Ignite (Firefighters of Montana Book 3) (9 page)

“This is insane,” he breathed.

Honestly, something about him thinking this was as crazy as she did was comforting. They didn’t even know each other and she knew this sort of thing happened to other people. People who were not her. “Yes, it is.” Because she couldn’t possibly disagree.

His blue eyes blazed into hers. “Does that mean you want to stop?”

Stop? She’d never been insane in her life, she was going to relish in it. “I’ll tell you if I want to stop.”

He grinned. “You have no idea how much I’m appreciating that ‘if’ right now.”

“Just kiss me again,” she said, breathless and desperate and nearly giddy with both of those non-Lina-like things.

“Oh, I’m going to kiss you,” he said, his grin arrogant, his tone certain. He dropped his mouth—not to hers, but to the skin right above her belly button.

She made a sound, but she couldn’t even describe it. It was certainly not a sound she’d ever made before. No man had ever kissed her mouth let alone her belly button. No man had touched her bare waist before, let alone drawn his tongue in lazy circles up the length of her stomach.

She had certainly been missing out.

When he reached the curve of her breast, his fingers were suddenly at her back and unclasping her bra. She had the fleeting thought to stop him. Because how could she let him see her breasts? How could she let this stranger touch her this way? Except she was. And she was enjoying it. So if she was enjoying it, why was she going to stop?

She felt her clasp undo and slowly Ace pulled the straps from her shoulders. How had she gone from the nervous, little girl, afraid to step into a smokejumper bar, to a woman, shirtless on her own couch with a man she barely knew shirtless at her feet?

At her feet. As though she was worth some kind of worship.

This was all some kind of amazing dream. It had to be.

His rough hands touched her everywhere she was bare. It was almost unbearable how gentle, how meaningful it seemed to feel.

“Damn, Lina. What…” He let out a strange kind of laugh. “I don’t know what you’re doing to me.”

“What I’m doing to you?” she repeated, confused that he’d stopped, confused by his words.

His blue eyes slowly rose to hers. There was a seriousness in them that scared her. More than the prospect of sleeping with a stranger, more than the prospect of just about anything of this evening, the intensity on his face scared the living shit out of her.

She started to squirm and look away, but his mouth closed over her breast and the sharp burst of pleasure, the surprising heat as he glided his tongue against her nipple eradicated whatever fear or concern had been building.

This was too much to be afraid of, too good. Something was building inside of her, and she had a bad feeling it was desire. The kind of desire that could only be assuaged by an orgasm. She wasn’t so repressed she’d never given herself one of those. But giving herself one, and someone else giving her one, seemed very, very, very different.

“I should go,” he all but growled against the valley between her breasts.

“What?” she squeaked. Go? He was just getting started! Or in the middle or something. How could he want to go?

“Lina, this is…this is… Hell, this is too much. This is…” He laughed, his mouth now nowhere near hers, his fingers raking through his dark hair, though he still kneeled in front of her. “I’ve never felt like this.”

“That sounds like a line,” she managed to say, though she’d never felt like it either. But she was a virgin. He was a hot, arrogant smokejumper who looked like a model. Surely he’d…done all this before.

His gaze met hers and again there was an intensity that caused her to shiver in fear and lust and something else she didn’t know how to analyze. And she
always
knew how to analyze.

“I know it sounds like one, but I… This…” He shook his head. “Too much,” he muttered, like he was just as confused and torn as she was. “It’s too much and you… You said that you’re inexperienced.” He handed over her shirt and she scowled at it.

“I’m also very good at knowing what I want.”

His mouth curved in that cocky flash of a grin that made her stomach do cartwheels. “Oh, I just bet you are.” But he didn’t kiss her again, or touch her again. “You have to work tomorrow?”

The question made no sense, but she shook her head no, finally taking the shirt when he jabbed it at her again.

“Well, doc, since you’re the reason
I
can’t work tomorrow, you owe me some entertainment.”

“E-Entertainment?” she stammered, feeling off center and confused and…well, irritated he was doing a whole lot more talking than kissing. She didn’t put her shirt on, just held it in front of her.

“Yes, entertainment. You’re going to have to keep me company since I can’t do my job. So, I’ll pick you up about nine.”

“Nine?” What on earth was he talking about?

“Yes. Nine in the morning. Wear shoes fit for hiking and eat a good breakfast.” He got to his feet and grabbed his own shirt, pulling it over his head.

“What are you talking about?” she demanded irritably.

“I’m going to take you on a hike that will give you a beautiful view. I’m going to pack a picnic. I am going to give you your perfect day. And then… If after all of that you still want this… Then we’ll come back here.”

“And if I don’t?” she grumbled, disliking the high-handed way he was taking control of things.

“I’ll take you home. And we’ll go our separate ways.”

“That seems very…rational.” Time to think. Time to regain her senses.
Boo.

“Yes, I’m very proud of myself. I’ve never been very good at being rational.”

“It’s all I’ve ever been,” she muttered sullenly.

He came closer again, leaned down so he could trace her cheek with his finger. Something that was becoming like a habit even if they’d only spent a couple hours in each other’s company. “Oh, honey, that was not true tonight.”

She could only stare at him and think about how he was right. She hadn’t done anything remotely rational tonight—from the beginning.

She smiled up at him. “I kinda like it.”

He chuckled, dropping his hand and stepping away again. “Bring that attitude tomorrow.” He stood for a second, his intense blue eyes all but boring into her.

She swallowed. She could all but see the fight in his face. He wanted to stay. He wanted
her
. Could that really be?

“So, I’ll be back at nine.” Then he was striding to toward the door as if… Part of her thought he couldn’t get away fast enough, but part of her wondered…if he was walking away to keep himself from wanting to stay.

The door swung open and he gave her one last backward glance, muttered something under his breath that sounded like a swear, and then he left and closed the door behind him.

She sat on a couch holding her shirt to her naked chest wondering if she’d just experienced some kind of fugue state. But her nipples were still painfully erect and her heart was still pounding crazily in her chest and…

And she was ridiculously excited for nine tomorrow.

*

Ace drove back
to his hole of an apartment far closer to the forestry base than it was to Kalispell. He’d lost his mind. The problem was, he didn’t know which was more mind lost—leaving her or the fact he’d made a date with her tomorrow. Or was it that he couldn’t believe he’d said he’d never felt this before?

He was a tool. Entirely. And overwhelmingly, blindingly, obsessively, intrigued by her.

He knew better than to get attached. He knew better than to let things become
things
. He knew better than this, and yet something about Lina undid all of that knowledge and all of the certainty and all of the… History. She made him feel like he could be a new man. That he could be the Ace he’d created out of thin air and determination to be something and someone else.

So, yeah, he’d give her the hike. He’d give her that perfect day. Maybe for the next week he’d let himself be ridiculously, hopelessly head over heels for this woman he barely knew. Because once he was cleared to jump again, she’d fade away just like the rest of them.

If her job didn’t make her fade away first.

So, it was fine. Everything regarding what he was doing with Lina was one hundred percent fine.

He drove through a sparkling, Montana night, and tried to work through the strange things going on inside of him. He wasn’t a particularly reflective guy, because that lent itself to all sorts of…regret.

But the past few hours had completely, insanely gotten away from him. He’d never in his life behaved in such a nonsensical way. Sure, his foster parents had sometimes found him puzzling, but he’d had his own reason for acting like he did. Usually being too comfortable, or knowing they were about to send him away anyway.

But from the moment he’d left the bar with Lina, his actions had made zero sense. Except walking away before they’d gone any farther. That had been the best sense he’d employed in a lifetime.

Frustrated with the irritating circular avenue of his thoughts, Ace pulled over to the side of the road. It wasn’t a busy one-lane highway, and he’d probably see maybe one truck pass even if he sat here all night.

He didn’t need to sit here all night. He just needed a little bit of quiet time outside. The clear air he’d always loved, delivering oxygen and hopefully sense to his brain. He needed to be somewhere without walls and a ceiling and to soak up the dazzling sky above him.

He got out of the truck, walked back to the bed and scooted himself onto the edge. He lay back, staring at the velvet dark above him. The crescent moon shone like the beacon he’d always imagined it was, leading him somewhere.

There had been nights when he’d run away that he’d spent dreaming under the moon and stars. Dreaming of a different life. A different person. Ace, the son of a mechanic and a cafeteria worker. A simple childhood in Oregon with a normal, modest family. That was all he’d wanted. Nothing extravagant, nothing over the top or out of reach. He’d just wanted normal. He’d just wanted parents who loved him.

He knew he was lucky because he’d had Jess. She had loved him more than he deserved. She’d tried to protect him, always—whether from Dad’s fists or an unfeeling foster family. Jess had sacrificed for him, and lost over and over because of him.

He might not be a good sort, but he’d known he couldn’t live with continuing to be the reason why Jess didn’t have a stable home. When the elder Dr. McArthur had sneered the question of if he was related to Jess in the hospital room, Ace had finally and clearly understood what he needed to do to repay her for her loyalty.

So, he’d bolted from the family in Marietta before they could take him back to foster care. Before he could ruin Jess’s life in Marietta, when the McArthurs had taken such an interest in her. When she had such a chance.

Based on everything he knew, he’d made the right choice. Jess had had a happy life in Marietta, and it had ended up being pretty good for him, too. He had this. This life where he got to do a really cool job that actually helped people. He was good at it and, as much as it had been making him a little antsy lately, he’d found a place. He belonged to his team, and when they’d lost their captain last year, it had had a deep effect on him.

As much is it had scared him and made him think about leaving before he sank his feelings and roots into anyone or anything else, he’d stayed. He’d stayed to heal and he’d stayed to be supportive to the rest of the team. He’d stayed for the guys who had made him feel like he finally belonged somewhere, for the captain he’d lost too young.

It was all the evidence he needed to know he’d done the right thing in cutting ties with Jess. They were both in good places in their lives because of it, so he’d absolutely done the right thing.

Now, if only he could figure out if spending time with Lina was the right thing. In the crisp air of this gorgeous summer evening, he knew he shouldn’t. He shouldn’t be messing around with someone Jess knew. He shouldn’t be risking all he had made.

Yet he knew without a shadow of a doubt, tomorrow morning he would get up and he would take Lina on a hike. He would give her that perfect day. And if she wanted to, he would sleep with her. Because something about her called to some piece of him he didn’t understand. And maybe he had to answer the call to understand.

It was probably wrong to feel like she could be some good thing. It was probably wrong to think he had a chance to give her something good.

But he knew himself better than to think he would find some sense of valor or common sense in the next twelve hours. No, at nine, he would be at Lina’s door with a picnic lunch and a plan.

He should be disgusted with himself. He should be all sorts of things, but all he could manage to feel as he got back into his truck and pulled it back onto the highway, was excitement.

L
ina couldn’t choke
down much for breakfast. She was too excited and giddy. It felt like the first day at a new job. It felt like… Well, she supposed it felt like what it might to know she were about to go on a date.