Honesty (2 page)

Justin stopped jogging as his expression
darkened. “Yeah, I saw him talking to you in class today,” Justin muttered, his
voice carrying a little annoyance.

Alena stole a glance at him. Was that
jealousy? She wondered. Was Justin really pissed that Shawn had been whispering
in her ear?

“I barely even know him,” Alena said
dismissively. “And I don't want to know him,” she added, in case Justin was
wondering.

She did not realize that Shawn was only a
few steps behind her. He liked to sit out on the bleachers after school and
scribble in his notebook. When he heard her words he started to turn the other
way.

“Oh Shawn,” Kristina called out before he
could escape. “Come on over,” she invited. “We were just talking about you.”

Justin's eyes narrowed even further as he
looked over Shawn. Alena winced as she realized that Justin must have heard
what she said. She turned slowly to face him, and his stormy gaze locked to
hers. Alena normally did not talk bad about anyone, except for maybe Kristina.
She didn't like to hurt people's feelings. But Shawn didn't look hurt. He
looked angry.

“I guess I was wrong,” he said in a cruel
tone. “About what you deserve,” he added, and then turned away from all three
of them. He stalked back off across the grass towards the school.

“Ouch,” Kristina laughed. “I think your
boyfriend is pissed,” she grinned as Alena glowered at her.

“He's not her boyfriend,” Justin snapped
sharply.

“Uh, what do you care?” Kristina demanded
as she looked him directly in the eyes. Alena's heart was fluttering as it was
clear now that Justin was completely jealous.

“I don't,” he stammered beneath Kristina's
intense stare. “I just mean, Alena and I are friends, and she would never be
with a guy like that. Right, Lena?” Justin asked.

Alena forgot all about the possibility that
she had hurt Shawn's feelings as she lost herself in Justin's baby blue eyes.

“Right,” she replied in a warm tone.

Kristina did not like the way the two of
them were staring at each other. She stepped boldly forward and pressed her
lips to Justin's in a sudden kiss, which surprised him.

Alena winced as she watched the kiss
deepen. By the time the two broke apart, Alena was halfway across the grass
walking back toward the school. Justin stared after her with a frown. Kristina
laid her head against Justin's chest and smirked up at him.

Alena was so confused as she lay awake that
night. One minute she was sure that Justin was completely into her, the next he
was with another girl, and then he was acting jealous. None of it made any
sense to her. Then she remembered what Sheila had said. Was it possible that
Justin didn't realize that she had been serious about him? Did he really think
that she just wanted to be friends? Alena turned over in her bed and buried her
face in her pillow. Maybe she had not made her intentions clear enough; maybe
all of this really was her fault. When she closed her eyes, she expected to
visualize Justin in her mind, but instead striking green eyes filled her
imagination. She was startled by the image of them so much that she sat up in
bed. Her heart was racing as she remembered the way he had looked at her
earlier that day. Alena tried to push the sensation down, but she honestly was
worried that he was angry with her. It shouldn't matter to her whether he was
or not. He had been rather rude to her, and she did not owe him anything. But
there was something about the way that he had looked at her, not as if he was
furious, but as if he was disappointed. The flutter of her heart when she
thought of him leaning forward to whisper beside her ear made her stare hard at
the ceiling. Was it possible that despite all of their differences she was
actually starting to have feelings for Shawn? She closed her eyes tightly and
tried to force the thoughts form her mind. It didn't matter. Right now she
needed to focus on Justin, and the possibility that she might be able to win
him back. Maybe if she just made it clear to him, he would realize the
opportunity he had missed. She fell asleep imagining his slow smile that always
left her dreaming of touching her lips to his.

When she woke to the alarm clock the next
morning, she did not want to throw it against the wall. She was determined to
let Justin know exactly how she felt. The entire ride to school she rehearsed
exactly what she would say. She would explain to him that she had thought he
knew how much she cared for him. That she wanted to make sure he knew.

When she reached her locker and opened it,
she found a single white rose laying on the top shelf.

“Wow,” she mumbled as she reached in and
picked it up. She sniffed its beautiful scent and smiled.

When she glanced around at the other
students in the hallway she expected to see Justin standing there. But he
wasn't, instead Sheila walked up.

“Where did you get that?” she asked with
obvious envy.

“I'm not sure,” Alena laughed as she held
the rose out to let Sheila take a sniff. “I found it in my locker, someone must
have left it there,” she winked as they began to walk toward their first class
together.

“Someone like who?” Sheila asked.

“Someone like, Justin,” Alena whispered,
almost too afraid to say it out loud.

“Alena,” Sheila warned as she looked
directly at her friend. “Justin is with Kristina.”

Alena shrugged a little and sniffed the
flower again. “Maybe, but he was acting really jealous at practice yesterday,
and I'm starting to think you were right. Maybe I should just walk up to him,
and tell him how I feel,” she smiled at the idea.

Sheila studied her friend closely. “And
what if he doesn't feel the same way?” she asked.

“He will,” Alena said confidently. “Who
else would leave me a rose?”

“I just don't want you to get hurt,” Sheila
warned. “Kristina can be vicious, you know.”

Alena smirked as she stepped into her
English class. “Let her be vicious,” her smirk widened into a grin. “Won't
change who Justin’s leaving flowers for.”

When Alena sat down at her desk she laid
the rose across the top of it. A few of the other girls in her class noticed it
and remarked on how pretty it was. Alena smiled but she was busy looking at the
classroom door, waiting for Justin to arrive. When he walked into the classroom
he barely looked at her. Alena furrowed a brow as she wondered if somehow he
had noticed that she was there.

“Hi Justin,” she chirped and adjusted the
rose on her desk. He looked over at her with a mild smile, until he noticed the
rose. Then his smile faded.

“Who gave you that?” he asked.

Is he teasing me? Alena wondered. But when
she looked into his eyes she didn't see any warmth there. All she saw was
annoyance.

“Alena, who gave it to you?” he asked
again.

Alena grabbed the rose and pulled it off
the top of the desk. Her cheeks were hot with embarrassment as she stared down
at her desk.

“No one, I just found it,” she cleared her
throat to hide the disappointment in her voice. When she heard the heavy thump
of a book bag being dropped to the floor behind her, she glanced over her
shoulder to see Shawn sit down behind her. He met her eyes, and opened his
mouth as if he was about to speak, but the teacher began to speak before he
could.

Alena turned back to face forward as
quickly as she could. She was mortified by how close she had come to accusing
Justin of leaving her the rose. He probably would have laughed at her.

“For this week's assignment we're going to
try something a little different,” the teacher was saying as she turned to face
the classroom. Ms. Harper was a young teacher and she had a reputation for
coming up with unique and interesting assignments. “Since we will be discussing
poetry this semester, I want you each to have the experience of going through
the writing process. It is really simple to write a poem for yourself, but it
is a bit more difficult when someone else gives you the subject matter. So I am
going to put you into pairs, and have each of you write a poem for the other,”
she paused a moment and swept her gaze over all of the students. “Your partner
will give you a few words, or a phrase, and you will write a poem based on that
information.”

Alena was not in the mood to be creative.
She was not in the mood to do anything but crawl back into bed and forget that
the school year had ever started. As Ms. Harper began calling out the partners
she hoped that she would not be paired with Justin. She was sure he would want
the subject to be Kristina and Alena could not imagine a harder poem for her to
write.

“Alena, you can work with Shawn,” Ms.
Harper said as she walked past her and then continued to assign the rest of the
partners. Alena held back a gasp as she heard the teacher's words. She had
never even thought about the possibility that she would be forced to work with
Shawn. After what she had said to him the day before, after what he had said to
her, it would not be easy to work together. She nervously glanced over her
shoulder to find Shawn staring hard at the open notebook in front of him. He
did not look up at her. Alena sighed as she slumped down in her desk. When her
gaze wandered over to Justin, she found him staring at her.

In the hall after class Justin caught up
with her. “Hey why don't you ask Ms. Harper to change your partner?” he
suggested.

“Huh, why?” Alena asked, still annoyed that
he had not been the one to give her the flower. She didn't even really care who
did, as Justin was the only boy in school she wanted a flower from.

“You shouldn't have to work with that guy,”
Justin insisted as they paused beside Alena's locker.

“Why do you care?” Alena suddenly asked.
She was getting weary of the game Justin seemed to be playing.

“I care about you Alena,” Justin said
quietly and met her eyes. When he looked into her eyes, Alena no longer heard the
buzz or chaos of the busy hallway. All she heard was the pounding of her heart.

“Really?” she asked breathlessly. Then
remembering the kiss he had shared with Kristina the day before, she forced
herself to look away.

“I do,” Justin insisted. “We spent the
whole summer hanging out, now you act like I don't even matter,” he protested
as she opened her locker. Alena stared at the white rose that was on the shelf
of her locker. It matched the one she had received that morning perfectly.
Maybe it had been Justin after all. Alena turned back to face him. She looked
at him for a long moment and then suddenly leaned up and touched her lips to
his. Justin was startled by the kiss and drew back away from him.

“Oh Alena,” he frowned as he shook his
head. “What are you doing? You know I'm with Kristina.”

Alena felt tears threatening the backs of
her eyes as she realized what a big mistake she had made.

“But I thought,” Alena whispered.

“I'm your friend,” Justin said firmly. “I
waited all summer for you to ask me for more, but you didn't. Kristina did.”

Alena's lips parted slightly with shock.
Not only had he just rejected her, but now he was claiming that it was her
fault for not pursuing him.

“I'm asking you now,” Alena murmured,
despite the fact that her cheeks were on fire.

“It's too late,” Justin said sternly. “I'm
with Kristina, and you're going to have to accept that.”

He started to turn away, and then looked
back. “When I get bored with her, you'll be the first on my list.”

Alena was so stunned by his words that she
could not even respond. First on his list? She thought to herself. The arrogant
bastard has a list? She felt her heart sink as she realized that Justin had
never been the person she thought he was. The whole summer when she thought he
was enjoying spending time with her, he had just been waiting for her to ask
him for more. All he had to do was kiss her, and he knew that, she was sure he
knew that, but he had strung her along because his ego needed her to ask. As
she watched him walk away she wished she had never even met him.