In The Absence Of Light (39 page)

The hard line of Mr. Day’s mouth curled into a half sneer. “The only reason Catherine restructured her will was because she wasn’t in her right mind. The chemo impaired her judgment. If I wanted to challenge the will, it would never hold up and you’d be in debt for a lawyer you couldn’t afford.”

“I don’t need a lawyer. I don’t want the money, the company, anything.”

Mr. Day flicked a look over Morgan. “Is it notoriety? Because there’s no birth certificate with my name on it.”

Greg nodded at the contract Mr. Day held. “I think—”

Mr. Day held up a hand. “I will not play your game, Morgan. What is it you want?”

He slapped his hand on the table, one, twice, three times. Two of the water bottles fell over. Luckily, they had the caps on. “I don’t—” Morgan’s words disintegrated into a mewling sound. “I don’t—”

Abigail looked at Morgan who nodded. She said, “He doesn’t want anything, Mr. Day. Not everyone’s money hungry. Morgan is happy, and that’s all he cares about. He didn’t contact Mrs. Catherine Day; she contacted him. He didn’t want her money. That’s why he never took it.”

“I know about her giving Mrs. Kade money.” He addressed Morgan when he said it. “She seemed to have no trouble taking it.”

“Because she couldn’t work,” Morgan said. “I can work. I don’t want your money.”

“You’re a busboy.”

“It’s a job. It pays the bills. That’s all I need.”

“Take the contract back with you to the hotel,” Abigail said. “Read it. Have your lawyers read it. There’s nothing special in there. No loopholes. No arrangements for future arbitration. ”

Morgan’s father tossed the group of papers onto the desk. “Let’s go.”

“Mr. Day—”

He cut Lucy off with the same cold gesture. “I don’t know what you’re trying to do, Morgan, but whatever it is, it won’t work. I will fight you, and I will win.”

Morgan shoved himself away from the desk. He was at the door before I could even stand. Mr. Day grabbed him by his arm.

“Catherine had an affair before we were married. She didn’t want me to find out. She tried to get rid of you. The doctors said that’s why you’re…” Mr. Day sneered. “She tried to abort you in some backwoods clinic, and it failed. Then when you were born, she threw you out with the garbage to keep her family from finding out she was nothing but a whore.”

A tremor ran down Morgan’s body. He pulled from his father’s grasp and shot out the door. I went after him. My shoulder caught Mr. Day’s hard enough to send him stumbling.

I hoped he fell on his ass.

The bells on the door clanged. “What’s wrong?” Jessie came out from behind the bar as I ran through the dining room.

“I’ll handle it.” I grabbed the door before it could finish closing. Morgan was already by the truck, pacing back and forth. His wayward hand bumped against his temple. “Morgan?”

He pulled away. “T… t… t…” He hit the truck. “Take. Take. M… m… mmm… ee h… h…” Tears gleamed on his blood red cheeks. The rest of his words were lost under a wounded cry.

“Okay.” I opened the passenger side door. “I will. Get in and I will.”

He took one step forward, two back. Would he win this battle with his body? The tremors grew more fevered. Spit flecked his lips.

“Morgan.” I held my hand out to him. “Morgan, please.”

Pain, fear, humiliation, it turned his beautiful dark eyes into a window of hell. It was the first glimpse I’d had of the prison he lived in. A captive to the uncontrollable tics ravaging his body. I think it was then I understood the solace he found in the light. Just as it blinded the world to seeing what was there, it blinded Morgan. It tucked him away from the things he could not control and the things reminding him he was different. How he would never truly fit in. How he existed on the edge between here and wherever it was he went when the light spoke to him.

My heart broke. One sharp crack of pain. I’d never felt anything like it. And if it was one tenth of the agony Morgan felt in that moment, I didn’t know how he survived.

“Take. Me. Home.”

I nodded. “I will.”

“Home.”

“I promise, Morgan.”

“Home.” He moved around me and got into the truck.

I took out my keys, and the bells on the restaurant door jingled. Abigail stopped on the sidewalk. I shook my head, and she nodded once. Then I got into the truck.

Morgan didn’t speak on the way back to his house, and while the knots in his body tightened, he managed to keep his hand subdued to his lap, meeting every attempt at escape with a tight grip and hard pull.

He’d have bruises tomorrow. There was no way he couldn’t.

I’d barely pulled into the driveway when he threw open the door.

“Morgan, wait.” I followed him around the side of the house.

He stopped, but I don’t think it was because he wanted to. His hand fluttered erratically, and his gaze jumped in every direction. He tilted his head up, to the side, then back down.

Morgan rocked on his heels.

I cupped his face, and he closed his eyes.

“Look at me.”

He clenched his eyelids.

“Please, Morgan. Please look at me.”

Tears trickled down his cheeks. I wiped them away, but they wouldn’t stop.

“Nothing that asshole says matters. Do you hear me? Nothing.”

“But what if it does?” His hollow gaze met mine.

“It doesn’t.”

But he didn’t believe me. Like a horrible stain; there it was in his eyes. This beautiful man, his incredible talent, his insight to the world seeing things no one else could perceive or were strong enough to acknowledge, doubted himself.

What frightened me more was the idea he might even doubt his reason to exist.

I needed him to know how wrong he was, but I had no idea how to do that. Give me valuables to smuggle, hide, or sell and I was a magician. But facing the battle of Morgan’s self-worth, I was at a loss.

I smashed my mouth against Morgan’s and swallowed the yelp that escaped him.  Copper mixed with his natural flavor, but I didn’t care. I kissed him until my jaw ached and lips my burned.

A few steps back sent him off balance. I chased him to the ground, trapping him under me.

Morgan worked his mouth against mine hard enough to grind our teeth together.

I shoved his shirt up and found his nipple. Pinching them earned me a surprised gasp. I twisted and the sound turned into a pleading cry. I sucked one then the other.

He pawed at my shirt.

“Grant…” Morgan rocked against me. “Oh god… god…”

The zipper on his jeans didn’t want to open so I yanked the fabric until the teeth gave way.  His cock found my hand. The head was already slick when I stroked him.

Morgan dug his fingers into my shoulders.

“I’m going to make you come. I’m going to make you come over and over until you can’t even think.” He wailed when I tightened my grip. “And you’re not going to fight me. You’re going to give yourself to me, Morgan. You’re going to trust me because you told me you did.” I dragged my thumbnail across his slit.

He hissed between clenched teeth.

“And do you know why?”

Morgan shook his head.

“Because you’re perfect and for some reason you find me worthy of your perfection. Because you’re a gift and I will not let you forget that.” I brushed my lips against his. His dark eyes searched mine. “And do you know the most important reason?”

“No.”

“Because I love you.” I moved down and took his cock into my mouth. Clean sweat, his musky skin, it worked like an aphrodisiac crawling into my senses. I sucked him. I fondled his balls. I used every trick I knew, my tongue along the glans, pressing him against the roof of my mouth, going deep, shallow. His muscles turned to rocks under my hands. I bobbed my head faster, and he pulled my hair. The bitter salt of precum replaced his natural flavor, but that was all.

I gripped him again. The cords on Morgan’s neck stood out. The flush was back in his cheeks. His golden hair caught the broken pieces of sunlight dancing around us and all but glowed against his skin.

“Come for me.”

He shook his head.

“You will.”

He shook his head again.

I yanked off his jeans, taking his shoes with them. “You will, Morgan. I won’t give you a choice.” I stuck two of my fingers in my mouth and descended on him again. He spread his legs without hesitation.

As soon as I pushed my fingers into his opening, he shouted, “More, please, more.”

I pumped them in and out with as much force as I sucked him.

It had never bothered me this much before when Morgan refused to let go. I knew it was something he had to do. A kind of proof that he wasn’t completely at nature’s mercy.

But this time, it pissed me off. Not at him, but for the reasons he did it.

That would change.

I moved over him and undid my pants. Dried grass tickled the head of my cock while I milked it. I wasn’t sure it would be enough so I coated the head in spit.

Morgan grabbed his dick, and I slapped his hand away. “That’s mine. You’re mine.” He started to protest, but I shut him up by pushing into his ass.

His mouth fell open. I thought I’d hurt him until he bowed off the ground and locked his ankles behind my back.

I thrust in long slow strokes, pulling to the tip and shoving my cock deep enough to bruise my balls. Morgan reached for his dick again, and I pinned his wrists above his head.

He rolled a look up then back at me.

“I told you, you were mine. All mine, Morgan. Perfect. Beautiful.”

Under the fire of pleasure in his gaze, there was a flash of doubt. “I’m not.”

“What did you say?” I made two short pumps and one hard reentry.

“I’m not.” His scream broke apart into needy whimpers.

“You are.” I thrust faster. “You are and you’re going to say it.”

He gritted his teeth.

“Say it, Morgan, say ‘I am beautiful.’”

“No.”

“Say it.” I shoved my cock into him hard enough to push him a few inches across the ground.

“Oh god, Grant, please, please, I need to come.”

“Not till you say it.”

“No.”

“Then you won’t ever come.” I dropped my forehead to his. “And I will fuck you into the ground.”

“Grant, please…”

I licked the tears off his cheeks. Morgan tried to kiss me, and I turned my head. He fought against my grip, but I had the advantage of body weight.

“All you have to do is say it. Tell me you’re beautiful, Morgan.” I should have been ashamed by the horror reflected back at me. “Tell me.” Sweat dripped from my chin onto his.

Morgan pressed his lips together.

Deep in his ass, raging with the need for release, I stopped.

“Goddamn you, Grant.” Morgan thrashed. “Move, move.”

Unlike Morgan, my words were a whisper. “Say it.”

The stubborn shield he protected himself with cracked and his expression crumbled. The sob that broke loose hurt, but I’d taken this too far to back down. I needed him to know just how much I believed the words I said and needed him to say them.

“I…”

“Louder.”

“I’m beautiful.”

I rewarded him with one slow roll of my hips. “Again.”

“I’m b… beautiful.” Another stroke and he moaned.

“That’s it, baby.” I found a short quick rhythm. “Now, tell me how perfect you are.” He hesitated, and I slowed down.

“I’m perfect.” He sobbed again. “Grant, please.”

“Say it again. All of it.”

“I’m beautiful. I’m perfect.”

“I love you, Morgan. Tell me that.”

“Grant…”

“Say it, Morgan, or I swear to god, I’ll stop.”

“Y… you… love me.”

“More than anything.”

“More than… anything.” His eyelids fluttered. “Now please let me come.”

“Not yet.”

“I said it. I said what you wanted me to.” Morgan inched his legs higher and attempted to use the closeness of our bodies to stroke himself.

I arched my back, making space between us.

“Goddamn you.” He tore the grass within his reach.

“Come for me, Morgan. Prove to me you trust me and let go.”

That stubborn veil tried to fall back into place, but the damage was done.

I pumped my hips. “Let me love you.”

“Why?”

“Because I want the chance to treasure you. Worship you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

“You don’t mean it.” He bit his lip.

“Yes, I do.” I gave him two hard thrusts. “You can feel that I do. You see it.” I freed his hands. “Like everything else, Morgan, you see the truth.”

He petted my face. Traced my mouth with his fingers. He stared at me. Through me. Then he opened himself. The beauty I’d thought I’d known was nothing compared to the glimpse he gifted to me in that moment. His vulnerability, his capacity to love, his willingness to trust. Morgan not only showed me those things, he pulled me in, wrapped me up, and whispered the secrets of his world in my ear.