In My Dreams (9 page)

Hell had frozen over and I was lost in its endless labyrinth. I fell more times than I could count, tripping over every single root, or other thing, that stuck out of the frozen ground.

I suddenly felt an extreme sense of déjà vu, like I was re-living a nightmare – the same nightmare I’d had the night before. Could it have been a vision, preparing me for this moment?

If it was then there was hope for me because Michael was also in that dream. But… I was awake now, and the only time I was able to see him was in my dreams. I could only hope, and right now, hope was the only glue holding the pieces of me together.

I kept going as fast as my weak, trembling legs could carry me, trying to stay in as straight a line as I could. I prayed I wasn’t going in circles. The thought of coming out of the woods, finding myself back where I started, terrified me. I knew there wouldn’t be daylight for many more hours. Not during December in Alaska.

Time seemed endless in this hell. I didn’t know what time it was but knew that I had been walking for a long time. I was lost in the Alaskan boonies wondering if I’d ever get out or if anyone would ever find me. I glanced back and saw a dim light waving back and forth between the trees. It was him. He was coming for me. But he was back far enough for now. I couldn’t stop. I had to keep moving.

My body was shivering fiercely, trying to keep itself warm from the bone chilling cold. My face, fingers, and feet felt like they were on fire. My head was throbbing with pain. What I wouldn’t give for an Excedrin, some hot cocoa, and a hot Jacuzzi bath. My socks and pants were soaked from falling countless times onto the frozen ground. My long sleeved shirt and pajama-top barely held in any body heat.

Soon, my legs felt weighted, as if I was carrying another person on my back. I was slowing. I knew what the signs of hypothermia were. It was something I was taught in class while living in Alaska. I was becoming overly exhausted, and felt like giving up.

I heard a rustling in the trees ahead, then, out of the darkness a white wolf appeared in front of me. His sapphire eyes glowed brightly in the darkness. It was the same wolf that was at my house. But how did he get here? I froze in my tracks. He whimpered and then turned, waiting for me to follow. He led me in a slightly different direction, taking me more towards the right. I hoped he wasn’t taking me in a circle.

I followed him for a few hundred yards, as quickly as I could. But he was much too fast for my weary legs, and before I knew it… my furry white angel had disappeared into the darkness, leaving me alone.

“I’m sorry Michael,” I said out loud hoping he could hear me. My words were slow, my tongue felt exhausted and swollen. Fighting the cold and fatigue was like a dwarf fighting a gladiator. It was a definite losing situation.

I was lost in the middle of nowhere. I knew every second was precious but I had to stop and rest. My weary legs wouldn’t allow me to take another step. Even my lungs ached from breathing the frigid air. I pressed my back against a cold tree stump and slid down onto the frozen ground. My breath was shallow.

I sat in silence and heard cracking branches nearby. A black shadow, darker than the night, passed between the trees. It couldn’t be the killer, could it? I saw his light in the distance. I became petrified with thoughts of bears or other carnivorous creatures lurking in the darkness around me. I heard rustling of branches again and saw the dark shadow dart behind some trees ahead of me.

My life flashed before my eyes. Death seemed to be knocking on all my doors, but being eaten wasn’t one I anticipated. I sat still, trying not to breathe. The dream of the dark creature, chasing me through woods like these, flashed through my mind. Was there really a grim reaper? Was he coming for me? There was complete, eerie silence around me, aside from the loud thumping of my heart against my chest.

I decided to coax myself out of going crazy. I needed something, anything to keep me sane.

My eyes are playing tricks on me. I’m showing signs of hypothermia, and hypothermia can cause delirium. The shadows were part of it. There are no creatures lurking around me, and the cracking branches in the trees were cute little squirrels running up and down, having fun.

I laughed silently to myself, which proved I was beginning to lose it.

“Michael, where are you?” Saying his name out loud made me feel better.

I’d always hoped my death would be quick and painless, not one full of pain and lingering misery. I’d heard of people falling asleep out in the frigid temperatures and just not waking up. That seemed like a pretty easy way to die… if it was your time.

I pressed my legs up to my chest and blew into my hands for warmth, but my breath was just as cold as I was.

With every step I knew he was drawing closer - the hunter stalking his prey. If this was the night I was going to die, I would rather die freezing to death than have him find me first. The thought made me utterly sick inside but I was becoming too cold to care.

I’d tried my best to survive; to get as far away as I could, but I was much too weak and my frozen, aching limbs wouldn’t allow me to go any further.

I glanced back and saw the dim light of the hunter’s lantern swinging back and forth through the trees. I prayed he wouldn’t find me. Tortured thoughts ran through my mind, but I couldn’t bring myself to move an inch further. My part of the chase had ended. He was coming… coming steady and unrelenting…coming to kill me.

I tried to steer my thoughts in a more positive direction, pulling out the last memory I had of Michael being alive. He’d driven me down to Eagle River to watch a movie, and then took me to lunch at a Chinese Restaurant that was nearby. He was excited of his secret plans, and anxious to get home and get ready for the night he planned for us. He took me home, gave me a kiss and said goodbye. His kiss was simple, a thoughtful kiss that said I’ll see you soon. I’d waved as he drove down the road and stood there until his car disappeared around the bend. That was the last time I saw him… alive.

I twisted the promise ring Michael had given me on my frozen finger. I was amazed it hadn’t been taken from me. He was probably too wasted to notice, but I was glad no matter what the reason.

I rested my head between my knees, desperately fighting the need to close my eyes, even if for a minute. I knew that if I did, I’d probably fall asleep and wake up dead. I’d fight as long as I had breath left in me, and that wasn’t saying much. I sighed.

“Liz,” a voice called out from the darkness.

My head shot up but I couldn’t see anything through the dense trees. I must have been hearing things. I was steadily becoming delusional and wondered if I’d even seen the white wolf, or if that was a delusion too.

“Liz,” the voice called out again, this time louder.

“Michael?” I called back, but my voice sounded more like a loud whisper.

A small light illuminated through the trees ahead.

A surge of fear shot through me, and for a split second, I stopped breathing. Was it the killer?

The light became brighter, approaching me. It emitted an energy that I could not explain. All I knew was that I was not afraid, and felt a sense of peace within its glow. The light transformed right before my eyes. Then, I saw the most magnificent, the most breathtaking, angelic being walking towards me. His hand was stretched out to me.

“Michael?” The only logical explanation was that I’d fallen asleep, and Michael was here to collect me. I must have been dying.

“Come on babe, you’ve got to get up. You’re so close. I need to get you to the road. You need to get up,” he begged. I tried to reach for him, but my hand went straight through his.

“Michael… Am I dead?” I slurred.

“No, you’re not dead, and you’re not dreaming. I’m really here with you.”

“But how?”

“No time for that now, Liz. Please, you have to get up. You need to get to the road,” he coaxed in a low, serious tone.

“I can’t move, Michael. I’m so cold. I can’t feel anything anymore. I’m dying.” My mind had already given up.

“You’re not going to die, Liz. You’re strong, and right now…you need to stand up.”

“I can’t Michael.”

“Liz, get up,” he said firmly. I knew he was desperate, trying to pull me out of my despondency. “I’ll be with you every step of the way.”

“But, how can I see you if I’m not dreaming?” I said confused.

“It’s one of those things I’ve been learning. Pretty cool, huh?”

I tried to smile but my face was too swollen.

I pulled myself together, trying to pry myself up from the ground, but my frozen limbs weren’t cooperating. It was near impossible to stand.

“Come on, Liz… You can do it,” he urged with a protective edge to his voice. He came close to me, his luminous face inches from mine, luring me to get up. I felt a bit of warmth run through my frozen veins. “Come on, baby. I’m here now. Let’s get up together,” he quietly coached. His hands cupped my face but I couldn’t feel a thing. I ached that I couldn’t feel him. My body yearned to feel his touch and his embrace again, even if only for a few seconds.

I pressed my back up against the tree and fought through the extreme pain and fatigue to get up. I finally stood to my feet.

“I knew you could do it,” he said with a big smile. “Now, we’ve got to get moving.”

I was lightheaded and unsteady but Michael stayed close to me. I focused on him, while he kept a step in front, lighting my path through the trees.

“Your guiding light would have been helpful a lot sooner,” I teased through my teeth. “You wouldn’t believe how many times I fell.”

“Sorry. It took some time to learn how control myself to do this. It takes a lot of energy. My grandparents said that I’m adapting very quickly.”

“Can
he
see you glowing like this, too?”

“Most likely, so we need to keep moving,” he said, turning back and flashing me his crooked grin. It instantly warmed my heart and gave me an extra needed push.

“How long can you stay… glowing like this?” I asked.

“I’m not sure. It will eventually fade but it will depend on how much energy I put out. Right now, I’m running on a low wattage,” he turned and winked.

I was confounded. “Please don’t burn out,” I pleaded. The thought of him leaving me alone in the dark again was horrifying.

“I think I have just enough to take you to the road. It’s not far,” he admitted. “Now stop talking and use whatever energy you have to keep your feet moving.”

I was almost breathless and couldn’t speak much anyway. My legs were on auto-pilot, methodically stepping for their own survival. I found myself instinctively reaching out to grab Michael, but my hand would pass directly through him. He’d just turn and smile but it was that smile that kept me going.

I felt like a frozen zombie, slowly fading in and out of consciousness, but Michael’s voice kept me coherent.

My legs felt hollow, and I was just about to drop, when Michael turned and looked at me with a glimmer in his eyes.

“We’re here Liz. You did it. You made it to the road.”

The blackness was thick and there were no street lights. I could barely see the black paved road. I turned back and saw the flashlight getting closer and could vaguely hear a voice yelling in the distance.

“Come on Liz, just a few more steps! Please, hurry!” he begged. Michael was fading. His light was getting dimmer and I didn’t want him to leave me alone to die alone in the freezing dark with the murderer not far behind. I knew he could see Michael because he was heading in our direction.

Why was Michael leading me to the road? I was easy prey out in the open. But it didn’t matter. I couldn’t travel any further anyway, and I wasn’t going to question him. I made the few more steps and my legs buckled under me. I fell limp to the pavement. Michael knelt by my side, leaning over me. He was quickly diminishing and so was I. From the corner of my eye, I saw a light coming toward us.

He was here. The killer had finally found us and Michael would soon be gone. But I wasn’t scared this time. I was too exhausted to be scared. I just wanted it to be over with... quickly.

“Don’t worry, Liz. You’ll be alright. I promise,” Michael’s sweet voice comforted. I wished I could touch him.

The light was coming fast.

I tried hard to focus on Michael’s face.

“I love you,” he said.

“I love you too,” I whispered.

He closed his eyes and his being lit up the whole area around us like a small atomic bomb. Then, in an instant, he was gone.

My eyes could barely stay open and were blurred but I could swear I saw an angel. A large white wolf appeared out of the darkness and stood between me and the oncoming light. Its sapphire eyes glimmered hope in the darkness. He was protecting, guarding, and shielding me from whatever was coming.

My eyes finally closed. I could no longer keep them open. The wolf howled; his cry pierced through the night air. Then there were screeching of brakes and tires as they skidded to a stop. It was a car. I faintly heard two doors open and slam shut, and then pounding footsteps running towards me.

“Oh my God! It’s Lizzy!” a frantic female voice screamed.

“Quick, clear the back seat,” a male voice demanded.

I was instantly swooped into the comfort of someone’s arms. The heat from their body sent warmth through me. I fought to open my eyes to see my rescuer.

My eyes struggled, trying to focus, and then it became clear.

It was Tyler Cross! With every ounce of energy, I pounded and kicked to be free of him.

“Don’t touch me! Put me down!” I yelled.

“Lizzy… stop! It’s alright. You’re alright,” he said gently.

“You killed him. Michael’s dead because of you!” I screamed, punching his chest, which probably seemed more like a tap. He held me tightly against his body to keep me from moving.

“I’m sorry, Lizzy. I’m so sorry,” he said apologetically. He hugged me tighter to him.

“I hate you!” I tried to yell, but my words came in a whisper.

“Lizzy, he’s here to help,” the female voice called out. It was Emily. I felt her warm hand brush across my forehead. “She needs to get to a hospital now!”