Hunger of the Heart (Wolves of Ravenwillow Book 1) (23 page)

His hand cupping her cheek, he smiled down at her. It was a warm, caring smile and his touch against her face no longer felt flirtatious, but brotherly. “For as long as you need me, I promise.”

“She doesn’t need you.” A dark voice said from behind them. “She’s mine and you; my back stabbing friend are dead.”

* ~ * ~ *

Unable to walk any further, Eric feet stumbled as he fell against the wall to his left. His claws spouted from his fingertips, leaving grooves in the wall as he fought to hold himself up. It was too much, he couldn’t fight it. Beneath his skin, his beast rose.

Panting he bit back a snarl of pain as his beast rose, so did the deep ache in his chest, the ache of refusing to claim his mate. To make matters worse, he’d walked away from another mate, leaving her with another male! His wolf wouldn’t accept it and now; neither could he. If he was forced to reveal what he was to Rebecca this day because of his lack of control, then so be it. He would attempt to make her understand what he was and quell her fear that would follow, then he intended to claim her until there was no chance of her ever leaving him.

With a determined look, he shoved the pain in his chest away, forcing his legs to move, he straightened to his full height. Turning back toward Rebecca’s lingering scent, with his claw fisted hands at his sides, he followed her trail back to her. When he passed Doctor Tessa on her way back to the infirmary, he snarled in her direction, never breaking a stride.

Coming to a stop, Eric found he could no longer follow Rebecca’s scent. Her sweet drugging scent was cut off as he came to a stop at the heavy door of the large medical storage room. Why would she need to talk to Damon in here?

Carefully pushing the door open, he stepped into the sun lit room. Immediately Rebecca and Damon’s combined scents hit him in the face. It should be
his
scent mixed with hers and
his
only.

In time,
He silently assured himself.
Breathe. Control.

Past several shelves he could hear their murmuring voices, but he was too frenzied at retrieving his mate to pay attention to their words. Moving on quiet steps, he flattened his body against a shelf, peering around the edge. He needed to retrieve his mate; but he needed to know what pull Damon had over her. Observing them for a moment wouldn’t cause any harm.

Gripping the edge of a wooden shelf, he felt his hands pulverize the thick wood to splinters as his eyes took in the sight before him. Just a few feet away stood Rebecca…being kissed by Damon.

His eyes took notice of how Damon held her against his body. His arm around her waist as his free hand buried amongst the strands of her ponytail, his clenching fingers holding her close as his mouth moved over her.

Killing rage seized him. It was official. He was going to let loose his wolf and kill Damon in the most bloody and painful way possible and if he was lucky, he’d have time to shift to his human form and do some damage as well before the traitor died.

Glancing away, he gritted his teeth as his wolf fought to attack. If he attacked Damon now; he risked his human mate. Sighing, he forced himself under control. He blocked out the sound of their hushed voices as they spoke. He didn’t want to hear what the two were saying to each other. If Rebecca were to say that she loved Damon, there was no way his wolf would be able to remain calm. It was Beth all over again. Why would fate be so cruel to give him his true mate and have her fall for another? He vowed silently that he would fight this time. He wouldn’t another mate to leave him. Rebecca was his, if he had to win her from Damon, he would do so.

As he focused on his breathing to bring down his primal aggression, a thought occurred to him. As they had kissed, Eric had noticed that Rebecca didn’t return Damon’s embrace, nor had her lips moved against Damon’s with willing abandon. Not like they had with his.

When he’d taken Rebecca last night, she’d clawed at him as her lips moved over him. Her body had strained against his, as though she couldn’t get close enough. Even this morning she’d responded to his kiss with such passion even without him touching her. Was it possible that Rebecca didn’t want Damon? The thought gave him hope.

When he could finally see past the red haze of jealousy that had clouded his mind, Eric turned back to the two. This time, Damon had his arms around her in a different way. His arms held her to his chest while his hand smoothed tenderly over the top of her head. More focused, Eric picked up more scents in the room; sadness and fear. The bitter smelling emotions rolled off Rebecca in waves, urging him to go to her. But when Damon spoke, Eric felt his feet freeze, unmoving.

“I promise to stay until the next full moon; that’s a week away. According to my information, Eric has summoned everyone to gather here in the next few days. He plans to use the opportunity to draw out his enemies. You need to tell him before someone tries again.”

Tell him what? Though he was furious that Rebecca had turned to Damon for comfort when she was obviously upset over something, he felt his mind whirl at what he was hearing. What was Rebecca hiding from him? He recalled their conversation earlier this morning, how she’d told him that she had parts of her that he would never touch. How bad was it that she felt more safe telling Damon than him?

“You promise you won’t leave me?” Rebecca’s voice sounded pleading. Like a child begging a parent not to leave them alone in a dark room. There was so much fear in her. Her fear would be his enemy and he would defeat it. He just needed to discover what she was hiding.

Gazing down at her fondly, Damon cupped the side of Rebecca’s face as he said, “For as long as you need me, I promise.”

Unable to stand remaining in the shadows any longer, Eric stepped from his hiding place. “She doesn’t need you.” He smirked when he saw Damon’s and Rebecca’s startling gaze turning to look at him. Focusing on Damon, Eric bit out. “She’s mine and you; my back stabbing friend are dead.”

Lowering his hands from Rebecca, Damon stepped away from her. Holding his hand out, Damon lowered his head in the universal shifter sign of surrender. Eric scoffed. Like that would save him in the end. The thought of wiping the floor with Damon on principle alone was tempting, but he had more important things to do first, such as discovering what Rebecca was hiding from him.

“How…” Rebecca began with a shaky voice. “How long have you been watching us?”

“Long enough to see that Damon doesn’t know how to keep his lips to himself.” He bit out with a narrowing look to Damon.

Turning to look down at Rebecca as her face flushed, Eric couldn’t resist reaching out to her. Grabbing the front of her blouse, he jerked her to him. Ignoring her gasp, he cupped the sides of her face. He could feel her breasts rising and falling against his chest as she panted for breath. With a concentrating look, Eric smoothed the thick pad of his thumb over her lower lips, wiping away whatever lingered of Damon’s lips.

When his hands fell away from her, Eric smirked at her look of confusion. “When I kiss those lips, I want to only taste you—no one else.”

Aware that Damon was watching their exchange, Eric rounded on him. “This is the second time that I’ve caught you with your filthy mouth on my woman.” as though sensing Rebecca’s outraged response, Damon grinned with a boyish shrug.

Whack! With a dark scowl, Rebecca slapped the back of her hand against Eric’s chest. Though she’d most likely put a good amount of strength behind her slap, it felt like a love tap to him.

“Way to make me feel like some toy to be fought over!” she hit him again, her breath escaping with frustrated pants. Shoving impatiently at a lock of hair that had escaped from her ponytail to fall in her eyes, she glared at Eric. “If you even think about attacking Damon I promise I will make you sorry.”

She’s so fierce, so beautiful…So mine…

Rubbing a hand over the spot where her hand had struck him, he smirked down at her. Right over his heart. She couldn’t have hit a more appropriate spot. Emotions that Eric would normally scoff at the mention welled up. He had to uncover everything he could about his mate, because for the first time in years, he was seeing things with perfect clarity.

He was in love this scowling human, with Rebecca.

Looking around the room that Eric had just pushed her into, Rebecca took note of her surroundings. The room was nearly the size of her whole small apartment. In the center of the room against the wall was a four poster bed, king size if she had to guess. The frame was made of artistically carved wood. The heavy headboard against the wall held detailed carvings of trees with a full moon rising behind, three wolves running free. Jerking her eyes from the beautiful masterpiece, she also took note of a wide six drawer dresser to against the opposite wall. To the right of the enormous bed was three floor-to-ceiling windows covered by a heavy blue curtain.

Stepping further into the room, she noticed another door to the left of the bed. Walking over to it, she turned the polished silver knob and shoved the door open. The open doorway opened up into a deluxe bathroom. Her eyes widened as she took in the amazing sight of a gray and white covered tub that seemed to be built into the wall. Beside the tub/pool was a glass enclosed shower. Of course the bathroom also held a toilet and a large sink area; she had to admit her attention kept returning to that large bath tub or whatever it was.

At the sound of the bedroom door closing gently, she turned to step out of the bathroom to see if Eric had left her alone finally. Not surprised she watched as he leaned carelessly against her only way out of the room she was in. His arms crossed over his chest almost in a challenging fashion. Did he think she would attempt to escape from him again? Shaking her head, she thought back to moments ago.

After he discovered Damon and her in the storage room, Eric had started up on his possessive bullshit once more. It was strange that he hadn’t actually attacked Damon this time though. Instead he’d shoved Damon up against a shelf, pinning him in place with just a hand to his throat. Smirking, Damon had just stood there unafraid of Eric’s show of dominance, which only served to piss Eric off all the more.

With words force through clenching teeth, Eric had said. “Stay away from her. This is your last warning.”

Jerking his hand away from Damon’s throat, Eric had turned to face her. At that moment she’d felt her heart race as he’d strode back towards her. She had to wonder what all he’d actually over heard and she’d made a mental note to find out. Without another word to her or Damon, Eric had done what he usually did with her; shackled her wrist with his hand and preceded to drag her to where ever he wanted. Not keen on ending up thrown over his shoulder for the second time that day, she’d furiously bit her tongue as he’d dragged her past people like she was a suitcase. He’d led her through the main lobby and up a flight of wooden steps to the second level.

After being towed down a long hall, he’d jerked to a stop outside the room she was now in. was this to be her bedroom while she was here? How long would she be here? As the thought occurred, she felt doubt fill her mind. If she was in fact Eric’s true mate or whatever Damon had called it, she doubted he would just let her go.

Despite Damon’s advice that she tell Eric the truth, she found herself hesitant to do so. It wasn’t something that she could just come out and say. What would his reaction be to having been lied to, to being fooled all this time? She doubted he would take it well. She scoffed mocking her own thoughts. He’d probably gift wrap her for his pack. Serve her up on a silver platter and all.

“Do you like it?” Eric's voice cut through the air with an almost impatient tone.

Jerking her head up to look at him, she casted a final look around. “It will do.” She finally answered with a lift of her shoulders. She bit her lip to prevent from smiling as his expression tightened at her answer. Apparently her answer mattered to him. Shoving her hands in the pockets of her barrowed sweats, she walked toward the bed, taking a seat on the firm mattress, she met his eyes.

“It’s nice—more than nice actually. Is this to be my room?” she asked, smoothing her hand over the soft comforter.

“In a way.” He agreed with a nod. “You’ll be sharing it with me.”

Her hand froze against the comforter. “What?”

Shoving back from the door, Eric’s face grew serious. “Why did you need to talk with Damon without me there?”

Rising from the bed, Rebecca did her best not to appear unnerved by his question. “That’s between us. It’s none of your business.”

Like flipping a light switch, Eric’s expression turned from stern to mocking. “None of my
business
?” he laughed before his words turned serious. “
Everything
to do with you is my business.” Spinning away from her to pace a few steps he turned back to her. “Do…you love him?” he asked not meeting her gaze.

Rebecca felt herself go still at the question. She was used to Eric’s jealous behavior. It was absurd to her the idea that she was meant to be
his
, but she’d been around shifters enough to know how
mate bonds
worked. If Eric saw Damon as a threat, it was possible that Eric would kill him. She had to put Damon out of the equation. Until she was certain that she could trust Eric fully, she had to keep her only lifeline hidden.

She shook her head. “No.” she answered softly.

Instantly Eric’s head jerked up towards her. “You-You don’t?” the knowledge seemed to confused and gladden him. “Then why the hell did you kiss him?” he bit out, clearly remembering what he’d seen.

Sighing, Rebecca took a step towards him. “What’s it matter? All you need to know is that Damon is a friend—a friend only.”

“A friend that keeps your secrets, Secrets you have yet to tell me.” He stated accusingly.

And just with those words, Rebecca felt the crushing weight choking her lessen. Eric hadn’t heard everything. If he had; he would know
what
Damon and she had been talking about. He didn’t know. She sighed with relief.

“Yes.” She answered. Turning away from Eric, she pretended to study the bed once more as her chaotic thoughts turned inward. She had to get some space from him to think. Where did she go from here with Eric? Her eyes turned toward the bathroom with a thought. Latching onto the excuse for all she could use it for, Rebecca turned back to look at Eric. He seemed to be studying her. “I’m going to take a shower. Do you have anything I can change into?”

Raising a brow at her, he smirked. “Are you running again?” slowly stalking across the room to her, he chuckled low. “I would have thought you learned that I won’t let you do that anymore.”

“I’m just taking a shower, Eric.”

Why did he have to smile at her like that? Already she would feel her body quaking and shivering with need to touch him, to kiss him. She was done for, absolutely done for. How in the world would she be able to share a room with him and not want to climb into that ridiculously big bed with him?

Stepping in front of the path to the bathroom door, she found all amusement had fled Eric’s expression. With a pensive tone, he asked. “Why did you think you couldn’t trust me with your secrets, yet you told Damon?” pausing, he took in an unsteady breath as his eyes hardened. “Did last night mean nothing to you?”

Heart stilling at his words, she resisted the urge to go to him, to wrap her arms around him and tell him everything. The truth was; last night had meant everything to her. Last night, she’d allowed herself to be held, loved and in the process; she’d allowed herself to forget about the ghosts that haunted her every waking minute. Since the attack, she couldn’t remember a single time when she’d allowed herself that simply luxury.

Biting down on her lip, she paused to consider her words before answering. “It didn’t mean nothing, Eric.” when hope seemed to light his eyes, she quickly added. “I don’t know what it meant to me. I want to trust you. I want to know that no matter what happens I can count on you to be beside me.”

Reaching out to cup her face, he stepped closer, his thumbs moving in smoothing circles over her cheekbones. “Then trust me.” He said, his eyes pleading.

Reaching up, her shaking hands wrapped around his wrists. “How can I? I don’t even know what is going on. Why can’t I go home? Why were we attacked this morning?” after taking a shaky breath, she then asked. “What is this scheme that Jason and Chris said you were involved in?”

Slowly and reluctantly, his hands slid from her face to drop to his sides. His eyes looked almost pained. His mouth opened to say something; whatever he intended to say, she’d never know. With his eyes growing cold and distant as they normally did when he was about to shut her out, he said, “I am taking care of the situation.”

It surprised her when a wave of disappointment hit her at his refusal to tell her anything. Deep down, she’d hoped that he’d confide in her. If he told her something that would show her that he trusted her completely, maybe then she wouldn’t feel like she was walking through a field of explosive mines when it came to telling him the truth. But he didn’t even trust her to answer a single question she’d asked of him.

“Why would I trust you when you won’t even trust me with your own secrets?”

With a scowling look at her, Eric jerked his eyes from hers before weaving around her to go to the covered window. “You need to trust that I know what the right decision is.

Heaving out a heavy sigh, Rebecca turned from him and disappeared into the spacious bathroom. Closing the door behind her, she leaned her weight against it.

She couldn’t explain the hurt that assailed her at his refusal to talk to her, to confide in her. If this is what Eric would feel when she told him, she knew now that he would
never
choose her. She was a fool to think that she could ever trust him. There was nothing between them to ensure her that he would
choose
her. Even if she was his fated mate, the one meant for only him and him for her, if he didn’t trust her, what hope did they have at a future?

What hope do I have that he will choose me?

* ~ * ~ *

When the door closed softly behind her, Eric flinched, his eyes sliding closed with regret. He was just an idiot! She’d looked at him with such urging, such need. Not a sexual or sensual need, but an emotional one. She’d wanted him to confide in her. He had wanted to tell her about him, what he was and why they had been attacked. He wanted to tell her that he feared for her safety and the need to keep her close to him was undeniable. That she was quickly becoming everything to him. He had wanted to tell her
everything
, but he hadn’t.

He knew that if he unloaded the weight of the knowledge that he carried held upon Rebecca, she could collapse. He wanted them to get past the secrets they both held. He longed to be mated to her, to belong to her. Had he blown his chances with his brash words?

Lowering his large body to the edge of the bed, he dropped his head into his left hand with a silent groan. He had to fix this. He had to show her that she could trust him with her secrets, but to do that, he would need to do some digging into his own vault of them.

Remembering Damon’s words from earlier only confirmed to him that he was running out of time with Rebecca. In just two days, the pack would gather. He would stand before every wolf shifter under his rule and beside him would be his mate; Rebecca.  He would have to tell her before then what he was or it would mean her death.

Never before had he wished to be something other than what the creator had made him, but now he wished with his entire being that he was different, that he was just a normal human man. Would she still wish to be around him when she found out that he was a monster, a man that could change from man to beast in a blink of an eye? No. he couldn’t risk telling her too soon or he would lose her.

Never before had he wished to ask that stupid bear, Doyle for advice when it came to human mates. However after his last conversation with Doyle, he doubted the bear would even take his call.

Note to self: Apologize to the bear for snarling at his mate before I have a very big, grizzly problem to contend with.

Back to the problem at hand, he knew what needed to be done. He had to win her. Show her that he needed her in his life and that he had fallen for her. Lifting his head from his hands, a smile lit his face as an idea formed in his mind. Of course; why hadn’t he thought of it before? His solution was simple. He had to get Rebecca to trust him in order to ensure that she wouldn’t run in fear from him once he revealed his beast.