.”

“Baaaby,” he echoed, drawing out the first syllable as if it were two.

She nodded once. “Yes. Like that.”

He propped against the dresser and let her talk. She seemed to know what he needed to ask and he appreciated that more than she could possibly comprehend. She shared the sexual vocabulary Maddox used. His euphemisms for body parts and the words that he whispered in her ear as they made love. With every word, every nuance of her voice he felt closer to her…felt the need to touch her. Tension vibrated through him to the point that every nerve ending felt taut with anticipation of what she would say next.

“He liked for me to be on top,” she said, careful to avert her eyes. “When I wasn’t on top he was usually…” She cleared her throat. “He liked to get behind me.” She fisted her fingers and hugged her arms around her middle. “He was very aggressive. Preferred to be in control other than the being on top thing.”

Joe wanted to make her stop, but he couldn’t. And yet with each new detail she revealed, his body grew harder, he wanted her more.

“Was there a certain…way he touched you?” he ventured, his throat so tight he barely managed to speak.

She blinked, looked away again. “My…ah…breasts. He always touched me that way a lot. Even when we were just kissing.” She rubbed at her fore head, then quickly clasped her arm back around her.

He couldn’t take any more of this. He’d hurt her and tortured him self physically. No more.

“Thank you for sharing such intimate—”

“Don’t you want to know how he kissed me?” She glared up at him then, the breath rushing in and out of her lungs. All semblance of calm or submissiveness was gone.

Joe straightened away from the dresser. “We can talk about this some more later. There’s—”

She rocketed to her feet. “He wasn’t that great when it came to kissing.”

Her eyes looked huge in her pale face. He couldn’t tell if what he saw there was fear or humiliation. Maybe both, and it tore at his guts.

“He used his tongue too much.” She paced the length of the room, then turned and moved back in his direction. “But I got used to it eventually.” She shrugged her shoulders, the movement stilted. “I was so busy with my work I didn’t have time to be too picky about my sex life. Really, what’s a busy woman like me supposed to do?”

Her lips trembled with the last and he had to touch her. She was close enough.

“Elizabeth, I’m sorry. I—”

She drew her shoulder away from his seeking hand but didn’t back off. “Are you really?” The accusation in her eyes dealt him another gut-wrenching blow. She took a step closer. “If you’re so sorry then what prompted your considerable erection, Agent Hennessey?” She reached out and smoothed a hand over the front of his jeans, molded her palm to his aching hard-on.

He moved her hand away but didn’t let go of her arm. “Don’t do this to your self, Elizabeth. I explained to you that the female contact was someone he knew before you came into his life.”

“And I know a lie when I hear one,
Joe.
”

He closed his eyes and ex haled a weary breath. Maybe he should have been up-front with her sooner. He should never have listened to Director Allen. Elizabeth Cameron was far too smart for these kinds of tactics.

“I had known something was wrong for a while,” she said, her voice soft, the fierce attitude having surrendered to the hurt. “We hadn’t made love in two months when he died. I’d only seen him two or three times. He called, but never talked for long. I guess I knew it was over. I just didn’t know why.”

It took every ounce of strength Joe possessed not to tell her the truth about David Maddox. He’d used her. He’d cheated on her all along. The latter came with the territory. No man who hoped to keep a clean relationship with a woman stayed in field operations. It simply wasn’t feasible.

“You don’t know that,” he argued, hoping to salvage her feelings to what ever extent possible. “There could have been a lot of things going on that prevented him from coming to you. Your safety for one thing,” he offered, grasping at straws. “Remember he sent me in to rescue you that one night when he was too far away to do it him self.”

She nodded distractedly as if her heart was working over time to justify what her brain wanted to reject.

“I would certainly have taken precautions to protect you if I had been in his shoes. Think about it, Doc. He cared about you. You were and still are a valuable asset to the Agency.”

Her eyes met his then and something passed between them, a sense of understanding.

“I’m certain you would have, Hennessey.” She inhaled a big breath and then let it out slowly. “But you
see I’ve been lying to my self for a while now.” She offered a halfhearted shrug. “I guess it made me feel less gullible.”

Joe tightened his hold on her fore arm, but carefully avoided pulling her closer as he would very much have liked to do. “Some times we believe what we want to believe, Doc, even when we know better.”

She searched his eyes for so long, he shifted in hopes of breaking the contact. Didn’t work.

“Are you really any different from him, Agent Hennessey?”

He wasn’t sure how to answer the question.

“I mean,” she frowned in concentration, “if having sex with a contact would garner you the information you needed, would you go that far?”

When she put it that way, it sounded like the worst kind of sin. “I wish I could say no, but I’d be lying.”

An “I see” look claimed her expression. “Well, at least you’re honest.”

“I won’t lie,” he told her in hopes of making the point crystal clear, “un less there is no other way, Doc. Lying is not something I enjoy, but it’s part of my job more often than not.”

She stared up at him then, puzzled. “Did you know I would give you the information you needed with out your having to seduce me?”

“Doc, this situation isn’t the same. You came into this knowing the mission.”

Her gaze narrowed ever so slightly. “Did I really?”

He had to smile. “To the extent you needed to know, yes.”

“But you didn’t answer my question,” she countered, refusing to give an inch. “Would you have resorted to seducing me if necessary?”

“I had my orders, Doc, and seducing you wasn’t included.” When she would have turned to leave, he caught her wrist once more and drew her back. “Had I not been restrained by my orders, I can’t say I wouldn’t have tried. But the effort wouldn’t have been about the mission.”

She searched his eyes again…as if looking for answers to questions she couldn’t voice. He wanted to lean down and brush his lips across hers. Just for a second, just long enough to feel the softness of hers.

But she walked away before he’d mentally beaten back his deeply ingrained sense of duty and did just that. He closed his eyes and cursed him self for the fool he was. He should have kissed her, should have shown her what a real kiss was like. Not some egotistical bastard’s sloppy attempts.

He’d had that moment and he’d let it slip away. Part of him had felt certain for just a fleeting instant that she wanted him to kiss her.

“Oh.”

He looked up, discovered her waiting at the door as if she’d only just remembered something of utmost importance and had decided to tell him before she forgot.

“I suppose I should tell you that you might have a bit of a problem with the female contact.”

Confusion joined the other tangle of thoughts in his head. “What kind of problem?”

“I believe I would avoid making love to her if at all possible, otherwise I’m certain she will recognize you as an imposter.”

His delayed defensive mechanism slammed into place. What the hell was she trying to say? “You noticed a difference between Maddox and me?” he challenged. He knew where this was headed. She’d gotten a good feel of him fully aroused. He wondered if she would
actually have the guts to cut him off at the knees, which was, in her opinion, what he imagined he deserved.

She nodded somberly. “I’m afraid so, Agent Hennessey. David was consider ably—”

He held up both hands, cutting her off. “I don’t think I want to hear this.” And here he’d been feeling sorry as hell for her.

“I was just going to say,” she went on as she planted one hand firmly on her hip, “that David was way, way
smaller
than you and I doubt any woman still breathing would fail to notice.”

E
lizabeth lay in bed that night and considered what Hennessey had told her. Her initial response had been to deny all of it. But she had known he was telling the truth. If she’d had the first reservation, his genuine regret would have allayed any and all.

Joe hadn’t lied to her. He’d tried to protect her.

She closed her eyes and remembered the way he’d looked at her as she’d given him the details of her intimacies with David. That the connection had made her restless to the point of becoming moist in places she’d thought on permanent vacation startled her. Just watching him react to her words had set her on the verge of sexual release.

No man had ever managed that…not for her.

All this time she’d considered her self some what lacking in the libido department, but Hennessey made her feel alive and on fire. How could that be?

From a purely psychological standpoint she understood that she had been celibate for longer than usual and she was still hurting from those final months before David had died. She’d known something wasn’t right. Now she knew what.

There had been another woman.

Maybe his involvement with her had been purely business, but that didn’t make her feel any better. Then again, Hennessey could be correct in his suggestion that David had been trying to protect her. But that would be giving him far too much of a benefit of the doubt. Even she wasn’t that gullible.

She and David had been over at least two months before his death.

So why had he kept coming back? Why those final calls? Why hadn’t he just told her it was over? It wasn’t like he had made any sort of major commitment.

Like any other woman, she had considered he might be the one. That the two of them could perhaps move to the next stage. Get married and start a family. But deep down, especially those last few months, she had known it was going to end.

She banged her fist against the mattress. Why on God’s green earth would she get involved with another man like David Maddox?

Evidently she was just as gullible as she’d thought. And seriously out of touch with her education level.

For goodness sakes, plain old commonsense screamed at the utter stupidity of this move.

And still she couldn’t help how she felt.

Yes, Hennessey was CIA just like David had been.

Yes, he was handsome and charming and sexy.

Just like David.

But there was one significant difference.

She thought of the way she’d touched him. Couldn’t imagine how she’d ever worked up the nerve to make that bold move. She hadn’t actually. She’d acted on instinct. With out thought.

Her heart bumped into a faster rhythm even now at the memory. There was no comparison between the two when it came to matters below the belt. Joe Hennessey was far more well-endowed than David. No way would a former lover
not
notice that disparity.

Elizabeth flopped onto her side and pushed away the confusing thoughts. She refused to get involved with another man until she knew all the facts related to her last relationship.

Was it possible that David had used her for more than mere sex?

She chewed her bottom lip and let the concept penetrate fully. Didn’t banish it immediately as she did when she was first asked to be a part of this. David knew the identities of the agents she’d transformed the same as she did. At least he had until the last year. They hadn’t discussed the last three she’d done because there had been no reason. He was no longer her handler and like any good member of CIA personnel, she hadn’t told.

Nor had he asked.

If he’d wanted to know, why didn’t he bring up the subject? Never, not once did he ever, ever ask any questions. He hadn’t even appeared interested.

But was that a front to keep her fooled?

She sat up, slung off the covers.

The conspiracy theories were ram pant now.

She’d never get any sleep at this rate.

Could he, if he were guilty of this heinous betrayal, have listened in on her conversations with Agent Dawson?

Impossible. Dawson always picked her up and took her to a secure location before giving her any details.

They never talked in her car, on her phone, landline or cell, or at her house.

It simply wasn’t done.

And David would have known those hard and fast rules far better than her.

A cold, rigid knot of panic fisted in her stomach.

He would also know how to bug her clothing, her purse, her body for that matter, in such a way that no one could tell.

“Oh, God.”

Wait. Maybe she’d seen one too many spy movies.

The whole idea was ridiculous.

But people were dead…more might die.

She had to know for sure.

The only way to do that was to go home and look for her self. She would never voice those thoughts about David with out some sort of confirmation. It just wouldn’t be fair. She had loved him. She couldn’t betray him like that simply because Joe Hennessey planted the seed in her mind.

Yes, things had been wrong some how between her and David those last few months but did that mean he had done any thing wrong? She didn’t know. One thing was certain, Hennessey had said there were only a handful of people who knew the names of those agents who were being picked off one by one.

David Maddox had been one of them.

Not giving her self time to change her mind, she slipped on her clothes and shoes, grabbed her purse and headed for her door.

Holding her breath she opened it.

The hall was clear.

After taking a moment to gather her courage she eased out into the hall and moved soundlessly to the stairs.

Ten seconds later she was in the laundry room at the rear exit.

Now for the real test.

The house was watched twenty-four/seven.

There was really no way to leave with out being caught.

That left only one option.

She dug her cell phone from her purse and called the one person she knew with out doubt she could trust.

“Hennessey won’t be happy about this.” Her driver wagged his head side to side resignedly.

“Just get me into my house, Agent Dawson,” she urged. “If any one learns we sneaked out I’ll take full responsibility.”

Dawson exhaled loudly. “I don’t think that’ll keep me out of trouble, Dr. Cameron, and it definitely isn’t necessary. When it comes to your safety I’m the one who is responsible.”

“I’m sorry, Agent Dawson,” she relented. He was right. “I don’t know what I was thinking. I don’t want to get you into any trouble.”

He didn’t slow to turn around. He just kept driving through the darkness to ward Georgetown proper and her brown stone.

“It’s all right, Dr. Cameron.” He glanced at her, let her see his determination in the dim glow from the dash lights. “If it means this much to you, then I’m more than willing to take the risk.”

Why were all the good ones taken?

Elizabeth sank back into her seat.

Just her luck.

The image of Joe Hennessey zoomed through her thoughts and she immediately exorcised him. Whether or not he was one of the good guys was yet to be seen. Just because he made her pulse leap and her heart stumble didn’t mean he was right for her. All it meant was that she needed to recoup some semblance of a healthy sex life. As Hennessey would no doubt say, she needed to get laid. Come to think of it, he would probably be happy to oblige her if she were to suddenly turn stupid again.

And she had zero intention of doing that.

As they neared Elizabeth’s home, Agent Dawson said, “We’ll park on the street behind your house and enter from the rear if that’ll work for you.”

She nodded, then remembered he probably wasn’t looking at her. “That’ll definitely work.”

“Once we get out,” he went on, “we need to move quickly.”

“I understand.” Her heart started to beat a little faster at the idea that she might very well be in danger. She’d told her self that being exiled to the safe house was about protecting Hennessey’s transformation, but maybe that wasn’t all there was to it.

She shivered. Maybe that’s what Dawson was worried about more than getting into trouble.

Surely he would tell her if that was the case.

Some thing else she didn’t need to worry about.

The street was still and dark save for a few streetlamps posted too far apart. Agent Dawson parked his sedan behind another lining the side walk and they got out.

“Stay behind me,” he instructed.

Elizabeth did as he asked, following right behind him as they moved through the side yard of the house directly behind hers. On this street the homes were small, single bungalows with postage-stamp-sized yards. A tall wooden fence lined the rear boundaries, separating these private yards from the shared space behind the brown stones. She and Agent Dawson stayed out side the fenced area, wading through the damp grass.

Her home, like the ones on either side of it, was dark, but the area around the back door was lit well enough by moonlight that she could unlock the door with out the aid of a flash light.

“Let me check it out first.”

She stood just in side her kitchen while he checked out the rest of the house. When he’d returned and given her the go-ahead she took his flash light, his assertion not to turn on any lights in the house unless absolutely necessary ringing in her ears, and went straight to her room while he guarded the rear en trance.

Though she and Agent Dawson had taken a number of journeys together in the past year, this was her first ever covert adventure with the man. She was quite impressed with his stealth and finesse.

He hadn’t dragged her into an alley and held her clamped against his body as Agent Hennessey had, but admittedly, the circumstances were different so there could be no actual comparison.

“Focus, Elizabeth,” she ordered, putting aside thoughts of Hennessey and his muscular body.

If David had wanted to learn about her work for the CIA he would have had to “bug” her. She felt confident that the CIA regularly monitored the vehicles they used and, certainly, Agent Dawson would keep him self bug free. But she, on the other hand, had no idea about such things. Hadn’t even anticipated the need.

First she checked through every single undergarment she wore to work. Nothing. She ran the beam of light over her room and located the jewelry box. Jewelry really wasn’t something she cared to accessorize with but occasionally she did wear a necklace or bracelet.

Nothing unexpected there.

That left only her clothes and her purses.

She did regularly change bags.

And each time Agent Dawson picked her up she had already changed into her street clothes. She wasn’t like a lot of the medical professionals who lurked around in public while wearing scrubs. Not that it was such a bad thing, she supposed. She simply wasn’t comfortable doing so.

She pulled the door to her walk-in closet almost completely shut, leaving just enough room to reach out with one hand and flip on the switch. Once the door was closed, she set Agent Dawson’s flashlight aside and started her search.

Every jacket, skirt and pair of slacks had to be examined from top to bottom, in side and out. She didn’t know that much about electronic listening or surveillance devices but, again, plain old commonsense told her they could come in virtually any shape or form.

Before diving into her clothes, she went through her
bags. There were fewer and they were certainly easier to rummage around in.

Nothing suspicious. A few crumbs from the packs of snack crackers she carried in one. A couple of dollars in another. Wow! A peppermint breath mint from her favorite restaurant in the last one she picked up.

She unwrapped the mint and popped it into her mouth before moving onto her clothes.

This would take for ever.

If Hennessey woke up she would be in serious trouble. She wondered if Dawson had told the other agent on duty about their little excursion. He hadn’t mentioned it and she hadn’t asked.

Hurry! Hurry!

Her hand stilled, backed up and moved over the pocket of her favorite slacks. A tiny bump. Her heart thundering, she reached in side and withdrew a small wad of chewed gum wrapped in tissue.

“Great,” she huffed.

The door to her closet suddenly opened and Elizabeth wheeled around to identify her unexpected guest.

Not Dawson.

For several moments she couldn’t breathe.

David.

Then the lingering redness and swelling crashed into her brain.

Hennessey.

“We’ve already done this, Doc,” he said calmly but those startling blue eyes gave away the fury brewing behind that laid-back exterior. “Our technicians didn’t find any thing. You’re not likely to, either.”

“This wasn’t Agent Dawson’s idea,” she said quickly. “I forced him to bring me here.” She smoothed her sud
denly sweaty palms over her thighs. “I threatened to come alone if he didn’t bring me.”

“Dawson and I have already spoken.”

“Oh.” She looked around at the wreck she’d made of her closet. And she’d thought the worst thing she had to worry about was falling prey to Hennessey’s charm. Look at what she’d done. She wasn’t equipped to play this kind of game. “I guess I’ll just clean up this mess.” She manufactured a shaky smile for him. She refused to admit that coming here had been too dumb for words. She’d needed to come. “You don’t have to hang around. Dawson will bring me back.”

“I sent Dawson back already.”

She blinked, tried to hide her surprise. “Okay.” She reached for a jacket lying in a twist on the floor. “I’ll be quick.”

“I’ll be waiting.”

He exited the closet, closing the door behind him.

Elizabeth stood there for a time, grappling for compo sure.

David had cheated on her. She didn’t need any evidence. She
knew.

The CIA obviously thought he’d used her as well or they wouldn’t have been nosing around in her house. There was no arguing that conclusion. A part of her wanted to be angry, wanted to scream, but what was the point? It was done. David had done this to her.

Elizabeth closed her eyes and fought back the tears. She would not cry for or about him. He was gone. He’d been gone for a long time before he died.