In Name Only (57 page)

“David!”

“Miss Caroline?”
she heard Kip’s normally deep voice softly say.

“Kip, where are
you?”

“I’m. . . here,
Miss Caroline.”

Caroline followed
the direction of his voice and dragged herself to the other side of the
carriage.  The bottom half of Kip’s body was lying beneath it.  A pool of blood
was drifting slowly from under his back and legs.

“Kip, you’re
bleeding!”

“Yes, Ma’am, I
am.”

“What happened?”

“I think an
animal squealed and it must’ve scared the horses. The carriage tipped back and
one of the wheels came off.  I think the horses are long gone.”  Kip’s deep
voice seemed high-pitched.

“Let me help
you.” She took hold of his hands to pull him out from under the carriage.

“Ahhh!” he
screamed as she yanked.  “Please don’t do that, Ma’am.”

“But you’re
bleeding, Kip. I must get you out.”

“Don’t worry
yourself about me.  Mr. David’s still in the buggy, I heard him moaning a few
minutes ago.  Best you get him out first then perhaps. . .” he winced again. 
“Perhaps I can get out.”

“Oh, Lord,” she
mumbled.  Caroline grabbed a stray box and stepped on it.  The carriage door
had already been torn off.  She peered inside.  Darkness was closing in and
Caroline could just make out where David was lying, unconscious, on the side –
now floor – of the buggy.

“David!” she
screamed.  He began moaning.  “David, please.”

“Caroline,” he
whispered, “are you. . .hurt?”

“My leg is hurt,
but otherwise, I’m fine. We’ve had an accident.  The horses got spooked and it
looks like one of the wheels came off. Kip is under the carriage and bleeding.”

“My head hurts.”

Caroline
shuddered. 
That’s what Liam said just before he died
.

He lifted himself
up.  “I think I’ll be able to get out of here.”

Caroline reached
her hand inside to assist David through the door, carefully trying to avoid
added weight on Kip lying underneath.

David held his
hand up, then fell back down.  Kip moaned.

“I’m not sure I
can lift myself out, Caroline. Kip, are you injured?” David hollered from
inside the carriage.

“Yeah, Mr. David.
It’s hurting real bad.  I feel like I’m gonna pass out.”

“Hold on, Kip,
I’m going to try again.”

David tried to
stand up, then his eyes started to close and he slumped back inside the
carriage.

She gasped.
Though she was now feeling an overpowering urge to retch, she called to him. 
“David, please.”  He was unresponsive.  She crawled closer to Kip.

“Oh, Kip, what
shall I do?  You both need help.  And I’ve scraped my leg.”

“Not sure,
Ma’am.  We. . .passed a few cottages on the way, perhaps a mile or so back. 
You. . .think you can walk that far?”

“I don’t have a
choice. But I don’t want to leave you and David.  And you’re both in the middle
of the road.”

“Not many people
use this road.  Don’t worry none about that.”

“But Kip. . .”

He weakly opened
his eyes. “Miss Caroline, I don’t think I’m gonna. . .”  He tried to take a
breath, his lip quivering, then managed to whisper.  “Tell Jane I love her.”

“Kip, you can
tell her yourself. I’m going to get you. . .”  His face, his whole body became
limp, his eyes remained open, staring at the now darkening sky. “Kip, please,
please don’t. . .”  She touched the side of his arm, now still, and she knew
that he was gone.

She held her hand
to her mouth. She began to cry, long, loud sobs.

“Caroline, don’t.
. .cry.  I need you to be strong,” she heard through her weeping.

“David!” she
leaned her head inside the carriage door.  “David,  Kip’s. . .dead.”

He whispered,
“You. . .need to get help.”

“I know.  Kip
said there were a few cottages about a mile back.”

“The horses? 
Where are. . .” he mumbled.

“They’re gone. 
They must have gotten loose as a result of the accident.”

“I wish we had
brought Big Red.  He would’ve returned.” His eyes half open, he studied his
wife.  “Your leg’s hurt, Caroline.”

“Yes, I know.”

“You can’t crawl
two miles.”

“I’m going to
endeavor to walk on it.”

At that moment,
Caroline heard whinnying.  “I think I hear one of the horses, David.  Perhaps I
should go and find him.”

“Ah, I know,” he
muttered, “your equestrian prowess will save the day.”

“How can you be
teasing me at a time like this?”

“I. . .” As he
tried to sit more upright, he winced and Caroline, for the first time, saw dark
fluid beneath his jacket.

“David, you’re
bleeding too,” she said softly, her voice shaking.

“It’s nothing,
it’s just. . .” He lifted up his jacket and she gasped when she saw a wound in
his stomach. She started to sob.

“Caroline, don’t.”

“David, please! 
Don’t die! Our children need you! I need you!”

He nodded, then
half-closed his eyes.  “You must. . .get help.” “Yes, yes, I’m going. David,
please hold on.  Please,” she pleaded with him.

He nodded and
raised his arm.  Caroline reached inside the carriage to squeeze his hand.  She
let go, then whispered, “I love you, David.  Please, please don’t leave me.” Though
he didn’t respond, Caroline could see his chest rising and falling.  “Please,
Lord, keep him safe.” All at once, a cold breeze whipped against her and she
began to shiver.  She reached into the carriage and pulled out a blanket.

She took off her
drenched overcoat, then draped a blanket over her shoulders, her wet dress
weighing her small body down.

She slowly
straightened and immediately felt faint. She remained still, placing her hand
on the overturned carriage and steadying herself for a moment. Her eyes were
drawn to Kip’s motionless body, still under the carriage, the dark wetness
underneath him, his open eyes no longer able to see.  Caroline’s heart ached. 
She wished that she had another blanket to lay over Kip. 
Jane is going to
be heartbroken
. “Rest in peace, Kip, and may God have mercy on your soul.”
She bit down on her lip to stop from crying.  She couldn’t think about Kip right
now.  She must focus on getting help for David.  Otherwise. . .well, she
wouldn’t think about the otherwise.

Caroline searched
for the lantern and soon discovered it close to Kip’s body, smashed and what
was left of it, lying on its side. 
Without any light, how shall I find my
way?

Caroline found
that if she moved carefully and avoided putting excessive weight on her injured
leg, it was bearable. Her shoulder was throbbing. 

Perhaps I can
find the horse on the way back to the nearest cottage
.  “Please, Lord, let
David be all right. I will do anything.”  Then she muttered, “Thy will be done;
give me thy grace to endure.”

As Caroline
limped along the road, she tried to stay to the right along the edge of the
forest, although it was becoming difficult to see anything.

Hobbling along
the side of the road, Caroline winced as she scraped her injured leg on a few
bushes jutting out from the forest.  She took a deep breath and continued, her
leg burning with every step.  She fought the impulse to take shelter in the
forest.  Staying on the road with the edge of the trees as her guide seemed to
be her only hope.

Caroline shivered
inside her wet clothes and pulled the blanket closer to her body.  Soon, she
felt wetness on her head. Looking up, she saw that it was now beginning to
snow. Within ten minutes the small white flakes filled the darkness around
her.  The wind now felt like hands holding her back. She leaned forward and
pushed her body against the elements.

*  *  *

David roused as
snow blew into the overturned carriage. He felt weak and dizzy.  The wound in
his stomach stung and he could feel sticky wetness all over his clothes. 
Strangely enough, he wasn’t worried about dying.  He was more concerned for
Caroline.  How would she handle it if he passed away?  His heart ached as he
recalled her pleading with him not to die.

He had no idea
how long she had been gone, but in a blizzard of this sort, it would be nearly
impossible for her to find her way.  He asked his favorite saint, St. Jude, to
help Caroline.  “St. Jude, pray for Caroline, make it possible for her to find
help.”  Then, remembering the plaque in the carriage, he recited the blessing,
“That the Divine Infant will light the road before her. . .whatever it takes,
God, please, please help her.”

Chapter 70

Her teeth
chattering, her body trembling, her arms were wrapped tightly against the cold,
Caroline moved ahead, slowly, painfully.

All of a sudden,
she stumbled into the forest.  The blanket dropped and she slammed hard on her
injured leg. The intense burning pain caused Caroline to lose her breath, and
for a moment, it seemed like she was going to lose consciousness. 
I must
keep going, no matter how much this hurts.

With her hands,
Caroline searched for the blanket and pulled it around her shoulders. She
reached out and held onto the trunk of a tree and forced herself up.  Her leg
blazed.  As she pushed herself up, she realized that, with the darkness, it was
impossible to see the road.

Caroline kept her
arms in front of her and she swung around desperately stretching out her arms
like a blind person.  For several frantic seconds, she waved, each time hitting
a tree or branch and seemingly no closer to the road.

She remained
still for a moment.  A gust of cold air almost knocked her over and she began
to shiver violently.  Her teeth now chattered so much that she was sure they
would break. The cold wind burned her ears. Although she still clung onto the
wool blanket, she realized that it had now become wet.

I can’t do
this.  I’m not going to be able to get help for David
.  She plopped down on
the snow-covered ground and began to sob.

Caroline thought
of her children and her will to live became strong. She would reach into the
deepest recesses of her soul and her body, and strive with every fiber of her
being to make it through this hopeless situation.
St. Jude, pray for me
.
She slowly stood up.

Amidst the
whiteout, she squinted and could see an object shimmering twenty feet in the
distance.  She pushed her way through the wind and snow, following the light as
her guide, until she finally reached a small bell.

She came upon a
clearing of some type, the soft reflection of the metal illuminating several
feet in front of her. It was not only dark, the blowing snow made it impossible
to see. Caroline put her hands out in front of her and, not feeling anything,
continued to walk straight ahead.

Hopelessness
again began to take root in her, and her quivering lips began to cry. She shook
her head as if in answer and she pushed against the wind and bumped into a
wooden post.  A heavy woolen cloak hung from the top of a fence.  She yanked it
down.

Caroline dropped
the wet blanket and gratefully wrapped herself in the over-sized garment.  The
coat was warm and Caroline welcomed the heat.  She inched through the blinding
snow and within a few minutes, bumped into a porch.  “Thank God.”

She reached out
for the railing, then pulled herself up to the small porch.  She banged
frantically on the door until a man opened it.  He was tall and broad-shouldered. 
Perhaps fifteen years older, he had short graying hair. His expression was one
of concern.

“Come in, Miss,
come in and sit by the fire.”

“No, no.”  She
was shivering and was finding it difficult to speak. “We. . . must. . .go to my
husband.  He may die.”

“Just a moment
while I get my coat.”

“Thank you, Mr. .
.”

“Mr. Ferguson,
Jim Ferguson, Ma’am.”

The man held up
the lantern and escorted her to his large barn.  “Give me a minute to hitch up
the horses. The sleigh will be faster. You sit up front and hold the lantern,
Ma’am.”

Caroline got in
and took the light from him.  After hitching up the horses, he slipped in
beside her.  “I must take it slow.”

“Yes, I
understand.”

“You said it was
up the road apiece?”

“Yes, my husband
said the road’s not well-maintained and few people use it, but if someone comes
along, they’ll ride right into the carriage.”

“No worry about
that. Your husband was right that few people use the road. No one would be
riding on it in this storm.”

“My name is Mrs.
Caroline O’Donovan.  I found this coat on your fence back there.”

Mr. Ferguson
shrugged his shoulders.  “Doesn’t look familiar, Mrs. O’Donovan.”