How to Fall in Love (23 page)

‘Jesus,’ I rubbed my face wearily. We were in for a long night.

Adam had gone back to my flat under strict instructions to complete the fifteen-hundred-piece jigsaw puzzle I’d bought for him. He had been unimpressed and unmotivated by the oil painting of a stormy sea puzzle that I’d been doing with him for an hour every day, so I’d purchased a topless babe on the beach jigsaw online, which had arrived that morning. I guessed he wouldn’t be starting at the border for that puzzle.

I arrived back in the early hours of the morning, exhausted from going round in circles with Amelia. If Elaine hadn’t been there it would have been easier to talk sense into her, but despite all my efforts, when I left late that night, Amelia was dead set on going to Kenmare.

‘How is she?’ Adam asked, bent over the coffee table with a piece in his hand. His forehead was furrowed, his lips pouted in concentration. It was sweet and it made me smile.

‘What?’ He looked up and caught me gazing at him.

‘Nothing. You just answered my queries on whether you were a bum or a boob man.’

‘Boob man all the way.’ He had successfully completed one boob. As I had predicted, not one piece of the frame had been put together. ‘This puzzle is much better than the last one, thank you.’

‘I aim to please.’ I got down on my knees and joined him in his quest.

I felt him watching me. He studied me for a bit and when I didn’t meet his gaze he continued: ‘I’m currently looking for a right nipple.’

We examined the glass table, our heads together. ‘There.’ I handed him a piece.

‘That’s not a nipple.’

‘It is – it’s a bit of the nipple and a bit of her armpit, and a bit of the sea. Look at the box: her nipple is hard and it’s about to knock that surfer in the background right off his board. See, that’s the board there.’ I pointed at the piece.

‘Oh yeah,’ he laughed. ‘You know, the way you talk, you turn me on like Irma.’

‘Irma,’ I snorted. ‘I can’t believe she asked for your number.’

‘And I can’t believe I gave her yours.’

‘You what?’ I shoved him. He shoved me back. It was all childish flirting and deliciously fun at the same time.

‘So what’s Amelia going to do?’

‘She’s a bit all over the place. It’s a huge shock, obviously. Though I wouldn’t be surprised if I heard I was adopted. Might even be a bit glad.’

‘Hear, hear,’ he concurred.

‘That’s from her thong.’ I handed him a piece.

We sat in a comfortable silence.

‘Amelia didn’t seem all that shocked, considering,’ he said suddenly. ‘Did you notice the way she rushed to find the year she was born? She was frantic.’

‘She said she hadn’t a clue,’ I protested, though deep down I agreed with Adam’s instincts.

‘And I say she knew. Sometimes you can know a thing even when you don’t know,’ he said, looking at me.

And there it was again. That sentence. I was looking at him in surprise.

‘What’s wrong?’

‘Nothing.’ I swallowed. ‘Just
…’ I changed the subject. ‘Elaine is trying to convince Amelia that she needs to go to Kenmare to find her biological parents.’

‘Elaine needs her head checked.’

I was silent.

He looked up at me. ‘You do know it’s a ridiculous idea, don’t you?’

‘I do. But Amelia wants to do it.’

‘Of course she wants to do it. In the space of a week her entire world has toppled on her head. She’s not thinking properly. She’d agree to go to the moon if someone suggested it.’

What he said hammered home. Not about Amelia, but about him. His world had almost ended on Sunday night, he wasn’t thinking properly; he would do anything to make it right. I happened to be that anything. I swallowed hard, knowing that this experience was for him, not for me. I needed to extricate myself from the situation, I needed to stop
feeling
for him. I needed to get him out of Dublin, out of my life, and I needed to start fixing his life, laying the groundwork so that it would be comfortable enough to slip into, then I’d tuck him in and say goodnight and goodbye.

‘I’ve never known Amelia to want to go anywhere in all the time we’ve been friends. She wouldn’t go away for a weekend, or if she did it was under protest. She could never go anywhere, she’s never even been out of the country. Her wanting to do this trip is a really big deal, regardless of whether she finds her biological parents or not. I told her I’d bring her to a private detective tomorrow to see if he can help.’ I sighed. I was going to have to put Amelia to one side. ‘Adam, we need to go to Tipperary. We need to fix things there. We’ve done what we can with Maria for now, it’s time to leave Dublin for a few days. I’ll have you back in time for your birthday, all set to announce that you’re not taking over Basil’s. You’ll get your Maria back, your coast guard job back, Basil’s will be rescued and I’ll be out of your hair for ever.’ I smiled tightly.

He didn’t look too happy about it.

‘Don’t look so miserable. We’ve one more thing to do tomorrow before we leave Maria for a few days.’

I picked up the box beside the door; another delivery that morning. Insomnia was good for some things. Online shopping.

‘What’s in that box?’ He eyed it suspiciously.

‘Maria said she wants to see you. Well, tomorrow, she is going to see you. A lot.’ I opened the box and revealed its contents. ‘Ta-da!’

His beautiful face lit up as he looked at me in amazement. ‘Christine, I wish the world was filled with people like you, do you know that?’ he laughed.

So fill your world with me!
I shouted at him in my head.

17

How to Stand Out from the Crowd

The following morning the jigsaw had been abandoned. Eager for his next project, Adam was standing in the centre of Dublin wearing a white-and-red woolly hat with a red bobble, a black wig peeking out beneath it, round black glasses, a red-and-white striped jumper, his own blue jeans and a walking stick. One look at him kitted out as Where’s Wally and I’d started laughing and hadn’t been able to stop. Even dressed as Wally, he was beautiful.

Maria was going up the escalator in Marks and Spencer’s when she saw, directly beside her but going down, a man who looked remarkably like Adam dressed as Where’s Wally. He didn’t look in her direction once, his head was held high and his eyes looked straight ahead. The expression on his face never changed, leading her to question whether it was an act carried out for her or merely a coincidence. But it was when she was putting broccoli into her basket and Where’s Wally walked past her pushing an empty shopping trolley, disappearing round a corner as soon as she tried to follow him down the aisle, that she began to suspect it might be for her. When she was sitting on the fourth floor of Brown Thomas department store having a manicure and the same man walked by, weaving in and out of the clothes rails and eventually disappearing, she was sure it was him. Catching sight of him from the corner of her eye as she was buying flowers on Grafton Street confirmed it, and when she was buying a coffee in Butler’s and he walked by the window before ducking out of view, she was laughing out loud. As she walked across the bridge in Stephen’s Green, she was scanning the park for a sight of him. A flash of red caught her eye and she saw him on the path beneath the bridge. She watched him enter on one side, and she ran to the other side of the bridge to catch him exit. From that moment, every time she saw a flash of red she found herself stopping and staring, anticipation fluttering in her stomach that he would appear again.

‘Adam!’ she called from the bridge, but he didn’t look up at her. Ignoring her, he stayed in character and continued his jovial Where’s Wally jaunt, goofy and geeky with his funny walk, swinging his cane cheerily, his oversized rucksack on his back.

She roared with laughter. Passersby gave her strange looks, but she didn’t care. If she’d been able to stretch her vision to see beyond the trees he disappeared behind, she would have stopped laughing. She would have seen the couple who’d been in the dark street near the restaurant the previous night, again breaking into laughter when he felt it was safe to abandon the Wally persona. Everywhere she saw that one man, she didn’t see the woman behind him, with him, beside him, urging him on, supporting him. If she had, she might have wondered then who the display was really for.

‘Come on, you crazy man.’ I pulled Adam’s Wally hat off and threw it in his face. ‘Let’s get out of here, I’m hungry.’

‘Hungry?’ he asked in mock surprise. ‘I can’t believe it, we’re healed.’

We sat together, me eating salad, but a little more elaborate than usual with walnuts in it, and he with his hot chicken dish. In no time at all we’d both cleared our plates.

I burped under my breath and Adam laughed. ‘Look how far we’ve come,’ he said.

He gave me a look that made my stomach flip. Then the knowledge of how this was to end made me lose my appetite all over again. Thankfully I was distracted by a phone call from Oscar, who needed to chat to me while he sat on the bus. Afterwards, reminded of my role at quite the perfect time, I got back to business.

‘Today I’m feeling
…’ I looked at him for more.

‘Today I’m feeling
… stuffed?’

‘It’s not a quiz, you know, you can’t get the answer wrong.’

He thought about it. ‘Today I’m feeling
… happy. Restored. No not restored, renewed. Like I’m me, but a better version of me.’ He looked at me intently. ‘Does that make sense?’

I couldn’t help it, I had to look away otherwise my eyes would reveal too much to him. Instead of meeting his gaze I focused on the salt and pepper canisters that I was idly pushing around the table. ‘Good. I take it this is because you believe you have won Maria over again?’

He seemed confused by the question.

‘What I’m asking is, are you ready to move on and get to the rest of business?’

He breathed in. ‘That didn’t go so well at the hospital.’

I had no answer for that. I started picking at my salad again. ‘Why did you have a meeting with your cousin Nigel? He claimed that you talked about a merger.’

‘I wanted to see him. I hadn’t set eyes on him since we were twelve – can you believe that? The bad blood between Bartholomew’s and Basil’s was all between our fathers as far as I was concerned. My grandfather’s will specifically states that if I don’t take over the company, it falls to Nigel. I wanted to know what his intentions were, what he would do for the company.’

‘You wanted a truce.’

‘It didn’t even occur to me that we needed a truce. Like I said, as far as I was concerned the quarrel was between our fathers, not us. I was looking for a way out, Christine. I wanted him to say he’d run the company exactly the way it should be run. Instead, he started talking about a merger, as if we were doing the deal right there and then.’

‘And you told him no?’

‘I listened. I mean, would it be so bad if Bartholomew and Basil united? It was my grandfather’s name so it would be fitting, and we’d leave all the bad blood behind us, start fresh. Merging the companies would help both brands. If there wasn’t a rift, my father would agree in a heartbeat. But Nigel’s just as bitter about the family firm as my uncle Liam. He wants to merge the two companies, then sell up. He said that way we could both get out of the business, spend the rest of our lives lying on a beach somewhere.’

Adam looked as if he wanted to punch a wall, the aggression was building up again. I put a hand on his arm for a moment.

‘But selling up sounds as though it would solve a problem for you.’

‘I don’t want to run the business, but there’s no way I want to be responsible for running it into the ground either. A lot of people are relying on me. I’d like to see Basil’s end up in the right hands, so it stays a going concern. I owe my father and my grandfather that much at least.’ He ran his fingers through his hair, exhausted by the whole affair.

‘You think your sister would sell the company?’

‘Lavinia would hold out ten years to qualify for her inheritance, then she’d sell it to the highest bidder, whoever that might be. But in order to do that, she’d have to come home, whereupon she’d be locked up – by me, if no one else, after what she did.’

‘Adam,’ I spoke gently. ‘If you had jumped, if you
do
jump, where would that leave the business?’

‘If I jumped, Christine, I wouldn’t have to worry about this sorry mess any more, that’s the bloody point.’ He threw money on the table, stood up and left the restaurant.

I sat before my dad at his desk. He was staring at me blankly.

‘Say that again?’ he said.

‘Which part?’

‘The whole thing.’

‘Dad, I’ve been talking for ten minutes!’ I shrieked.

‘And that’s precisely my point, you. You were talking for too long, too boring, my mind wandered. And can you explain why we have eggs smashed all over our garden since Tuesday?’

I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose for calm. ‘It’s part of his therapy.’

‘But you are not a therapist.’

‘I know that.’ I felt defensive.

‘So why isn’t he seeing a therapist?’

‘I’ve asked him to, but he won’t.’

Dad was silent, all joking aside for once. ‘You’ve taken on a lot here, Christine.’

‘I know that. But with all due respect I haven’t come here to be lectured on what I choose to do or not do with someone who needs help. Now, can we get back to the subject, please.’

‘Yes, I’m wondering what that was again.’

‘Dad, stop pulling her leg,’ Brenda warned from the back of the office.

I turned around and saw both of my sisters had sneaked in unnoticed. ‘Is nothing private in this family?’

‘Of course not,’ Adrienne said, moving into the room to sit at the desk with us. Brenda quickly joined.

‘Christine, my darling pet lambykins,’ Dad began, reaching out to hold my hands in his. ‘You do know that, when I leave the company, and the universe, I do not expect you to suddenly be at the helm. Of the company, that is, not the universe.’ He looked searchingly into my eyes. ‘I’m concerned about you. You’ve always been the one who thinks, while your sisters and I do, but these past few weeks you’ve been getting caught up in an awful lot of doing and not so much thinking.’