Hurting To Feel (Carpool Dolls) (28 page)

"Bring
me Addison, and I'll answer all your questions," Professor Frank said.

"No.
Fucking. Way." Nathan stepped toward him.

Professor
held up his hand. "Son, you have no room to push your way into my business.
What I have to say will affect her more than you, and I swore on my life I
would never tell."

"You're
not touching her." He growled.

"Of
course not." Professor stood and faced Nathan. "I will break my
promise for you. Only you. But, I want Addison to hear everything from my lips
and not someone else."

"I
don't owe you," he muttered. "This has nothing to do with what you've
done for me. Don't make Addison pay."

Professor
shook his head. "I would never hurt her."

"How
do I know that?" he asked.

Professor
Frank clamped his hand on Nathan's shoulder, despite Nathan topping him by five
inches and thirty pounds. "Because you are my heart. You're the child I
raised and my proudest accomplishment."

###

"Absolutely
not." Addison planted her hands on her hips and stood before him naked in
the bedroom. "There's no way I can look the Professor in the face knowing
what he did to my mother."

Nathan
ran his hands across his face. "He's just like anyone else. If you hadn't
seen the pictures, you'd have no idea what he enjoyed doing privately. The same
way people look at me and see a successful man. Except, Professor Frank is…he's
a good guy, doll. He's the only person who gave me guidance when all I wanted
to do is destroy myself. He caught me pilfering cars when I was twelve, and
instead of turning me in, he forced me to show up at his house the next day
without threatening me. From then on, I had someone to explain why I needed to
act out. He guided me and gave me proper outlets. He built me into believing in
myself, instead of the hatred contaminating my life."

She
snorted and crossed her arms. "You don't know how you would've turned out.
Maybe you would've—she shook her head—I don't know."

"I
do." He looked at her. "I'd be dead. I wanted to die, because I had
no control over the darkness."

Her
whole body slumped. "I hate this."

"We're
not going to get any answers about your mother if you don't talk with him. I'll
be with you the whole time. Nothing will happen. He only wants to talk to you
about your mother, and he doesn't want the information coming from anyone else.
He's…sworn some secret deal with your mother." He approached Addison.
"If not tomorrow, then we'll go the next day or the following week. Think
about it. You need closure, and the only way you'll find it is to discover who
your mother is."

"I
know who she is…now…was. I also know who my father is." She leaned forward
and head-planted into his chest. "My parents suck."

His
chest rumbled under her head. "At least you know who they are."

"Shit."
She wrapped her arms around his waist. "I'm sorry. I've been so focused on
me, I'm being inconsiderate."

He
chuckled. "You think I care? I don't. I wouldn't wish for family problems.
I'm seeing the benefits of growing up on the streets."

She
slapped his arm. "Don't say that."

"You
know what that'll get you." He glared.

Her
stomach quivered and she stuck her chin in the air. "I'm not quite
sure."

He
lunged for her. She screamed and ran. Laughter made her slow, and he caught her
at the top of the stairs. "Let me go."

The
arm around her waist lifted her feet off the ground. She kicked out, but the
happiness bubbled out of her. After they made love when he got home from
running his errand, he'd turned playful.

A
playful Nathan was a sight to see and experience. She wiggled and finally he
let her down in the bedroom, but before she could do anything else, she was
pinned to the bed.

"Oomph."
She grunted.

His
gaze heated. With a loss of breath and the fire in Nathan's eyes, her pussy
spasmed in anticipation. "Again?"

He
nodded, pushing off her and getting off the bed. She lay, watching him walk to
the closet and return with one of her scarves. She bit her lip to keep from
smiling. Just like that, he could take her from warm to hot.

A
scarf, she could handle.

"Stand
up." He waited at the end of the bed.

She
crawled toward him and slid off the mattress. He knotted the end of the scarf
around her wrist. She held the other arm up for him, but he ignored the offered
hand. Then he stepped onto the mattress and tied the other end of the scarf to
a white hook she'd never noticed in the ceiling.

She
tugged her hand. "Nathan?"

"You
want to run…" He shrugged. "Run."

Confused,
she yanked on the scarf. It wasn't tight, but she couldn't slip her hand out of
the knot, nor could she walk more than two feet in a circle. She crossed her
arms. "I don't get it."

If
she wanted, she could touch him. Usually, he kept her from participating and
put her at his mercy.

"You
seem to enjoy trying to get a rise out of me." He turned around, but not
before she caught the twitch of his lips. "Let's see how much you can
infuriate me tonight."

Okay.
Infuriate was a strong word. She watched him carefully.

He
opened up the bottom dresser drawer and removed one of his belts. She stepped
back and her arm came uncrossed. The scarf reached its limit.

"I
see you're starting to understand what you can and can't do." He walked a
full circle around her. "You already know how much I enjoy when you fight
me."

She
sucked in her breath, turning her head to keep him in her sight as he strolled
around her. Once he went behind her, she lost sight of him. A hot pain landed
on her ass. Her knees collapsed and she landed on her bottom, her arm pulled
above her.
Shit.

She
had room, but she didn't have much to work with. She could fall to the floor,
but couldn't run away without dislocating her arm.

"Already,
you've got one mark on your left butt cheek, doll." He snapped the belt.

She
jolted at the sound of the strap popping, but no pain came.

"Stand
up," he said.

She
struggled to get up without putting pressure on her hand. In an upright
position, her arm relaxed.

"Now
that I've seen the pictures of your mother, I can see the difference between
you and her." He ran the end of the belt between her legs.

She
scowled. "Nathan…"

"What?"
He stopped. "That's what you want to find out, right? You want to know how
much you're like your mother."

She
shook her head. "No."

"She
enjoyed a man's hand, the same way you do." He doubled the leather and
slapped her breast.

She
jerked, covering herself. "Don't talk about her."

He
snapped her other breasts. "Look at that. You get such a lovely blush,
just like your mother. I wonder…"

In
quick repetition, he walked around her, hitting the leather against her skin.
She covered her leg, her stomach, her ass, and tried to refract the stings
until her free arm stung from the many times it was whipped as she tried to
deflect the hits, and her other arm ached against the pull of the scarf.

Every
cell in her body warmed and each sting, each burn, made her lose focus. After Nathan
took another turn around her, leaving no area unattended, she gave up and stood
there without moving. Her pussy pulsed with the adrenaline pumping through her
body.

She
fairly vibrated from her muscles spasming. The heat from the contact he made
radiated throughout her. Sensitive and alive, even Nathan's breath caressed her
skin. He'd touched every inch of her body.

"Beautiful."
Nathan stood in front of her and looped the belt around her neck, pulling her
forward and capturing her mouth.

Hard,
demanding, and suffocating, he used her mouth for his own pleasure as he
plunged his tongue inside her. She struggled against the belt, trying to breathe.
Lightheaded, she pushed at his stomach.

He
pulled back and gazed down at her breasts. She panted, sucking air into her
lungs. He'd taken her by force before, but this was different. She couldn't get
away if she tried, and he knew it.

While
she trusted him, she also feared he'd go too far.

"You
like this." He tweaked her hard nipples.

She
shivered. "I-I don't know."

He
trailed the belt down her stomach, over her bare mound, and stopped. "You
crave this."

She
didn't. Not this. He'd pushed his way into her head, and she only wanted his
touch. She could lose herself under his attention.

"Your
mother enjoyed a heavy hand." He stepped back. "You beg for more and delight
in every wince of discomfort and caress each mark I've ever left on you when
you think I'm not looking. But, I'm always watching you."

"Stop,"
she whispered.

"I've
seen you." He brought the belt down on her outer thigh. "You're more
content and confident after each time we're together. You grow and become more
secure with each bruise I leave on your skin."

She
stared up into his eyes, defying him. She wanted him to stop, but she wanted
him to push her for more even worse.

It
was all true. She hated her mother, but she had her mother's need to take and
take and take.

Nathan
kicked her foot out to the side, opening her legs. As she caught her balance,
he thrust his finger into her. She groaned. The pleasure, swift and intense,
she knew there was no way she could stop herself from coming if he continued.

All
she needed was more. More feelings, more touching, more, more, more.

"Your
mother liked what was done to her too," he said, adding another finger and
holding her suspended from his hand. "Just like you, she begged for
more."

She
shook her head. "I d-don't want to be like her," she rasped.

He
dropped the belt and grabbed her hair, forcing her gaze up. She panted through
clenched teeth, hating her reaction, despising the truth about her mother, and
most of all wanting him to end the torture and bring her relief.

"The
difference between you and your mother is you give." Nathan brought his
mouth down to her ear, nipping on her earlobe and whispering. "You give me
every part of yourself, doll."

His
thumb pressed against her clit without him taking his fingers out of her. She rose
on tiptoe, leaning against the pressure. The pain from her arm warmed her,
until she absorbed Nathan in front of her, his touch, his words, his breath.

"Unlike
your mother who held herself back from loving you properly, you made sure
others would never feel the neglect. The dolls, Joan, Lilly, Donny, even me. We
all benefit from you," he whispered into her ear. "Come for me, Addy.
Feel what you do to all of us."

As
if he commandeered her body, her core tightened and exploded, rocking her.
Vibrations grew and flowed out to her limbs. Unable to support herself, Nathan
picked her up and undid the scarf from her wrist, and then simply held her in
the middle of the room.

Weakened,
she lay her head on his shoulder, her arms looped around his neck, and gave
herself to him fully. She was not like her mother.

First
thing in the morning, she was going to prove it to herself, to Nathan, and to
her father. She'd get the answers she needed, and attest to Curt Stewart she
was worth knowing. If he wanted to deny he had a daughter, that was his right,
but at least she'd put one of her fears to rest.

Then,
she'd go see Professor Frank with Nathan. Only then could she bury her mother
for good, and move on with her life.

She
would no longer live in fear. Fear her mother created inside of her. She'd
purge herself of anything that resembled Carly Flint.

Chapter
Thirty-Two

Ten
o'clock in the morning after deciding to right her life and move forward the
night before, Addison stood outside the Stewart building and gazed up at all
nine stories of steel and glass. She closed her eyes as dizziness came over her.

She
inhaled the cool air, opened her eyes, and strolled through the automatic
doors. For years, she'd hidden behind her mother's fear until even thinking
about running into her father caused her to become physically sick. Not
anymore.

The
lobby receptionist smiled and she returned the gesture. She murmured hello to
the guide outside the elevator. As she rode up to the ninth floor, she
complimented a woman on her shoes. She wasn't lying. The four-inch magenta
pumps were sexy.

Without
an appointment to announce her visit, she hoped to catch Curt Stewart by
surprise and gauge his reaction in private. In his office. In his building. In
his environment where he felt safe and protected.