Imagination According to Humphrey (8 page)

I crossed my toes and hoped my Plan would work.

I don't know how long it takes to eat pizza, but I took a chance and jiggled the lock-that-doesn't-lock on my cage.

The table my cage was on had a smooth leg to slide down. I scurried over to the dollhouse and went into the living room.

I looked at the TV, trying to imagine what it would be like to live in a hamster-sized house with my own television. Is there a hamster channel
?

This time, I tried the little chair, but it was too small—even for a hamster.

Then I darted into the kitchen, hoping for some more fried chicken and mashed potatoes. I opened the little fridge, but there was nothing inside.

I climbed the stairs and entered the second bedroom. I'd missed that the first time.

It had windows that went to the floor and they opened onto a little balcony.

It was fun to stand there, but then I had to check out the bed.

Ahhh. It was such a nice bed with four tall columns and a little cover over the top. It was almost as if it had been made for me.

I lay down and thought about how soft it was. And how cozy it was.

And then . . . I think maybe I dozed off!

The next thing I knew, Sophie was standing by my cage with a piece of pizza in one hand. It smelled hamster-licious!

“Hi, Humphrey,” she said. “I'm sorry you can't eat pizza, because it's delicious. But Timothy started screaming and Mom and Dad both left the room. They haven't come back yet, so I thought I'd talk to you.”

She sat down on her bed and stared into my cage. “It was nice for a while,” she said in a soft voice.

I didn't squeak a word because
I wasn't in my cage!
I hoped this risk was worth it.

Suddenly Sophie said, “Humphrey
?
Where are you
?
Are you playing hide-and-seek
?
”

Again, I didn't answer. So she stood up and opened the cage door.

(I'd closed it behind me, so she had no idea I wasn't there.)

Sophie poked around in my bedding. Then she peeked into my sleeping hut.

“Humphrey
?
HUMPHREY!” she cried.

I didn't move a muscle.

She raced to the door. “Humphrey's gone!” she wailed.

(I could tell that she and Timothy were related, but Sophie was even louder.)

“Help me!” she cried.

In seconds, Mr. and Mrs. Kaminski appeared.

“What's wrong
?
Are you all right
?
” Sophie's father asked.

Sophie started crying. “Humphrey's . . . not . . . in . . . his . . . cage!” she said between sobs. “He's gone!”

Mr. Kaminski rushed to my cage and started feeling around in the bedding. “Where could he be
?
” he asked. “Was the cage door open
?
”

“Nooooo,” Sophie cried. “It was closed!”

I hated to see her cry, but at least she and her parents were in the same room.

Mr. Kaminski looked up from my cage. “He's not here.”

“He must be here somewhere,” Sophie's mom said. “Let's look around.”

So the family looked up and down, high and low . . . but it was a LONG-LONG-LONG time before they looked in the dollhouse.

“He's gone! Humphrey's gone!” Sophie howled. “And it's all my fault! Everyone in class will be mad at me! Even Mrs. Brisbane!”

Her father tried to calm her down.

Between her tears, Sophie explained that after she'd put me in the dollhouse and I'd gone in the kitchen, the bathtub and the bed, she'd closed the cage door so carefully.

Mrs. Kaminski came over to the little house, leaned down—and that was it! She started to laugh. I hadn't heard her laugh before.

“Humphrey's having a nice little nap right here,” she said. “Come on, Sophie. Look in the bed.”

Sophie rushed over and her wails turned to giggles.

“Oh, Humphrey!” she said. “I thought you'd run away. Everyone in Room Twenty-six would be upset. And I'd be upset!”

She started to cry again.

“It's all right.” Her dad patted her shoulder.

“How did he get out
?
” she asked.

“I've heard hamsters are pretty good at escaping their cages,” Mr. Kaminski said.

He was right about that!

Sophie picked me up and then it happened.

“Waaah! Waaah! WAAAH!”

“I'll get him,” Mrs. Kaminski said.

“Let him cry for a bit,” Mr. Kaminski said.

“I think I should check on him,” Sophie's mom said, heading toward the door.

“All you care about is Timothy! You don't ever want to talk to me! You don't even care about Humphrey!” she cried.

Sophie had me cupped in her hand, but I could see the look on her mother's face.

“Oh, Sophie! You know how much we love you!” she said.

“You're our first baby,” her dad said. “And we couldn't love you more!”

They both hugged Sophie while Timothy screamed in the background.

“Timothy's having some problems,” Mrs. Kaminski said. “But he'll be better soon.”

“I'll go get him,” Mr. Kaminski said.

Sophie's mom smiled. “I have a better idea. Sophie, why don't you get Timothy and bring him here
?
After all, you're his big sister. You know how to pick him up carefully.”

Sophie wiped away her tears. “All right.”

Mr. Kaminski gently put me back in my cage and closed the door. He checked the lock and said, “It's latched tightly.”

Humans always think that, thank goodness.

Sophie returned a minute later, carrying the crying blanket. At least the crying was softer now.

“Look, Timothy,” she said. “This is Humphrey the hamster.” She walked over to the cage and held the blanket up.

I thought quickly and hopped on my wheel. “Hi, Timothy,” I squeaked. “Watch me spin on my wheel!”

And then, the most amazing thing happened. Timothy stopped crying and stared at me, so I kept spinning.

“Isn't he cute, Timothy
?
” Sophie asked.

Timothy actually smiled!

“Look, Humphrey! He likes you!” Sophie said.

Mr. and Mrs. Kaminski began to laugh.

“Goo,” Timothy said.

I'm not sure what that meant, but I'm pretty sure it meant he liked me.

“GOO-GOO-GOO!” I squeaked. Timothy giggled.

“That's his first laugh in days,” his mom said. “He must be feeling better!”

I was feeling better, too. Being caught out of my cage was risky, but I was HAPPY-HAPPY-HAPPY to help the Kaminskis get together—even Timothy.

I finally got tired of spinning and climbed up my ladder.

Sophie handed Timothy to her dad and they all sat on the bed, next to my cage.

“I'm so sorry I haven't had time for you,” her mom said. “Timothy is so lucky to have you as a sister.”

“We're all lucky to have Sophie,” her dad said.

“YES-YES-YES!” I squeaked and they all laughed.

“GOO-GOO-GOO!” Timothy gurgled and everyone laughed again.

“How did your homework go
?
” Mr. Kaminski asked.

Sophie read them her paragraph about the Island of the Parrots and they loved it.

“You know, we
are
a family,” Sophie's mother said. “Let's start acting like one.”

Then they talked about setting up a schedule where they'd have time to listen to Sophie and time for Timothy and time for Mr. Kaminski's reports.

They kept talking, but I didn't hear it all.

I'd done everything I could do as a classroom pet.

But to squeak the truth—I needed some rest!

MY WRITER'S RAMBLINGS
It isn't always easy
to be a classroom pet.
But what I did at Sophie's house
may be my best trick yet!

Pearl

I
was happy to get back to Room 26 on Monday and even happier to know that I'd helped Sophie out. I always like to lend a helping paw.

Mrs. Brisbane asked how the weekend had gone.

“Oh, it was wonderful,” Sophie said. “You should have seen Humphrey in my dollhouse! He got in the tub and on the bed, just like it was his own little house.”

It would have been nice to have a real house, but I was happy to be in my cage and back in Room 26.

I had my schedule for Monday all worked out: Math, nap, language arts, nap, lunch, nap, recess, nap, science, reading and NAP! I even dozed while my friends came into Room 26 that morning.

But my schedule didn't work out, because Mrs. Brisbane started the day with the announcement that we had a special guest.

I raced to the front of my cage, but all I saw were my usual Room 26 classmates.

“Nicole, would you like to introduce our guest
?
” Mrs. Brisbane asked.

“Now
?
” Nicole said.

Mrs. Brisbane nodded. “I'll get her.”

She disappeared into the cloakroom and then came out carrying a large tank.

“This is Pearl,” Nicole said. “Mrs. Brisbane said I could bring her so you'd see what a real dragon looks like.”

There was quite a bit of commotion among my friends, as you can imagine!

“I'll put Pearl's cage on the table next to Humphrey,” Mrs. Brisbane said. “Then everybody can come up and take a look at her.”

“Eeek!” I squeaked. “Can't you put her somewhere else
?
”

Mrs. Brisbane was already walking over to our table. “I'll put her right between Humphrey and Og so they can both see her,” she said.

I was curious about Pearl, but I wasn't sure whether I really wanted to meet a dragon.

And when I could actually see her, I was
certain
I didn't want to meet a dragon. My whiskers wiggled and my tail twitched, but I couldn't squeak a word.

Pearl was small for a dragon but huge compared to me.

Her head was shaped like a triangle with sharp spikes on the sides. She had a long tail with more spikes, large, ugly claws, and she was all kinds of colors, from green to pink.

She looked right at me and stuck out her tongue, which is REALLY-REALLY-REALLY rude!

“She's so pretty!” Kelsey said.

Maybe Kelsey needed glasses.

I don't think Og liked Pearl, either. He started hopping around his tank and twanging, “BOING-BOING-BOING!”

I climbed up to the tippy top of my cage so I could get a better look.

“BOING-BOING-BOING-BOING!” Og continued.

Then, Pearl
hissed.
Even over all of Og's noise, I could hear her.

“Hisssssss!”

I didn't think that was a friendly thing to do, since Og and I live in Room 26 and she was just a visitor. But I kept quiet. I didn't want her to hiss at me.

Meanwhile, my classmates pointed and pushed and tried to get a better look at Pearl.

“She looks like a dinosaur,” Sophie said.

“She looks like a dragon,” Harry said.

“She's actually a reptile,” Nicole explained.

“Wow!” Thomas said. “We have a reptile, a rodent and an amphibian in our class—and we're all mammals!”

Mrs. Brisbane laughed. “Very good, Thomas. But now you need to return to your seats and begin class.”

My friends all moved to their desks.

Pearl stayed right where she was.

“Hi, Pearl,” I squeaked, though my voice was shaky. “I'm Humphrey. Welcome to Room Twenty-six.”

Pearl turned her head a little. “Hissssss!”

No manners at all! The dragon in the book was much nicer!

“BOING-BOING-BOING!” Og was so excited, he did a high dive into the water side of his tank.

I swallowed hard. If Pearl was going to be next to me all day, I REALLY-REALLY-REALLY wanted to make friends with her. At least I didn't want to be her enemy!

I tried to be calm as I looked over at her tank. It had rocks, leaves, a water dish—even a thermometer, which was something Og and I don't have.

“Nice tank!” I squeaked.

Pearl turned her head from side to side and then she did it again!

“Hissssssss!” she said.

I was pretty sure Pearl didn't like me.

How could anybody dislike a friendly classroom pet like me
?

I guess Og was on my side, because he left the water side of his tank and said, “BOING-BOING-SCREEE!”

“SCREEE” is a sound he makes only when he thinks there's danger around.

“Calm down,” I told him. “Maybe she's scared of
us
!”

I guess Og had never thought of that, because he was quiet for a long time.

“Let's listen to Mrs. Brisbane,” I said. “She's our friend.”

Pearl, Og and I were totally silent for a while.

There wasn't a squeak, a BOING,
or
a hiss, which was good, because Mrs. Brisbane had something important to say.

“You've written a couple of paragraphs about what you'd do if you could fly,” she said. “And you're doing a good job. Now I want you to turn your ideas into a story. Instead of writing about what you would do if you could fly, I'd like you to take those same ideas and write a story as if you already
can
fly.”

My friends looked as puzzled as I was.

“Instead of saying, ‘If I could fly like a bumblebee, I'd fly to the top of a mountain,' write it as if you
are
a bumblebee and describe what the world looks like through your eyes,” she said. “In other words, turn it into fiction.”

My friends looked unsqueakably puzzled, but Mrs. Brisbane helped them, one by one.

During recess, Pearl, Og and I stayed on our best behavior. I was beginning to think dragons weren't so bad, after all.

But I changed my mind later in the day, when my friends were at lunch.

I decided to take a chance and get a closer look at Pearl.

I jiggled my lock-that-doesn't-lock and the cage door opened. I quietly tiptoed over to Pearl's tank.

To squeak the truth, up close, she was even larger and more terrifying than I'd thought. Those spines looked sharp and she had a large tongue, which she stuck out at me . . . again!

I'm pretty brave for a small creature, so I crossed my toes for luck and tiptoed closer. (But I wished I had a magic shield, like Gil Goodfriend.)

“Welcome to Room Twenty-six, Pearl,” I said. “We're so happy to have you . . .”

Pearl's neck puffed up and she said, “Hissssss” even louder than before!

I backed up all the way to my cage.

“Never mind!” I squeaked as I pulled the door behind me.

At the end of the day, Mrs. Brisbane read us the last chapter of the dragon book by Cameron Cole.

It was SAD-SAD-SAD when Gil Goodfriend said good-bye to Goldie and the other dragons. But when Gil got home, everyone in Bumpshire celebrated with a parade and a town picnic.

I looked over at Pearl and saw her tail twitching.

At the end of the book, there was a hint that Gil and the dragon would meet again, which made me very happy.

But if Goldie had been as unfriendly as Pearl, I wouldn't have liked the book so much!

I was so happy when Nicole's mom came and took that tank away.

“Good-bye, Pearl! Come see us again!” I squeaked.

But when she was gone, I added, “But not for a LONG-LONG-LONG time!”

I was tired that night, but after Aldo left, I opened my cage door again and hurried over to Og's tank.

“What do you think of Pearl
?
” I asked Og.

He didn't say a thing for a moment. Then he started hopping up and down, up and down. “BOING-BOING-BOING!” he said.

“I agree,” I told him. “She wasn't polite with all that hissing. I still think she was a little afraid of us. She's probably never seen a frog or a hamster before.”

Og turned his head left. Then he turned his head right.

I imagine he was thinking.

“BOING!” he shouted. He sounded cheerful.

“Think of it, Og,” I answered. “A dragon was afraid of us! Or maybe she was a little jealous because we get to be classroom pets and she doesn't.”

For a second, I was sorry for Pearl. But that didn't last long.

I still had work to do, so I went back to my cage and grabbed my little notebook.

Despite the fact that I was tired, I knew I was behind the rest of the class and I had to catch up! I looked at my list of things I'd like to do.

— 
Help Holly visit Phoebe

— 
Help Mrs. Brisbane visit her son Jason in Japan

— 
Help Joey see more of his dad

— 
Help Cassie go to the ocean

— 
Help Sophie go to the parrot island

— 
Help Simon go to Italy

— 
Help Kelsey go to the ballet

— 
Help Daniel meet D. D. Denby