Hustlin' (17 page)
Authors: L. Divine
“Out damned spot, out I say!” I'm on stage as Lady Macbeth's crazy ass, sleepwalking through the castle. I love this scene because I can feel her guilt about her part in the murder of the king. But it's not my character's pain I'm experiencing in the moment: it's my own.
“Out damned spot! What was that?” I walk over toward the audience, which looks sparse in the black background. A girl's hand reaches out of the darkness and grabs my hand. It's Laura, pulling me down into the audience.
“Sit down,” she whispers harshly in my face, pulling me out of character. “You don't belong here.” She stands up, shouting in the quiet theater. “Give me my crown!” Laura pulls my arm hard, forcing me to lose my footing and fall into the front row of the audience. While I'm down, Laura snatches the jewel-encrusted tiara off my head, pulling my hair in the process.
“Ouch!” I scream, reaching up and returning the favor.
Laura grabs my hand and we fight for the queen's crown. The crowd around us clears the path to let the brawl ensue. I can see Mrs. Bennett's evil smile in the background, but no one's face becomes clear. It's just me and Laura and my crown. After a few moments of intense struggling, Reid, also in character as Macbeth, appears behind Laura.
“If we should fail?” Reid asks, completely in character. Before I can deliver my response, Laura takes the words right out of my mouth.
“We fail! But screw your courage to the sticking-place, and we'll not fail.”
Even though Laura's acting like she's in character, the look in her eyes tells me she's talking about something else completely and Reid, being under her spell, doesn't even get it.
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“Jayd, your cell is out here. Do you want to lose it or what?” Jay says, cracking open the bedroom door and waking me up with my ringing phone. I neglected to buy batteries for my classic Tasmanian Devil alarm clock and set my phone alarm last night when I got off the phone with my dad.
“Thank you, Jay.” He saved me from losing my phone to one of my thieving uncles, and I am grateful. It's the holidays and I know they'd be tempted to pawn my shit in exchange for a couple of bucks. The sad fact is that it doesn't have to be the holidays for my uncles to jack: it's their main hustle all year long.
“Whatever. Keep up with your stuff so I don't have to wake up to turn it off. Brothas need beauty sleep, too.” Jay tosses my phone on the foot of my bed and goes back to his top bunk in Daddy's room for another hour of sleep. At least he gets his rest. I have to get up before sunrise after dealing with crazy-ass dreams.
I'm going to have to seriously look into support groups for other children born with cauls. Too bad I won't have much support for my day today. I can only imagine what Mrs. Bennett has in store for me. She couldn't get to me on Friday because the principal was out, even though she made me stay in the office and miss my first dress rehearsal.
I'm going to go through my day like nothing's happened, like it was all a bad dream. Maybe if I act innocent then nothing will happen to me. Owning a guilty conscience is what got Lady Macbeth caught up. And if my dream is any indication of what's to comeâand I know it isâLaura's going to fight hard for my part and I'm not giving in that easily.
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Monday wasn't as eventful as I had anticipated. My entire crew was absent from school today. I didn't expect to see Nigel or Mickey today after yesterday's tumultuous encounter with Nigel's parents. But Nellie and Chance being absent is interesting. Jeremy's attendance is always a crapshoot, especially when it's a gorgeous, windy day making for good surf, like today.
With the various school activities going on before the holidays, the administration is holding meetings for two days, keeping even Mrs. Bennett too busy to torture me. But I'm sure by Wednesday she'll be back on my ass. Until then, I'm going to get my study and rehearsal on like never before. Even Laura's chilled out, making our rehearsal more tolerable than usual. I guess Mickey was right. Without my confession, they've got nothing on me, no matter what letter they think they may have.
Now, riding around in this rickety Nissan Sentra with this hippie lovechild showing me the difference between the gas and the brake, I'm missing my crew being together more than ever. I didn't tell Rah or Mickey about my lessons because they have other things to worry about. Also, if I don't do well I don't want anyone to know. But I do know this chick is wasting my time, like I don't know the parts of a car. But I guess she's just doing her job.
“Okay, Jayd. That ends your first lesson. Tomorrow you will drive. Sound good?” my instructor says, pulling up to Miracle Market, our designated drop-off spot. I didn't want her taking me home for fear of being teased by my hood folks, family included. I also don't want to remind Mama that I'm taking lessons my daddy's paying for.
Ain't that some backwards shit, having to hide the fact that my father is paying for me to have something? But that's how it is and I have to play the hand I've been dealt, no matter how unfair it may seem.
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Tuesday went by without so much as a peep from anyone. When Nigel and Mickey finally arrived at school, they were summoned to the office and spent the entire day there. Mrs. Bennett didn't come to rehearsal either. I'm guessing both are related, but I'm trying not to think about that situation at all. My rehearsals have been going well, even if my dress didn't fit. It was about four inches too long and has to be taken up at the hem and let out in the arms. As long as it's ready for Monday night's opening, it's all good.
“Jayd, this is for you,” Mrs. Peterson says as soon as I set foot in her class. I had an AP meeting for break and it was basically an extension of English class with our English teacher, Mrs. Malone, taking over for Mrs. Bennett, who wasn't there. It's been so nice not seeing the wench on a regular basis that I almost forgot what she looks like.
“Can I leave my books here?” I ask, reading the summons to the attendance office. I get a chill up my arm from holding the small yellow note that lets me know this isn't good. The look in Mrs. Peterson's eyes confirms my intuition.
“I don't think you'll be back,” she says with a smile while looking down at her newspaper.
What's really going on?
“Hey Jayd,” Jeremy says, entering the classroom as I exit. “Aren't you going the wrong way?”
“Apparently not. My presence has been requested in the office.” I show Jeremy the slip and he shakes his head from side to side. I know he's seen many of these in his days here. Me, I've only seen one and this second occurrence is not welcome.
“Good luck. I hope it's not too serious. Whatever you do, don't let them see you sweat,” he says, like I'm about to go into a boxing ring. “They can smell fear on their opponent.”
“Thanks for the advice, Don King.”
Jeremy laughs and gives me a hug. The bell rings above our heads. Other students rush past us into the classroom, but we don't move. His arms are so warm and he smells like Irish Spring. I'm glad I ran into him before going to face these folks in the front. I'll be so relaxed from Jeremy's energy that they won't be able to upset me too bad, I hope.
“I'll call you later.” Jeremy watches me walk off toward the main office. For once, I'm going to miss being in government class.
When I make it to the attendance office, Mrs. Bennett is waiting for me outside.
“Jayd, so glad you could make it. Come right in,” she says, opening the door to the assistant principal's office. I've never been in here before, but it's just as dull as the rest of the offices up here.
When I step inside, I notice Mickey and Nigel sitting in two seats across from the desk, which is located in the center of the room. Mrs. Bennett escorts me to another chair next to the desk on the opposite side. I sit, and she sits down in the chair next to mine.
“Mr. Brown will return momentarily,” she says. I look at my friends, who both look a wreck. I haven't spoken to either of them since Sunday and I'm completely out of the loop.
“Ah, this must be the infamous Jayd Jackson,” Mr. Brown says. I recognize him from school assemblies, but we've never met. He walks past us and takes a seat behind the large desk. In his hands are several files, and I'm assuming that one of them is mine.
Here we go.
“Mr. Brown, the letter in question is in the red folder,” Mrs. Bennett says, pointing to one of the files in his hand.
“Ah, yes. Thank you. Now, Miss Jackson, we're really not all that concerned with your role in this serious infraction of school policy, which is apparently a repeated violation for your friend Mickey here,” he says, eyeing another folder.
“But we do know that you played a role, indeed,” Mrs. Bennett snarls.
Where does she get off acting like she's the almighty?
“Yes, well, see, that's why you're here. We've yet to determine who forged the signature or whether or not the note is indeed forged. That's why we need you to tell us the truth, young lady.” Mr. Brown looks at me in such a paternalistic way I want to get up and smack him in the face. He's not my daddy and he shouldn't assume shit about me, even if he is right. I didn't want to help Mickey ditch in the first place and I'm pissed as ever to be sitting in the office, wasting my time. So he's got it all wrong if he thinks I wanted to help them out.
“What he's saying, Jayd, is that you can save us a full investigation by simply confessing right now. That way, you'd be able to negotiate keeping your part in the play and suspending your punishment until after the holiday. But if you don't confess, well, then we'll have no choice but to put you on immediate probation while we investigate your role in this matter, which will also mean the immediate surrender of your lead.” Mrs. Bennett looks like she's just won a million dollars as she serves me my cold portion of her bitch's brew.
“I don't understand,” I say, ready to feign ignorance. I'm not letting them entrap me into a confession. I don't know what Mickey and Nigel said to them, but I know they didn't rat me out. Unlike Nellie, they've got more loyalty to the unspoken code between friends than she does. “If you don't know for a fact the letter in question is a forgery, then why are we here?”
“Look, young lady, you're in enough trouble as it is without all the sass. Backtalk won't do anything but land you in more hot water.” Mr. Brown turns red as he talks to me. I guess Mrs. Bennett's already filled him in on her opinion of my attitude.
“And to answer your question, you're in here because we have an eye witness who says you signed the letter in his or her presence.”
She can generalize the pronoun all she wants. I know it was a she. Which sheâLaura, Nellie or Mistyâis the question.
“Well, if you want to do this the hard way, so be it. But I think it's very selfish of you to let down your fellow thespians. Now your understudy will have to play your part.” Mrs. Bennett looks victorious as she snatches away my part in the blink of an eye.
Mickey and Nigel look sorry and I know that they are. But that doesn't make me feel any better. How am I going to explain this to my cast and, more importantly, to Mama?
“That's all for now, Jayd. Thank you,” Mr. Brown says, writing me a pass to return to class.
What the hell?
“When we return from the winter break, we'll launch a full investigation to get to the bottom of this matter. I don't think you all realize how serious this is.” Mr. Brown looks at me sternly and then to a beaming Mrs. Bennett. I have a feeling he's trying to impress her. He then returns his gaze to me and smiles. “Have a good holiday, Miss Jackson.”
And without another word, Mrs. Bennett rises from her chair and opens his office door, waiting for my departure.
Damn, these fools up here are cold. But like Jeremy advised, I'm not going to let them see me sweat or cry. I'm going to wait until I'm outside before showing my emotions.
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Mrs. Peterson's not expecting me back, so I decide to sit in the courtyard where the seniors and cozy couples hang out during the breaks. No one's here right now and I need the quiet to wrap my head around the last few weeks. I place my backpack on my lap and hug it tightly, again noticing my charm bag with the word “listen” written across the front. This bag saved me from getting into a fight with KJ's ex-trick. Maybe it'll help me see my way through this mess.
“Jayd, are you okay?” Ms. Toni says, catching me by surprise. She joins me on the cozy bench, placing her file folders on her lap and putting her left arm around my shoulder, causing the tears puddling in my eyes to break away from their safety net and slide down my cheek. I can't stop thinking about how many ways I could've played this scenario out differently.
“Not really,” I say, wiping the tears from my cheeks with the back of my sweatshirt sleeve. It's a chilly day and I'm still in need of a real coat. Ms. Toni's thin frame doesn't help to warm me up and the smell of her cigarettes is all over her jacket, making me back up little. “Mickey and Nigel got busted ditching and the administration thinks they can prove that I forged Mickey's note to return to school.”
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