I Won't Give Up (14 page)

There was a knock at the door.

“Honey everything alright?” It was my mom.

“I’m fine.” I lied.

“No you’re not,
shouldn’t you be at school? W
hat happened?”

“I pushed Cooper away.
” I sobbed sucking in a deep breath.
“
He gave up on me.
He’s dating someone else.
”

“Honey, can you blame him? He’s spent the last month trying to break down the walls you put up but you didn’t even budge if anything you made them even higher.”

“I know. I guess I just hoped that maybe he’d just keep trying.”
Stupid Fiona. How can you expect him to keep chasing you, he thought
finally gave in
and then you shattered his heart.
You told him to let you go.
It’s what you wanted…

“Fiona, I know it’s been really rough for you to watch how things went on between your dad
and I
but all men aren’t like that. I know I probably should have been stronger and set a better example but he was the only man I’d ever been with in my whole life we were together just short of twenty-five years and then it was like POOF!
Everything changed
and I just wasn’t ready for it.
You should try to talk to him or maybe y
ou
just need to get back out there
with someone else
.
You
should go
to the lake house this weekend;
take a break from Prescott
.
I think you need to clear your head
.
”
It
actually sounded like a good idea.

“Maybe I will. Thanks Mom.”
She turned and left closing the door behind her. I knew this is what I thought I wanted but then why does it hurt so much.
I was supposed to be stronger than this.
I pulled my pillow to my chest and sobbed until I ran out of tears
and fell asleep
.

I heard my phone beep; I grabbed it off the end table. It was from Cooper.

Hey, you okay? I didn’t see you in school today.

I texted him back.

I’m fine.

I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of letting him know how much he hurt me by dating Riley.
The rest of the week was mildly
better
but painful nonetheless
.
I
stayed occupied by
preppin
g myself for my mini getaway. It was hard
, really hard,
to watch Cooper and Riley holding hands through the hallway and kissing at the door before class.
It reminded me of our kissing, our one perfect night.
He would wave and give me the occasional smile and
each time
it would break my heart a little more.
He even tried small talking a few times but I would just smile and interject a bit
.
I was in love with him, whether I wanted to be or not
.
I knew he loved me yet
still felt this overwhelming need
to keep my heart safe
.
I didn’t want to need anyone, my mom needed my dad and look how that ended for her
.

Finally it was Friday and I was leaving straight from here to go to the lake house.
The day passed rather quickly and I was able to avoid Cooper all day, which made it even better. The final bell rang and I headed out to my car
when I saw Cooper running up to me.

“Hey C
rash.”
He said smiling shyly.

“Cooper.”
I said a little harsher than necessary.

“How’ve you been?”
Like you care!

“Fine.”
I bit the inside of my cheek.
Please don’t cry.
“Can you speak in something other than monosyllables?”
He joked.

“Nope.” I opened my trunk and threw my backpack in.
“Where ya going?”
He asked
looking at my luggage. He followed
me around to the drivers side.
“Away.”
I snapped.
“Yeah, where?”
“My family’s
lake house.”

“Well have a good weekend.”
He looked
lost,
like he wanted to say more.

“Y
ep.” I said opening my door. I went to close the door before he stopped it with this hand.

“Fiona.”
He sounded sad, desperate. I wanted to wrap myself in him…
Stop!

“What Cooper. What do you want from me?”
I practically yelled.

“I didn’t want it to be like this. Just thought you should k
now that.
Riley’
s not you.
I still want it to be you.
”
He said in just about a whisper, I wondered if he was talking to himself.

“Thanks. That makes me feel so much better Cooper. Can I go now?” I snapped.

“Be careful. Okay?”
I could see the hurt all over his face. I just hoped I was better at concealing mine.

“Sure.” He shut my door and I sped away towards the lake house
trying my best not to cry.
I turned up the radio and drowned out the world.
The just under
two-hour drive seemed to pass
quickly
. When I was right outside of town
I stopped and got gas and went into the general store.
As I was walking up t
here was a group of guys around my age standing in the parking lot
around a black Chevy Tahoe
.

“Hey
! Can I take your picture?
” The one yelled.

“Excuse me?”
I said sarcastically.
“Can I take your picture so I can tell Santa what I want for Christmas.”

“Seriously? Is that the best you can do?”
I rolled my eyes
feigning annoyance
.

“If I could rearrange the alphabet I’d put U and I together.” I couldn’t help but laugh
that was the most ridiculous pick up line I’d ever heard
. The
re were three of them and the
y were all
very
cute
. W
hat the hell
, I vowed to let myself have some fun
.

“
Sorry about him.
I’m Garrett,
that’s
Jackson a
nd the ass is Eli.
”
He said offering his hand. I offered mine in return and he brought it to his mouth and kissed it, a sweet gesture I thought to myself.

“Nice to meet you. I’m Fiona.”

“Nice car. Yours?”
He said looking impressed.

“Yes.”
I said embarrassed.

“You from around here?”

“No. But my family has a house here.”

“Cool, we’re here c
amping for the weekend. Maybe
we
can grab dinner or something?” Garrett said.

“Maybe.”

“I’d like that
. H
ow about say eight at Bubba’s Bar-B-Q
?
”

“We’ll see.”
All I really wanted to do was lounge in my pajamas and eat a pint of Ben & Jerry while watching chick flicks.
“It’s a date.” Garrett said.

“No it’s not.” I said
feeling both happy and annoyed
.

“We’ll see.”
He winked.
I walked away.
What is it with persistent men in my life?
I grabbed my few necessities such as soda, chocolate, ice cream and a few microwave dinners for my weekend and headed to the lake house. By the time I got there it was almost six. I walked in an almost instantly felt lighter
, my mom was right
. The lake house belonged to my grandparents and we inherited it when they passed. It was beautiful
,
nothing overly extravagan
t
tons of windows and white wainscoting
that made it seem airy and comfortable
. I put my groceries away and walked to the main bedroom to unpack. I decided on a nice long bath so I could think. Should I go tonight? Part of me didn’t want to
,
but
a bigger
part of me just wanted to be someone else other than Fiona Prescott
just
for a little while.
I had a text from Cooper on my phone.

I wish things were different

He was the one that chose someone over me
maybe I should do the same.
I climbed into the antique claw foot tub.
I thought of Garrett he was cute, tall, blonde with a light muscular build
, he had a really nice smile and
seemed nice enough. I wondered if his friends would come along since they were all here t
ogether. What the hell,
what do I have to lose right. I got out of the tub and
sat at my grandmother’s vanity. I
brushed
the knots
out my hair adding just a little bit of mousse so that it could air dry. I carefully applied my make-up going for a natural-chic look. I grabbed my navy
blue
tulle skirt and
light
gray halter and by the time I got dressed it was already 7:30. I threw on a pair of silver wedges
and a sweater grabbing
my keys
and headed
to
go
meet Garrett
. I was
hoping I made the right choice.

I pulled
in right next to his black
Tahoe and headed inside. He was standing off to the side waiting for me
.
He was in a pair of overly washed denim jeans, a grey t-shirt with a
n undone
navy and white checked
button up and a pair of work boots
. His b
londe hair was neatly styled,
he flashed me
a smile
. I was happy
with my decision
it was better than the alternative
.

“Fiona. I’m glad you decided to come. I was thinking you were going to stand me up.” He said as he greeted me with a kiss on the cheek. “You look beautiful.”
“So do you. I mean you like nice too. We kinda match.” I laughed noticing that we were both in grey and navy.

“So we do. Shall we?” He gestured us up to the hostess to get a table.
“I got us a table outside. I hope you don’t mind.”
I was glad I grabbed my sweater.

“Outsides perfect.” Despite the name Bubba’s wasn’t a dive
,
it served more of a gourmet BBQ menu and was right on the other side of lake on the water. He held out his arm as the hostess showed us to our table.

“Are your friends mad
that you ditched them?” I asked.

“No
,
a little jealous maybe but they’re out doing their own thing.”
He shrugged.

“So what brings to Lake Winona?”

“It’s a nice place to camp and it’s not too far away from us, about and hour and a half.”

“Where are you from?”

“Delaney. How about you?” Delaney. Wasn’t Cooper from Delaney?

“Oh, I’m from Prescott.”

“Hear it’s nice there. T
hat’s about forty-five minutes to an hour from where I am.
I’ve n
ever been but maybe
now
I’ll have a reason to go sometime.”  He smiled. The vibes were good and he was really easy to be with maybe because there were no pretenses to keep up. “Are you in school?”

“Yeah, just started my senior year.”
I said stuffing my mouth full of ribs, very unladylike.

“Nice. I graduated last year but decided to take a year off for myself
to travel
and do some
thing’s I probably won’t get to do once I start college and the real world.
Do you have plans for after you graduate?”

“I wanted to go to
Vand
erbilt University in Nashville,
I’m looking into either a degree in nursing or psychology I’m not sure which yet.
But I’m not sure if that’s where I want to go anymore.
”
I originally planned on going to NYU to be closer to Jack but I’ve always loved Vanderbilt.
I had so much personal drama on my mind I hadn’t had much time to think about college.
Me the emotional train wreak
a psychologist, the thought made me laugh.

“Well I
’m going to Tennessee State
in the fall so I’ll be in
Nashville
too. If you go that is and if you still want to talk to me after tonight.”