Read Home is Where the Heart Is (Home #1) Online
Authors: Cheynee Filkov
“I’m sorry,” Tate told her quietly.
Kimberley shrunk back like he’d shoved her. “You’re what?”
“I’m sorry.”
Kimberley wrapped her arms around her chest, a defensive move Isabelle was all too familiar with.
“Why? Aren’t you Team Barbie or whatever?”
Tate sighed deeply. “Look, I’m not thrilled that you punched Isabelle but I guess… I guess I can sort of understand why.”
Isabelle felt her whole body go cold.
What?
Kimberley scrunched her face up in disbelief
and then scoffed.
“Caring so deeply about someone that your whole world seems to just move around them is hard.
Loving
someone who is oblivious, that’s even harder. But to watch them choose someone over you, to know that even though you would do a better job at loving them and making them happy, and still not even be considered? Yeah, I can see how that would make someone do some pretty horrible, desperate things.”
“And which one would you be?” Kimberley asked curiously.
“All of the above, I guess.”
“Why are you telling me this?”
Tate shrugged. “I don’t actually know. I guess I don’t really have anyone else to talk to about it and I figure no one would believe you if you said anything.”
“You know you can’t even be a contender if you don’t put yourself in the running.”
“That would get me nowhere, trust me.”
“Because she’s too stupid to notice you?” Kimberley said darkly.
Tate’s eyes burned with rage again.
“Why do you do that?” he asked fiercely. “Every time you let a little softness in, you have to backtrack with cruelty. You can be strong without being a bitch, you know.”
Kimberley glared at Tate, and it looked like she was about to snarl something back but instead she took a deep breath and shook her hair out of her eyes.
“If you allow someone to get close, you allow them to break you,” she told him softly. “And I am done being broken.”
Silence drifted between them as Kimberley’s words sunk in. Isabelle wanted to hate her, really wanted to find no redeeming qualities in Kimberley but, as horrifying as it was, she could see a lot of herself in her.
“It’s not because she’s too stupid,” Tate said finally, after what felt like an eternity of silence.
“Pardon?”
“When you’ve known someone your whole life, they become a part of you,” he explained. “You know what their small facial expressions mean, what their tone of voice is really saying, you know what they’re feeling even if they don’t know they’re feeling it themselves.”
Tate let out a shaky breath. “I know exactly who I am to her, I know exactly where I stand and that pretty much means I will never be a contender, no matter what.”
Isabelle tuned out Kimberley’s response as her brain worked past the haze to put everything together. Was Tate talking about
her
? Was she the only girl he’s ever been in love with?
All at once pieces to a puzzle she had not even known she held fell into place - it all became clear to her now. Tate’s hatred of Jace, his desperate pleas that she stay away from Jason and pay attention to the people who really loved her. Countless times he had stayed over and she had woken up to him watching her sleep, holding her hand to his chest.
Oh.
Oh
. She had been such an idiot.
Feeling eyes burning into her she turned to Jace and the wry smile and sympathy in his eyes confirmed it all for her.
“Oh my god,” she whispered. “I didn’t…I mean, I wasn’t even trying to…”
Jace rubbed her leg gently. “You had no idea, huh?”
Isabelle shook her head, feeling shell shocked.
“Am I the only one who didn’t know?” she whispered.
Jace didn’t say anything, just looked right at her, giving her full access to those beautiful, expressive eyes.
Shit. Now everyone knew she was an idiot.
“Maia…” she began, remembering Maia’s strange behaviour.
Jace looked apologetic. “I’m really sorry about that, she was just trying to force you into figuring out if you had the same feelings for him or not.”
But I don’t. I love him so much, more than she loved herself or any of her other friends, but he was family, he had always been her family.
“How am I meant to deal with this? What the hell do I even say to him?”
Jace shuffled closer, putting Isabelle’s legs down so he was sitting and he could place himself right next to her.
“You don’t.”
“What?” she snapped. “I’m just meant to cut him out of my life now or something?”
“No,” he told her calmly. “You don’t say anything to him. You’re drunk, you don’t know what you heard or what you saw. Everything will be normal.”
Tears filled Isabelle’s eyes as shame coloured her cheeks.
“How is anything ever going to be normal again?”
He took her face in his hands, forcing her to look at him.
“That guy out there, that’s your best friend in the whole world, the guy who’s stuck with you your whole life, no conditions. He hasn’t just changed now that you know why he’s been so protective all these years, and he isn’t going to stop being the same person you always thought he was.”
“So, I just pretend like nothing happened?”
“There won’t be any pretending, Tate is your family and that means more than just one drunken confession.”
Isabelle nodded, slowly turning away from Jace so she could be alone in her thoughts.
This didn’t have to change anything, not if she didn’t want it to. They didn’t need to have that awkward talk and she didn’t have to crush the closest person to her heart and leave them both with nothing.
Her head became clearer and her resolve strengthened. Jace was right, she had already lost so much, and
nearly
losing Tate had almost killed her.
She had survived Jason, she had survived the almost unthinkable and then pretending like she wasn’t tainted for life, so this? This would be a walk in the park for her.
“Belle?”
Isabelle jumped a foot in the air at Tate’s voice.
He held his hands up to appease her as his eyes searched hers hungrily. “Sorry, are you ok?”
You can do this. This is just Tate, the guy you used to have tea parties with when you were younger.
“Is Dad here?” she asked in a shaky voice.
Tate’s eyes whipped between Isabelle and Jace shrewdly and noted their position in the window seat.
“Yeah, he’s here,” said Tate, holding out his hand.
She took it without hesitation; the warmth she had felt a million times before filled her palm and sent a wave of calm through her body. It was just Tate, her anchor to this world. She felt nothing different.
Waves of memories crashed over her as her whole childhood with Tate ran like a movie trailer before her. Tate having tea parties with her, painting her nails, letting her straighten his hair when he had worn it longer. Making his favourite dish on his birthday every year, and the handmade cards he gave her on her birthday in return.
They didn’t just grow up, they just simply grew together, and throughout all of her stages in life he had always been the one constant she could count on.
“You’re the best, Tate,” she blurted out and then instantly started to panic that it was the wrong thing to have said.
Tate raised an eyebrow. “No more shots for you. From now on, it’s chocolate milk and bed before ten.”
Isabelle smiled more to herself than anyone else, letting Tate wrap his arm around her shoulder and begin to lead her away. He stopped before they left the room completely, glancing behind at Jace who was exactly where Isabelle had left him.
“Are you coming or what?” Tate asked briskly.
Shock swept over Jace’s face for a moment before the usual mask of calm replaced it, and he stood without saying a word and followed closely behind them.
CHAPTER 8
JACE
Time as always waited for no one.
Jace had no idea how the hell it had gotten to the last day of holidays already, yet here he was, roped into a farewell lunch for Tate who was heading back home.
They were at his and Maia’s favourite beach side café, Cruise, with their regular group. Indulging in burgers, pancakes and milk shakes, and the sun smiling down on them, the skies clear of any clouds.
Jace smiled brightly to himself as he looked down at his hand on Isabelle’s knee where it had been for the past hour without any resistance. He had no idea what exactly had gone through her head the night of Ben’s party, whether or not hearing Tate’s declaration had been the turning point, but for the past few days it had been amazing between them. She was more accepting of his touches now, only pulling away on occasion, and almost always rewarding him with that megawatt smile that had him reminding himself to breathe each time he was lucky enough to receive it.
On cue he felt the familiar burning of Tate’s eyes on him and, as usual, Jace just looked up and gave the dude a bright smile and wink.
I’m not going anywhere buddy. How about you get used to it?
Tate inclined his head slightly, almost as if he understood Jace’s thoughts and his lips actually quirked up at the sides slightly like he was fighting a smile.
Jace sat with an amused smile on his face, trying to look interested in Maia telling everyone a very animated story about her and Matt’s first kiss, but he was still a bit lost in his thoughts. Isabelle wasn’t the only one who had changed towards him since that night.
While Tate had never been
nice
to him, the antagonism had stopped and he had been tolerant, if not amiable, towards him. Jace glanced over to Tate who was trying to conceal the fact he was texting someone under the table, a pleased look on his face.
Maybe it had something to do with the fact that Tate had been glued to his phone for the past couple of days and too distracted with his own little world to try and destroy Jace’s. He felt weirdly curious about the girl who had pulled Tate’s focus from Isabelle, and nervous about what was going to happen if Tate got his focus back and continued with their pissing contest over her affections.
“Jace, are you even listening?”
He snapped his head up to where Maia was glaring at him.
“Not really,” he replied sheepishly, earning a quiet chuckle from Isabelle.
“I should have eaten you in the womb when I had a chance,” Maia replied, rubbing her forehead with her fingers.
Jace laughed the insult off, knowing how empty Maia’s words really were. Maia rolled her eyes at him but her face was absent of any darkness.
“I was
saying
that you had better get a move on if you wanted Tate to make his flight. Unless of course you were deliberately trying to keep him here, so Tate can become Jace 2.0.”
Her eyes flicked to Isabelle meaningfully and Jace got the message loud and clear.
With a curt nod to his sister he patted Isabelle’s leg affectionately.
“Ready to bail?”
Isabelle nodded with a smile, letting Jace pull her out of her chair.
“It’s been great seeing you, man,” Ben told Tate with a slap on the back.
Tate grinned back at him and the total relaxation in his smile completely transformed his face, even Maia seemed affected.
Pulling him into her arms, Maia squeezed Tate tight. “Have fun back in Lamesville without us, try not to scowl with your face out the window or it’ll get stuck.”
Tate smiled at her affectionately, shook Matt’s hand briefly and then, before he could do much else, Giselle was upon him.
Fitting her lips over his she pulled him in close, leaving no room for escape.
Jace looked to Isabelle to see if there was any trace of jealousy or unease in her expression and was relieved to find she just looked amused.
Giselle finally released Tate, giving him a lusty wink. “Don’t be a stranger.”
With a slight flush to his cheeks Tate moved swiftly, grabbing Isabelle’s arm as he continued his path to the car.
Jace smirked at Giselle. “Very subtle.”
She shrugged. “I don’t believe in wasted opportunities.”
He waved goodbye to his friends and strolled to his Ute where Isabelle and Tate were already strapped in and waiting.
*
After checking into security and barely holding his tongue as Isabelle received the ‘random’ pat down from the young security guy, the trio waited at Tate’s gate for instructions to board.
“You’ll come back though, right?” Isabelle asked, her eyes wide.
Tate ruffled her hair affectionately before pulling her in for a hug that seemed weirdly platonic. Was this guy the best actor in the world or what?
When Tate released Isabelle, his eyes slid over to Jace and all warmth left them.
“Can I talk to you for a sec?” he asked.
Jace almost turned around, convinced there was no way Tate would be seeking
him
out for a personal goodbye, but Tate looked at him directly, an eyebrow raised, waiting for a response.