Imperfectly Real (A Series of Imperfections)
Copyright © 2013 by A. E. Woodward
Cover Design by Sarah Hansen, Okay Creations
Editing by Ryn Hughes, Delphi Rose
Interior design by Angela McLaurin, Fictional Formats
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This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
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“Tell your Mommy and Daddy to go get a room,” I cooed. Pausing from my playtime, I lifted my head and smirked playfully at Emma as she and Shane finally broke their embrace. I had to hand it them, they did their best to not overwhelm us with their PDAs, but whenever they did Rob and I seized the opportunity to harass them about it. Of course, Rob was usually a little cruder than I was, but it was all in good fun … for the most part.
I stood from the floor, where I had been laying with Felix. He screeched with delight, but my muscles ached from the thirty-odd minutes I had laid there, just letting him crawl over me. I loved that little guy, and he sure brought a lot of joy into the condo—even if it meant that he somehow simultaneously sucked the life out of it.
Now don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t bitching … at all. Well, maybe just a little bit. Things were definitely different, which was to be expected. You couldn’t throw a kid into a condo with four adults and expect for things to stay the same, obviously. And in the six months that had passed since Felix was born we’d made many memories. It was fun watching him develop into his own little person. He looked so much like Shane it was scary, and from what we could tell his personality was about the same. He was kicked back and easy-going. Seriously, the kid rarely cried. It was almost freaky. But, of course, with those memories came changes as well. Beer was harder to come by and the swear jar that had once overflowed with dollar bills remained empty—replaced by a cussword spelling bee. In fact, we were going to be in serious shit once the kid learned how to spell.
“Seriously, guys, don’t you ever get sick of each other?” I asked, pushing past them to get to the kitchen. I didn’t bother to wait for an answer. What was the point? I knew what they would say. They didn’t, and it was sickening. A good year and a half had passed since the two lovebirds finally figured out they were meant for each other, yet they still acted like lovesick puppy dogs. But that wasn’t really what was eating at me. My anger was being displaced, and I didn’t really know why.
Okay, that was a lie. I knew exactly why I was being a Debbie-Downer.
I opened the fridge and prayed to the good Lord above that there would be some beer stocked. I dug around for a moment before throwing a silent celebration as I grabbed the last one from the door.
Slamming the fridge shut, I turned my attention back to Emma. She must have sensed my tension and, scooping Felix up off the ground, she asked, “What’s your problem? She began swaying back and forth with Felix on her hip. It was a sight that still seemed foreign to me—I just couldn’t get used to seeing her in her new role. There was no doubt that she’d turned out to be a great mother. In fact, she was almost neurotic with her breast-feeding, cloth diapering, and homemade baby food.
“I’m just busting your A-S-S. Relax would you.” I cracked open the beer and took a long haul. The fact of the matter was that I was annoyed at everything. Things weren’t going so great for me. Work sucked as much as ever, despite busting my ass—and kissing everyone else’s—and I was just as broke as I had been eight years ago. There seemed to be no hope for me to ever further my career. Then, adding insult to injury, I couldn’t seem to find a girl that didn’t drive me nuts. Don’t get me wrong, I had no problems finding someone who would be willing for a good romp, but they always annoyed the shit out of me and I was ready for them to leave as soon as we finished. It would seem I’d peaked years ago, because it had been downhill from there.
I felt Shane and Emma’s eyes burning on me as I took long silent hauls off my beer. “Want to head down to grab a couple beers at McFadden’s?” Shane finally questioned, sensing that there must be a reason for my frustration.
Before I could muster an answer, Emma threw her two cents in. “That would be nice,” she added. “Felix and I could use some alone time, couldn’t we?” I watched as she smothered the baby in kisses while continuing to talk to him in her annoying baby voice.
I rolled my eyes before sharing a look with Shane, who also seemed to be looking for an escape from reality for a bit. I took it as my cue and downed the remainder of my beer then nodded towards the door. Shane was immediately on board, and quickly gave Emma and Felix goodbye kisses on their foreheads.
“Rob’s gonna be pissed he missed a night out,” I said. He was always razzing us to go out but none of us could seem to find the gumption to go, so he usually went out alone. I wasn’t even sure where he was—probably working, or out chasing some tail.
“He’ll get over it. You ready, buddy?” he asked before Emma could change her mind. She did that a lot lately, but Shane blamed it on the hormones.
I tossed my bottle into the recycle bin and quickly booked it for the door. I felt suffocated but although I knew I was being dramatic—hell I was annoying myself—life was beyond stressful as of late, and I had no way to release my tensions.
Shane closed the door behind us and struggled to keep up with my fast pace. “What the hell is your issue?” he called from behind me.
“I don’t have an issue,” I sighed before starting down the stairs. Truth was, it was just so stifling in that condo these days. I needed to get back to myself.
“You’re a fuckin’ terrible liar.”
Of course Shane would be the one to call me out. He refused to let anyone wallow in self-pity. Even though he was a pro at it, it didn’t mean he would let anyone else enjoy a good pity party. I really didn’t feel like talking but I knew that he wouldn’t leave me alone until I just came out with it.
I sighed in defeat. “I guess I’m restless, that’s all. I’m just so fuckin’ tired of maintaining status quo,” I grumbled, pushing out the front of our building and turning the corner toward McFadden’s. “My job sucks, I can barely afford to pay my bills, you and Emma have each other, and Rob’s always gone, chasing some tail … then there’s me. Poor Tyler, the third wheel. Always the bridesmaid, never the bride.” I laughed in spite of myself. That was pretty funny.
Shane scoffed in response. “Well, where did all that come from?” he questioned.
I shrugged my shoulders. “Just how I feel.”
“Dude is this about Em and I? Because we can be more thoughtful if it really bothers you—”
“No,” I cut him off. Of course he would think it was about them, what with my little ‘woe is me’ session coinciding with their canoodling. “It really has nothing to do with you guys.” That was the truth—there was no jealousy on my part. Once we got back from Vegas I’d spent hours with Shane making that perfectly clear. There were no hard feelings about my past with Emma, and it was all water under the bridge. “You’re great and I’m happy for you both. It’s just got everything to do with me. I don’t even know why the fuck I’m here.”
Turning the corner I noticed there wasn’t a line at McFadden’s. I breathed a sigh of relief knowing that we could get right in and that I wouldn’t have to deal with a bunch of people. Shane muttered a pleasantry to the bouncer as we walked past and into the bar. It was pretty desolate, even for a Tuesday.
