In Rapture (Destined) (8 page)

Malinda
felt Sophia gripping her hand, but she did not squeeze it nearly as hard when
Mule approached them. “Sit, Mule. Sophia, if you put out your hand like this,
Mule will make friends with you quickly.” Malinda showed her how to cup her
hand just below his nose to let him sniff. The little girl looked up at her
with huge blue eyes. “Go on, Sophia.”

Sophia
raised a tentative hand, just as Malinda had shown her, and cupped it below
Mule’s nose. Mule sniffed the hand curiously, before his long tongue licked the
tiny fingers. Sophia giggled in surprise, but continued to hold her hand up.
She looked up at Malinda, a small smile lighting up her face. “Nicely done, my
dear. Now this great oaf will be your friend for life. Do you know what Mule
loves the best?”

Sophia’s
head shook from side to side in a slow solemn motion. Malinda patted her on the
head. She hoped that one day soon, the child would open up enough to verbalize
her thoughts, but for now, at least she understood her. “He loves to be
scratched right behind his left ear, like so.” Malinda ran her fingers behind
Mule’s left ear. As she scratched, his hind leg started to kick up and down in
the air, so fast he looked like he was trying to tread water right there on the
ground. Another carefree giggle filled the air.

“So
now that you know his big secret, perhaps you will feel comfortable playing a
couple of games with us.” Malinda held her hand out to Sophia and waited for
her to grab on. They started to walk down across the small hillside behind the
manor with the large dog ambling beside them. When they reached the apple
orchard, Malinda picked up an apple and turned to Sophia.

“Sophia,
watch and learn. This is one of Mule’s favorite games and I’m sure he would
love to play with you too.” Malinda patted Mule on the head and gave him a
great big scratch behind the ears to catch his attention. “Mule? Are you ready
boy? Fetch!” Malinda threw the apple as far as she could manage and watched the
mastiff dash after it. He almost tripped over his legs when he stopped, for
when the big dog picked up momentum, it was sometimes difficult for him to stop
quickly. He grabbed the apple in his mouth and galloped back to them. “Drop it!”

“What
do you think, Sophia? Do you want to play?” She watched the little girl
closely, worried that perhaps she might be pushing her too far, but Sophia
grabbed the apple swiftly from her hand. Sophia pointed at Mule as if to get
his attention and his eyes instantly focused on her. The little girl threw the
apple as far as her little arm would allow her and the dog jumped away to get
it. He did not have nearly as much distance to travel since Sophia was not
strong enough to lance it far away from them. Mule brought it back to Sophia
and waited with the apple still sitting in his mouth. Sophia pointed to the
ground and Mule dropped the apple at once. Malinda was astounded at how well
Mule seemed to understand Sophia.

Malinda
sat down on the ground underneath one of the apple trees and watched as they
played several more rounds of fetch. The warm breeze in her face made her feel
more peaceful than she had felt in a long time. Her eyes misted over as she
watched the little girl bravely hug Mule before playing yet another round of
fetch. She heard a slight rustling in the leaves above her and looked up. A
large black bird sat at the lowest rung of the tree in front of her and, while
most people would find this odd, it was actually a common occurrence for
Malinda. She smiled at the bird and nodded her head. “A nice day for some fresh
air, right, my friend?”

The
bird tilted its head at her, as if it were curious at such a greeting. Its only
response was a gentle caw, but there was something familiar about the golden
eyes that narrowed in on her. She could not quite place where she had seen them
before, but somehow she knew she should recognize them. As if he were aware of
her scrutiny the bird flew farther away from her, but she could still see him.
He was perched closer to Sophia now and his head was rotating from the dog to
the girl. Malinda laughed at the bird. It was almost as if he were entranced by
the little girl who played so carefree with the large dog that was obeying her
silent commands so easily. “Don’t you worry, my friend. She may be quiet, but
she has more of the world figured out than either one of us know.”

When
the bird flew off at her words, she felt a little sadness creep into the air.
She breathed in the air around her, wondering if perhaps the bird had sensed a
message on the wind. When she did not feel any other change around her, she
decided she must have imagined the sadness, for the world around them was now
covered in non-stop giggles as Mule was covering Sophia’s face with sloppy wet
kisses. “That’s enough, Mule. Sophia does not need a tongue bath.” She snapped
her fingers, and Mule came running to her side.

Malinda
smiled at Sophia. “Come, little one. It’s time for your afternoon nap. It will
be dinner time before you know it.” They walked hand in hand back to the manor
and Malinda relinquished Sophia’s care to Desiree. Malinda decided that she
would head up to the attic to see if she could find anything that would make
Sophia’s nursery a brighter place.

Chapter 12

Malinda
made her way up the small staircase that led to the attic. Following Gertie’s
advice she brought a lantern up with her, for while candle light covered the
hallway below through the well-placed glass orbs that hung in the hall, the
attic would not be covered in light. She took a deep breath as the darkness of
the attic surrounded her. While the small light of the lantern trickled into
the air around her, it was little consolation against the haunting space in
front of her.

“All
right. Where would children’s items be stored up here?” She set the lantern
down on a small table to the left and put a thoughtful finger to her mouth,
tapping it in concentration. She could see a rocking chair at the back of the
attic and decided to start in that corner. At the very least Sophia could sit
in the rocking chair near a bright window, and she might feel comfortable
enough to let Malinda read to her as they rocked together in the afternoon
light.

Malinda
put a hand on the chair and several images entered her head. She jerked her
hand away quickly as she took in each of the pictures, but they would not stay
in her mind long enough for her to make sense. There was only one thing she
could think to do, so she took a deep breath and took the plunge. As she sat
down in the chair the wooden legs started to move, and she found herself rocked
to another time and place. She kept her eyes closed and let the images move
slowly through her. Malinda saw the same chair facing a window in a brightly
lit room. As it was turned away from her, she could not see who was sitting in
it. She forced her mind closer to the images and was surprised to find that a
man held a squirming baby with dark tufts of hair. It was easy to tell that
this was Grant and Sophia. The gentle smile he beamed upon his child showed a
love untouched by the darkness that now blanketed the halls of Wickford Manor,
and while there was love etched deeply on his face, there was sorrow behind his
golden eyes. She wondered if this had something to do with Maria Timberlin’s
death.

She
did not feel Maria’s energy in the chair. Had she died in childbirth? Did the
past really matter? She sat there at a crossroad of emotions. Half of her
needed desperately to know what happened to Sophia’s mother, why the little
girl had grown up motherless and afraid. The other half would rather not know
what had happened to this family. To know what had destroyed Grant’s happiness
somehow made him more real, more touchable, and she just did not need the
attachment. Malinda did not crave such closeness.

Malinda
heard the sound of footsteps climbing the staircase and stood to face the
intruder. She was surprised to see Grant’s face peering over the stairwell. She
wished she could blend into the background, for she was not prepared to see him
right now.

“Malinda?”

“Yes?”

“Gertie
told me I might find you up here. We need to talk.”

She
let his words fall between them as she stared uncomfortably down at her feet. “Fine.
Talk.” She turned around toward the rocking chair and willed the images of a
gentle, loving man to leave her mind. She did not need to even dwell on the
possibility that Grant could still be that man, for that was a frightening
thought. That was the kind of man that she could lose her heart to forever,
something she had promised that she would never do. It was a much better idea
for him to keep her at arm’s length, for it was certainly a lot safer for her.

“Malinda.”
Grant had crossed the attic almost effortlessly and grabbed her arm to face
him.

“I
said talk. I’m listening; I just have to sort through some things for Sophia’s
nursery.” She wrapped her other hand around his and pried his fingers away. She
looked up at him and was surprised to find amusement rather than anger, and
that was entirely unexpected. Malinda had no idea how to react to it.

“You’re
not afraid of me.”

She
smirked at him. “I’m sorry. Was I supposed to be? I know. Why don’t you go back
down the stairs and try again.” She could not help the sarcasm that entered her
voice. While the vision she had seen earlier showed a gentle man, this one was
completely dangerous. The heat of his nearness sent uncomfortable waves up and
down her neck.

Malinda
felt his hand move to cup her face, and the time and space before them seemed
to shift completely away. She looked into his eyes and saw a heat burning just
below the surface. She waited, almost breathless, for the kiss she knew was just
a moment away from her. She closed her eyes as his mouth touched hers. The
pulse in her neck gathered momentum and its dull pounding turned to a rapid
roar that flew up to her ears. She felt every part of her drawing closer to him
and she was reminded once more of the phantom lover in her dreams. Malinda let
her hand travel up to his chest and was soon grasping his shirt between her
fingers as his own hands splayed against her back. Her soft murmur fell against
his lips and she did her best to pull away from his embrace.

“I
thought you said you wanted to talk.”

“We
are. Don’t you feel the way our bodies speak to each other, Malinda?”

She
felt her nerves fraying like the edge of a rope and she desperately desired a
safe distance between them. “I can’t do this right now, Grant. I really need to
get some things down to the nursery for Sophia.”

He
looked at her with hunger, but he held himself at bay. He seemed to know that
pushing too far with her at the moment would make her take flight. “What do you
need brought down? Perhaps I can help you get started with that?”

“Well,
the only thing I have found so far is this chair.” She ran a finger against the
arms of the rocking chair, almost wishing to see the gentle man from her
vision, but was only disappointed when it did not appear.

When
he did not answer her she looked up to see that the desire that had lived in
his eyes just moments before had fled. Malinda saw his eyes rest on the rocking
chair for a moment and it was as if the life had been sucked out of him. She
could not understand what had just happened to him. She ached to reach out to
him, to comfort the soul of the tortured man before her.

“That
stays here.” Grant’s gaze burned holes into the chair with a heat that could
have incinerated it on the spot.

“No.
This will go downstairs. That doesn’t make any sense.” She gathered whatever
courage she had and faced him with, her chin jutting out. Perhaps it was the
recent surge of emotions that made her feel she should push forward, maybe it
was the vision that still lingered in her mind; whatever it was gave her
courage to proceed. Somewhere deep inside her she knew that Grant should not
fear the memory of his past.

“Excuse
me?” Grant looked down at her, the steel in his voice mirrored in his eyes. He
seemed taken aback by her direct nature.

“Sophia
needs a chair for her room. Have you seen her nursery lately?”

“If
you need a chair I will get you another, but this one stays here.”

“Why,
Grant? This chair is perfectly acceptable and it’s already here.” When she saw
the anger flash across his face she backed down. “I’m sorry. If you wish for
this chair to not be used, I will respect those wishes. Anything else?”

He
turned away from her and started to move toward the stairs. Malinda followed
swiftly after him, a breathless fear entering her. “Grant?”

“We
will talk later, Malinda.”

Malinda
saw the way Grant fidgeted before her, and while she could not tell what he
thought, she could sense his need to leave. She felt the energy in the room
between them, almost like a dark cloud had covered all the sun in the skies. It
was true his past was embittered, it was easy to read it on his face, but she
wished he would try to deal with his past rather than push it aside. She
watched him leave the attic with a sense of emptiness.

The
finality of his statement echoed in her head. Talk. They were going to talk.
Why did it feel like she was heading to a death sentence then, if they were
just going to talk? She tried to get a grasp on the situation, but the only
thing she knew was that Grant used to be a happy, loving man and that any
connection to that past seemed to make him uncomfortable. Perhaps he was no
longer comfortable with the idea of love. That was no obstacle for them. In
fact, that suited Malinda just fine. She never intended to fall in love with
any man. Malinda would not lose everything she had as easily as her mother had.
The Adrianic magic of her heritage was a gift, but it was also like a curse. If
she did not guard her emotions well she could end up mindless and alone. Her
mother was proof of that. While Malinda should have been angry with her mother
for not caring enough for her child to snap out of the darkness that had
surrounded her, she had never been able to feel that anger. How did you miss
what you never knew? She had lived a good life with her grandparents. They had
given her everything she could ever have hoped for. Now Malinda hoped she could
do the same for Sophia, but she had to realize at some point that the picture
she painted in her head would have to include Grant. She would just have to
figure out how to safely paint him into her world.