I Am What I Am
Authors: John Barrowman
I Am What I Am
Praise for John’s first book,
Anything Goes
‘
Anything Goes
is a refreshingly honest, funny and engaging read that hooks readers from the opening chapter.’
Woman’s Way
‘John Barrowman, the immensely likeable actor behind Captain Jack, has written his autobiography … Charmingly lurid, the book has the right saucy, sassy, somewhat overexcited quality for an afternoon on the sofa with a box of violet creams.’
Daily Telegraph
‘Multi-talented John Barrowman, the star of the
Doctor Who
spin-off
Torchwood
, tells of behind-the-scenes celeb high jinks, hilarious memories and the sometimes moving story of his two decades of work in the film, TV, music and theatre industry in this open and entertaining autobiography.’
The Herald
‘Charting his rise to superstardom from humble beginnings in Scotland to life in LA,
Torchwood
star John Barrowman reveals how he has become one of the best-loved stars of the stage and screen. Four stars.’
OK!
‘Gossipy, fun and endlessly entertaining, buy this out of curiosity, buy it for the insight into the worlds of stage and television, but most of all, buy it for his absolutely hilarious stories of a Glasgow childhood with a granny you’ll just adore.’
Daily Record
‘John Barrowman is on a bit of a roll at the moment. Everything he touches seems to turn to gold and his heartfelt autobiography is no exception … This is a charming read that really gives us insight into John Barrowman.’
Beige
I Am What I Am
JOHN BARROWMAN
with Carole E. Barrowman
Michael O’Mara Books Limited
First published in Great Britain in 2009 by Michael O’Mara Books Limited
9 Lion Yard
Tremadoc Road
London SW4 7NQ
This electronic edition published 2010
ISBN 978-1-84317-512-4 in EPub format
ISBN 978-1-84317-513-1 in Mobipocket format
Copyright © John Barrowman 2009, 2010
The right of John Barrowman to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted by him in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.
All pictures courtesy of John Barrowman, and reproduced with his kind permission, apart from: Plate 27, Plate 31 & 32, Plate 34 © BBC.
With additional thanks to Ben Sayer (Plate 50, all but bottom); Rhys Livesy (Plate 50, bottom); Dan Hallman at Pearson Lyle Management (Plate 74, left); and Simon Turtle (Plate 74, right).
Every reasonable effort has been made to acknowledge all copyright holders. Any errors or omissions that may have occurred are inadvertent, and anyone with any copyright queries is invited to write to the publishers, so that a full acknowledgement may be
included in subsequent editions of this work.
You may not copy, store, distribute, transmit, reproduce or otherwise make available this publication (or any part of it) in any form, or by any means (electronic, digital, optical, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise), without the prior written permission of the publisher. Any person who does any unauthorized act in relation to this publication may be liable to criminal prosecution and civil claims for damages.
A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.
Designed and typeset by E-Type
Plate section and cover designed by Ana Bjezancevic
Cover photography: Dan Hallman at Pearson Lyle Management
www.mombooks.com
Table Talk #1: ‘You People Can’t Go in There’
Table Talk #2: ‘We Have a Hostage Situation – Send in the Clowns’
Table Talk #3: ‘Kiss, Kiss, Bang, Bang!’
Table Talk #4: ‘There’s an Iguana in the Toilet and He’s Grinning at Me’
Table Talk #5: ‘Blame It on the Flip-Flops … and the Harveys’
Table Talk #6: ‘Was That Captain Jack Racing a Rickshaw?’
Table Talk #7: ‘Oh No, You Didn’t!’
Table Talk #8: ‘Two Men and Their Dogs’
12 ‘A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square’
Table Talk #9: ‘Zaza, Elphaba, Tottie and Me’
Table Talk #10: ‘Goodnight and Thank You’
I
’ve approached this book from a slightly different angle than the first one,
Anything Goes
. Rather than covering the panorama of my life, I’ve zoomed in on a few key events and experiences of the past few years, and sprinkled among them family stories that give you a chance to get a little closer to me. The brief vignettes scattered among the chapters are called ‘Table Talks’ – because when I was growing up, these more intimate, funny, quirky stories were the ones that made up the conversation at the Barrowman dinner table, as in, ‘That’s a story for table talk.’ When you turn the page and enter my house in Sully, you’ll see what I mean.
Wait! Not yet. This part’s important too. I’ll be quick.
Once again, Carole and I collaborated on this book and, once again, we have people to thank. We owe a great debt – to be repaid (we promise) in books, golf, shoes, purses and a slap-up meal or two – to Scott, Kevin, Clare (‘Oh, my, there’s a jewellery store’), Turner, and especially to our parents, John and Marion Barrowman (the Harveys and the Glenmorangies are on us, Mum and Dad). Our lives would be very boring and this book would be very short without each one of you. Both of us are grateful for your love, your support, and your sense of humour (even when it’s mocking us).
To Gavin Barker (aka Patricia), my manager and our friend – you’re the tops, and indispensable when it comes to remembering details and returning emails.
Hugs and kisses to the rest of Team Barrowman: Rhys Livesy, my personal assistant, and Michelle, Steven and Katie at Gavin Barker Associates.
We would like to sing the praises of everyone at Michael O’Mara Books, especially Alison Parker, Sarah Sandland, and our patient and stalwart editor, Kate Gribble – we owe you a karaoke night … or two, Kate.
Also thanks to Andrew, Dot, Andrew, Yvonne and Bridgett, and the Barrowmans in Scotland, for letting us share with the world how bloody barmy we all are.
Finally, and most importantly, this book is dedicated to all my fans.
With love, John 2009
‘PROMENADE’
★
‘Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.’
Groucho Marx
1 A caricature depicting the
Torchwood
cast embracing Captain Jack and Captain John in an exuberant tangle of arms and legs (say no more).
2 The original sheet music for Cole Porter’s ‘I Get a Kick Out of You’ (a gift from my Reno Sweeney, Sally Ann Triplett).
3 Model planes, ships and cars, and a telescope to view the stars (these are a few of Scott’s favourite things, too).
4 Two goldfish that my niece, Clare, and I rescued from a friend’s house and named after two of our ‘pet’ names for each other (Shaka and Nina).
5 My gran, Murn’s, two ‘Wally Dugs’.
6 A bust of Caesar and a statue of Buddha in the bathroom, plus an oversized, welded-steel statue of a male diver in a backward pike that dominates the interior courtyard.
W
elcome, readers – to my home in Sully, Wales, and to my life in the spotlight. Watch out for my dogs tangling themselves at your feet: Harris, a boisterous black cocker spaniel; Charlie, a gorgeous red-haired Dogs Trust rescue spaniel; and the family’s thug, Captain Jack, a rescued Jack Russell terrier from Cardiff Dogs Home. Try to avoid their frenzied doggy madness as you step into my front foyer, and consider yourselves very lucky – because, since there’s so many of you, I haven’t gently urged you into the foyer, switched off the lights, closed the outer door … and left you alone to discover that a full-size black Dalek looms in the corner.
1
The Dalek is one of a kind, made especially for me by the
Doctor Who
tech guys; I requested that the
Torchwood
logo be tattooed beneath his menacing eye stalk. My
Torchwood
Dalek is one of two treasured pieces of memorabilia displayed in pride of place at the front of my home because of their importance to my success in the entertainment business.
The second piece is far less scary, but equally significant. Hanging on my interior front door – where a welcome wreath might normally be – is the SS
American
life preserver from Trevor Nunn’s revival of
Anything Goes
, in which I played Billy Crocker.
Anything Goes
, as you may know, was the Cole Porter musical in which I made my West End debut with Elaine Paige in 1989.
Anyone can make a grand entrance promenading along this hallway towards the main part of the house; even the dogs love to skid up and down on the blond oak-wood floor. To your left is a guest bathroom that I call my ‘superhero room’. It’s decorated with comic-book art:
a poster-sized ‘Spidey Saves the Day’ comic cover, and on the wall opposite this is a poster from one of the first Superman movies. The film’s tag line is ‘Irresistible Force’ – which is an appropriate mantra for a toilet, don’t you think?
Most of the art and the photographs in this hallway – and elsewhere in the house – punctuate special moments in my life or Scott’s. For example, next to the bathroom door, you’ll notice the framed drawings and costume swatches for one of my
Dancing on Ice
costumes. The best art, though, is through the far windows in front of you.
The view of the sea and the distant English coast is stunning, isn’t it? After a hectic week of meetings or rehearsals or recordings or whatever, I come down this hallway, see that expanse of water – the Bristol Channel, and beyond to the Celtic Sea – and the surrounding craggy cliffs, and my entire body kicks into relax mode.
2
One of the first things Scott and I do when we arrive home together is drop our bags at the bedroom door and step outside, where, for a few minutes, we simply stand and stare at the majesty of it all.
While sitting on my deck overlooking this spectacular view, I began exploring ideas for this second book. I re-read many of your comments about my first book,
Anything Goes
. I’ve received letters and emails from all over the world since
AG
’s publication, and after seriously mulling them over, a few things really struck me.
One of them was this. No matter what your family experiences, you found connections with the Barrowman clan. Sisters wrote to me about their brothers; brothers wrote to me that they, too, had a bossy big sis.
3
Mums shared the book with daughters, and then they passed it along to their sons. Gay sons gave the book to their parents, hoping for some understanding; and parents gave the book to their gay sons, saying they understood. A few of you told me you used the book as a way to mend bridges within your families, and a lot of you revealed that the book reminded you of your own family’s silly antics. You
sent me tales about your dogs, your children, your schools and your grans.
4
And all of them brought me great joy. Some of you shared stories of alienation and exile from your families, and I’m deeply touched that you found some comfort in the anecdotes from mine. It was a no-brainer, then, that this new book would include a few more Barrowman yarns.
Watch your step as you come down into my main living area, which runs the length of the house; its expansive windows frame the pool and the sea beyond.
5
This space is divided into three distinct living areas: two ranged with their own comfy reading chairs and oversized leather couches, while the third space, at the far end of the room, accommodates a massive wooden table that came from Thailand. The table is scarred with the knots, crevices and imprints of the two trees that produced it, as well as the countless cocktail parties, family dinners, lunches and buffets it’s played host to, and the book piles, laundry piles and other everyday stuff and more stuff that ends up on all dining-room tables.
