Illusions of Love (40 page)

He couldn’t say anything.
 
He’d been stupid to think this could have been kept a secret, especially from
India
.
 
He just hoped that Vince wasn’t quite so inquisitive.

‘Kenny?
 
Oh, God, you did, didn’t you?
 
You slept with her!’

‘It was a mistake,
India
…’

‘You’re telling
me
it was a mistake!
 
Jesus, if Vince finds out…’

‘He doesn’t need to know,
India
.’

‘Too fucking right he doesn’t!
 
This could ruin everything for Charley, more than any newspaper exposé could.
 
What in the world was she playing at?
 
What were you
both
playing at?
 
No, don’t answer that.
 
I really don’t want to know.’

‘It was just a distraction, that’s all.’

‘That’s
all
?
 
A dis
traction
?’

‘She needed to forget for a little while, forget everything that was going on… and so did I.’

‘So did
you
?
 
What the hell were
you
trying to forget?’

He looked at her, his dark eyes boring right into hers.
 
‘You.’

She couldn’t say anything for a second.
 
It suddenly felt as though history was repeating itself from all angles and if she opened her mouth she couldn’t promise she wouldn’t say something she’d regret.

Kenny stood up, sighing heavily as he pushed his hands through his hair.
 
‘I’m sorry.
 
I shouldn’t have said that.’

‘No.
 
Maybe you shouldn’t.’
 
She looked up at him.
 
‘And maybe we shouldn’t have come here.
 
If I’d thought for one minute you still felt…’
 
She trailed off, staring out into the distance, the beach now dark and eerie as night descended, casting its shadows over the tranquil setting, making everything feel slightly more oppressive than it had been before.
 
‘I still need you, Kenny.
 
I’ll always need you.
 
Always, but…’

He sat back down beside her, both of them now staring into the darkness.

‘And I’ll always
be
there,
India
.
 
I will
always
be there, no matter what.
 
I’ve told you that all along, and I’ve always meant it.’

‘It isn’t fair on you though, is it?
 
Me asking you to drop everything every time I mess things up, which, let’s be honest, is frequently.
 
It isn’t fair.
 
And I’m sorry I judged you… What happened with Charley… I had no right, not really.
 
Considering the things
I’ve
done over the years.
 
It’s just that, she went through so much crap because of her past, and Vince was the one who really helped her to move on, y’know?
 
To finally see that she could have a future worth carrying on for.
 
They’re so perfect together, and I just don’t want her to lose that.
 
Because I’m frightened that, if she does, she’ll go back to everything that was bad for her, Kenny.
 
That’s what scares me.’

‘She’s not stupid,
India
.
 
She knows the pitfalls, she… It was wrong, an out-of-character mistake, and it won’t happen again.
 
That situation, it made us act crazy.
 
It meant nothing.
 
She loves Vince, believe me.
 
She loves him so much.’

India
lay back on the decking, exhaustion suddenly washing over her like a blanket of tiredness as she stared up at the stars twinkling above her in the clear black sky.

‘Jesus, between the two of us me and Charley are giving the media one hell of a lot to work with right now.
 
They must think all their Christmases have come at once.’

Kenny lay down beside her, clasping his hands over his chest as he too stared up at the stars.
 
‘How do you feel about going back to Vegas tomorrow?’

She shrugged, her eyes following a shooting star as it flew across the sky, almost as if it had been fired from some kind of intergalactic catapult.
 
‘It’s just something I have to deal with.’

‘You want to see Dominic again though, don’t you?’

She didn’t reply, her eyes still following the star, a ridiculously anxious feeling shooting across her chest as it disappeared from view.

‘You’ve missed him, haven’t you?’

She felt tears start to prick the back of her eyes and she closed them tightly, trying to stop the tears from falling.
 
This was crazy!
 
She hadn’t missed him, she hated him.
 
He’d used her in some stupid game against Michael and she’d let herself fall for him, but she had to be strong now.
 
She had to be.

‘
India
, look at me.
 
Come on.’

She opened her eyes and turned her head to look at Kenny, who was smiling that smile that always made her smile back, no matter how bad she was feeling.

‘You can tell me, y’know.
 
You can tell me anything.’

‘I know,’ she whispered, taking the hand he held out for her, the touch of his fingers wrapping around hers making her feel safe and warm, and happy.
 
Kenny always made her feel happy.
 
Maybe that’s why she needed him around so much because, when he wasn’t around, that’s when she messed up.
 
‘And, yeah.
 
I miss him.
 
Okay?
 
I miss him.
 
Or I miss what I thought we had, I’m not really sure…’

Kenny squeezed her hand again, both of them staring into the other’s eyes, so many silent messages passing between them it made
India
feel dizzy.
 
But she was tired, emotionally drained.
 
She needed to sleep.
 
Finding out about Charley and Jimmy Cash, that had all but finished her off.
 
She just wanted to get into bed and get a good night’s sleep before she flew back to Vegas in the morning.

‘Are you coming back with me, Kenny?
 
To Vegas?’

He smiled again, his fingers curling tighter around hers.
 
‘Yeah.
 
Of course I am.
 
Just try and stop me.
 
I need to be there for my favourite girl, don’t I?
 
Make sure she’s alright.’

She reached out with her other hand and gently stroked his cheek, running her fingers over his mouth, his bearded chin, all the time still staring into his eyes.
 
‘Yeah, you do.
 
Because I don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t around.’

‘You’d survive,’ he smiled, unable to take his eyes off her.
 

‘Maybe,’ she whispered, the air now heavy with an atmosphere that hadn’t been there before, and
India
knew it was the right moment to call time on this, before it led to something it shouldn’t.
 

She let go of him, pulling herself up and dusting herself down and he stood up too, quickly grabbing her hand before she could disappear back inside.

‘I meant it,
India
.
 
What I said.’

She didn’t pull away, she just looked back into those dark and beautiful eyes, loving him so much in a way she just couldn’t explain, and that had been the problem for almost two decades now.
 
When it came to Kenny, she couldn’t really explain much.

‘I will
always
be there for you, baby.
 
No matter what.’

And, as she smiled again, looking deep into the only eyes she could ever really trust, she knew for sure that Kenny Ross had been the one constant thing in her life for nearly twenty years, and that was never going to change.
 
Ever.

CHAPTER 25

Jimmy was all too aware that Vince Maine was just one step away from making sure no more of Charley’s movies could be distributed via the website.
 
He wasn’t stupid.
 
Of course her husband was going to be there to sort everything out, to make sure his Beverly Hills housewife tried to keep as much of her now-tarnished reputation as intact as possible.
 
Damage limitation, isn’t that what they called it?

Jimmy had been expecting it.
 
But
he
had lawyers too, good lawyers, but lawyers that maybe worked just that little bit outside of the box, bucked the system, listened to others besides those that made the rules.
 
So he had back-up plans.
 
Didn’t he always?
 
He was prepared for anything.

No, Jimmy knew that the website was only ever going to be a stop gap, a temporary measure, a fleeting glimpse into Charley Maine’s past – a chance for those who’d previously had no idea who or what Charley had been to learn about their neighbour, to find out what that mom at the school gates, who’d seemed just like any other ordinary rich Beverly Hills housewife, had once been a part of.

He had other irons in the fire.
 
He had an underground distribution service already in action, ready to make sure that anyone who wanted a slice of Charley
Maine
’s past could have one, for just a handful of dollars, and already the orders were flooding in because, at her peak, Charley
Maine
had been Queen of the hard-core porn scene.
 
And now a whole lot of people wanted to see why.

When she’d married Vince Maine, Jimmy also knew that her new husband had made sure that as much of Charley’s past life as possible was put to rest.
 
Vince knew people, he was a powerful man, especially here in
Las Vegas
, so he’d made sure Charley’s new life could take off without her feeling any kind of threat of the past returning.
 
And he’d succeeded.
 
For a while.
 
But Jimmy was back now, he was back and things were changing, because
he
knew people too.
 
He was also a powerful man, just in very different ways.

He’d managed to resurrect Charley’s past and bring everything back to the surface, and this time Vince Maine’s job of protecting his wife was going to be a whole lot harder.
 
Jimmy Cash was back.
 
And he had no intention of going anywhere anytime soon.

***

Michael watched from the side of the set, half his attention on everything he had to sort out before they could start shooting anything, and half of it on the fact
India
was due on set any second.

The last time they’d spoken hadn’t exactly left them on good terms, but he was sure he could turn that around.
 
He knew that she hadn’t been in contact with Dominic at all over the past few days because he hadn’t followed her to
L.A.
, as Michael had thought he would.
 
So maybe he’d finally got the message.
 
When it came to
India
you couldn’t win against Michael.
 
It would never happen, Michael wouldn’t let it.
 
Maybe Dominic was finally starting to realise that.

Dominic MacDonald – his son.
 
Michael still couldn’t get his head around it.
 
He had a thirty-six-year-old son and he’d had no idea.
 
His whole relationship with Dominic’s mother was a blur if Michael was honest.
 
It had happened during a time when he’d been struggling, when alcohol and recreational drugs had been his best friend; a time when he’d let very few people in.
 
He’d have made a crap father if the relationship had lasted, but that was no excuse.
 
Maybe knowing Dominic would have changed all of that, who knew?
 
Who knew what might have happened if things had been different.

But things weren’t different, and that’s what he had to deal with.
 
The present, not the past.
 
And if
India
hadn’t responded to any attempt Dominic had made to contact her then surely that was a good sign?
 
She knew Dominic had used her, because that’s exactly what he’d done.
 
Used her as some kind of pawn in some kind of game, a game of one-upmanship against a man who never lost.
 
His son wasn’t quite as clever as
he
was, nor would he ever be.
 
And it seemed
India
had learnt that.